


7 years

by Rytchan



Series: Love is a complicated thing [2]
Category: Elite (TV)
Genre: Angst, Big Gay Love Story, Breaking Up & Making Up, Domestic Fluff, Drama & Romance, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut, Friendship, Heavy Angst, M/M, Sequel, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-08
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:55:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 51
Words: 161,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24062464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rytchan/pseuds/Rytchan
Summary: ***This work tells the story of Ander and Omar throughout seven years. 🔥💙🖤🥺🥰🌈***This work is a sequel and won't make any sense if read by itself.***
Relationships: Ander Muñoz/Omar Shana
Series: Love is a complicated thing [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1722235
Comments: 1068
Kudos: 643
Collections: Élite ▶ Omar Shanaa / Ander Muñoz





	1. Love is in the air

**Author's Note:**

> This work is the second part of "What Would Happen If ..." Focused on Omar and Ander's story and what will happen to them throughout seven years.
> 
> People who have read any of my previous works know that I have a particular weakness for writing drama and angst, so it is supposed this second part would be less dramatic and fluffier, but... 🙄😅😏😈  
> Anyway, I hope you all can enjoy it and have fun with the twists that this story will have.
> 
> It has the point of view of each character, indicated by ( ) at the beginning.
> 
> Thanks for reading and commenting. It's always motivating to know that there is someone who is enjoying this fic.
> 
> I'll be updating a chapter per week.
> 
> Ps. Unbeta, all mistakes are mine! I'm not a native English speaker; any mistakes you find are my own. So I apologize for it.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Omar shook his head, drawing a smile on his face when he realized that Ander wasn’t remotely aware of the power he had over him and although Omar didn’t mind feeling like that if he was honest with himself, he was a little worried that Ander could get fed up with him. And more now that, thanks to Azucena, they were currently studying the last year of high school together.

**_Chapter 1. Love is in the air_ **

****

**_Ander & Omar_ **

****

**_Three months later_ **

****

**_(Ander)_ **

****

He looked at the clock and knew he had to hurry. Omar had told him that he would pick him up at noon to go to the hospital together.

Nadia and Guzmán's baby had been born the night before, so they had agreed to go out to have lunch and later encounter with the new parents and meet little Marina.

Since their reconciliation three months ago, the relationship between them was better than ever. The first few days, both he and Omar seemed a little cautious. Both of them acted as if they were afraid that at any moment, the bubble of happiness in which they found themselves would burst, but little by little, relaxed as realized that this bubble wasn't as fragile as they believed.

He smiled as he remembered Omar's happy face when he left his apartment the night before. Since they got back together again, it seemed that the two of them were determined to make up all the lost time, as they had made love more times in the last three months than in the entire previous year. For Ander, it was almost a biological necessity to have Omar in his arms, and he had no intention of depriving himself of him.

The doorbell rang, and he quickly got up from the desk to look through the window, only to corroborate what he already knew. Omar greeted him with a _“Hey! Are you ready?”_ -While covering his eyes with his hand to protect himself from the sun’s rays.

_-I’m coming! Give me five minutes!_ -Ander yelled at him as he returned to the task that had kept him busy for the past half hour.

_“Fuck! He arrived earlier…”_ –He thought overwhelmed while he finished filling out the website form.

Once he entered the last data, Ander pressed the enter key and waited impatiently, drumming his fingers on the base of his laptop.

The sound of Omar’s characteristic footsteps going up the stairs made him jump up to his bedroom door to lock it.

_-Fuck!_ -He cursed when he realized that his mother had let him pass.

_“Come on, come on…”_ -He hissed at his laptop, mentally cursing the slowness of the process.

_“It’s almost done... Please!_ -He muttered nervously.

He noticed how Omar turned the doorknob, and seconds later, he heard him scream:

_-Ander? Did you lock yourself up? Could you open the door?_

_-Okay, I’m coming._ –He screamed more and more nervous.

_-Ander? What are you doing?_

_-Nothing, I’m coming._ –He answered once more.

Finally, the process concluded, and he smiled from ear to ear when the legend of: _“Congratulations, your reservation is confirmed and paid”_ appeared on the screen.

He took a pic of the screen with his mobile and closed the navigation window, then ran and took off the door's lock.

_-Hi!_ -He smiled at Omar as he tugged at the lapel of his shirt to kiss him. Omar kissed him back, but then he separated enough to look him in the eye.

_-What were you doing?_ -He asked, raising his eyebrow curiously.

_-Nothing, why? I was finishing dressing._ –He said, trying to hide his nervousness.

Omar shook his head. It was obvious that he didn't believe him and nothing helped the fact that he was lousy lying, so Ander wasn't surprised when Omar asked him again smiling:

_-Tell me the truth. Were you jerking off?_

As Omar said so, he brought his hand up to Ander's cock to check his theory, but feeling that he wasn't hard, he erased his smile from his face.

_-Asshole!_ -Ander replied, unable to help but laugh.

_-As if you weren't able to do it, asshole..._ -Omar insisted, looking at him intrigued.

_-Come on; you're crazy._ –Ander replied as he kissed him again, trying to distract him. And he continued:

_-I don't need to jerk off when I have the most handsome boyfriend, dumbass!_

And before Omar insisted on the matter again, he separated from him and said:

_-Come on; we should go..._ -And slapping him on the butt, he left his room, waiting for Omar to follow him.

*******

****

**_(Omar)_ **

They were just finishing eating when Ander’s cell phone started vibrating. He saw his boyfriend take a sip of his beer and then read the message he had received.

He saw him smile and couldn’t help but feel a twinge on the stomach. Ander had always seemed attractive to him, but since they had gotten back together had seen him even more handsome, and the twinge of desire he felt in his crotch when those pinkish lips curved into a seductive smile was proof of this.

Omar shook his head, drawing a smile on his face when he realized that Ander wasn’t remotely aware of the power he had over him and although Omar didn’t mind feeling like that if he was honest with himself, he was a little worried that Ander could get fed up with him. And more now that, thanks to Azucena, they were currently studying the last year of high school together.

He still remembered the emotion that overwhelmed him when Azucena offered to get him a scholarship to study at Las Encinas.

_“Seriously, Omar it’s the least I can do after you didn’t graduate because you were taking care of Ander. Would you like to study here?”_

_“Are you serious, mom?”_ –Ander had asked, unable to hide his enthusiasm.

_“It would be incredible to be able to study with Ander. Thank you, Azucena”._ –He had answered while looking at his boyfriend smiling excitedly.

_"Well, it will be then."_ –She had answered while hugging him.

The course had started a month ago, and until now, everything was going perfectly between them. Still, Omar couldn't help thinking that the fact of sharing many more hours a day could make their relationship routine, and therefore, Ander might get bored of him.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Because of that, when Ander suggested that he could leave his apartment to save that money and return to live with him and his mother, Omar had flatly refused. And although Ander had been disappointed, he didn't insist on it.

He breathed deeply, putting aside his fear, and releasing the air he had been holding without realizing it, he asked:

_\- Who is it, babe?_

_-It's Guzmán._ –He answered, leaving the mobile on the table while looking for the waiter.

_-They're waiting for us at the hospital. We should pay and leave. Do you agree?_ –He asked, smiling.

_-Okay... I think we'll have to leave the dessert for another time._ -He complained as he observed him trying to see if Ander caught the double meaning of his words, and wasn't disappointed when he heard him say:

_-We could defer dessert for tonight, how does that sound?_

_-Mmm... Let me think about it..._ -He joked.

_-Mmm... That’s a yes, then. I know you, Omar._

Omar laughed and, approaching Ander gave him a slow kiss before standing up. It felt so good to be able to kiss his boyfriend wherever he wanted, without having to look over his shoulder, worried that someone might see them.

*******

****

**_(Ander)_ **

****

When they got to the hospital, Ander couldn't help but feel a chill run through his body, remembering all the times he'd been sitting for long hours receiving chemotherapy. It seemed as if what he had lived just a few months ago had happened to someone else and not to him. He forced himself to push those memories away, exhaling the air he had been holding.

However, Omar knew him so well that his attitude didn't go unnoticed, so he gently took him by the shoulder.

_-Are you okay, babe?_

He looked at him somewhat dubiously and shaking his head, smiled slightly.

_-Yes, it's just that I remembered when I spent a lot of time here, and I didn't know if I would be able to surpass..._

Omar looked at him sadly but quickly recovered himself. He approached him and brushed his lips with his, whispering:

_-Everything is okay now._

Ander smiled back at him, and they continued on their way. While they were waiting in the elevator, Omar approached him and hugging him, pressed his lips against his neck, while saying in a whisper:

_-You know? I've never fucked in an elevator, but I bet it would be very horny._

_-It seems to me that one day we should try, right?_ –Ander answered, lowering his hand to touch Omar in the crotch through the jeans' fabric. He smirked, seeing that Omar was getting hard, so he walked over to him and traced a series of wet kisses along his neck.

When the sound of the elevator indicated that they were arriving, Omar gave him one last kiss on the corner of his lips, and they both smiled, sharing a knowing look.

As they stepped out into the hallway that would lead them to Nadia's room, the smile faded from his face as he saw who was walking towards them.

Ander wanted to turn around and go away, but the elevator doors had already closed, so he swallowed hard and turned to see Omar.

Omar looked serious, but there was yet another expression on his face that made Ander feel even more nervous.

_-Come on…_ –He listened to Omar as he walked with determined steps towards his parents, who looked at them in surprise.

_-Shit!_ -Ander whispered, walking beside him, trying to remain calm.

_-Mama, Baba..._ -Ander heard Omar greet his parents.

Omar's mother seemed nervous while his father looked at them grimly.

It seemed that he would meet Omar's parents much sooner than he would have liked, and he hoped that Omar's father was sensible enough to maintain control in that hospital room.

_-Omar, son, how are you? We just met the little baby._ –Omar's mother said, breaking the uncomfortable silence.

_-How cool! That's why we've come to, as well_. –And clearing his throat, Ander saw Omar addressing his father, saying:

_-Baba, this is Ander, my boyfriend. Ander, they're my parents._

As soon as he heard Omar pronounce the word _"boyfriend,"_ he noticed the bewilderment on Omar's mother's face, but instead, the father seemed unmoved. He wiped the sweat from his hands against his pants and muttering, _"Nice to meet you, sir,"_ he held out his hand.

A few seconds passed, during whom Ander feared that Omar's father would leave him with an outstretched hand, but to his surprise, he shook his hand with a firm squeeze.

_-Hello boy._ –It was his only answer.

Then he looked at Omar's mother and nodded to her, but she gave him a genuine smile.

_-One day both of you should come to have dinner at the house, Omar_. -She suggested, looking at them.

_-Of course, Mama. We would like that a lot, wouldn't we, Ander?_

_-Of course, thanks. It's very kind of you_. -Ander managed to murmur, unable to hide his nervousness.

After Omar's parents said goodbye, Ander watched them walk down the long corridor, hissing in relief:

_-Fuck! For a moment, I thought your father would hit me._

But Omar didn't answer him. He had glassy eyes and a smile on his face like a small child who had just been given the best gift. Seeing him, Ander felt moved and putting an arm around Omar's neck, pulled him to kiss him on the temple.

_-Do you have any idea how much I love you?_ -Ander murmured against Omar's ear.

Omar leaned his head against Ander's, and seconds later, he answered happily:

_-Yes, I do._

They spent the rest of the afternoon with Nadia and Guzmán. She looked radiant, and Ander had never seen Guzmán so happy while holding his little daughter in his arms.

Omar, on the other hand, couldn't help but admire his little niece and took every opportunity to hold her. For a moment, as Ander watched him, he thought about how cool Omar looked with the baby in his arms. He never imagined that his boyfriend would have a soft spot for babies, and then the image of Omar becoming a father assaulted him.

_"What the hell do you imagine?"_ -He mentally scolded himself.

They were both very young, with thousands of things still to live, and imagining Omar as the father of a beautiful baby, had no place. _"Why had I thought something like that?"_ He meditated, feeling ridiculous.

_-What are you thinking?_ –Ander listened to Guzmán, looking at him curiously.

_-Nonsense..._ -He replied, in turn, standing up.

That night like every weekend since they were back together, they returned to Omar's apartment. When it was Omar's turn to work, most of the time, Ander accompanied him, and then they returned home together.

_-Are you hungry?_ –Omar opened the fridge looking for some food.

_-Mmm... I feel like going straight to dessert_. -Ander hugged him from behind, wrapping his arms around Omar's waist as he began to kiss his neck.

Omar shifted in his arms, laughing out loud, trying to break free of his embrace, and Ander smirked as he saw Omar's goosebumps at his touch.

_-You tickle me! Stop, dumbass!_

Ander held him tighter, laughing too, biting him gently. They struggled for a while longer until he finally released Omar and ran to the bedroom, jumping on the mattress.

_-You're going to pay dearly for this, asshole!_ –Omar laughed, landing next to Ander while trying to normalize his breathing.

Once they both stopped laughing, Ander straddled Omar and looked him straight in the eye as his lips curved into a natural smile. He felt happy.

With his thumb, he caressed Omar's bottom lip, enjoying the sensation that those silky lips caused him, and smirked victoriously when he saw his boyfriend open his mouth, trying to catch his finger between his teeth.

The next half hour, they forgot about everything except enjoying each other. Hoarse moans, horny words, wet kisses... It was all love and desire. When they both cum, Ander came out of Omar and letting himself fall on him, he rested his head against Omar's chest.

_-Would you like to shower?_

_-Only if you do it with me_. -As he stood up, he took Omar by the hand and entered the shower with him.

Back in the room, Omar put on underpants and lay against the fluffy pillows. He turned to see him and patting the mattress, called out to him.

_-Come here, babe. I want to hug you._

Ander smiled. He lit a cigarette and taking the ashtray, lay down against Omar's chest. Omar put an arm around him as he took the cigar from him for a drag.

_-Babe... you should quit._

Ander sighed. He knew Omar was right.

_-I know, Omar. I promise I'll try._

They were silent for a long time. Ander leaned his head against Omar's chest, listening to the rhythmic beat of his heart; while Omar played idly with his earring and occasionally ran his fingers through his incipient curls.

They stayed that way for a long time until Ander remembered the hospital scene and the way Omar's face had lit up when he met his niece.

_-Omar?_

_-Hmm?_

_\- Would you like to have children someday?_

_-What?_ -He asked, surprised, looking for Ander's gaze.

Ander turned to see him, shrugging as he smiled at Omar's amazed face.

_-It's just that you looked delighted at the hospital today. And I was curious to know if you ever imagined it._

Omar smiled. While weighting Ander’s question.

_-Maybe when Baba was bent on married me with some Muslim girl, I imagined having children, but it wasn't something I was excited about if I'm honest; and what about you?_

_-I've never thought about it. I think it will be many years before I can think about it._

_-I see... Well, yeah, I agree with you._ –Omar replied, giving him a kiss on the hair.

And with that thought circling his head, Ander smiled at him and lay in his arms.

_\- Sleep, babe. It's late_. –Omar murmured, before turning off the light.

*******


	2. I feel it coming

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I hope you're doing fine!  
> Here is chapter 2. I hope you enjoy it.  
> As always, I'd love to read your comments about it!.  
> Thanks for your kudos as well.  
> Ps.The photos I used in this chapter, I found on @artsbyfelix 's Instagram profile, and I loved them.  
> xoxo

**_Chapter 2. I feel it coming_ **

_Three months later_

****

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_-Agh! Five more minutes!_ -He murmured, deferring the alarm on his mobile, putting his head back on the pillow. It seemed that five seconds had passed, instead of five minutes when the alarm clock beeped again. He grunted and resigned as he pushed aside the cozy blanket that covered him. He rubbed his eyelids with both hands, and with a yawn, he sat up, stretching his arms.

He opened the drawer of the nightstand and looked at the medicine boxes that were stacked inside. " _One, two, and three..."_ –He mentally counted and took the three pills of different sizes and colors to his mouth, and then took a large sip of water.

That was his daily routine since he had gone into remission. According to the doctors, he was currently in a maintenance stage, so it was crucial to take oral medications to prevent a relapse, and thereby " _ensure"_ a complete remission.

He remembered Dr. Ávalos' words as if it were yesterday, explaining that at least two years must pass before suspending the medications.

_"We need to make sure that the remission is complete, which means that during the follow-up program that will consist of physical examinations, blood tests, and diagnostic imaging tests, the presence of leukemic cells in the bone marrow shouldn't be observed..."_

_"Two years?"_ -He had interrupted her at the time, feeling overwhelmed.

_"I understand that it may seem too much time, Ander, but it's vital to stick to the plan if we want to avoid a relapse."_

It wasn't the fact he must take those drugs for two long years that fucked him up during his darkest days, but something, apparently as harmless as that, affected his daily life. Because if he thought about it carefully, it was a constant reminder that death was still hanging around and despite he had mocked her once, he was far from being a guy like any other.

When he wanted to spend the night with Omar, he had to bring the pills with himself; or he couldn't drink as he would like, because there was a high risk that alcohol would inhibit the effect of the medications.

Ander knew that he shouldn't think that way; on the contrary, he should be grateful, but sometimes when the pressure overflowed him like now, he felt as he wasn't able to keep smiling and act as if nothing happened.

_-Fuck!_ -He exhaled, forcing himself to push those thoughts from his mind as he walked straight to the shower.

The next week, he had his first check-up scheduled, and he knew that was the main reason that made him feel that way. He was scared. And even though he felt physically good, he couldn't help but think about the possibility that this damn illness could return without warning.

_"Stop thinking that shit... everything will be fine."_ -He mentally scolded himself, getting out of the shower.

When Ander went down to have breakfast, he was feeling a little calmer. His mother was sitting at the table, drinking coffee, and as soon as she saw him, she put a plate of toasts in front of him. They chatted for a while about trivial stuff, until it was time to go. During the way to school, his mother shared she had received excellent feedback from Omar.

_-Teachers have told me he is almost as brilliant as Nadia. –She confessed, pleased._

Hearing her, he couldn't help but smile. The feeling of pride that invaded him took him by surprise. And even more so because he knew the effort that Omar was making not to disappoint his mother.

_"I want to make the most of this opportunity, you know?"_ –Omar had told him long ago. " _So I decided to cut my shifts at the bar. I need to have enough time to focus on my studies."_

So, for Ander what Omar was achieving had double merit, since he knew that he was struggling to cover the rent of the apartment where he lived.

_"Omar, I've already told you. You could come back to my house so you wouldn't feel pressured to pay the rent."_

_"I really appreciate it, Ander, but I think it wouldn't be a wise decision for our relationship. We spent many hours together, both at school and on weekends… I think the healthiest thing for both of us is to live in different places."_

_"Are you getting sick of me?"_ –He had asked him point-blank, unable to contain himself.

_"What are you saying, dumbie? Of course not. It's easier for you to get bored of me than for me to get bored of you. It's just that…"_

_"Yeah, yeah, I get it..."_ -He had said a little hurt, ending the conversation.

When his mother parked the van, they said goodbye. She made her way to her office, and Ander headed for his first class. Maybe Omar was right, but it bothered him that he couldn't wake up next to him every day.

_-Ander, how are you, dude?_ –Pablo ran into Ander when he was in front of his locker.

Pablo was one of the guys who Ander had known this course since, except for Omar, Guzmán, Rebe, and Samu, the rest were new faces. He was a nice guy, one of those who always had a smile on his face and who belonged to the popular guys' group.

_-Hey! What's up, Pablo?_ -Ander smiled at him. A loud " _plop"_ was heard as he clasped his hand with the newcomer's to greet him.

Pablo waited for him to finish putting away some books, and then they both went to English class. As they walked side by side, Pablo said to him:

_-It's a shame we're in the exams period, dude, otherwise, I would suggest we ditch classes!_

Ander shrugged his shoulders in false resignation as he entered the classroom and glimpsed Omar, who was sitting with his back to the door, talking animatedly with Rebe.

_-Wouldn't it be cool?_ –Ander answered, playing along.

There was a free seat next to Omar, but remembering what Omar had said to him about spending a lot of time together, he decided to give him some space, and therefore, he took a seat at one of the desks in the opposite row where Omar was. Almost immediately, Pablo plopped next to him and continued with his spiel:

_-Unless, because you're the principal's son, you would chicken out because at home she could mess you up!_

_-Nooo, way! On the contrary, that would be more exciting_. –He answered, laughing.

_-I find it fucking great, boy! We'll leave it for when the exams are over then. Oh, and by the way, that reminds me... could you help me with maths? I don't understand shit, and I'd hate to flunk out. And, since it seems to me, you're a genius with numbers... I thought you could help me._

The truth was that mathematics was one of the few subjects that he was good at, and even though Pablo spoke more than he would have wished, he liked the boy, so without hesitation, he agreed.

_-Of course, no problem._

Pablo smirked and tapped him on the shoulder, whistled so sharp that he made the rest of his classmates turn to see them.

Undeterred at all by some annoyed glances, Pablo put his arm around Ander's neck bringing him closer to him, and gently bumping his head with Ander's, he said, raising his voice:

_-How cool! Thanks, dude! Shall we meet after school, then?_

At that moment, the English teacher entered, and the entire group was silent, including Pablo. Because Ander was chatting with his partner, he hadn't given him time to approach Omar to greet him, so he turned to where his boyfriend was, and when their eyes met, he smiled at him while making a slight movement with his head.

Omar looked at him and, imitating the movement, returned the smile, but after a moment, he looked away to focus on the professor's instructions, and from then on, he didn't look at him again. As Ander observed the exam sheet, he felt annoyed at how fleeting Omar's smile had been.

He hadn't even answered two questions, when unable to concentrate on it, he took out his mobile and being careful so the teacher wouldn't notice him, he sent a message to Omar.

**_< Hey! How r u? 😘😈>_ **

Ander pressed send and waited. Omar placed a hand to his pants and watched him pull out his cell phone. He read his message, but instead of answering him, he put it back in his pocket and looking at him, he shook his head while moving his lips forming the phrase: " _Not now,"_ and immediately, he continued to answer the exam.

Sulking at Omar's response, Ander looked back at the sheet of paper in front of him, and resigned, continued to solve the exam as well.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

****

_Ten minutes before_

He was sitting across from Rebecca, listening to her complain about the birthday party her mother had arranged for her without her consent when suddenly, Ander's characteristic laugh made him turn towards the door.

That day, he and Ander turned six months since they came back together, and Omar had prepared a romantic afternoon to celebrate. It amused him to discuss the matter with Ander since his boyfriend didn't agree with the way Omar accounted for the time.

_"And what about the almost two years we were together?"_ -He had complained grimacing, the day Omar had woken him up, bringing breakfast on a tray, for turning a month together.

_"Well, that was left behind. We're starting over, and I hope this time we will exceed the previous record."_ –Omar had joked, watching with amusement how Ander rolled his eyes at his twisted logic.

He pushed that memory away from his mind when he saw him cross the door, accompanied by Pablo. He mumbled a slight growl and returned his attention to what Rebe was saying. He'd talk to Ander later to tell him about the surprise he had in store for him.

_-Sometimes she's a pain in the ass, Omar! I'm telling you; it seems that she enjoys embarrassing me. She says she does it for me, to make new friends... as if I care!_

Since a few weeks ago, Omar had noticed that Pablo was looking for any excuse to approach Ander, but behaving like a jealous boyfriend was something that didn't go with him, so he had decided not to give importance to the matter. He looked at them askance once more and then smiled at Rebecca, somewhat embarrassed because he had lost the thread of the conversation.

_-Hey, gayboy! Did you hear anything of what I told you this last minute?_ –And looking where Ander and Pablo were, she shook her head saying with that characteristic tone of her:

_-I can see that you didn't. Well, if I were you, I would behave the same... Apparently, that pimp is hitting on your boyfriend._

_-You're crazy, Rebe._

She shrugged her shoulders and said:

_-Don't say I didn't tell you; I'm sure Pablito is crazy about your man. I mean... I don't blame him; Ander is so hot that he turns me on, too._

Omar laughed out loud at his friend's boldness, but deep down, he thought she was right. At that moment, the English teacher entered, and both he and Rebe settled into their seats.

By the time he answered the last question, the room was practically empty. Almost all of his classmates had finished, including Ander. English was the most challenging subject for him, so he wasn't surprised to see that he was one of the last ones. He took his backpack and handing over the test, left the classroom.

Ander was leaning against the wall to one side of the classroom, waiting for him. When their eyes met, Omar saw Ander's face light up, showing a white smile. " _Fuck! How handsome you are…"_ –Omar thought, still looking at him.

_-Hey... how did it go?_ –And getting closer to him, Ander kissed him on the lips.

Omar kissed him back, then made an uncertain gesture at his question.

_-You know English is not my thing, but I hope to pass the exam. Hey, by the way, I'll be waiting for you at my flat this afternoon. So you can help me with English and also with other things... –he smiled, raising his eyebrows so that Ander understood what he was referring to._

_-This afternoon?_ -He asked, undecided.

_-Yep, this afternoon. Or do you have a better plan?_ -He joked.

Omar had decided not to remind him they turned six months today since he wanted to surprise him with a romantic dinner. Before they broke up, they had only celebrated their first anniversary and their respective birthdays, but nothing else. So this time, he wanted to do it differently. Since Ander had beaten cancer, any reason was good enough to celebrate life, and he wanted to prove it to him.

_-I'm sorry, Omar, but I agreed with Pablo to help him with maths this afternoon. Can we leave it for tomorrow?_ -Ander asked, winking at him.

Trying to put aside the jealousy that suddenly invaded him, Omar smiled at him and gave him a brief kiss on the lips.

_-Of course, babe, don't worry. Let's change our clothes; we have P.E. the next hour._

As they walked to the locker room, he remembered Rebe's words and couldn't help but feel a chill run down his spine. Omar knew that the jealousy he was feeling was unwarranted since he was sure of Ander's love, but he was pissed off because Ander had forgotten that today was a special day for them.

He was finishing changing his clothes when Ander approached, sitting next to him on the wooden bench.

_-Hey, I was thinking… Are you sure it doesn't bother you? Because I could tell him that..._

-Not at all. Go with him. Seriously, nothing happens. –And raising an eyebrow, he couldn't help saying:

_-If all that he wants is for you to help him with maths, I've no problem._

_-What do you say?_ -He looked puzzled, apparently without understanding what he was referring to.

_-Nothing, don't listen to me._

Suddenly, Ander began to laugh as he understood the situation.

_-Haha! Are you jealous of Pablo, Omar?_

_-Jealous? Of course not... I'm just saying maybe that asshole is looking for something more than studying._

Ander looked at him and shook his head as he smiled mischievously.

_-Although I'm flattered to see you jealous, you know you have nothing to worry about, right? He's a friend, Omar, nothing more._

_-You're right, babe, forget what I told you. –And giving Ander a quick kiss, he finished adjusting his sneakers shoelaces._

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

He turned the key in the lock and pushed the door. The smell of some kind of stew emanating from the kitchen was the sign that his mother was already home.

_-Hi! I'm home, mom!_ –He greeted as he motioned for Pablo to come in.

_-Hello, Ander! I'm here._ -He heard her shout, and seconds later, she appeared in front of them with a kitchen rag in her hands.

_-Oh! Hi, Pablo, I didn't know you were coming with Ander. Sorry for the outfit._ -She pointed to her clothing.

Instead of the usual clothes she used to wear to go to school, she was dressed in a blue cotton shirt, jeans, and tennis shoes. And, on top of her clothes, she was wearing an apron.

_-Oh! Don't worry, Mrs... I mean... Professor… –_ Pablo smiled ashamed.

Hearing him, Ander rolled his eyes and interrupted Pablo by saying:

_-Mom, We're going to study._ We'll _be in my room._

Azucena nodded, outlining a smile, and Ander and Pablo headed towards the stairs, so Ander didn't see the surprised face his mother had put on.

_-This is fucking weird!_ -Pablo confided to him as he dropped his backpack on the bed.

_-Why?_

_-Well, your mother is the principal... Still dressed in jeans, she imposes, man. I think that at any moment, she will enter and scold us._

_-What are you saying, dude? She is super cool._

_-Okay... if you say so. Hey, does she know about you_? -He asked with a smirk.

_-What do you mean?_

_-Well... everyone at school knows that you are involved with Omar, but the fact that your mother is the principal... That could be a problem for you, couldn't be?_

Hearing him, Ander decided to ignore his question, and instead mumbled:

_-Come on; let's study if you want to pass the exam._

He saw Pablo let out a sigh, and sitting on the bed, took out his notebooks.

For the next half hour, Ander spent his time trying to explain Newton's binomial, but it was clear that Pablo didn't understand anything at all. And coupled with the fact that on more than one occasion, Ander had caught him distracted, it made the task even more difficult.

_-Come on, Pablo! If you don't pay attention, you won't pass.._ -Ander complained, seeing him distracted again.

_-Okay, okay, man... I get it. It's just this is so difficult. What if we take a break? We could have a beer in the meantime._

Ander hesitated for a moment but eventually agreed.

_-Okay, but only one. Otherwise, we'll definitely not move forward. I'm going for them; I'll be right back._

When he entered the room with both beers in hand, he saw Pablo looking at the pic where he and Omar were hugging each other.

He cleared his throat, so Pablo was aware of his presence, and when he turned around, Ander handed him the bottle.

_-To the eyes!_ –Pablo exclaimed, clinking his beer against Ander's. Then, he took a big sip.

Ander did the same, sitting down on the bed next to Pablo.

_-And what are you going to do now that you graduate?_ –Pablo asked curiously.

_-Pfff... I don't know. For that, a lot is still missing._

_-A lot, you say? Ha!_ -He mocked. _–Five months to be exact._

Although Ander smiled at him, he felt a twinge in the stomach when he remembered that in a few days, he had an appointment in the hospital for his first check-up after the remission. " _What if something bad happened?"_

Quickly, he forced himself to push those thoughts away and asked:

_-And you already know what are you going to do?_

_-Yeah. I'll go to London to study Business. Of course, if everything goes well and I manage to pass all the subjects..._ -He concluded, grimacing as he pointed to his notebook.

Ander gave a kind of growl, and finishing the last sip of his beer, pointed towards the trash can try to make a basket. When the bottle bounced off and into the garbage, Pablo tapped him on the back.

He didn't know at what moment it happened. But before he knew it, the hand that had patted his back was now sliding along his left side, and when he turned his head to see what was going on, Pablo closed the gap between them and kissed him.

It was only a few seconds in which Ander felt those clumsy lips trying to deepen the kiss, but it was so surprising for him, that for a moment he didn't know how to react.

_-Hey! What the fuck are you doing, man?_ -He asked, standing up.

Pablo imitated him and grabbing him from the shirt, murmured:

_-I like you... a lot._

_-You're wrong. Let me go_. -He replied, releasing from Pablo's grip.

_-Ander..._ -he insisted, trying to kiss him again.

_-I said no. You better go_. –Ander rejected him, putting a hand on Pablo's chest to prevent him from coming closer.

_-If it's for Omar, I'm not going to say anything, Ander._

Ander released the air and said emphatically:

_-Omar is my boyfriend, Pablo. And I'm not going to cheat on him._

_-But man… I'm much more handsome than him._

There was no doubt that Pablo was a complete asshole, and Ander had no intention of discussing Omar with him. Instead, each word he spoke only made him pissed off even more. So, taking a couple of steps back, he ordered:

_-Get out of my sight!_

_-But..._ -Pablo muttered, visibly upset.

_-Get lost!_ -He interrupted him, turning his back on him.

When he heard the door close, Ander cursed.

_-Fuuck!_

He was annoyed with himself for being so naive and not realizing Pablo's intention before.

_-Damn! Omar was right..._ -He muttered under his breath.

As soon as he pronounced Omar's name, he felt awful. Not because of the kiss, but because Omar had warned him about Pablo, and instead of listening to him, he had mocked, saying that Omar was jealous.

Releasing another curse, he looked at his watch. He grabbed his cell phone, put on a hoodie, and left the room.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

****

He was in his bedroom watching a " _Game of Thrones"_ episode when he heard the front door open.

_-What the fuck…?_ –He mumbled while pressing pause.

He looked at the clock. It was around seven in the afternoon. Ander was the only one who had a key to his flat, and he was supposed to be with Pablo at that time, so he shouted getting up from the bed:

_-Ander? Is it you?_

_-Hello..._ -Ander greeted him, with a kind of worried gesture.

_-What are you doing here?_ -He asked, puzzled.

He had given up on the idea to spend a romantic afternoon with Ander, so his surprise was huge when he saw Ander standing in front of him. And even more, because Ander had a strange expression.

_-Is everything alright? What happened?_

Ander didn't reply immediately. Instead, he walked to where he was and cradled his face in his hands.

_-I love you. You know it, right?_

Omar grazed his lips with Ander's, and then showed a big smile.

_-Did you finally remember? Is that why you came?_ –He asked enthusiastically. But when Ander made a gesture of not understanding what he was referring to, he stated:

_-You have no idea what I'm talking about, right?_

And he continued:

- _Today we celebrated six months together. But you didn't come for that. What's going on?_

Ander raised both hands to his face while whispering:

_-Fuck! Forgive me, Omar... I forgot._

_-Yes, I've already realized... Seriously, it doesn't matter, babe. So... you canceled your afternoon of Maths teacher to be with me because...?_

Ander blew out a breath and dropped onto the bed as he spread his arms to wrap Omar with them. Seeing him, Omar approached him and allowed himself to be embraced.

Seconds later, he heard Ander murmur against his hair:

_-You were right, Omar. Pablo wanted more than just learning maths..._

As soon as he heard that statement, Omar sat up so he could look him in the face.

_-What?_

_-What I have told you._ –Ander answered reluctantly.

_-Aha, What?_ -He insisted, feeling his heartbeat rapidly against his chest.

Ander looked at him for a few seconds and then looked away.

_-He kissed me. He said he likes me._

Omar felt as if Ander had hit him in the belly because, for a moment, he was out of air. When he was finally able to process what Ander had just confessed to him, he couldn't say anything other than:

_-I told you! That son of a bitch! But what happened? What did he say?_ -He kept asking question after question without stopping.

_-Omar, Omar... calm down and listen to me! Nothing happened, except what I told you. We were talking, and suddenly he kissed me like that out of nowhere. I told him that I was with you and that I wanted him to leave._

As Omar listened to him, he forced himself to calm down until he was finally able to control the rhythm of his breathing. The next thing Ander said took him by surprise:

_-Hey, could you hug me?_ -He asked, taking him by the chin.

For a few seconds, Omar didn't move, unsure of what to do next.

_-Omar... come._ -Ander pulled him to wrap his arms around him. Once Ander hugged him, he felt him squeeze him tightly while saying in a lower voice:

_-Are you angry?_

But Omar didn't have enough time to answer him since almost immediately, Ander spoke again.

_-It doesn't matter, really. I don't want you to get mad. You are who I want to be with. It's just that it bothers me that I didn't listen to you before._

Omar closed his eyes when he heard Ander's confession, and moving away from him a little to see him in the eyes, he replied:

_-Thanks._

_-Why, thank me?_ –Ander asked.

_-For telling me. For loving me._ -He whispered against Ander's lips.

Ander smiled and said in turn:

_-Forever._

Omar felt his heart warm as he heard Ander pronounce that word. He knew that in the future, there would be all kinds of difficulties, but if they held together as they did until now and spoke with the truth, it would be much easier to overcome the obstacles that presented themselves.

_-So what? Do you want to watch a "Game of Thrones" chapter with me?_

Ander rubbed his hands together while laughing excited:

_-Only if you make some popcorn._

_-You bet!_

_-We watched the last chapter of the seventh season when Jon Snow and Daenerys Targaryen..._

Omar interrupted him:

_-Sorry, babe. I already watched that chapter._

_-What? How could you watch it without me?_ -He joked pouting.

_-No problem, we can see it again. And then, we could entertain ourselves on other things, how does that sound to you?_

Ander winked at him and started kissing him. As Omar kissed him back with the same intensity, he thought with amusement that after all, the series could wait an hour more.

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm watching Game of Thrones for the first time because I refused to do it before, and I've to say that I'm crazy about this series. OMG!  
> If you haven't watched it yet, I highly recommend it! ;)


	3. The decisive moment

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I hope you are doing fine in this challenging time we are living in.  
> Chapter three is ready. I hope you have fun reading it the same way I did writing it.  
> As always, I appreciate you take the time to read and/or comment.  
> As you can see, these chapters are a bit longer, so I hope to be able to publish the next one at the end of next week.  
> Until then!  
> xoxo 😘

**_Chapter 3. The decisive moment_ **

_A week later_

****

**_(Omar)_ **

****

_-What about this jacket?_ –He asked, standing in front of the mirror.

When Ander didn't answer him, he looked at him through it and noticed that he looked thoughtful.

_-Ander?_ -He turned to see him.

_-What?_ -He replied absentmindedly, looking up at him.

_-I asked you if I wear this jacket._ -He pointed, bringing both arms to the cotton garment. _-I believe this would be fine to have dinner with my parents. What do you think?_

Ander got up from bed and walked towards him. He wrapped his arms around Omar's neck and pulled him until his forehead touched his.

_-This color suits you very well. You are a handsome man, did you know that?_ -Ander looked up at him, slightly curling his lips into a budding smile.

_-Mmm... Yep. That's what I've been told before._ -He joked.

_-Oh yeah?_ -He raised his eyebrow, enjoying with Omar's game.

Omar laughed and then caught him by the chin.

_-What happens?_ -He asked, intrigued.

_-Nothing at all, why?_

_-I know you, something's wrong with you. What is it?_ –He insisted.

Ander smiled briefly and then added:

_-Well, I'm a little nervous about this dinner with your parents..._

_-Everything will be fine, I'm sure. Besides, Nadia and Guzmán will be there keeping us company, and that will make my parents not pay much attention to us since they will be devoted to pampering Marina._

He saw Ander raise an eyebrow in disbelief and then heard him murmur:

_-If you say so…_

_-Hey,_ -he tugged at Ander's shirt to brush his lips _-thanks. I really appreciate what you do because this means a lot to me. And I just want you to know that I will be by your side all the time and if at any point my parents make you feel uncomfortable, we will leave, okay?_ –He concluded with a smile.

_-Okay._

_-Also, tonight is Rebe's party, so after the torture, we'll go to get drunk and dance all night..._

_-Well..._ -Ander smiled briefly, _-you will get drunk, and I will take care of you._

As soon as Ander corrected him, Omar realized his mistake, so he immediately tried to apologize.

_-I'm sorry, nene. I forgot you can't drink._

_-Calm down. That's the way it is, and there's nothing to apologize for. Besides, it won't always be like that, will it?_

_-Of course, you're right._ –He stated, hugging him.

With Ander between his arms, he looked in the mirror and tried to smile. He was nervous too but didn't want to show it to his boyfriend. It was the first time that he and Ander would share more than five minutes with his family, and he hoped that his parents wouldn't make them uncomfortable in any way.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

Omar smiled at him once more, and seconds later, knocked on the door. As much as his boyfriend tried to act normal, it was evident that he was more nervous than he really wanted to admit, and he was right, since sharing the table with Omar's parents would be quite a challenge. Although, if he was honest with himself, that was the last of his concerns.

He had lied to Omar, saying that he was nervous about dinner with his parents because he didn't want to worry him tonight. Ander knew since a couple of weeks ago they had organized this dinner and was aware of how important it was for Omar, so he would speak to him once they returned from Rebe's party.

The door opened, and it was Omar's father who received them. He looked at them for a few seconds, as if trying to remind himself that he had accepted that his son had a relationship with a man and that he should support him.

_-Omar..._ -He mumbled, then turned his gaze to him. _-Hello boy. Come in, Nadia and her husband, have not yet arrived._

Ander shook his hand in response to the greeting, and as they walked down the hall, he thought with amusement at the deliberate omission Omar's father had made in saying neither his name nor Guzmán's.

The smell of meat mixed with spices, flooded his nostrils, whetting his appetite. Almost immediately, he saw Omar's mother appear, who as soon as she saw them, her gaze softened.

_-Omar, son. It's good to see both of you._ –Omar immediately approached her to hug her and kiss her on the cheek.

_Hello. Ander, right?_ -She greeted him, extending her hand while still smiling.

_-Thanks for the invitation._ –Ander thanked, looking first at the mother and then at Omar's father.

Yusef nodded slightly, and Omar's mother quickly invited them to sit down.

_-Nadia, Guzmán, and the baby shouldn't take long._

Ander could feel how tense Omar was even if he tried to hide it. At first, Omar's father didn't speak, he just looked at them and listened to his wife, who wanted to fill that awkward silence by talking about any subject, but as the minutes passed, Ander realized how Yusef was relaxing.

At that moment, there was a knock on the door, and Omar's father, addressing his son, asked him to open it.

_-I'm sure it's Nadia. Omar, open the door, please._

Ander saw how Omar hesitated to leave him alone with his parents, so he turned to Omar and smiled at him to reassure him.

When they were alone, he heard Yusef say:

_-Omar told us that you were ill._

Feeling surprised because of the comment, he hesitated for a moment before explaining.

_-There were rough months, but now I'm in remission. In fact, in a few days, I will have my first check-up._

He saw Omar's mother make a sad gesture when he heard him, and Yusef, clearing his throat, said:

_-We're happy to hear that you are fine now, and you'll see that everything will go perfectly, Ander._

_-Thank you._ –He mumbled. _“Hey, finally he said my name”_ –He thought amusement.

Then, Omar's mother looked at him:

_-We know how important you are to Omar, and if you are the happiness of our son, we are happy that you are part of his life._

He didn't have time to answer since, at that moment, Guzmán, Omar, and Nadia entered, holding the little Marina in her arms; however, he was incredibly moved to hear them speak like this.

From then on, just as Omar had predicted, the grandparents only had eyes for the baby. Dinner went smoothly, and little by little, both he and Omar relaxed. In the end, Omar would joke around and pamper the baby as well. A couple of hours later, they said goodbye.

_-Thanks for dinner, I'm glad we gathered. Ander and I have to go. Rebe throws a party at her house because of her birthday._ –Omar explained as he stood up.

Omar's mother nodded and, addressing Nadia and Guzmán, asked:

_-Won't you go to the party?_

_-No, Mama_. –Nadia smiled as she kissed her daughter on the temple.

_-We're going home._ –Guzmán intervened while looking at Marina.

Before answering, the mother looked at her husband, and when she saw him nod, she proposed:

_-We could take care of her, and so you could go too. We'd be delighted to have our granddaughter tonight, wouldn't we, Yusef?_

Omar's father smiled as he raised his arms to the baby to hold her.

_-Of course, take the night off and join Omar and Ander._

Guzmán and Nadia looked at each other for a moment, weighing the proposal and finally agreed happily.

_-Okay, thanks._ –Guzmán smiled, getting up too.

While Omar and Nadia were saying goodbye to their parents, Guzmán approached Ander and asked in a low voice:

_-Have you talked to Omar?_

He shook his head before muttering:

_-I'll do it tonight._ –And when he said it, he felt a leap in his heart.

Guzmán nodded, putting an arm around Ander's shoulders.

_-What are you two planning?_ –Omar asked, appearing suddenly.

_-Nothing. Why?_ –Ander replied and immediately added:

_-Shall we go?_

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

The party was at its peak when all four arrived. Rebe greeted them with a beer in hand as she moved to the beat of the music.

_-Rebe... what's up?_ –Ander greeted.

_-Hello... hot man! You're more handsome every day, aren't you? I thought all of you weren't coming._

_-How could we miss it, Rebe? It’s your birthday party!_ –Omar greeted her, hugging her.

_-Well, even brought the pharaoh and Guzmán! That really is a surprise. Well, come on, let's have fun. Samu and the others have already arrived._

A while later, Omar and Samuel were sitting on one of the luxurious sofas, chatting and drinking a beer. Omar told him about the dinner they had had with his parents and how everything had turned out better than he had expected.

_-I'm telling you, Samu, at first I thought it had been a mistake, but luckily I was wrong. My parents were so lovely to Ander that I'm freaking out, man; I really can't believe it yet._

_-That's good news, macho. Let's cheer to that! And Ander, where is he?_

Omar glanced to see if he could find Ander among the group of people dancing and singing in the middle of the room but couldn't find him. Almost as soon as they arrived, Ander had given him a quick kiss and had murmured an _"I'll be right back,"_ but that had already happened... Omar looked at his watch and snorted: forty minutes.

_-I don't know, Samu, he must be around over there._

He took his cell phone and sent him a message:

_**< Where r u? 😒😡>** _

When Nadia and Guzmán approached a while later, Omar was already on his third drink, and Ander hadn't even read his message. So he couldn't help but feel pissed off that he'd disappeared like that, in the middle of the party.

_-_ _Haven't you seen Ander?_

_-We saw him a while ago, but then we lost sight of him._ –His sister answered, hugging Guzmán.

Omar nodded and, in one gulp, finished the contents of his glass.

_-I'll be right back... I'm going for something to drink._ –And without waiting for an answer, he stood up and began to push his way through the crowd.

It didn't take long for him to find what he was looking for. When he went downstairs, he saw him through the large glass window. Ander had taken off his clothes, leaving only the underpants and floated face up in the middle of the pool.

His eyes were closed, and he only moved his arms from time to time to stay afloat. For several minutes Omar stood watching him. Ander looked so handsome but also so sad. Despite the distance, he could see him with a frown like when something worried him.

He was debating whether to go with him or leave him alone, but at that moment, someone else entered the pool. It was Pablo. Due to the glass, Omar couldn't hear what they were saying, he only saw Ander turn towards him and exchange some words.

He wasn't amused that Pablo was looking for Ander, but he knew that he had to leave since it wasn't right for him to spy on his boyfriend. Whatever was going on, he was sure Ander would tell him later. But then, _why didn't his feet obey him? Why didn't he turn around and go back with his friends?_

He watched as Pablo took off his shoes and socks, and rolling up his pants, sat down on the shore to put his feet in the water, leaving the glass of whatever he was drinking beside him.

Far from leaving, Omar took a couple of steps aside to avoid being seen. Seconds later, he saw Ander approaching where Pablo was, and thanks to the strength of his arms, Ander pushed himself and sat next to him, splashing Pablo in the process, so they both laughed.

After a few minutes, while they were still talking, he saw Pablo holding out his glass and Ander accepting it to take a sip. When Ander returned the glass, he saw his boyfriend smile at Pablo and couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy.

_"What if things between them hadn't been as Ander had told him?"_ –He thought suddenly. Although his brain told him that Ander wouldn't lie to him, seeing them like this, with so much camaraderie, made him hesitate. _"What was he doing talking to Pablo after what he had said had happened between them?"_

It seemed like the alcohol wasn't making him think straight, and he wasn't comfortable peeking like a jealous boyfriend either, so he looked at them one more time and turned his back on them, walked out of there.

_-Hey! What's wrong with you, Omar?_ –Lu asked when Omar collided with her.

_-I'm sorry, Lu, I didn't see you_. -He apologized, running his hand through his hair.

_-Yes, I've already noticed. What's wrong?_

_-Nothing... I need a drink. Will you come with me?_

The next half hour, he was drinking with Lu and Valerio, trying not to think about Ander. He listened to his friends talk and only intervened with monologues, as he turned every five minutes towards the stairs that led to the pool.

_-Omar? What do you think?_ -Lu asked him, crashing her shoulder against his.

_-Nothing, Lu, why?_

_-Because it seems that you have seen a dead man. You're here, but you're not here... You know what I mean? And by the way, where did you leave Ander?_

_-Eh... Ander?_ _He must be dancing somewhere._ –Omar lied.

Lu and Valerio looked at each other and nodded. At that moment, Rebe came dancing and hugged Omar.

_-Come on, let's have some tequila shots! This is a party, not a fucking funeral._ -Rebe exclaimed, looking at Lu. In response, Lu rolled her eyes and turned around, leaving them alone.

Five minutes later, Ander appeared in front of them. He had damp hair and a smile on his face.

_-Hello, gorgeous! Where have you been, huh?_ –Rebe asked while looking askance at Omar.

_-I'm sorry, Rebe, but I saw your pool, and I couldn't resist it._ –He explained, sitting on the arm of the chair where Omar was leaning.

_-So, while we were at the party, you were swimming, man. Really?_ -Valerio asked, surprised _. -How boring you are becoming!_

Omar just smiled and took a sip of his beer.

_-Well come on, let's go dance, Valerio!_ –Rebe shouted, pulling Valerio by the arm to drag him onto the dance floor that her mother had improvised.

When they were alone, Omar looked at Ander.

_-Is everything all right, nene?_

Ander smiled, nodding, running his hand across the back of Omar's neck.

_-Yep, forgive me for leaving you so much time alone, but I wanted to get away from the noise, and when I saw the pool, I didn't think twice._

_-I see…_ -He replied, feeling slightly disappointed that Ander hadn't told him that he had been talking to Pablo.

Omar took a glass of tequila from the tray of a waiter who was walking around and drank it in one gulp. When he put it back on the shelf, he felt Ander's chin rest against his shoulder.

_-Omar, I feel a little tired, can we go?_

Hearing him, he turned on the couch to face him.

_-Now?_ -He asked, feeling slightly dizzy.

_-Please?_ -Ander insisted, kissing him on the lips.

Omar nodded while blowing the air slowly. _-Okay,_ -he murmured.

_-Or if you prefer, you can stay, and I'll see you later._

Hearing Ander's suggestion, he hesitated. He didn't want to argue with Ander, but right now, he was starting to feel a little pissed off, and maybe it would be better not to go with him. That way, he could calm down, and when he felt calmer, he could talk to him. He wanted to ask him about Pablo.

_-Okay... I'd prefer to. I feel like staying a while longer. You bring your keys, don't you?_

It was only an instant, but he saw that his response had surprised Ander, yet he recovered himself almost immediately and smiled at him.

_-Yes, I've got the keys. I'll see you later then._ –And kissing him on the cheek, he got up and went to the exit.

An hour later, Omar arrived at his apartment. He had continued drinking, but he wasn't as drunk as he would have liked. He opened the door and went straight to the room.

Ander had left the bathroom door ajar and the light on, causing a thin edge of the light illuminated part of the room.

Ander was lying on his side and breathing evenly. His lips were slightly parted, and he had a pillow between his arms. Omar entered the bathroom and undressed, leaving only his underwear. He brushed his face and teeth, and leaving the light on, returned to the room.

Omar lay down beside him and continued watching him. He loved him so badly that it hurt. Now he knew that what he had screwed him up a while before was not the fact that Ander had been talking to that guy, or that he hadn't told him anything about it, what has really fucked him up was the fear of losing him. The thought that there were so many _"Pablos"_ in the world and the possibility that some of them might not be indifferent to Ander, frightened him.

_-Fuck! –_ He hissed, feeling depressed. Suddenly, he needed to feel Ander, so he came closer to him and kissed him. He didn't want to think about the possibility of not being with Ander.

That caress was enough for Ander to wake up. He opened his eyes and closed them again, trying to focus him. He looked sleepy; however, he smiled at Omar and with a hoarse voice whispered:

_-Hey... You are here. How was it?_

_-It was okay, but I got bored of being alone and decided to come back. I wanted to be with you ... The truth, I missed you._ –Omar confessed, kissing him again.

When he pulled away from Ander, he saw him smile. It was a cocky smile that promised an unspoken pleasure.

_-Mmm... I like to hear that._ -Ander whispered against his mouth.

He dropped onto his back on the bed when he saw Ander get up to take off his shirt, and seconds later, he slowly took off his underpants to be completely naked.

Seeing Ander standing in front of him, he unconsciously ran his tongue over his lips while admiring him for a while. The well-defined torso, with those two small tattoos in the shape of a sun and moon very close to his left clavicle, matching the rest of the moles distributed on his body, drove him crazy.

Narrow hips with hard thighs and a firm erection completed the magnificent sight. Ander brought his right hand up to his cock and began to rub it up and down as he looked at him.

_"Damn, you're perfect!"_ -Omar thought as he felt his body begin to react, getting hard just by looking at him.

_Now it’s your turn..._ -Ander whispered hoarsely, still looking at him.

He didn't have to say it twice. Omar sat up on the bed to take off his undershirt, and when he was going to do the same with the underpants, Ander approached him and getting down on his knees; he took the thin fabric and pulled it.

Ander went down slowly, and without saying another word, he brought his lips to Omar's erection and began to kiss him. Slowly he ran his tongue along its entire length and then gently bit the tip of Omar's cock.

Omar's body trembled, and he gasped when a second later, Ander began to suck harder. He didn't know if he felt so horny due to the effect of the alcohol or if it was because of seeing the desire reflected in Ander's eyes, but his heart was pounding so hard he was sure Ander could hear it.

Omar wanted to tell him how horny he turned on, but the words stuck in his throat as he felt Ander's hands gripping his thighs. Helped by his elbows, Omar sat up a little to see his boyfriend giving him pleasure. It was so morbid to see Ander focused on the task, that Omar bit his lips in response.

Then Ander stopped and lay on top of him. The sensation of feeling his cock rubbing against Ander’s made Omar move against him in an attempt to make him feel how much he needed him. Their bodies were joined from hips to thighs, and Ander took advantage of that position to lean over him and take a bite out of his earlobe before running his tongue over it and gently blowing.

Omar shuddered and flinched at the feeling. He was willing to anything Ander wished. He couldn't think clearly, and all he wanted was to enjoy his boyfriend's expert caresses. Ander kissed him on the lips and stuck his tongue in. Omar arched against him, moaning against his mouth as he felt desire consuming him. He pressed his fingers into Ander's back as he clung to him, kissing him back, delighting in his taste. They were both gasping for breath, but still, he managed to mutter:

_-Ander, please..._

Ander looked at him, and with a smile stamped on his lips, he began to lick his neck, and then suck on Omar's soft skin while nibbling gently. Omar knew that within a few hours, he would have the marks of Ander's kisses on his skin, but far from bothering him, it turned him on. Ander kept running his tongue through Omar's body until he reached down to his cock and jerked it off.

As best he could, Omar turned to the nightstand and pulled out the tube of lube, handing it over to him. There was no need to say anything more. They both knew each other perfectly, and Ander knew what Omar needed; nevertheless, he wanted to hear him.

Omar saw him put a generous amount on his fingertips, and seconds later, he felt one of them enter inside him until reaching that sensitive spot that made him lose his sanity. Almost immediately, he felt a second finger join the first, causing Omar to scream with pleasure.

_-Fuck, Ander!_ -He groaned, lifting his hips to help him go more in-depth.

_-What? Do you want me inside you now? Wait a little longer._ -Ander showed a naughty smile, pulling out his fingers to replace them with his cock. Ander's tip brushed against him but didn't thrust, so Omar grew impatient, moving his hips in a plea.

The pleasure made him shiver, turning into a moldable mass in his hands. Ander moved back over him to clasp his hands and place them together on the pillow.

Omar blinked, stunned by the intensity of Ander's gaze; those brown eyes shone with a tenderness that overwhelmed him. Ander positioned himself between Omar's legs and began to shove inside him inch by inch, slowly, and Omar spread his legs to receive him.

**_(Ander)_ **

As soon as he felt Omar's tightness, he closed his eyes and slowed down, trying to breathe deeply. He was so horny that he knew that if he didn't get himself under control, he would cum right away, and it was the last thing he wanted to happen.

_-Omar, look at me._

Omar did so as he continued to propel himself against Ander's cock to feel it more deeply.

_-Don't you dare... please, don't stop._ -Omar groaned.

Ander saw the agony reflected in Omar's face, so he slowed down to lean over and kiss him. He laced their tongues and licking his swollen lips tenderly.

_-I love you... I love you so much..._ -He whispered against Omar's mouth. Omar had the virtue of making him lose control, so, guided by instinct, shoved to the bottom in a single movement and felt Omar's body tremble and relax to receive him, clenching him tightly and begging for more.

Ander pressed Omar's hands and squeezed them more tightly to the pillow, as he began to push his hips into Omar; slowly at first to allow him to adjust to his rhythm. His body tensed as he felt the orgasm was about to reach him, leaving him breathless.

It was a mix of love, lust, and passion, and he marveled at seeing Omar's features in total surrender. He was convinced that he would never tire of feeling him in this way.

Sweat trickled down his forehead as Omar stroke his cock a couple of times before cumming against Ander's abs. Seeing the desire in Omar's face as he emptied himself, was enough for him to cum as well; emitting a guttural sound as pleasure washed over him entirely as he got cum inside Omar. He had no doubt that Omar was his soulmate.

Ander fell exhausted, resting his cheek on Omar's torso, trying to catch his breath. At the time, he was thinking of nothing to torment him, his head was free of worries, and all he wanted was to treasure the immense happiness he felt. It was a reality that in Omar's arms, he felt safe.

They remained in that position for a few minutes. Once they both recovered, Ander rolled onto the mattress to stand next to Omar, and looking for his arm, asked him:

_-Omar, hug me._

He felt Omar wrap his arms around him and placed a soft kiss on his shoulder.

_-That was incredible, nene._ -He heard him say against his skin.

He took a deep breath and turned to look Omar in the eye. He couldn't keep putting it off. He needed to be honest with Omar and tell him what was happening to him because he had told him this time would be different.

_-Omar..._

_-Yes?_ -He asked in a sleepy voice as he smiled at him.

_-There's something I want to tell you._

_-What happens?_ -He looked at him questioningly.

_-A couple of days ago, after the swimming class, I felt bad._

_-What are you saying?_ –Omar got up, still looking at him.

_-I probably trained too hard, but I got dizzy and... My nose bled... Guzmán helped me, but..._

_-And why didn't you tell me, Ander?_ -He asked, sitting down on the bed.

_-Because I didn't want to worry you. I wanted to tell you, but I decided to wait until dinner with your parents was over. Anyway, in a few days, I have my check-up... it will surely be nothing, but I promised to tell you everything. Will you go with me to the doctor?_

Although he tried to remain calm, fear betrayed him, and his question sounded more like a plea than the unimportant question he had intended it to seem.

_-Of course, I will._ –He answered emphatically, and immediately added:

_-As you said, surely it will be nothing. You look great, but we must make sure, okay?_

_-Thank you._ -He whispered, getting closer to Omar.

_-Don't thank me. I love you, and you can always count on me no matter what. Now we have to sleep._ -He smiled at him before placing a soft kiss in his temple, and seconds later, cradling him in his arms.

Ander closed his eyes and immediately felt the heat radiating from Omar's body, which made him begin to feel his eyelids heavier until finally falling into a deep sleep.

*******

_The day of his check-up_

**_(Omar)_ **

Ander was sitting next to him, resting his elbows on his knees and his hands clasped against his chin. They were waiting for Dr. Ávalos to receive them.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Two days earlier, Omar had accompanied him to do the blood tests and a CT scan. Even though Ander hadn't had nosebleeds again, nor had any other symptoms, Omar felt scared. He couldn't even imagine what would happen with Ander's mood if cancer had appeared yet.

After Ander told him what had happened to him, Omar had never been calm again. He could only think about his boyfriend's health, so when Ander said to him that Pablo had looked for him at the party to apologize, his mind didn't even register it. He had completely forgotten about the matter and now saw it as something so stupid that he only could murmur: _"how cool."_

Now that he looked back, Omar realized he must not be concerned nor feel jealous. Ander loved him and showed it to him all the time. He left those thoughts behind and looked at Ander.

_-Hey,_ -he placed his hand on the back of Ander's neck and approached him. - _Everything will be fine, you'll see._

Ander grimaced at him, trying to sketch a smile and looked back at nothing again.

_-Ander Muñoz?_ –A woman dressed in a nurse's uniform approached.

_-You can come in. Dr. Ávalos is already waiting for you._

Ander looked at him briefly and stood up. Omar smiled at him, trying to instill his support, and then, they both entered into the office.

_-Ander, how have you been?_

_-Fine, I guess._ –He replied dryly, unable to hide his nervousness.

The doctor smiled at him and handed him a robe by saying:

_-Please put it on because I need to examine you._

Omar watched Ander turn pale as he walked to the exploration table. From where Omar was, he could see the doctor examine to Ander. He was so nervous that he started biting his nails, feeling his pulse speed up.

After several minutes, he heard the doctor:

_-Okay, that's all. Get dressed and see you on this side,_ -she said, pointing to her desk.

When Ander reached his side, he sat down and looked at the doctor, who at that moment was looking at her computer screen.

Omar felt Ander hold his hand without taking his eyes off her, so he could only squeeze his hand tighter as they both waited anxiously.

_-Very well..._ -She murmured, taking her eyes off the screen and then looking at them both.

_-Congratulations, Ander. Your laboratory results, as well as the tomography, confirm that there is no presence of leukemic cells in the bone marrow. And together with the physical examination that I just performed, I can tell you that so far, you are perfectly fine._

_-Really? So cancer has not come back?_ -He heard Ander ask as he exhaled with relief.

_-That's right. You're still in remission. You will have to continue with the oral treatment as you've done until now, and I'll see you in six months._ –She concluded with a wide smile.

*******

Once they both left the office, Omar hugged him tightly:

_-Damn! I told you!_ –He exclaimed, feeling the happiest person in the world. Ander hugged him back, wiping away a tear that ran down his cheek.

_-Well, now that I know I'm fine, I can tell you a secret._

_-A secret?_

Ander smiled and nodded:

_-A few months ago I bought a trip for both of us._

_-What are you saying?_ –Omar asked him without believing what Ander had told.

_-Do you remember the first time you gave me the key to your apartment?_

_-Of course._ -He smiled, remembering that moment.

_-The key came with a keychain of a globe..._

Omar nodded.

_-... You turned it around and told me to point the finger, and that would be the first place we'd go together, remember?_ -Ander asked with glassy eyes.

Omar remembered that scene precisely as Ander had described him, but he couldn't believe that Ander remembered it too, even less that he'd buy a trip for both of them.

_-Are you talking seriously?_ –He asked in disbelief.

Ander nodded and mumbled:

_-I chose the date of your birthday. So... the city of skyscrapers awaits us, Omar._

_-Ah! Really? New York City? Wow! I can't believe you! This is the best gift ever! Well, wait... I'm wrong. This is not the best gift; my best gift is to know that you're healthy._

Omar hugged him tightly while daydreaming about the great adventure that awaited them. Everything was perfect, and he wished with all his heart that this would be the first of many trips together. After the great news the doctor had given them, there was nothing that could tarnish their happiness, right?

*******


	4. Tough times

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I hope you're doing fine.  
> Chapter 4 is ready. I decided to cut some scenes because it got longer than I expected. Either way, I hope you like it.  
> As always, I appreciate you taking the time to read and/or comment.  
> xoxo ❤️

**_Chapter 4: Tough times_ **

**_(Ander)_ **

_Five months later_

When he decided to book that vacation to New York early in the school year, he never imagined that this trip would be a farewell.

It was missing three days before he and his friends finished high school and one more week until he and Omar cross the Atlantic to live _"the great adventure."_

A month before, as every year, representatives of the best universities worldwide had attended _Las Encinas_ to interview them and award some scholarships to the most outstanding students.

Between his medical check-ups, the finals tests, and end-of-year parties, neither he nor Omar had discussed their plans once classes were over, although he was more or less clear on what he wanted to do with his future.

Once he accredited all his subjects with a decent average, he would apply to a public university in Madrid. Although he hadn't decided yet what degree program he would study, he was almost sure to opt for architecture or some engineering. And concerning Omar, he knew that his boyfriend liked everything about cinema, so he had assumed that he would look for a university in Madrid where he could study something related to it.

He closed his eyes, and he transported to that Friday at school, a month ago, just as Omar was leaving his mother's office.

_-Hello, you..._ -He greeted him, approaching him.

_-Hey... Hi, nene._

_-Omar, Samu has organized a party at the Barceló Theater. It sounds fun, doesn't it?_

_-Ander... There's something I'd like to talk to you about._

_-What is it?_

_-Let's get out of here and take a walk. Do you want to?_

They walked silently through campus until they reached one of the cement benches furthest from the main entrance. Omar sat on the edge of the backrest and put his feet on the seat. From his expression, Ander knew something was going on but decided to wait for Omar to tell him.

_-Your mother wanted to talk to me because NYU has awarded me a scholarship._

_-What are you saying?_ –What Omar had just told him, had completely taken him off balance.

_-Well, that. The truth is that I did the interview process like everyone else, I mean... just to do it, but I never thought I could get it. You know? There are so many students and so few scholarships that..._

As he listened, he began to size up what Omar's words implied. As if it were the movie of his life, fast-motion images of the time he and Omar had shared since they met, until now, began to appear in his mind.

He never prepared for this possibility. It wouldn't be an illness, nor a fight, a deception, or a lack of love that would separate them. It would be a scholarship to go to study on the other side of the world, and nothing less than New York.

How ironic life was, so many months thinking about those longed-for vacations so that in the end, Omar would end up moving there. A feeling of fear began to invade his guts; he had only felt that way the day he had been diagnosed with cancer. And today, many months later, he felt the same anguish again.

As he could, he cleared his throat and covertly brought his index finger to the edge of his eye to wipe away a tear that threatened to roll down his cheek.

_-I'm very proud of you, seriously._

Omar looked at him but said nothing. He had a sad face, just like him. So, taking a seat next to him, he affectionately bumped his shoulder with Omar's.

_-Hey! Won't you say anything? This is incredible news, Omar!_ –He murmured, trying to sound happy.

Omar looked at him askance - _I haven’t said yes, yet._

-Omar, look at me. You can't pass up something so perfect.

_-Yeah... and what about us, huh?_

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-Omar... It's your future what we are talking about. Are you aware of the opportunity you have in front of you?_

Omar snorted, putting his hands to his face. A moment later, he turned to see him. _-Would you leave if you were in my place?_

Ander was silent, weighing his question. No. He wouldn't leave. He'd choose Omar without hesitation. But he couldn't be so selfish to tell him, because he knew that if he did, Omar would stay. He was so sad that he felt like he couldn't breathe.

_-I don't know._ –He answered after a while _. –The only thing I know is that if you don't take this opportunity, you will regret it._

_-Fuck, Ander! I know... I know what it means, but I don't want to leave you. I can't imagine living in another country and that you're not by my side._

_-Hey, listen to me. You can always come back on vacation, and I could visit you as well. It wouldn't be a break-up._

Omar looked at him shaking his head and with tears in his eyes. _-You know as well as I do that it wouldn't work._

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

_A year from the last time they saw each other_

The best thing about New York in summer was vacations. The semester was over, and that particular week he was free at work. The bad thing was the weather; it was quite hot and muggy, so that morning when he came out of the shower, he chose blue ripped knee jeans, a white t-shirt, and a matching pair of sneakers. He finished running the razor across his chin and sprayed perfume on his face and chest, before putting the bottle back on one of the bathroom shelves.

_1 million by Paco Rabanne_ was still his favorite. It had a lot to do with the fact that every time he used it, Ander’s image appeared in his mind. That blend of grapefruit, mint, leather and woody notes would always remind him of Ander and their time together in Madrid.

So many things had happened since then. It seemed as if his relationship with Ander and everything they lived together for almost three years had happened in another life and not this one. He took a deep breath, trying to get all those memories out of his head and left his flat.

He had been so lucky since the apartment where he had lived for just over a year and a half was perfect. Located on _Washington St._ in the _DUMBO_ district of _Brooklyn_ , his apartment offered a spectacular view of the famous bridge, and was only a few blocks from _York St._ subway station. But if that wasn't enough, the rent's price was dreamlike.

He was convinced that destiny had worked in his favor so that he could move to New York, since that trip that Ander had bought had become, in addition to an unforgettable vacation, a scouting trip to find a place where to live.

He still remembered that morning when he and Ander decided to afford the luxury of going to have breakfast at a rather posh restaurant because of his birthday when an elderly lady had approached them when she heard them speak in Spanish. That septuagenarian woman turned out to be a widow who was born in Madrid, but she had been living in the United States for many years, and she had decided to spend the rest of her days in a nursing home for wealthy people.

She confessed she had been listening to their conversation about the scholarship and his dilemma for not having a place to live. So, as if she were his fairy godmother, she had told him that she had just rented her apartment, but that nothing would make her happier than renting it at a reasonable price to a compatriot university boy. The amount that Doña Pilar, his future landlady, had talked about wasn’t reasonable; it was a bargain.

So there he was. A year and a half later, living in an incredible place, with a scholarship, studying Audiovisual Communication at _NYU_ , -one of the best universities in the world-, with a part-time job that allowed him to finance his expenses, and with all his dreams ahead. All but one: Ander.

The midday sun was warm and pleasant, but the sensation of humidity felt in the environment was frankly suffocating, which made him focus on the present and speed up his pace. He had to walk a couple of blocks to get to the subway, but by the time he entered the station, he was already sweating profusely. He got into the subway car and saw an unoccupied seat, sitting down, took out a small handkerchief that he used to wear at this time of year, and wiped the sweat. Less than an hour later, he arrived at terminal seven of the airport, giving mental thanks for the blessed air conditioning.

_JFK Airport_ was always crowded no matter what time it was. He walked at a brisk pace, pushing his way through excited tourists chattering nonstop as they came and went dragging their suitcases. He went directly to the toilets to wash his face, and while drying himself with a paper towel, he looked at himself in the mirror and smiled. He had always considered himself a handsome guy, a good-looking Arab boy, but today especially, seeing his reflection, he noticed that he looked different. There was a special sparkle in his gaze that he couldn't hide, and he knew perfectly well why.

He walked over to a pretty cute kiosk that sold pretzels, sandwiches, and fast food in general. He ordered a _Heineken_ beer and sat down on one of the stools that were distributed along the bar. As he drank his beer, he amused himself by imagining unlikely stories with each person that passed in front of him.

He took another sip of the bitter, cold liquid, enjoying its taste. He looked up once more at the international flight arrivals screen, just to make sure the status hadn't changed ** _. "Iberia 6251 MAD-JFK on time,"_** he looked at his watch and felt his stomach turn over.

According to his calculations, Ander should be landing at that time, so in less than an hour, he would go through customs, and he would appear through that door. It was still hard for him to believe that they would finally be together again.

The previous time, he had been the one to travel to Madrid to meet Ander, half a year after he had left. And during his stay, he and Ander had promised to make an effort to meet again before six months. But, between their different activities and a complicated agenda, that half-year had become just over a year.

While it was true that thanks to Instagram, they could keep up with each other's lives, it was far from enough. They phoned each other, texted each other often, and occasionally organized video calls that ended in virtual sex. Still, none of that could be compared to the sensation of feeling Ander's skin again, kissing his lips and tasting his taste.

As the clock ticked on, the glances he cast toward the international arrivals gate grew more persistent. He finished his second beer and stood up. He felt like a nervous teenager waiting to see his first love again.

Although he was twenty-two years old, Omar felt like that seventeen-year-old boy he once was; the one who had met with that attractive guy with which he had sneaked to sell him some weed, on a bridge in the middle of nowhere. Who would have said that several years later, that guy would become the most important person in his life?

As he thought about it, he looked up absentmindedly and then he saw him. When their gazes met, he felt as if a handful of butterflies were fluttering in his stomach. Ander was smiling at him. He stopped breathing, and his heart began to beat much faster. _"Joder! He looked more handsome than ever."_

Dressed in jeans, a black T-shirt, and his peculiar earring on his left ear, he walked with a determined step towards him. With his right hand, he was dragging a medium red suitcase with wheels, and with the other hand, he was holding a pair of sunglasses.

It seemed that his feet had been nailed to the floor since, for a few seconds, he remained motionless. Everything around him became blurred, except for the figure of Ander, who kept moving towards him. Finally, Omar was able to react, and the last meters that separated them, he trotted through until he reached Ander.

_-Hey! Finally!_ –Omar greeted without being able to contain the happiness, smiling from ear to ear.

_-Joder! How handsome you are! -_ Ander replied, releasing his suitcase to hug him tightly.

They stayed like that, hugging each other for a long time in the middle of the room. Ander released him and cupped his face between his hands, to kiss him on the lips without caring about the looks of some curious people.

_-I can't believe that you are finally here!_ –Omar murmured, resting his forehead against Ander's.

Ander nodded with tears in his eyes. _-I promised, didn't I?_

With his thumb, Omar wiped away one of the tears that ran down Ander's cheek, while he hugged him again.

_-How was the flight?_ -He asked a moment later as he grabbed Ander's suitcase, and they both started heading towards the exit.

_-In economy class? You can imagine it._ -He joked, shrugging his shoulders.

During the journey back to his apartment, Ander brought him up to date on his mother and their mutual friends, who were still living in Madrid.

_-… And well, you already found out that Samu and Carla are together again, right? And about Guzmán and Nadia, there's not much I can tell you that you don't know._

When they arrived at his flat, Omar began to feel that familiar tingling in his chest due to the anticipation. However, he tried to control himself; they would have plenty of time to fuck. He thought Ander would be tired and hungry because, knowing him, he almost certainly hadn't tried the food on the plane, so leaving the suitcase next to the door he turned to him.

_-Do you feel like going out to eat? Or if you prefer I can cook something while you take a shower to cool off..._

_-Wow, just wow! This floor is terrific, Omar! I'm freaking out!_ -He stated, letting out a whistle, not paying attention to the suggestion about food. _–You told me it was cool, but you fell short._

Ander was studying the second year of the Architecture degree at the _Complutense University of Madrid,_ so everything related to antique buildings and the design of interior spaces drove him crazy.

Omar smiled upon hearing him. Ander didn't know his apartment since the process of the rent had been done blindly once they both returned to Madrid, so it had also been a surprise for Omar when Doña Pilar showed it to him a month later.

_-This is not just any floor, it's a loft... Look at the height of the ceiling, the combination of the bricks with the steel... and those windows? Wow!_ -He exclaimed, walking on the wooden floor until he reached the wide window to admire the B _rooklyn Bridge._

Omar came up from behind and rested his head on Ander's back as he hugged him. _– The view is cool, isn't it? Do you remember when we walked on that bridge? We put the lock with our names despite being prohibited._ -Ander stroked his hands and turned to look him in the eye as they both smiled.

_-Will it still be there?_ -Ander asked curiously.

_-We could find out... Would you like to?_

_-Okay, we could do that later._

_-Done. And what would you like to do now? Are you hungry?_

_-Aha._ -Ander smiled, cupping his head with both hands as he kissed his mouth.

_-I'm serious... don't you want to eat?_ –He insisted when both separated to take a breath.

Ander reluctantly released him. _-Okay, do you want me to help you cook?_

Being an open space, the only thing separating the living-dining room space was the industrial-style kitchen isle. He and Ander moved freely, focused on the task at hand. It was fun to see Ander in an apron chopping garlic almost millimetrically, while he boiled the pasta and disinfected the lettuce to make a salad. They drank beers and chatted about college, and occasionally, Ander would come up to kiss him.

It was such a domestic scene that Omar felt a lump in his throat. He began to daydream, imagining how easy life could be like this with Ander; sharing the same roof with just the two of them, doing things as simple as making dinner, and chatting about their day. He sighed. He knew that none of that was possible, and being sure of it only made him feel helpless.

An hour later, sitting in front of the kitchen bar, they ate pasta with salad, and they drank beer, laughing and chatting cheerfully. When they finished, Omar began to wash the dishes, while Ander dried them. When the kitchen was clean, Ander cornered him against the isle and began to kiss him.

Ander dropped his body against him to show him how horny he was.

_-Joder! You don't know how many times I dreamed of this moment…_ -Ander murmured, kissing him along the neck, biting him gently in the process, licking his mouth again seconds later.

Omar responded ferociously, taking off Ander's shirt hastily while still kissing him. Ander did the same, dropping Omar's shirt to the floor. Unable to hold back for another minute, Omar took him by the hand and dragged him into the room.

Within seconds they were naked, licking into each other's lips and exploring every corner of their bodies as if it were the first time, marveling at each other's reactions. Omar was breathing hard, and Ander responded to his caresses with the same intensity. The relationship between them had always been so intense that it was like a chemical reaction impossible to explain. And despite all these months away from each other, that chemistry between them, far from disappearing, seemed much more powerful, so much that it scared him.

He was a drug. _"His drug; potent, dangerous, lively_." Just like now.

After so many time, they were back together again. Ander was between his legs, so close to his entrance, the tip of his cock just barely inside him. He didn't thrust deeper. He didn't even move his body. And yet Omar was going wild, squeezing him, holding him, arching his hips against Ander desperate to keep him with him, in him.

_-So, you missed me, –_ Ander muttered with a hoarse voice due to desire, slipping in just another inch.

His body pulsed because of his words. Omar struggled to get air into his lungs. His skin felt so hot that he wanted to rip it off.

_-I know you want this as much as I do. –Omar groaned; his fingers squeezing Ander's shoulders._

_-I missed you too, Omar, and I love that I can make you feel so good._

_-If you really wanted me to feel good, you'd do what I want now. I need you._

_-I can see that, and believe me; I need you as much as you do._

Omar didn't sure about that; actually, he didn't want to think about it at that moment; he just needed to feel Ander right away. Each pore of his body was begging for Ander's touch. He couldn't bear the wait to feel Ander inside of him; he wanted to squeeze the thick rounded tip of his cock, again and again.

Omar couldn't remember having felt that need with anyone else. Not after Ander. None of the guys that he had been with during this time had been able to turn him on in the way Ander used to do it. And it wasn't clear to him how he would handle his life when Ander returned to Madrid in a few more days; he couldn't think about it when he was all so horny. He just wasn't able to knit a single coherent thought right now.

_-It's not enough._ –He said breathlessly.

_-What would you like then?_ –Ander asked, amused.

_-You know what I like…_ -Omar mumbled.

_-Mmm… Yeah, I know._ -Ander smiled. And when he was about to do it, Omar noticed that Ander was hesitating.

_-Omar…_ -He suddenly asked, changing his expression as if he didn't want to hear the answer. – _Should I need to use a condom?_

That question took him by surprise, but Omar knew why Ander had asked.

_-There are a few in the nightstand._ –Omar whispered as the only answer, hoping that wouldn't screw up the moment.

Ander said nothing, but his gaze darkened, although almost immediately, he composed himself. Omar watched him open the drawer and take out one of the foil wrappers; seconds later, he tore it with his teeth. Omar could see Ander slip the latex over his thick, hard cock. After that, without saying a word, he shoved hard inside his body, up to fill him up completely.

Omar nearly groaned out loud. This time Ander hadn't been gentle or tender, and the pain he felt was the proof of that, but it didn't matter because, after a few seconds, the pain gave way to indescribable pleasure. This… this was what he wanted. This is what he needed. His arms wrapped around Ander's shoulders, and he held him tightly, his eyes burning, and his throat aching because he felt overwhelming emotion.

He'd missed him so much. Ander couldn't even imagine it.

Even though Ander would leave him soon, Omar would always choose to be with him at any time he could, no matter how much he would miss him later. He had no certainty how long this _"peculiar dynamic"_ would last, but he was convinced that he was going to enjoy all and each one of the moments that they could share.

And with that thought, tears seeped from beneath his lashes, as he struggled to contain the sadness and pain.

_-Hey, don't cry, please._ –Ander asked, trying to contain his own tears, shifting his weight to his forearms to pull out his dick and then thrust in again, deeply and slowly this time _._ – _I've missed you so much that it hurts, so let me show you how much I need you; let me make you feel good._

Omar knew everything this was so tough for both of them, and probably everything would just fall apart later, but right now, he couldn't think about anything else but enjoy this moment. He had no defenses against this… against this hard test that life put on them. Ander made him come alive. He made him feel, period. He made his spine tingle and that his skin prickle.

Omar drew a sad smile, giving in while whispering: - _It's just that you have no idea how much I've missed you too, nene. It sucks to be far away from you._

Ander began to move, burying his dick deeply just to drawback out and do it over and over again. His length so warm inside him and with each thrust brushed that particular spot transporting him to heaven, and there was no way to resist that delicious torment Ander provoked on him. It was just a matter of time before he'd cum. It was just a matter of time before he'd make him shatter.

Ander's rhythm increased, thrusting his body against him harder, faster, and Omar clung tighter, answering each thrust with a lift of his hips, pressing up against Ander to create the most tension and friction possible between them.

Ander growled his pleasure, and from his quickening tempo, Omar knew Ander was close to cumming, but surprisingly, held back. Omar could see Ander's determined gaze wanting to extend pleasure, and Omar, in response, wanted to hold back just to defy him. But Ander's hand moved between them stroking his cock, and, feeling Ander rub it between his fingers, couldn't resist one more minute. Omar cum over Ander's abs just seconds before Ander did as well, letting himself fall on him as he shuddered uncontrollably.

It was only then that a voice whispered in his head that it would be impossible to get over him if they continued doing this.

_-I'd almost forgotten how it felt to make love with you. I hadn't felt this way in a while._ -Omar whispered. It was a confession made more to himself than to Ander. Because for him, whenever he was with Ander, it would be making love and not just fucking. While trying to catch his breath, Ander shifted his weight, plopping onto the mattress next to him.

_-Mmm... It could be because nobody else loves you the way I do._ – Ander answered, sketching a broad smile, making appear those lovely dimples, which Omar loved so much, looking more handsome if that was possible. And, after saying that, Ander pulled him onto his side so that he could hold him close to his chest, tangling his long legs with his.

_-You're probably right. You know, we both agreed to go out with other people, but… I'm not sure if that really helps. It seems that only makes me miss you even more._

Ander stiffened and adopted a serious gesture but said nothing. After a couple of minutes of silence, Ander finally confessed:

_-I know that all of this it's not conventional, but I want you to be happy, and living on two different continents is the only way to cope with this situation, or do you think I like that?, To be far away from you? The mere fact of thinking you fucking with other guys... Believe me, it's fucking hard._

_-Jodeeer, Ander! Don't you think it's also painful for me, huh? I know that I'm not the only one who is fucking with other guys. I don't know… What are we doing, dude? I'm afraid that we're making a big mistake, I mean, what's the point? What is gonna happen in the future? What if you fall in love with someone else?_ –Omar struggled to sit up, but Ander didn't let him.

_-Hey! Omar! Listen to me… Please. This is what we have. Why don't we focus on the present? I'm here right now… I flew more than seven hours to be with you, why we don't use this time to have a good time instead of worrying for things that haven't even happened?_

Omar sighed. He knew that Ander was right. So, making a great effort, he tried to smile. He put a hand on Ander's chin while saying: _-I'm sorry. I screwed it up. Forgive me, please._

Ander wrapped him with both arms and kissed him gently on the mouth _. –I love you, dumbass, don't forget it. Now, can we rest awhile? And then we could take a walk over the Brooklyn Bridge to see if that padlock is still there. Would you like to?_

Omar nodded and cuddled by his side. Five minutes later, he glanced back at him, and his eyes were closed, his long lashes resting on his high cheekbones. His swollen pinkish lips were slightly parted, and his earring shined because of the soft light of the lamp. His even breathing told him he was already asleep.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Omar told himself he wouldn't be able to sleep after what they had discussed. He told himself it would be impossible to relax. How could he doze off when his mind was racing? Because deep down, even when Ander didn't want to admit it in front of him, they both knew that this kind of relationship would be impossible to maintain in the long term, and that made him feel miserable. And yet somehow, minutes later, he was asleep, still clinging in Ander's arms, dreaming with the possibility of sharing a life together.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

He woke up and, for a moment, didn't know where he was, but almost immediately, he felt an arm hugging him from behind. He moved slowly to turn around, and Omar was there. His eyes were closed, and he was snoring softly. Determined not to wake him up, he focused on watching him. He wanted to make sure he had memorized the features that made Omar perfect before his eyes.

Sometimes when he was alone, and nostalgia invaded him, he would spend hours looking at Omar's pics imagining the life they hadn't been able to have. And it was with those photos when he had discovered a smile or a look that his mind had blocked, causing anxiety to take hold of him, realizing that he had already begun to forget those little details.

Things between them were so complicated, and he knew that nothing would be fixed just by going to see him that week. He unspeakably missed him; having Omar in his arms again after so long had been torture, because he had realized that Omar was no longer his.

It was difficult living like this. Away from each other, knowing that Omar had a life here, without him. Occasionally, when he got to see a guy in Omar's posts, hugging him or looking at him in a particular way, he would immediately close Instagram. He wasn't stupid, and he was aware of it, but still, he couldn't help but feel hurt.

He hooked up with some guys too, obviously, but it never became serious. He used to get laid with random guys, and never saw them again. Although some of them were fun or handsome, none of them was Omar.

_-What are you thinking?_

He was startled to hear Omar but quickly smiled.

_-I think we could go for a walk. Would you like to?_

Omar closed his eyes and snuggled against him, hugging him tightly.

_-Five minutes? Please?_ -Omar muttered against his neck, tickling him due to the stubble that was beginning to grow.

_-Okay…_ -He conceded, trying to control the laughter.

That week Ander would remember it for many years.

Those five minutes had become half an hour, during which they both enjoyed the silence, one in the arms of the other. That silence had become comfortable, a complicit silence. Expressing without words all the love they still felt for each other.

As promised, they took a walk on the _Brooklyn Bridge_ , and both were surprised to see the padlock engraved with their names right where Ander had placed it. On one of the steel girders farthest from the pass so that it couldn't be easily seen, that padlock still shone with the rays of the evening sun. The weather and the time had taken their toll on it; it was a little rusty, but still as firm and as steady as the first day.

When Ander saw it, he didn't know why confidence in him returned. Seeing that padlock, he couldn't help but compare it to their relationship. Despite all the obstacles, it was still there. And just like that little piece of metal, he decided to believe that they would prevail too.

That week flew by. He and Omar did everything; they walked through the streets of New York like it was the first time, delighting in its beauty. They cycled _Central Park_ , occasionally stopping somewhere quiet to lie on the grass and chat for hours; they went up to _the_ _Empire State Building_ and admired the spectacular night view of the city. They went to the _"Top of the Rock"_ at _The Rockefeller Center_ , got on the ferry to see the Statue of Liberty, and he took the opportunity to take a pic of Omar; also they walked through _China Town_ , and ate pizza and pasta in _Little Italy._

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

They entered the _MoMA_ and toured its six floors, stopping at the works of art from _Picasso_ and _Salvador Dalí_ , as well as _Van Gogh_ and _Warhol_. They also visited the _MET_ , and of course, the _Guggenheim Museum_ couldn't be missing, since it was an icon of the city and an architectural jewel that Ander couldn't miss. It had been exceptional to contemplate it.

One of those nights, Omar had literally dragged him to _Broadway_ to watch _Kinky Boots'_ musical. Although at first, he wasn't into, seeing Omar's excited face had been enough for him to accept willingly. When they were younger, he used to joke with Omar calling him _"Drama Queen,"_ so he thought it was funny he wanted to watch that particular musical. In the end, both of them had really enjoyed it, since the plot was based on a real event. It told the story of _Charlie Price_ , a young man who had to save a shoe factory after his father's sudden death, helped by a transvestite actor named _Lola_. But the spectacular thing about the play was to see the impressive choreographies of the drags and the vocal performances of the songs by _Cindy Lauper._

On the last day of his stay, they visited _Grand Central Station_ , but unlike the first time, he gave Omar a full lecture on its architectural beauty and some of its curiosities, such as the _Whispering Gallery_. As they walked towards it, Ander explained to Omar that it was a double parabola vault that allowed sound to travel unhindered from one of its columns to its opposite. They could have a conversation from column to column, without anyone in the center of the gallery being able to hear them.

_-You're kidding, right?_ –Omar had asked incredulously.

_-I'm gonna show you. Stay here and stick your ear_ _to the column. I'll go to the other side, I'll whisper something to you, and you'll listen to it._

_-Ander, if this is a joke... and I look like an asshole stick to the column in front of all these people... You're gonna regret it._ –He had said in a loving tone.

_-Trust me._ -He gave him a brief kiss on the lips and walked away to the opposite column.

_-I love you._ –He whispered to the column, looking in the direction of Omar to see his reaction.

_-Fuck!_ –He heard him laugh, and seconds later, he replied: _-I love you too, never forget it._

*******

That night, after making love, they lay embraced in silence. Ander had his head pressed against Omar's chest and could hear the rhythmic beating of his heart. Suddenly, he noticed Omar's pace beating up for no apparent reason, so he raised his face to look at him.

- _Are you ok?_

_-Yes, why are you asking?_

_-For no reason._ –He lied. But almost immediately, he heard him say:

_-What time does your flight leave tomorrow?_

Ander sighed, feeling immediately melancholic. They had spent some incredible days, enjoying each other's company, enjoying the city by day, and making love every night, but the time was up and the feeling of emptiness that he was experiencing, couldn't alleviate it with anything. It was increasingly difficult to say goodbye.

_-At ten in the morning, so I must be at the airport at seven._

_-I see... We can book a taxi at six to arrive on time. -_ Omar suggested.

Ander sat up to look him in the eye.

_-Omar, I'd rather have us say goodbye here._

Omar said nothing but saw him nod sadly.

_–Joder, Omar… I'm gonna miss you so much._

_-Me too, nene. When will we see each other again?_ -Ander heard him ask, trying to hold back the tears.

Ander didn't know for sure and didn't want to create false expectations for him. Between college, his job, and saving enough money, it would be hard to travel again soon.

_-I don't know, Omar. Do you think you can travel to Madrid in the coming months?_ –He asked, hopefully.

_-It could be. I look forward to seeing my parents and Nadia, Guzmán, and Marina too. So I could arrange it, but it would be until the end of the next semester._

_-It's better than nothing, I guess. I'll be waiting for you then._

After that brief conversation, they were both silent, deep in their own thoughts. Ander didn't know what Omar was thinking, but while absentmindedly stroking Omar's arm with his fingertips, he believed that this " _little breath_ " they had had, would help them stay strong.

*******


	5. I wish you were by my side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, I hope you are doing fine! Chapter 5 is ready.  
> I had initially planned a seven-chapter story but have decided to leave it open.  
> This is because the chapters were getting longer trying to fit into seven blocks, and there was a possibility of leaving out things that seem essential to me. That's the reason.  
> Either way, I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I did writing it.  
> xoxo 😘

**Chapter 5: I wish you were by my side**

**_(Ander)_ **

_Five months later..._

The months after his return from New York, were challenging. However, between the delivery of final projects, scale models, and other works from college, he had hardly had time to miss Omar. The good thing about having such a busy mind was that the days flew by, and the date to see him every time was less distant. It was exactly twenty-eight days to be more precise... _"And it wasn't that I was counting them, of course"_ -He thought a little embarrassed.

Omar would come to Madrid for the winter holidays, which coincided with the end of the school semester, so for that reason, -unlike many other years-, the arrival of Christmas made him feel so excited. As a child, he used to stay up on Christmas Eve because of the emotion to open his gifts the next day. Only this time, he wouldn't find his gift wrapped in a big bow under the tree but would be waiting for him with open arms at the airport.

The sound of the cell phone brought him out of his reverie. He looked at the screen and raising the device to his ear, he growled:

_-Hey, Guzmán..._

_-¿Qué hay macho? What are you doing?_

Ander glanced at his computer and put his hand to his neck, massaging it. He had spent more than two hours trying to finish a 3D model for his final project, but he wasn't satisfied at all. So he pushed it aside and sighed.

_-Nothing exciting, and you?_ –He answered, biting the tip of the pen he had on the other hand.

_-I pretend to take advantage of my free night. Nadia has gone with Marina to help her parents with something from the store, and she'll spend the night with them. And Samu has invited me to a party organized by his college friends. So make yourself handsome, because you will join us. It isn't every day that we all have the opportunity to go out together._

Ander smiled. He greatly appreciated the company of his friends, because, since it hadn’t been for Guzman, Samu, Rebe, and even Lu it would have been much more challenging to cope with Omar's absence. He stretched his arms above his head and moved his neck in circles, causing a bone's snap.

_-Okay... it would be cool to get out and get drunk like in the old days; hey, we could invite Rebe and Lu._

_-Mmm... I don't know if Lu feels comfortable with Rebe, dude. Although I love them, you know what those two girls are like when they are together._

_-Okay, you may be right. Let's invite Rebe this time._

In a few more days, it would be two and a half years since the doctors had told him he was in remission, and although he should continue to perform semi-annual check-ups without fail; now he could live a normal life and afford to get drunk whenever he felt like it.

He, Samu, and Guzmán were studying at the same university, although in different courses of study. Samuel studied Law and Guzmán Business Administration and Management, so it was common for them to meet to eat or have a beer at least once a week. And when Nadia and Omar's parents took care of Marina, Guzmán joined them to party, always with Nadia's approval although he didn't want to admit it in front of them.

It was comforting that Omar's best friend had become one of his best friends as well, as they saw each other frequently and sometimes even talked about Omar. Although that didn't happen very often since Ander wasn't very given to talk about his feelings, so he preferred to keep his life private, and Samu seemed to understand it.

An hour later, the four of them arrived at a cellar located in the north of the city. It had been equipped with tables, chairs, and a full dance floor; besides, there was a large bar with two bartenders and a Dj in a kind of pallet playing trap, reggaeton, and electronic music.

The four of them went straight to the bar and asked for some shots. Guzmán shouted _"in one gulp!"_ they quickly drank the tequila and, after that, squeezed lemon in their mouths. When Ander felt the alcohol run down his throat, he winced, but when he saw Samu's face, he laughed out loud.

_-Hostia! This burns… -_ Samuel complained, sucking the rest of the lemon, but ready to drink the next one.

_-Come on, Samu! You should be used to it by now…_ -Rebecca scoffed, giving him a loving punch on the arm.

After the third round of shots, he felt elated. Happy to have agreed to go out with his friends and excited to remember that in a few weeks, he would see Omar. Half an hour later, the four of them jumped and danced amusingly in the middle of the dance floor.

_-I'll be right back!_ -He yelled at Rebe, who stopped jumping and put her ear close to try to understand what he was saying. Raising her thumb, she continued to dance.

He needed to find the toilets, so moving away from his friends, he began to make his way through the crowd. When he got out a few minutes later, he decided to make a stop before heading back to his friends. He was leaning against the bar counter, waiting for his drink when he heard a familiar voice calling him.

_-Ander?_

He turned to where the voice was coming from and smiled.

_-Nacho…_ -He greeted him, shaking his hand.

_-What a surprise to see you here, macho!_ –He replied, showing a genuine smile.

Ander was surprised to see him, although if he thought better of it, it wasn't uncommon that he had run into him in that place since he studied at the same course as Samu. He remembered that it was more than six months since the last time they had seen each other.

Nacho was a nice guy; a couple of years older than him, he was in his last year of Political Science and had met him at one of the many parties he had attended with his friends.

He wore gray jeans, a blue shirt, and a jacket. His expressive green eyes were more intense due to the color of the shirt, his light brown hair was slightly longer than he remembered, and he had grown a beard.

He was a pretty attractive guy, and a couple of times, they had ended up fucking, but Ander decided to cut off all contact with him because he had noticed that Nacho seemed to be looking for more than just a one night stand.

_-How’ve you been?_ -He asked, dropping his hand on Ander's shoulder, lightly massaging it.

_-I’m fine... you know, studying and that... What about you?_

_-Same. This is my last semester, so I'll start working full time. Hey... do you want us to have a drink and catch up? You know... we could go somewhere else later..._

Hearing him, he shifted awkwardly, letting go of his grip. Ander knew what he was referring to, but had no intention to get laid with him, so he took the glass that the bartender had just served him and took a sip trying to gain time.

_-Maybe another time, okay? Now I'm with some friends, and they're waiting for me._

_-Sure... no problem, dude._ -He answered, hiding his disappointment. _-Do you still have the same number?_

_-The same one..._ -Ander nodded as he shook his hand and tapped him on the back in farewell. _–We're in touch then…_

As soon as they said goodbye, Ander walked away and didn't look back. He, Guzmán, Rebe, and Samu, continued drinking and dancing until after a while, he felt the mobile vibrate against his thigh. He put the hand in his pants pocket and smiled excitedly when he saw that it was Omar who was calling. It was after midnight, so in New York, it would be six in the afternoon, so he imagined that Omar would already be at his apartment.

_-Hello! Give me one sec!_ -He shouted, putting his hand to his opposite ear to try to muffle the sound of the music and be able to hear. He started walking towards the exit to get away from the noise so that he could talk to him without being interrupted. When he left the place, he adjusted his jacket as he felt the cold December air soak into his bones.

_-Sorry, but I wasn't listening to you... I came to a party with Rebe, Samu, and Guzmán._ –He greeted him.

_-How cool!_ -He heard Omar's deep voice on the other side of the line. – _If you want to, I'll call you later; I thought you would be at your house._

_-No, don't worry. I’m already outside; also, it's always good to listen to you. You don't know how much I want to kiss you…_ -He confessed, feeling a pang in his crotch when he imagined it.

_-Ander, it's just... I need to talk to you about something important, but I think now is not the time. I really would like us to talk tomorrow._

Hearing him, he frowned.

_-What is it, Omar? Is everything alright?_ -He urged, hearing a snort from the other end of the line.

_-Pfff... Well, it's not all right. It turns out that my boss has decided to advance the filming of one of the documentaries that were scheduled for January, and he asked me to assist him. You know that this job is important not only because it helps me finance my expenses, but because it's related to my career and it would be complicated to get something similar..._

_-I don't get it, Omar. What do you mean?_

_-That I won't be able to travel to Madrid as I had planned..._

He felt as if a bucket of cold water had been poured into him. He was silent, trying to process what Omar had just told him. It wasn't until he heard his voice again, that he could react.

_-Ander? Are you still there?_

_-I'm here._ -He mumbled.

_-I'm really sorry, nene... I really wanted to see you, but... That's out of my reach._

He interrupted him. _-And then, when will you come?_

_-Well, that's the thing, with classes starting in January; it will be difficult to travel... I'm not sure, but I can probably leave my plane ticket open and go in spring break..._

_-Until April? Are you kidding me?_ -He couldn't help but raise his voice. With each passing minute, he felt more and more pissed off. He put his hand to his face and reluctantly wiped away a tear that ran down his cheek.

_-I know this is bullshit... I'm sorry..._

Ander was silent for several seconds until finally, he muttered in a weary tone:

_-You know? I don't think I can keep doing this, Omar._

_-Ander... Don't say that, please._

_-I’ve to go; we’ll talk another day._ –He said, releasing the air contained in the lungs and then cut the communication.

What happened next, he couldn't remember clearly. In his mind, there was only emptiness, disappointment, and frustration. He couldn't, nor did he want to hide the weariness that suddenly invaded him; he was tired of continuing to pretend that the thousands of miles that separated them, hadn’t affected him; tired of trying to keep a relationship at a distance. The certainty that there was no future for them made him feel hopeless, so releasing a curse, he returned to the party with a goal in mind.

As he walked among the people, he found what he was looking for. Nacho had a drink in his hand while chatting and laughing with a group of people. Without hesitation, Ander approached him and taking him by the arm, said in his ear:

_-Do you still feel like going somewhere else?_

He could see the surprise reflected on his face but immediately recomposed visibly pleased.

_-Of course... where do you want to go?_

Ander shrugged, leaving it to him to decide. He really didn't care about the place, as long as he could forget about Omar only for that night.

_-Come on; I know where we can go_. - And pulling him by the arm, he dragged him towards the exit.

Twenty minutes later, Ander entered Nacho's flat, following him into the kitchen. There, the other boy opened the fridge and handed him a beer.

_-Don't you have something stronger?_

Nacho looked at him, raising an eyebrow and smiled. He put the beer away again and instead took out a bottle of black label.

_\- Is whiskey ok?_

_-On the rocks, please._

He took out a couple of glasses, put ice cubes inside them, and then poured a generous amount of alcohol.

_-My roomie is out of town._ –He said by way of explanation, handing the glass to Ander.

Ander said nothing, just raised the glass to his lips to take a sip.

- _Why did you change your mind?_

Releasing a sigh, he replied: - _I would rather not talk about it..._

_-I see... A guy of a few words. You haven't changed macho._

Ander didn't want to talk, he just needed to get drunk and try to numb the pain he was feeling, so in one gulp, he drank the rest of the content. Seconds later, he brought the glass back to his lips to put one of the ice cubes into his mouth, and leaving the glass on the kitchen counter, took two steps towards him.

_-So? We don't need to talk..._

_-No, we don't. Although I'd just like to say that you are even more handsome than the last time I saw you_.

Very reluctantly, Nacho's comment made him smile, and without needing to answer him, he got closer to him until he almost brushed his lips. They were so close to each other that Ander could smell the alcohol on Nacho's breath, mixed with the perfume he was wearing - _a scent very different from Omar's,_ -he thought bitterly.

Ander reached up to hold the back of Nacho's neck and gently bit his lower lip, then thrust his tongue in. The ice had almost melted, yet the sensation he experienced as he explored the other boy's mouth and felt his warmth in contrast to his cold tongue, made him groan.

Each kiss and each caress was his way of withdrawing from reality. Ander wanted to have yelled at Omar how unhappy he had made him feel; He wanted to have told Omar how disappointed he was, but instead, he was kissing someone else, taking refuge in his arms to see if he could be able to not feel pain.

*******

The following days he avoided Omar. He stopped entering Instagram and didn't pick up the phone the two times Omar called him. He needed time to get over it, and he coped with it the only way he knew how; alone. Sometimes he would go for a walk and inadvertently end up on the bridge where he and Omar met. There, he leaned against the railing and spent hours thinking about his future.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Actually, he wasn't upset with Omar, he even understood him. But that didn't mean that it didn't hurt or that he was willing to continue living like this; he was angry at life. Because Ander always thought that he and Omar would end up together, but now he saw that possibility more and more distant.

At times he managed to forget him, but unlike the days, which he used to complete the semester projects, the nights could be fucking painful. The darkness of the night was uncertain as to his future with Omar, and as much as he tried not to think about him, he invariably ended up sneaking into his thoughts.

It was Christmas Eve, and because Omar's parents didn't celebrate those dates, Guzmán and Nadia had invited him to their apartment to have dinner with them, but he had rejected the invitation. He didn't want to be there and risk maintaining an awkward conversation about Omar. Besides, he didn't want to leave his mother alone on a night like this. So he planned to have dinner with her and then go partying.

When he went down to the kitchen to see his mother, she was finishing preparing the typical almond soup, while she baked seabream and drank a glass of wine.

Ander pulled out a beer and sat next to her.

_-Ander, you have received an envelope by mail._

_-An envelope?_ -He asked, puzzled.

_-Yes, I left it on the table at the entrance... It seems to me it's from Omar because it has a New York postage stamp._

_-Oh yeah? Thanks_. -He mumbled without any expression.

_-Aren't you going to open it?_ -She asked, surprised.

_-Later. Do you need me to help you with something?_ –He asked, changing the conversation.

When they finished dinner, he thanked her for dinner and got up.

_-I'll be out, mom. Don't wait for me awake._

He saw her smile, and almost immediately said:

_-I don't like to see you like this._

_-How?_

_-Sad. As soon as you knew that Omar wouldn't come, you have had that expression on your face._

_-Mom, please; Leave it. I don't want to talk about that._

_-Okay. I won't say anything else. If you're going out, have fun but don't be too late, okay?_

Nodding, he grabbed his jacket and headed to the exit. He saw the envelope and didn't need to see the postal stamp or the sender, to know that it was Omar who had sent it to him, since the name of _"Ander Muñoz"_ along with his home address, was written with the unmistakable calligraphy of Omar. For a moment, he thought about leaving it there, but in the end, he ended up taking the envelope to put in his jacket pocket. Closing the door behind him, he started to walk.

A few meters before reaching the Barceló Theater, he stopped. He took out a cigarette and lit it; as he exhaled the smoke, he reached into his pocket and took out the envelope. _"What could he have written to me that made things different?"_ -He thought with a hint of bitterness.

They had been living in different cities for two years and had only met twice during that time. Even if he wanted to be optimistic, it was tough to do so if he stuck to the facts. He puffed on the cigar again and opened the envelope. Inside was a postcard of a sunset on the Brooklyn Bridge. For a few minutes, he stared at the pic, and images of the two appeared in his mind.

It seemed as if it were yesterday and not a little bit more than two years ago when they walked on that bridge for the first time, to put a padlock as a symbol of their love. He quickly wiped away a tear and turned the postcard over. With perfect calligraphy, five words were written. _"I miss you so much."_

Sighing, he stuffed the postcard back into the envelope and putting it into his jacket pocket, entered the club.

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very sorry it was a sad chapter; 😣🥺however, it was necessary for the development of the plot I have in mind.  
> Until the next one!


	6. Love is a two-way street

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Chapter 6 is ready!  
> Thanks for reading and commenting; it makes me very happy to know that you enjoy this story.  
> xoxo 😉 💛

**Chapter 6: Love is a two-way street**

**_(Omar)_ **

_December 31 st._

It had been a little over a month since he had spoken to Ander to tell him that he wouldn't be able to travel. Since then, Ander had been avoiding him, and that made him feel terribly bad. The two times he had called him, the same times that Ander had diverted the call, so in the end, resigned, he decided to give him time.

Still, he'd sent him a postcard in the traditional mail in hopes of… He didn't really think that would change anything between them, he just had done because it was true; he missed him a lot, and it was a way he had found to let him know.

He remembered that day when on his way back from college, he had passed by a place that sold souvenirs, and out of the corner of his eye, he saw that postcard of the _Brooklyn Bridge_. As if attracted to a magnet, he entered the store and bought it. Of all the places they had been, that bridge had a special meaning for both of them.

By now, he was sure his postcard had arrived, but he still had no news of Ander. He hadn't uploaded anything to Instagram either; it just seemed as if the earth had swallowed him up. He was undecided about what to do; it was New Year's Eve, and he wanted to hear his voice immensely, but due to his silence, he wasn't sure Ander felt the same way he did.

While weighing his options, he nervously played with his mobile; it was seven o'clock at night in Madrid, so hopefully, Ander would still be at his house. While he was thinking about it, the cell phone started ringing, and he smiled when he saw that it was Ander who was calling.

_-Hey, I can't believe it..._ -Omar answered after two tones.

_-Hey, how you doing?_ -He heard Ander in a deep voice.

_-Well, what can I tell you? I thought you were ignoring me._

_-I'm sorry, Omar. I needed time to think._

_-Are you still angry?_

Ander didn't answer immediately, it wasn't until a few seconds later, that he heard him say:

_-I'm not mad at you, Omar. I know I shouldn't have reacted that way, but this is all very hard... You were right when you said this wouldn't work_.

_-What do you mean, Ander?_

_-We've only seen each other a couple of times in two years._

Hearing him, he let out a desperate sigh. It seemed that things wouldn't turn out well, after all. Still, he asked:

_-Did you receive my postcard?_

_-Yeah, last week..._

_-I see..._ -He shook his head, and almost immediately, confronted him _. -So, you're calling me because...?_

_-I'm sorry, Omar, but it was true when I told you that I can't continue doing this._

_-This? What do you mean by this? You don't want to see me anymore? You don't want to talk with me? Or is it that you don't love me anymore?_ -He said, throwing question after question. Seconds later, he held his breath, waiting for an answer, feeling increasingly helpless.

_-Joder! Don't ask me that. Why do you want to know? Either way, we can't be together..._

_-Just answer me. You don't love me anymore?_ \- He knew he was behaving childishly, but he didn't know what else he could do.

Omar heard a stifled sob. It seemed like he could see him. He imagined him alone, sitting on the windowsill, trying to hold back the tears, and that saddened him even more.

_-Of course, I love you, jodeeer! If I didn't feel anything for you, all this would be much easier... but what's the point, Omar? We live on two different continents, and at least another two years are left to finish college. And then? What future do we have?_

Omar was silent. What could he say to him? He understood Ander and knew that love was a thing of two; as much as he wanted to continue supporting that fragile relationship with thin threads, if Ander was no longer willing, there was nothing he could do. He couldn't force him. Still, he didn't want to give up; he couldn't allow things to end like this between them, so he insisted in a trembling voice:

_-Look, I'll try to travel to Madrid in the coming months... Do you think we could talk about this?_

Another silence; this time longer.

_-Ander?_ –He insisted.

_-Okay._

_-Thanks..._

_-I've to go, Omar._

_-Vale... well, happy new year, nene... and don't forget that I love you._

*******

Between the winter's cold and cloudy landscapes, it seemed that every day was the same; he longed more than ever for those hot summer days when he and Ander walked carefree through the streets of New York. Now all he did was focus on his studies and getting the job done. Some weekends, he'd hang out with friends from college to have a few beers and get rid of the daily routine, but when he arrived at his apartment, the loneliness he felt was difficult to cope with.

On the other hand, he'd decided not to hook up with random guys. Since Ander had visited him a few months earlier, he no longer wanted to continue having these kinds of encounters, because although he managed to satisfy that physical need momentarily, when everything ended, the emptiness he experienced was so much worse. So when he needed it, he ended up jerking off, and ten minutes later, he forgot about it.

The messages and calls between the two were increasingly sporadic, and if he was honest with himself, most of the time, it was him who looked for Ander, so thinking about having virtual sex was out of the question.

At times, he wondered if it was worth continuing to try, but the moment he heard Ander's voice, the warmth with which Ander spoke his name... at that moment he forgot all his fears and returned to convince himself that not even time or not even the distance had made a dent in them. It was as if not a day had passed since he had left.

That night he had been late to his apartment after a day of shit. Each time the work absorbed him more, and that made him neglect some critical aspects of college, making him feel stressed since for no reason could he lose the scholarship. And while it was true that he had made good friends, at times like this, the only thing that really comforted him was talking to Ander. And not only did it happen when he felt melancholic, but also when something good happened to him, the first thing he thought about was sharing it with him.

It was after eight at night, and due to the time difference, Omar knew that it wasn't a good time to dial him, however, when he entered _WhatsApp_ and saw that Ander was online, he sent him a message.

**_< Are you awake? >_ **

He saw the two blue signs and the text at the top that said _"writing";_ he waited impatiently, but after a couple of minutes, the answer hadn't yet come. Letting out a resigned sigh, he put the phone down on the table and looked for something to eat. Ten minutes later, the beep on his cell phone made him leave dinner on the kitchen counter and run to read the message.

**_< Yep, I couldn't sleep. How r u? >_ **

****

**_< Pfff... I had a fucking day 😣>_ **

Almost immediately, his phone started ringing, so with a grateful smile, he murmured:

_-Hola, nene..._

_-What happened? Are you okay?_ -Omar heard him ask in a worried tone.

_-Yeah, it's just that... there are days like today when being so far away makes me miss my family a lot... and... miss you too._ -He confessed, feeling suddenly very sad.

_-Omar..._

_-Don't listen to me, it will pass. Since you've called me, tell me, how’ve you been?_

For almost an hour they were chatting as in the old days; as they did so, he imagined that Ander was there by his side and not more than five thousand kilometers away, so closing his eyes, he could almost see him resting his head on his lap, while he stroked his hair. With that image in mind, little by little, he began to feel better; that was the effect that Ander had on him, whenever he heard his voice, everything seemed more bearable.

When he heard Ander suppress a yawn, he decided it was time to hang up, but before doing so, he muttered:

_-Hey, thanks._

_-Why?_

_-For calling me, for listening to me._

_-Whenever you need to talk, don't hesitate, just call me. No matter at what time, okay? I'm here…_

_-I know._

For a few seconds, they were both silent until he heard Ander say:

_-Omar?_

_-Yes?_

_-Nothing, forget it... sleep well._

*******

April came and with it spring break. Omar felt refreshed and lighter. He had passed his exams with an outstanding performance in almost all subjects, and in just a couple of days, he would be arriving to Madrid. When he thought about it, he couldn't help but feel excited, but also nervous because he didn't know for sure how things would go with Ander.

The night before he left, he packed his suitcase and went to take a shower. He wanted to feel relaxed to be able to sleep as much as possible since he would be flying during the day, and due to the time difference, he would arrive to Madrid at night. While he was showering, he began to hear one after another the beep of the mobile. When he got out of the shower, he put a towel around his waist and went straight to check his phone.

There were more than twenty _WhatsApp_ message notifications. They came from a group chat that Lu had just created with the title " _party time";_ she was throwing a party just the next day, on the occasion of her birthday. She threatened to spend it all because, according to her, it wasn't every day that she'd turn twenty-two. Guzmán, Nadia, Samuel, Carla, Rebe, and Valerio had already confirmed and awaited Ander's response.

His arrival to Madrid was supposed to be a surprise, and the only two people who knew about it were Nadia and Lu. So when Lu spread the news in the group chat, he just shook his head and ended up smiling. He knew that she had done it due to the enthusiasm to see him, so in the end, he sent an emoticon of the little monkey covering his eyes with a message of: _"I want to see all of you and hug everyone."_ He was happy to think that he would see all his friends very soon, but especially Ander, and that made him feel extremely excited.

Almost immediately, he began to receive all kinds of responses, telling him how happy they were to see him again. While reading the messages and laughing at the group's jokes, a call came in, lighting the screen with the name of Ander.

_-Hi, Omar... Is it true what Lu said? Are you traveling to Madrid tomorrow?_

_-Hola, nene. Well, yeah… it was supposed to be a surprise but since Lu is unable to keep a secret… I guess it doesn't matter anymore. Will I see you tomorrow at Lu's party?_

_-Ya…_

_-What happens? You don’t seem excited at all..._ -He chuckled, asking half-jokingly, half-seriously.

_-Omar... There's something I must tell you._

_-What is it?_ -He asked curiously, putting him on speaker so he could continue dressing.

_-I ... Well... I wanted to tell you that... I'm dating someone._

At that moment, he sat on the bed, unable to articulate a word. He had never been knocked out before, but right after hearing Ander's statement, he felt as if he had. Silence flooded the room, he felt disoriented, and a moment later, that silence gradually transformed into an annoying buzz that stunned him, while he thought that at any moment his heart would leap from his chest because of how fast it beat.

_-What?_ –He managed to murmur.

- _I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how to do it._ –He answered in a guilty tone.

_-Since when?_

_-Three months ago... I hooked up with him a couple of times a while ago, and then... things changed..._

_-You're kidding..._

_-Omar... I'm sorry._

_-And when were you planning to tell me, huh? At the party, when introducing ourselves? Or were you planning to keep it to yourself? Hopefully, I wouldn't realize it... Que hijo de puta..._

_-Omar, I..._

_-We talked several times during these months, and you couldn't tell me? Why? You could have... you know what? Forget it, no longer matters._

_-Omar, please forgive me. I would like to explain it to you in person._

_-What's the point? Also, on second thought, I'll arrive exhausted from the trip, so I probably won't go to Lu's party._

_-Omar..._

_-I've to go._

And without waiting for an answer, he ended the conversation. He felt betrayed; he never expected that Ander hid something like that from him. Of course, it pained him to know that there was another guy in Ander's life, but even to some extent, he understood. What he couldn't forgive him was that he had kept quiet during all this time. They were supposed to always promise to speak the truth, and even at some point, they had talked about that possibility but hiding it wasn't part of their deal.

When he remembered all the times that Ander's image had appropriated his thoughts during those lonely moments, he could only feel overwhelmed. The only thing Ander had been honest about was when he had said he couldn't do this anymore.

_-Ja!_ -He spat a bitter laugh. Unlike other times, at that moment he couldn't even cry, although he felt a tightness in his chest that didn't let him breathe, he wasn't able to shed a single tear.

The flight to Madrid was relatively calm, with some turbulence at times, but nothing to worry about. Throughout the flight, he kept thinking about the conversation he had had with Ander, and the more Omar thought about it, the more convinced he had part of the blame fell on him.

Thanks to the more than seven hours of flight, he had enough time to recall the conversations that he and Ander had had during the previous months, and he realized that on more than one occasion, he had pressured Ander not to end their relationship.

Now that he knew the truth, those brief silences, those times Ander had doubted and ended up keeping silent... now they made all the sense in the world. And it wasn't that he was justifying him, no… what Ander had done was bullshit; he just had to admit that due to his eagerness to not broken up with him, he hadn't wanted to see reality.

_-Joder!_ -He whispered, closing his eyes for a moment before removing his seat belt and getting up from his seat to retrieve his small suitcase from the upper compartment of the plane's cabin.

They had landed five minutes earlier at Madrid-Barajas Airport. While he was walking towards band seven to pick up the rest of his luggage, his mobile finally caught a signal, vibrating again and again. Omar glanced up at it and saw several notifications of emails, and messages from the WhatsApp group that Lucrecia had created, asking if he had already landed. He ignored them and continued on his way, but a few moments later, he received a voice message from Samuel to let him know he was arriving at the airport.

After hanging out with Ander the night before, and coming out of the initial shock, he had phoned Samuel to tell him what had happened. It turned out that Samu had no idea what was going on with Ander, though after listening to him, he thought he knew who the guy Ander was dating was. In the end, Samuel had convinced him to stay with him during his stay in Madrid.

_"...In that way, you could visit your parents and return to my house when you feel that you can no longer pretend that everything is fine. Seriously, Omar, I understand you, and you don't need to go through this shit on your own."_

When he left the arrival gate, Samuel was leaning against one of the columns, waiting for him. They hugged each other and then headed for the parking lot.

_-How are you?_ -Samuel asked him as he drove back to his house.

_-I've had better days, Samu, but I'll have to take it easy, because if I take it seriously... I'm going to end up crying._

_-You're right... Well... what? This is the plan; we're going to leave your luggage, you'll take a shower, change your clothes, and then we leave._

_-Leave? Where?_

_-What do you mean where? To Lu's party... What you need is a drink and spending time with your friends._

_-Are you kidding me, Samu? The last thing I need is to see Ander with... What did you say his name was?_

_-Nacho…_

_-That... with that guy who, to top it all off, you said he's a handsome guy... No, no, no ... I don't plan to go there. You go; surely Carla will be waiting for you._

_-And what? So you plan to stay locked up all these days without seeing anyone? Because of Ander? Of course not, I won't allow it... I won't leave you alone here. You and I will go to that party; we'll get drunk and have a great time. Ander doesn't have to know how much this has affected you._

While listening to Samu, reluctantly, he smiled, and with a huff, he agreed.

_-Okay, but I do warn you... if I drink until I lose consciousness, don't say that I haven't told you, capullo!_

_-That's what I'm talking about!_ -Samuel replied, laughing.

Omar punched him affectionately on the arm while trying to hide his nervousness with a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

An hour later, they both arrived at Lu's house. As they approached the door, the noise of the music became more and more intense, as well as the feeling of emptiness that was taking over his chest. He couldn't back out anymore, but every second that passed, he became more convinced that this was a mistake. _"Was he ready to see Ander with another guy?"_

_-Hey! Smile, coño! -_ Samuel admonished him, elbowing him.

Lu's scream, -when she saw them enter-, caused several of those who were dancing nearby to turn to look at them.

_"Agh! What now? A triumphal entry... thanks, Lu_!" -He mentally cursed while forcing himself to smile.

_-Omaaaaaar! You're here, cari!_ -Lu yelled, hanging on his neck, then giving him a brief kiss on the lips.

Omar hugged her tightly. He hadn't realized how much he had missed this girl until he had her in his arms.

_-Hi Lu. I'm glad to see you too, love._

Before the others came to greet him, Lu whispered in his ear:

_-You and I will talk later, I just found out..._

Omar nodded briefly and then turned to hug Rebe, who was already in front of him with a huge smile on her face.

_-Hola, maricón! I really wanted to see you!_

- _Rebe..._

As he hugged her, he saw Valerio lift a bottle of champagne towards him: _-Here's to you! Guapo!"_

Carla approached him, and after giving him a quick kiss on the cheek, she disappeared with Samuel. Finally, Guzmán and Nadia got closer. While talking to his sister and brother-in-law, he looked askance looking forward to seeing Ander _. "Either he hadn't gotten there yet, or he was away from there hanging out with that guy."_ -He thought bitterly.

They were talking about school and his life in New York; when, after a while, Ander's name popped up in the conversation, Omar grimaced. He looked first at Nadia, who had a sad expression and then at Guzmán.

_-There's not much to say, right?_

Guzmán looked at him and touched his shoulder briefly.

_-I'm sorry that things between you and Ander are over, macho._

- _Yeah…_ -He shrugged as if he didn't care and muttered, - _That's okay, dude. That's the way it is._

And since the last thing he wanted was to talk about his love issues with Ander's best friend, he changed the conversation.

_-Well and how is my favorite niece? When can I see her?_

After a while, he excused himself and left them to go for a drink. He needed fresh air, so he started walking towards the garden. There, he lit a cigarette and began to smoke slowly. As he did so, he noticed his hand trembling, so he cursed.

When he finished the cigarette, he turned to extinguish the butt against a nearby ashtray, but he bumped into someone, spilling the drink that the guy had in his hand.

_-Oh! I'm sorry, dude...!_ –He mumbled, but the apology died on his lips when he saw that Ander was with that guy.

It was only a few seconds, but with that, he had enough to scan him. As Samu had told him, the guy was a handsome man. He was slightly taller than Ander, with green eyes, light brown hair, and an athletic body. He fixed his gaze on Ander and saw the surprise reflected on his face and something else that he couldn't define.

The voice of the stranger brought him out of the trance he was in, when showing a white smile, he replied:

_-That's ok; it was an accident._

_-Omar... I thought you wouldn't come._ –Ander intervened, clearly uncomfortable.

Omar looked at him and, with a huge effort, managed to smile.

_-Well, as you can see, in the end, I decided to come. Lu wouldn't have forgiven me..._

_-I see... Eh..._ -Ander tried to speak, but couldn't spin a complete sentence; it just seemed like he was speechless.

So Omar cut him off and giving him the best of his smiles, he turned to the guy who was looking at Ander.

_-I'm Omar, nice to meet you. And I'm sorry about the drink..._

_-Don't worry, man. I'm Nacho._

Omar nodded and, clearing his throat, mumbled:

_-Well, I'll see you around._ -And without looking at Ander again, he entered the house.

What had just happened seemed like something out of a surreal scene; Ander's face of bewilderment and _... "Guilt?"_ He, behaving like nothing at all happened with that guy who was now with Ander, and as background music, a song that invariably reminded him of Ander; and, to complete the picture, people, having fun around him while he was feeling worse than shit, but hiding it perfectly.

_-Jodeeer!_ -He hissed under his breath as he headed for the furthest bathroom he could find. He needed to be alone even for a moment, since he was tired of continuing to pretend, of having to keep a stupid smile on his face, it was just exhausting.

As soon as he found the bathroom, he closed the door behind him and breathed. He went directly to the sink and poured cold water on his face, avoiding looking in the mirror because he knew what he would find if he saw his reflection. He wiped a towel over his face to dry himself when someone opened the door.

_-There's someone here!_ -He shouted. But seeing who it was, he hardened his features and his tone of voice.

_-What are you doing here?_

Ander was strangely looking at him but didn't reply immediately. He got close enough to him that Omar could be able to feel his breath.

_-Omar... wait. Don't go. -_ Ander murmured, taking him by the arm when he saw that he was heading for the door.

_-What? What do you want, Ander?_ -He confronted him, suddenly feeling how his willpower went away; he no longer felt like continuing to pretend that none of this affected him.

Omar heard him give a slight gasp and then kissed him. As soon as their mouths brushed, Omar was unable to reject him. He closed his eyes, letting himself be done, exploring his mouth like a hungry animal. He was only able to feel; the softness of Ander's lips against his, the way Ander took hold of his bottom lip, sucking on it. Those slight bites that made him feel an electric current go through his body until he reached his cock. He was afraid of the intensity of his love for him.

But those lips no longer belonged to him; now there was someone else by his side that could kiss and touch him, feel him, and delight in him whenever he felt like it. So summoning all his willpower, he brought both hands to Ander's chest and gently pushed him away. He didn't understand why Ander had kissed him, and although he felt lost without him, he needed to stand firm because otherwise, he would collapse at any time, and he didn't want to show Ander how much his actions had hurt him.

_-I'm very sorry about everything that's happening, Omar. I... to be away from you... I don't know... It's hard._

_-Well, not as sorry as I am, believe me. But in the end, you decided that way, so I'll be fine eventually. So now, why don't you go with your boyfriend and leave me alone?_

Ander looked at him, and Omar could see anguish and pain reflected in his gaze. _"I'm not the only one who feels like shit. Good."_ –He thought, devastated, leaving him alone.

A few hours later, and several drinks in, his head was spinning. Not even alcohol could make him forget. He was leaning against the bar counter drinking whiskey when he saw them. They were sitting next to each other, Ander looked thoughtful, but the other guy seemed not to notice; at some point, the latter wrapped him in a quick hug to draw him to him and kiss him on the lips, but Ander quickly pulled away.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

At that moment, a thought crossed his mind making his blood run cold. From the way Ander had kissed him a moment before, Omar was sure Ander still loved him but, _"What if Ander ended up falling in love with that guy?"_ He couldn't control the fear that gripped him just by thinking about it. He looked like a nice guy, he was handsome, and it was obvious he was crazy about Ander, so it wasn't unreasonable to think about it.

He looked away and decided he had to get out of there. He couldn't bear to spend another minute watching how someone other than him could kiss Ander with such familiarity. Feeling sick, he took the glass with what was left of his drink and went out into the garden.

The footsteps of someone approaching made him turn. For a few seconds, he and Lu looked at each other, but neither of them said anything. Omar returned his gaze to the glass in his hands and drained the rest of the contents.

_-I think I need three more of these..._

_-Even if you take the whole bottle, it won't be enough to make you feel better, honey._ –As she said that, she gave him a gentle shoulder push.

_-This is all a nightmare, Lu. I guess I shouldn't feel that way since we've been too long apart, but still, part of me was holding on to the idea of having a life with Ander._

_-I understand, believe me. The same happened to me with Guzmán, only that mine with him was never real, now I know. When I see the way he looks at Nadia... he never looked at me like that, even though I'm very happy for them now. But with you, it's different, because although Ander is the most hermetic person on the planet, he cannot hide his love for you. It was a surprise for everyone to know that he was dating someone._

_-So what? That doesn't change anything._

She looked at him and then said:

_-You just need to let time pass. Who knows what happens in the future? For now, let's go for a few shots and dance. I want to take advantage of all the time you are here._

Letting himself be dragged by Lu, they both went straight to the bar.

*******


	7. Playing with fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, Chapter 7 is ready!  
> I hope you're doing fine. ;)  
> As always, I wanna thank you for taking some of your time to read, comment, or leave kudos; it makes me very happy.  
> xoxo 😘

**Chapter 7: Playing with fire**

**_(Ander)_ **

_An hour later_

_-Do you wanna talk?_

_-What? –_ The memory of Omar's lips on his vanished as soon as he heard Nacho ask the question. He looked away from the drink that he was holding and unconsciously ran his tongue over his lips. When his _"boyfriend"_ smiled at him, he couldn't help but feel guilty.

_-So, he's the guy…_

He didn't answer. Ander knew perfectly well what Nacho was talking about; however, he emphasized:

_-The one who sent you the postcard._

A few weeks ago, he and Nacho were in his room hanging out. They had finished watching the second season of the German series _Dark_ on Netflix. And, both were shocked, so they were discussing possible hypotheses when he saw Nacho pick up the book he had been reading the night before, and start flipping through it.

Inside was the postcard that Omar had sent him, and for some reason, he didn't want to delve into his subconscious mind why he had decided to use it as a bookmark. When Nacho found it, he looked at him curiously.

_-Omar?_

He remembered taking the postcard out of his hands, slipping it back between the pages of the book, and putting it on the bookcase.

_-That's nothing…_

_-Are you sure?_

_-Yes, I'd already forgotten it was there._ -He had lied to him.

Nacho hadn't insisted, but from the way he looked at him, Ander knew that he hadn't believed him.

He left that memory behind and came back to reality, deciding to tell him part of the truth. Before speaking, he took a deep breath and mumbled:

_-Omar and I were together for a while, but a couple of years ago, he left and... long-distance relationships don't work, so… that's it._

Nacho looked at him in a strange way, remaining silent. It seemed like he was waging an internal battle to find the right words until Ander finally heard him say:

_-Do you want me to go?_

_-What?_ -He asked, surprised.

_-I don't know, Ander, but from the way you reacted when you saw him, I think there are still unfinished things you should solve._

Ander looked away. _"What was I supposed to answer him? No… don't worry, I've screwed it up, and Omar doesn't even want to see me"_ –While thinking of a coherent answer, Nacho spoke again:

_-Listen, it's clear that something is bothering you. You've been thoughtful and much quieter than usual._

_-It's not that... really; it's just that I was surprised to see him here._

_\- Ander, don't freak out... If he really is part of your past, you should close that cycle and move on ... And I don't know, maybe the fact that I'm here makes you feel like you can't do it._

_-Nacho… I…_

_-Look, either way, I feel tired. So if you don't mind, I'd like to go rest. See you tomorrow, okay?_ -And approaching him, he gave him a quick kiss on the lips as he stood up.

Ander said nothing, just nodded and watched him walk away. After a few minutes, he heard Guzmán's voice while he sat next to him.

_-What's going on with you, huh?_

_-Why?_

_-Jodeeer Ander! Really, macho? From the look on your face... well, it's not for less after what you've done._

He glanced sidelong at Guzmán and snapped his mouth in annoyance.

- _I'm just going to tell you two things..._

_-Not now, Guzmán... I've enough problems to still have to listen to you._

He wasn't in the mood for his friend to lecture him on how he was managing his life. He already had enough with the disapproval glances from the rest of his friends when they saw him arrive with Nacho, besides all that was happening with Omar.

_-Vale, de puta madre, Ander!_ _If you don't want to listen to me because you know that what I'm going to tell you is true, then look over there._ -He insisted, pointing with his index finger towards the bar.

Reluctantly, he did as Guzman asked and cursed. Lu was with Omar, and judging by their faces, she seemed to be comforting him while he put a hand to his face to wipe away the tears, but by his clumsy movements, it was evident that he was drunk since he also couldn't hold himself standing. He was half-leaned on the bar, holding a glass in one hand. He watched as Lu took it away and grabbed him by the arm while calling Valerio.

_-Joder!_ -He hissed under his breath, rising from the couch to address them.

When he was in front of Lu, she gave him a murderous look and immediately put her arm around Omar's waist, letting his arm rest on her shoulders.

_-Let me help you, Lu._ –Ander offered, trying to hold Omar, but Valerio was faster and grabbed him first. They both began to walk down the wide hallway between the amused glances of some onlookers, so he had no choice but to follow them silently.

When they reached one of the rooms that seemed to be for guests, Valerio and Lu left Omar on the bed, and she turned to him.

_-Look, Ander, I appreciate your concern, but it seems to me that you are the last person that Omar wants to see. Also, he has drunk so much that he's almost unconscious, as you can see... So let me take care of the situation._

At that moment, Omar began to babble unintelligible words, so Valerio approached him, and proposed with his characteristic impudence:

_-I can make him recover! We could give him a little of this magic dust, and in a few minutes, he would be like new..._

Seeing that Valerio took out a little plastic bag with cocaine, Ander couldn't contain himself, so he faced him:

_-But are you fucking out of your mind? Or is it that so many drugs already stunted your neurons, huh?_

_-Valerio, don't even think about it! Why don't you go to your fucking room and let me figure this out?_ -Lu scolded him, and with that look, it was enough for him to take two steps back.

_-Okay... I see that you reject my help, so I'm off; I've nothing else to do here! –_ And after saying that, Ander saw him come out humming a song.

_-Lu, let me stay with him._ -Ander insisted as he looked at Omar, who had already fallen asleep again.

_-Ander... I don't know... I don't think it's a good idea. I'll call Samuel because Omar is staying with him._

_-Lu, you know as well as I do, that right now, Samuel is with Carla and won't pick up the phone. We can't leave Omar alone, he's very drunk, and you won't want to miss your birthday party to take care of him. Please... let me do it._

He saw her put a hand to her forehead, weighing her options and then letting out a sigh of resignation, he heard her say:

_-Okay, but if he asks me tomorrow, I'll tell him that you got in here without me knowing._

_-Thanks…_

She looked at him with a disapproval gaze.

_-You are very lucky that Omar still loves you... I hope you open your eyes before it's too late._

When he was alone, he walked over to the edge of the bed and sat next to him. Omar was lying on his back, breathing deeply; his lips were slightly parted, and his face was relaxed. Asleep as he was, he looked much younger. Ander smiled tenderly, and following his instincts, he stroked Omar's bottom lip with his thumb, feeling immediately as if an electric current ran through his body, remembering what those lips were capable of doing to him. Omar didn't even move; he was too drunk to realize what was going on around him.

He closed his eyes and leaned against the head of the bed. He was confused; he needed to order his thoughts because if it was based on his feelings, he was clear where they would take him.

It had been nine months since that unforgettable week in New York, and then everything had gone to shit. He knew that he was solely responsible for what was happening. By the time he got carried away by that outburst of rage and decided to start something with Nacho hiding it from Omar, he had betrayed his trust. Still, he continued with that farce coping relatively well until he saw him again.

He could still remember the helplessness he felt when Omar told him that he wouldn't be able to travel to Madrid for Christmas. He wasn't trying to justify himself, but keeping a relationship at a distance was much easier said than done. And that's how his relationship with Nacho had begun that night.

Nacho was a nice guy, funny and good looking; with him, everything was smooth and uncomplicated, and also, it seemed that he was willing to accept what he offered. And although he had tried to fall in love with him, he hadn't been able to achieve it, that spark was missing, that feeling of fullness, that intensity that he felt when Omar was close to him.

He still remembered how different everything had been with Omar. Not a single month had passed when he already had it clear; he was deeply in love. And this night, when he saw him again, the hunger of being with him, the need to feel him, the feeling of possessiveness that overwhelmed him reappeared... everything was still intact as if it was the first day.

He let out a sigh and rubbed his eyelids. _\- Jodeeer!_ -He cursed under his breath. Whatever decision he made, he knew that he would inevitably end up hurting people who loved him.

During these past few months, he had tried with all his might to forget the light that shone in Omar's eyes when they looked at each other. He tried not to remember what he used to feel when those lips caress him, and for some moments, he had been able to achieve it. However, the moment he saw him again, it was as if he had been lost during all these months and had returned to find himself through Omar's gaze.

Now he knew that their story couldn't end like this, when he saw Omar again it was clear that he didn't want to lose him; That love couldn't fade, for that reason when he saw that Omar entered the bathroom, he followed him without caring about the consequences. He wanted to tell him how sorry he was for hurting him, he wanted him to know that he hadn't stopped loving him for a single moment, but Omar was not willing to listen to him.

Omar's movement at his side brought him out of his thoughts. He turned to look at him and saw him put his hands to his head while letting out a groan. After a few seconds, Omar tried to get up, but he was still so drunk that he fell back onto the mattress.

_-How do you feel?_ -He asked, tapping him lightly on the shoulder.

Omar was strangely looking at him; it seemed as if he was trying to decide if he was real. And a moment later, Ander confirmed it.

_-Andeeer? Are you really here?_ -Omar asked, dragging out the words, touching his face as if making sure he wasn't dreaming.

_-Do you want some water?_ -As he said it, he stood up and grabbed a small bottle that was on the dresser.

When he returned to Omar's side, helped him up, and brought the bottle over for him to take a sip. For a few seconds, he did nothing more than look at him, and when Omar turned his attention to him, he cleared his throat before speaking.

_-Omar... Could you forgive me? I'm an asshole. I fucked it up._ -He murmured, stroking Omar's chin.

But Omar seemed not to be listening, he raised both hands to surround his neck and dropped his head on his shoulder; Ander could smell the alcohol on his breath.

_-Why, Ander? I feel so lonely…_ -He babbled, making no effort to hold back the silent tears that were wetting his cheeks.

Seeing Omar so vulnerable, and hearing him speak like that, only made him feel worse since he was responsible for his sadness. He blinked rapidly, trying to push away the tears that had begun to form in his eyes, but it was impossible to contain them. He approached Omar until he touched his forehead with his, and said in a whisper:

_-Forgive me, please... Omar, I love you, and I shouldn't have hidden what was happening. How I felt... Maybe if I had opened up with you, things would be different now._

He felt so bad knowing how much he had hurt him that he couldn't continue talking. He was only able to hold him in his arms while in silence, he begged Omar to forgive him.

_-It's you I need..._ -He whispered against Omar's neck, unable to hold tears back.

At that moment, he felt Omar cling to him, so he separated enough to be able to look at Omar's face. There was an unfathomable sadness in Omar's gaze that reminded him of years before that had also hurt him because of his illness. All he wanted was to erase these past three months and hug him until Omar could forget what he had done to him.

He began to kiss Omar slowly and sweetly, delighting in the sensations that this provided him. As he did so, his thumb caressed Omar's cheek, and he was grateful to feel that Omar reciprocated. He enjoyed every second, biting Omar's bottom lip as he thrust his tongue in to deepen the kiss. Although he was dying to do something else, he knew he had to stop. Omar was in no condition to make love, so he lay down and cradled him in his arms. Being with him like this felt like coming home. He wanted to enjoy that feeling of well-being that overwhelmed him, but finally, tiredness overcame him too.

_-But what the hell...!?_

The altered tone of voice, coupled with a sudden movement, made him wake up abruptly, feeling the rapid beat of his heart. He blinked and tried to focus, sitting up on the bed. Omar was in front of him with a puzzled expression on his face as he was massaging his temple.

_-Why am I here? What happened last night?_ -He asked, raising his voice.

_-Omar, calm down. You drank too much last night, and we brought you here. I stayed with you and... You and I talked. Do you remember?_ -As he tried to explain, he took him by the shoulder in an attempt to reassure him, but Omar shook himself out of his grasp by standing up. Fear washed over him as he saw the cold expression on Omar's face.

_-What are you saying? You and I have nothing to talk about._

_-But Omar, please..._

_-No, Ander. I don't know what story you made up, dude, but last night I was drunk, and I didn't know what I was doing. Nor do I remember that we talked, but I'm not interested in knowing._

_-Omar... at least let me talk._

_-I said no. You were very clear when you told me that you couldn't continue with this; besides, you're with this guy, so I don't know what you're playing at._

_-I'm not playing at all._

_-I see... You're not playing... And what are you doing, then? Do you want us to be together these days, and when I go, continue with your boyfriend as if nothing happened? Fuck you, Ander._

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

He watched Omar turn his back on him while he put on his sneakers and then left the room, slamming the door. Ander bit his bottom lip and closed his eyes, wishing it had all been very different.

In that room, and completely alone, he began to cry without making any noise, barely opening his mouth, letting the tears flow freely. There was nothing left for him to do, just accept that he had lost Omar forever.

*******


	8. There’s a crack in my heart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, chapter 8 is ready!  
> I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.  
> xoxo

**Chapter 8: There’s a crack in my heart**

**_(Omar)_ **

_A week later_

It had definitely been a bittersweet week and very different from what he had imagined when he booked the plane ticket a month ago. During those days, he had taken advantage of spending as much time as possible with his family and friends. Mama was happy to have him back in Madrid even if it was only for a few days and she pampered him preparing his favorite food. On the other hand, Baba couldn't hide the joy of seeing him again either, and despite his grim personality, his eyes had moistened as soon as he saw him enter through the door.

During that week, his routine had been to manage the time to catch up with Samu, Rebe, Lu, and of course, with Nadia, Guzmán, and the little Marina, who was his adoration. And although at first, his niece had been somewhat sullen with him, after a couple of hours, she already treated him as if she had known him forever. He had never thought that he might have a soft spot for children, but the moment he heard Marina call him uncle with that sweet little voice, his heart warmed. In the afternoons, he returned to his parents' house to help them with the store, and in the evenings, the whole family gathered for dinner and hang out.

Everything would have been perfect if not for Ander. Just remembering the conversation they had had a day before he flew to Madrid, added to what happened at the party, made him feel bad. He didn't really want to think about it much either because he wasn't even clear about the feeling that predominated in him. For a few moments, he felt depressed, and the next second made him want to have him in front of him to punch him. The only thing he was sure of was that he was an asshole and didn't want to see him, so all the times, Ander tried to contact him, the same times he had ignored him.

Apparently, his subconscious protected him from the ridiculous that he had starred in the party since he had very vague memories of that night. It wasn't until he spoke to Lu the next day that he found out everything that had happened and how he had ended up sleeping in the guest room with Ander by his side. He had arrived at Samuel's house, depressed and with a terrible hangover. Not even during his dealer days did he remember having a binge like that night, so throughout the next day, he had felt his head hammering, and everything was spinning around him, not to mention that he had been throwing up like he was possessed during all day long.

He snorted in annoyance and forced his mind back to the present. Nadia and Guzmán had to attend a University event that afternoon. When he had heard his sister ask her mother if she could take care of Marina, he immediately offered to babysit. His niece liked him a lot, and he wanted to make the most of it since he only had two more days to return to New York. He crossed the street, and when he was in front of the house, he knocked on the door and waited patiently.

_-Omar! You've arrived early!_ -Nadia hugged him and gave him a quick kiss before closing the door and heading towards the kitchen.

_-Look who's here, Marina! Your uncle Omar, yay!_ –She told her daughter, who was dressed as a princess sitting in her baby chair while Guzmán tried to get her eating.

_-What's up, macho! How you doing?_ –Guzmán greeted him, shaking his hand.

_-How's the prettiest princess?_ -He asked, approaching Marina to kiss her on the crown of the head. She had curly black hair like Nadia's with thick eyebrows, but big and expressive green eyes like Guzman's, which made her extraordinarily beautiful.

_-Uncle Omaar... Look at my dress! It's the same as Elsa from Frozen!_ -Marina shouted with her peculiar voice tone, proudly caressing the blue fabric with sequins. Even though she wasn't yet three years old, her diction was almost perfect, which made her much funnier, because she looked like a tiny adult.

_-She is crazy about that movie... she even knows the dialogues..._ -Guzmán whispered, winking at his daughter.

- _Okay, I'm going to finish getting ready, and in ten minutes, we're leaving._ -Nadia declared, disappearing towards her room.

_-Hey, thanks a lot for taking care of Marina, Omar._

_-Oh, I'm happy to be able to spend time with her, Guzmán._

_-I hope you continue thinking the same in two hours_. -He laughed. - _I warn you that this girl has enough energy to play throughout the afternoon without stopping._

_-Don't worry; I'll manage. Isn't that right, Marina? We're gonna play all afternoon, right?_

The girl laughed and continued playing with the food.

_-By the way, Omar, I wanted to ask you if you have no problem so that after the event, I take Nadia to dinner._

_-No, it's okay. I don't have any plans for tonight; I can stay here as long as necessary; go and have fun without rushing._

_-Okay, perfect. Either way, Marina should go to bed at seven at night, so once this hurricane falls asleep, you can relax._

_-Yeah, don't worry._

Twenty minutes later and after all the recommendations Nadia told him, they finally left him alone with the baby. They sat on the carpet, and the little girl began to pull out all her dolls and toys, scattering them on the floor. They played for a long time until she got tired and wanted to watch a movie.

_-I want to watch Frozen, uncle!_ -Marina exclaimed as she ran to get the movie.

At that moment, the doorbell rang, and puzzled, he went in search of his niece to carry her before heading to the door. When he opened it, he was stunned. In front of him was Ander.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-What are you doing here?_ -He asked in a tone that left no doubt that his presence was not welcome.

_-Omar... I..._

But he didn't have the chance to listen to Ander's answer since as soon as Marina saw him she stretched her tiny arms towards him while trying to get out of his embrace.

_-Uncle Andeeer!_ -She cried excitedly.

_-Hi, Marina. How are you, sweetie?_ -Ander greeted her with a broad smile.

He never thought that Ander could have such a good relationship with the girl. Still, it was evident because of the behavior of that little traitor, who, in a matter of seconds, let go of him so that Ander could carry her, while she was hugging him and filling him with kisses.

_-Marina, come on, let's watch Frozen, Ander has to go_. –He explained while trying to hold her again.

_-Nooo!_ –Marina answered, starting to pout as her eyes filled with tears.

It was incredible how easily his niece could cry, so trying to reassure her, he murmured:

_-Calm down... don't cry. Didn't you want to watch the movie?_

The girl nodded, wiping the tears that gushed down her cheeks.

_-Yes, but I want my uncle Ander to watch it with us..._

He was about to refuse when he heard Ander.

_-Of course, I'd love to watch that movie with you._

After that, it was no longer possible to say anything else. So reluctantly, he let Ander in and went to sit in the furthest sofa as he looked at Ander walk in with Marina in his arms as she smiled happily.

_-Joder!_ -He hissed as he glared at Ander.

The next hour and a half that the film lasted, he only looked askance at Ander and Marina. The girl had sat on Ander's lap to watch the movie while singing in each of the scenes that warranted it, and he seemed quite relaxed, laughing, and enjoying the moment.

When the movie ended, he got up from the sofa and addressing his niece said in a tone that didn't warrant discussion:

_-Okay, it's time for you to dine and then go to bed. Say goodbye to Ander, come on._

_-Would you like me to stay with you while you have dinner, Marina?_ –Ander intervened, looking askance at him.

Of course, the comment made the girl's face light up and nodding, and she clung to Ander's neck. It was clear that he wouldn't get rid of Ander until she fell asleep, so there was no point arguing about it. He looked at Ander with a gesture of annoyance, and without saying anything else, he went to the kitchen.

The tension between the two was almost palpable. Ander was sitting in front of him while Marina hummed without paying much attention to the food.

_-Come on, open your mouth..._ -He asked his niece with a spoon in hand, but she seemed reluctant to obey. She just laughed and shook her head, gazing at Ander like she was bewitched.

_"Great... you've lost your head over him, too, haven't you?"_ –He thought, looking at his niece, who seemed to have forgotten that he existed since she didn't take her eyes off of Ander.

_-Let me try..._ -Ander offered, making a gesture for taking the spoon. Of course, needless to say, that with Ander, the girl had devoured every last bite.

Once Marina had dinner, she kissed Ander goodbye and let Omar carry her to take her to the room. He put her pajamas on and was about to put her into the bed when he heard her say:

_-My mom always says I should brush my teeth before sleeping, uncle._

Omar rolled his eyes, and with a smile, he nodded.

_-Of course, how could I forget it... come on, let's brush your teeth._

Once she did, he carried her to the bed and tucked her in. As much as she tried to stay awake, her eyelids closed, so he kissed her and waited. It was a matter of minutes for her to fall asleep.

_-I love you, uncle..._ -She said between yawns.

Hearing her, he couldn't help but openly smile as he thought this little girl had stolen his heart.

When he returned to the living room, his features hardened when he saw Ander sitting in one of the armchairs with his hands clasped.

_-So? Can you go now or do you intend to watch Marina's sleep too?_ –He scoffed at him.

_-Omar, please let me talk._

He let out a sigh of annoyance and then crossing his arms, he mumbled:

_-I'm listening._

As he looked at Ander, he noticed a slight tremor in his voice as he began to speak. One of the reasons he hadn't wanted to see him was because he knew himself and knew how weak he could be when it came to Ander.

_-Omar, I'm an asshole dude..._

_-Ha! Tell me something I don't know._

Ander continued, ignoring his sarcasm.

_-I was wrong... I shouldn't have hidden you how I felt._

_-Yeah... But you did. And not only that, but you also started a relationship behind my back. Wouldn't it have been easier to tell me and not make me believe that you and I could have a future?_

_-I know... And that's why I want to apologize_

_-Leave it, Ander..._

_-Omar, please... I don't want to lose you. If I can't get us back together, at least let me stay a part of your life... even if it's as friends._

As he listened, he couldn't help but feel betrayed, so he blinked furiously trying to clear his eyes of the tears that had started to appear. Ander took two steps towards him to touch him but didn't allow it. He didn't know what to think... _Ander wanted them to be friends... What joke was that?_

_-I can't imagine that you are no longer part of my life..._

_-Really, dude? I don't think you're telling me this when you spent the last three months fucking someone else. At those times, I don't believe you thought much about me._

_-When I saw you again, I knew how much I fucked it up._

_-I see…_

_-Please don't go like this, Omar._

Ander said that last sentence in a whisper, and Omar could see the despair on his face. As much as he wanted to, he was incapable of hating him. He wasn't sure if it was the words themselves, the tone in which Ander had said them or simply the love he felt for him, but he felt helpless when each cell in his body began to react to Ander without being able to avoid it.

He also couldn't imagine Ander ceasing to be a part of his life, let alone parting in that painful way as well as after all they had been through together, so he made a decision right then.

_-Okay..._ –He mustered.

Ander widened his eyes in surprise and wiped away the tears with the back of his hand.

_-Are you talking seriously?_

Before answering, he took a deep breath to fill his lungs.

_-Yes. After all we've been through, I wouldn't want to go back to New York and know we won't talk to each other again... You fucked it up and hurt me... a lot, but I believe you when you say you're sorry._ –He confessed, biting his bottom lip.

His heart had begun to pound much faster than usual, so he tried to control himself before continuing to speak.

_-But... I need time, Ander._ -He had a hard time looking at his face because he looked as broken as he felt, and he ran the risk of forgetting everything and starting to kiss him.

_-Sure..._ -Ander mumbled. - _Whatever you decide as long as you allow me to show you how important you are to me._

Omar nodded and then heard Ander ask him:

_-Friends, then?_

*******


	9. Facing the truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 9 is ready. I decided to split it in two because I wasn't quite sure how the second part had turned out, so I'll make a few changes and hope to upload the next chapter a little earlier.  
> Also, I want to say that with your feedback, you're helping me to build this fic. So, I'm glad about that!  
> As always, thank you for your comments, kudos, or just for reading.  
> xoxo

**Chapter 9: Facing the truth**

**_(Ander)_ **

_That same night_

He had it very clear that the last thing he wanted was to be Omar's friend, but it was either that or lost him permanently. As he anxiously awaited Omar's response, he saw him shrug and make a sort of grimace.

_-I don't know; I guess we can try._ -He heard Omar's answer at last.

He let out the air he had been holding inadvertently and nodded, feeling relieved.

_-How many more days will you be here?_

_-I'm leaving the day after tomorrow._

_-Really?_ -He replied, without thinking, feeling disappointed.

A week had passed since Omar had arrived to Madrid, and after the party, Ander hadn't spoken to him again until this afternoon. Every time he had tried to reach him, he had failed, and if it hadn't been for Guzman, Omar would most likely have returned to New York without being able to speak to him.

But Guzmán knew what was happening and how he felt about it; for that reason, a few hours before, Guzmán had called him to tell him that Omar would be babysitting Marina. Even though there was nothing he could do to make up for his mistakes or make up for that lost week, he could take advantage of these two days to show Omar how sorry he was.

_-You know how this is, I only got a week off, and I have to go back to work on Monday._

He nodded again and clearing his throat, asked:

_-Would you like to meet tomorrow?_

Omar shook his head.

_-I can't dude, tomorrow my parents will make me a farewell dinner and all that stuff..._

_-I see..._ -He answered in a whisper without hiding his disappointment. However, he insisted again. - _We could see each other later._

_-I don't know, Ander... All this is fucking weird. Anyways, what do you want us to see each other for, if we're already talking now?_

_-Please, Omar... I want to see you, know how you are doing at school, and just sit down to chat as we used to do... because I don't know when I'll see you again._

He saw Omar ponder his words and then slowly breathe out, softening his gaze.

_-You can go to my parents' house if you want. Nadia, Guzmán, and Marina will be there... and as it seems she is crazy about you... even calling you uncle... you will surely have a good time._

Hearing him reference Marina, he couldn't hide a broad smile; Nadia and Guzmán's daughter liked him a lot, and he had to admit that if it hadn't been for that incredible girl, he wouldn't be talking to Omar right now.

- _Okay... What do I have to bring?_ -He asked, widening his smile.

*******

He came home feeling a little lighter. For a few moments, while talking to Omar, he thought that he couldn't even regain his friendship, so when he heard Omar accept his proposal, he felt grateful. He knew that he didn't deserve it because he had misbehaved, and knowing Omar, it wouldn't be easy to get back together, but he would do everything in his power to get it no matter how long it took.

The light on his cell phone turned on, indicating that he had a new message; he looked askance only to confirm what he already knew. It was Nacho.

**_< Hey, I'm already in my flat ...>_ **

****

**_< Okay, I'm going there>_ **

He went up the stairs two by two and entered his room. He headed to the closet and took out the sweatshirt that Nacho had lent him one day that he had forgotten to wear his; he folded it and went back downstairs.

_-Ander? Are you going out again?_ -He heard his mother ask him from the kitchen.

He stopped halfway and saw her approach him.

_-Hello, mom, I thought you were already in your room. Yes, I'm going out, but I'll be back soon._

_-Is everything alright?_ -She asked, looking at the sweatshirt in his hands.

_-Yes, don' worry. I'll see you later, okay?_ -And kissing her on the cheek, he left the house.

He hadn't seen Nacho since the night of the party when he said goodbye to him so that he could _"settle"_ this thing between him and Omar. The next day he had called him to meet, but Nacho had traveled to Barcelona to settle a family matter and would be out all week.

Although they had spoken a couple of times and had texted each other during those days, Ander hadn't told him what was happening since he wasn't going to break up with him by phone. Nacho was a nice guy, and the least he could do was tell him the truth head-on, although he had no idea how he would react.

Less than twenty minutes later, he rang the bell and waited. Almost immediately, Nacho opened the door and smiled at him.

_"Jodeeer!"_ –He mentally cursed when he saw how handsome he looked. Although physically he had always seemed attractive to him, he had never been able to turn on that spark between them, and if he was honest with himself, he thought it was a shame because he was sure that if Omar didn't exist, Nacho would be the right man for him. He was handsome, with a sense of humor, intelligent, human... and although he had tried, he couldn't command in the heart.

_-Hey, hello, pretty boy!_ \- Nacho greeted him, leaning towards him, but Ander turned slightly, and Nacho's mouth just brushed the corner of his lips.

_-Nacho... Can we talk tío?_

He saw Nacho make a gesture of surprise, but quickly recovered himself, muttering:

_-Hey, what's up? Why are you so weird?_

Even though he knew he should break up with him, he felt terrible for letting what was supposed to be a one-night stand turn into a three-month relationship. Fooling himself that he would eventually fall in love with Nacho, but the moment he had seen Omar again, he was unable to continue pretending. And the worst part was that he knew that Nacho didn't deserve it... there was no doubt that he was a fucking selfish dude.

_-Is that my sweatshirt?_ -He waved his hand, pointing to the garment.

_-Yes, since last time I was going to return it to you, but I forgot about it._

_-But I told you that you could keep it._

_-I'd prefer to return it to you..._

_-I see... And from what I suspect now is a good time to do it, right? For any particular reason?_ -Nacho smiled at him, but his smile didn't reach his eyes.

At that moment, he mustered his courage, and taking a breath could only murmur:

_-Nacho, I'm sorry... I really tried. You are an amazing guy, but I can't keep doing this._

_-You're leaving me..._ -It wasn't a question, but an affirmation and Ander could see the sadness reflected in his eyes when he said it.

_-I'm so sorry..._ -And he was serious, when he saw Nacho shake his head while laughing bitterly.

_-It's because of that guy, right? Omar? Did something happen between you two at the party?_

Ander couldn't answer; he looked down for a few seconds and then forced himself to look at him again.

_-You said that everything was over between you two._

_-Nacho, I..._

Ander saw him make a gesture with his hands, indicating that he didn't want to hear. He looked sad, and when he spoke, it only made him feel even worse.

_-Jodeeer! I'm an asshole... because from that night you came to my apartment I knew that there was someone else, and even so I fell in love with you knowing that you didn't feel the same way for me, but I convinced myself that with the time you would manage to love me... Because I didn't want to accept that the best thing that happened to me wouldn't have been real at all._ –He lamented.

Ander didn't know what to say to him; all he wanted to be was for the earth to swallow him, so he was silent after hearing his confession. This whole thing was bullshit, and he couldn't even comfort Nacho because what could he say to make him feel better?

The only one responsible for what was happening was him because he hadn't been able to stop thinking about the consequences of his actions. The only thing on his mind was the need to get over Omar, and he had used Nacho to try to get it. And worst of all, at the moment of truth, when he saw Omar at Lu's party again, he forgot everything except the need to be with him. And what had he achieved with all this? He had lost Omar, and now, he was hurting Nacho, who in all this time had only given him good things.

_-I should have known... It was selfish of me to start a relationship with you when I wasn't ready. Forgive me, I mean it._

They were both silent for so long that Ander assumed the best he could do was leave. He felt awful for having screwed up like that, hurting with his actions not only Omar but Nacho as well.

_-I think I'd better go._ –He mumbled.

_-Yes, it's the best._

_-Nacho, I'm really sorry..._ -He repeated, and almost immediately, he raised a hand, pretending to put it on his arm. Still, Nacho took two steps back and raised his eyebrows showing a gesture of total disbelief, and then he spat out:

_-Tell me something, so is he back for good?_

Nacho's question took him by surprise. He didn't feel like talking about Omar with him. However, he was forced to answer.

_-No, he'll be gone in a couple of days._

Ander saw him raise his face to look him in the eye.

_-Then will you have a long-distance relationship again? Really, dude?_

_-No. He and I are no longer together, Nacho. What I told you has nothing to do with him..._

_-Jodeeer! What do you think I am, a dumbass? Please, Ander!_

_-It has to do with me... with what I feel. And it's not fair that we stay together when I can't give you what you deserve._

The way Nacho looked at him was enough to let him know he didn't believe him but didn't say anything else. He just opened the door and muttered:

_-Good night, Ander... and I hope that nobody ever does to you what you have done to me._

*******


	10. What we could've been

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, chapter 10 is ready. I hope you enjoy this as much as I did.  
> Thanks as always for reading, commenting, or leaving kudos.  
> xoxo  
> 🌈

**Chapter 10: What we could've been**

**_(Ander)_ **

_The next morning_

Ander could barely sleep for a couple of hours the night before, which is why he woke up with a headache and in a very bad mood. He shook his head, trying to forget the memory of the nightmares that had tormented him; in them, he relived, again and again, the break up with Nacho, and when he went away in search of Omar, he wasn't able to find him.

He decided to take a shower to clear his mind and to be prepared to see Omar knowing in advance that it would be a difficult afternoon. He was nervous about showing up again at Omar's parents' house after so long.

Nadia opened the door with Marina in her arms, and immediately the girl pounced towards him, kissing him while she tried to put a princess crown on his head. Ander handed Nadia the basket of fruit he had with him so that he could hold the girl.

_-It's for your mother, I had thought about bringing a bottle of wine, but I figured it would be a bad idea._ -He joked.

_-Thanks, Ander. Marina, don't do that, sweetie! The crown is for you, not for your uncle Ander. Come on, take it off of him._ –She asked her daughter while stifling a laugh, asking Ander for forgiveness with the lips.

_-Nah, don't worry, it's okay. I look handsome, right, Marina?_ -He answered, smiling at the girl.

The three entered and immediately the characteristic smell that gave off the stews that Omar's mother was cooking in the kitchen transported him to some years ago when he and Omar first went to dinner together at that same house.

Yusef was sitting in the living room chatting with Guzmán and Omar, and when he saw him enter with his granddaughter in arms, he got up walking towards them.

_-Hello!_

_-Hello, boy. I didn't know you were coming._ –He affirmed, looking askance at Omar, who had already come to his side.

_-Baba, do you remember Ander? I have invited him to eat with us._

_-Of course, I remember, welcome, Ander._ –He answered, shaking his hand.

Marina jumped into the arms of her grandfather, who received her with a big smile.

_-I'm going to see if your mother needs help._ -Yusef explained, heading towards the kitchen.

_-Hey…_ -Ander greeted, looking at Omar first, and Guzmán later, who from the living room looked at him, clearly pleased.

_-Hola, macho! It's good to see you here._ –And addressing Omar, he jokingly demanded: _-Omar, you hadn't told me that you two had already settled your problems._

Ander rolled his eyes at the inappropriateness of Guzmán's comment and Omar, on the other hand, only nodded briefly before muttering:

_-Well, sort of..._ -And looking at Ander again, he scoffed: _-That crown fits you fucking great!_

Ander had already forgotten the freaking crown, so he quickly took it off and shrugged, handing it over to Guzman.

The attitude of Omar's parents towards him didn't go unnoticed. When Imán came out of the kitchen, she approached him and smiling, hugged him before thanking him for the basket of fruit he had brought. During the meal, both were interested in knowing about his health and seemed happy to see him there. But on the opposite, although Omar didn't openly ignore him, he did behave cold and distant with him, and even though he understood him perfectly, it didn't stop hurting him.

Guzmán joked and looked quite relaxed; it even seemed that the relationship with his in-laws couldn't be better, since at some point during the meal, Yusef addressed Guzmán calling him _"son."_ For a second, when he heard him, he wondered if Omar's parents would have accepted him in the same way as they did with Guzmán if he and Omar would have formalized their relationship. Fantasizing about it only made him feel melancholic since, as he watched them, he realized how much he would have liked to be part of that family.

When they finished eating, Omar's mother got up from the table to bring the dessert and Omar offered to help her, which made Marina want to imitate him, and in her eagerness to get up from her seat, she spilled a glass of water that ended right in Ander's pants.

_-Oh, I'm so sorry, Ander!_ -Nadia apologized.

_-It's okay; it's just water. I'll go clean myself up, and I'll be right back._

Ander finished drying himself as best as he could, and when he came out of the bathroom, he heard Omar's mother say his name, so he stopped and inadvertently listened to the conversation.

_-Omar, what's going on, son? Why are you so sad? Have you argued with your boyfriend?_

_-No Mama, it's not that. Also, Ander is no longer my boyfriend, he's with someone else, and now we are just friends._

_-Is that the reason why you're so quiet?_

_-No, it's because I'm going back tomorrow and I'm going to miss you all so much._

_-I'm your mother, and I know that there's something else that makes you sad._

Ander heard Omar released a sigh and then he said to his mother:

_-Well, maybe a little... but it will pass. I'm sure of it, so don't worry about me._

Ander no longer wanted to continue listening, so he hurried back to the dining room since the last thing he wanted to be was for both of them to be aware of his presence.

An hour later, Nadia and Guzmán said goodbye because it was getting late, and Marina had to go to bed early. Guzmán approached him before leaving and asked in a low voice so that no one else could hear:

_-What's going on between you and Omar, dude?_

Ander shook his head, and Guzmán said:

_-Okay, call me later, and we'll talk._

Ander was going to answer him when he heard Omar say goodbye to his parents.

_-I'll come tomorrow before I go to the airport._

Once Guzmán and Nadia left, he took the opportunity to say goodbye, too; He needed to speak to Omar alone, and so he thanked Imán and Yusef for their hospitality and left the house. Omar had stayed inside, so he crossed the street and waited while lighting a cigarette.

While smoking, he remembered all the times that in the past, he had been standing in that same place, wishing he could spend even ten minutes with Omar. Many things had changed since then, except the intensity of his feelings for him, so he needed to get him back.

A short time later, Omar left the house, and when he saw him, he crossed the street to reach him.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-What are you doing here? I thought you were already gone_. –He said in a cold tone.

_-I was waiting for you. Can we go somewhere for a drink?_

_-Ander, we agreed to be friends... Why do you want to complicate it, dude?_

_-I know what we agreed, and I'm not asking you for anything other than chatting, please, Omar._

Omar put a hand to his temple before answering.

_-Okay._

They went to the cafeteria where Samuel used to work, the same place where he, Guzmán, and Polo spent so many afternoons drinking beer and enjoying life without complications before everything went to shit, and Polo killed Marina.

He remembered when he summoned Omar in that same place, and Guzmán fucked it up with that shit of _"gay power,"_ making Omar furious with him for revealing his secret. He couldn't help but giggle at the memory, causing Omar to give him a questioning look.

_-I'm sorry, I remembered the time that Guzmán wanted to show us his support with that shit of "gay power" and you got outraged…_ -He explained as they took a seat facing each other at the same table.

_-I do remember it well. At that time it seemed the biggest of my problems that my parents found out... and look at them now..._

Because the cafeteria was almost closing, there were not many people in the establishment, so almost immediately a waiter came to take their order. He ordered a dark beer, and while Omar explained to the guy how he wanted his coffee, Ander focused on the movement of Omar's lips as he spoke, delighting in the sensations that he began to experience when remembering what that mouth was capable of doing to him. It was amazing how, despite so much time, his body kept reacting to him like it was the first time.

What was not overlooked, either, was the waiter's excessive cordiality towards Omar, since while he had barely looked at him, he was smiling openly at Omar and didn't lose any detail of what he said. When the guy finally left, he asked:

_-What time do you leave tomorrow?_

_-At noon._

_-I can take you to the airport._

_-Thank you, but Samuel is going to do it._

_-I could go with both of you..._ -He insisted.

_-I think it would be better if you didn't._

_-I see..._ -Ander lowered his head. _–Omar, what can I do to make you forgive me?_ -He looked into Omar's eyes and slowly brought his fingers closer to Omar's hands, which were on the table. As soon as he felt his touch, Omar leaned back, removing his hands, as if his touch burned him.

_-Look, Ander, since you told me what was happening, I've had time to assimilate it, and I think that although the way you ended our relationship was not the best, in the end, it was all for the better. I'm not going to lie to you, there were days when I wanted to hit you for lying to me all these months, but today I accept it._

_-But Omar..._

_-Listen to me. It seems to me that we both cling to make this relationship work, but it is impossible being so far. Even accepting that we could see other people if we wanted to hook up and look how it ended..._

_-I'm not with him anymore._ -He spat out, unable to contain himself.

Omar couldn't hide his surprise upon hearing it, but he immediately hardened his gaze.

_-So? Do you think that by telling me this, something will change between us?_

_-I don't know. I just wanted you to know it._

_-Well, Ander, the fact that you're done with him doesn't change anything, if you decided so, it's up to you, and I have nothing to do with it._

_-Omar, listen to me, I know I screwed it up and it's hard for you to forgive me, but I just want you to know that I'm not going to give up._

As soon as he finished speaking, he saw Omar's face soften a little, as well as the tone of his words.

_-Nene, listen, I don't hold grudges, and I don't have any hard feelings... it hurts, yes, I won't deny it, but I'm sure that I'll overcome it, so stop thinking about it, please._

_-But I don't want you to get over it! I mean I don't want you to forget about me, I would like..._

The waiter's presence cut him off to keep speaking, so he leaned back against the back of the seat, feeling desperate.

The guy left the beer in front of him and gave the cappuccino coffee to Omar along with some cookies, _"on the house,"_ -he said. The way he was flirting with Omar was shameless, but Omar seemed to be amused, as he played along with him, laughing.

_-Is there anything else I can bring you?_ -He asked, looking at Omar.

_-Jodeeer! No, we're fine._ -Ander replied, looking at him visibly upset.

When they were alone, Omar looked at him, suppressing a smile, but said nothing; on the contrary, he took a sip of his coffee and a bite of the cookie, murmuring _"mmm... yummy"._

Under normal circumstances, he would have found it amusing, too, he might even have joked about it, but tonight he was in no mood to put up with an asshole who was flirting with Omar in front of him. He knew that situation was foolish, but he couldn't help feeling jealous.

He let it pass because he wasn't going to waste the little time he had with Omar with that shit, so he focused the talk on more neutral topics such as college, work, and friends. As they talked, the two of them became so engrossed in the conversation that things flowed between the two of them, almost like the old days. Even more, than once, they both found themselves laughing out loud as they recalled some funny anecdotes.

Among other things, Omar shared that he had thought about the possibility of reducing his working hours to dedicate more time to college, but that would mean earning less money and having to look for a roommate, which he didn't want at all because he would lose his privacy by sharing the apartment.

At that moment, the annoying waiter approached them to tell them that the coffee shop was about to close, but seeing the murderous look that Ander gave him, the guy said nothing more and retraced his steps towards the kitchen.

Ander put a couple of bills on the table, and they both left the cafeteria. Outside, the weather was fresh but pleasant, he took out a cigar offering Omar another one, and while they were smoking, they started walking at a slow pace.

Samuel's house was relatively close to Ander's, so they continued walking in silence until they arrived.

_-Well... I think it's time to say goodbye._ –Omar's voice was a mix of hesitation and sadness.

Ander released the air slowly as he looked him in the eye and couldn't help but think that everything that was happening seemed like something out of a lousy drama movie.

Omar took two steps towards him making the distance between the two shorter, and thus having him so close, the characteristic smell of Omar's perfume flooded his nostrils making him remember those nights they shared in New York, where everything was summed up to the love that they felt for each other and the purest and crudest desire.

_-Adiós, nene._ –Omar hugged him so hard that he could only imitate him, and at that moment, Ander thought that he would never want to let him go. _"How could he have been so stupid thinking that he could live without him? Why had he been carried away making such a visceral decision?"_

Ander's mind was racing, trying to find the right words to make everything go back to the way it was before, but it was useless. Omar was not going to back down, and he wasn't willing to screw that night up, so resigned, he was only able to murmur " _bye,"_ before feeling how Omar released him from his embrace and without looking back, he went up the stairs towards Samuel's house.

*******


	11. Your memory always goes where I go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Here's chapter 11.  
> Thanks for commenting, leaving kudos, or just reading.  
> I hope you enjoy it as I did.  
> xoxo 😘

**Chapter 11. Your memory always goes where I go**

**_(Omar)_ **

_One week later_

He had completely lost track of time because he was immersed in his thoughts. He put the notes in his backpack and headed for the front door. When he came out of the library, it was getting dark. Still, he was satisfied because his progress in the project he needed to deliver the following week for the audiovisual script class was really good at this point. It was the first time he had tried to create a script, and he had found it cathartic to portray his experiences mixed with a good dose of fantasy on a piece of paper.

He decided to cross the campus through the tennis courts, and as he did so, the image of Ander standing at the airport entrance assaulted him again, making him relive once again the brief conversation they had had.

_Samu had parked his car near the entrance to help him unload his luggage; they had hugged each other tightly, and his friend had made him promise to come back soon. Once Samu was gone, he began to walk towards the entrance doors. He hadn't even taken ten steps when he saw him. He had believed that when they said goodbye outside Samuel's house, it would be the last time they would see each other, but he had been wrong._

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_The day before his departure, it had been one of the most difficult ones of his life, as he had mixed feelings that he didn't know how to handle. And having spent all that afternoon with him, hanging with his family, had only intensified the pain and nostalgia he felt for everything that could be but never was._

_"Ander... what are you doing here?" -He had asked in a weary tone. Ander had no idea how difficult it was for him to accept that they remained friends._

_"I had to see you, Omar. I couldn't let you leave without trying one more time…"_

_"We've already talked about this, dude... Why do you want to complicate it? Or do you prefer that we stop talking definitively?_

_"No! I don't want that…"_

_He remembered Ander's helpless face, refusing that possibility. It was hard for him, too, but he couldn't trust him again, at least not now. Ander had hurt him a lot with his actions, and although he knew that the best thing would be to break all ties with him, he wasn't able to do so because, even though it had hurt a lot, he still loved him._

_"Okay… then, I think I'd better go, my flight will be leaving soon."_

_He had made a move to pick up his suitcase when Ander had approached him to block his path, grabbed his arm, and looked into his eyes. Without giving him time to react, Ander had pressed his lips against his in a clumsy movement. After a few seconds, he had felt how Ander deepened the kiss._

_Not responding to Ander's kiss had been the most challenging test he had had to overcome so far, so he had barely managed to stay still waiting for him to give up. And so, it had been. At first, he felt how Ander released him from his embrace, and a moment later, he had taken two steps back. His eyes were red and wet..._

His stomach crunched, and it was until then that he remembered he had eaten only an apple and a cup of coffee at noon. He looked at the clock and put aside the memory of Ander. If he hurried, he would hopefully catch the campus cafeteria still open and eat something different, since he honestly didn't feel like ordering Chinese food or pizza for the fifth day in a row. He had arrived from Madrid a week ago, and his fridge was still empty because, between the apathy and his bad mood, he had put aside the purchase of the groceries.

_-Hey! Look who's here! My favorite Spanish boy!_ –Keith came out of nowhere, making him jump. He put an arm around Omar's shoulders and smirk a carefree smile.

_-Fuck, Keith! You scared the hell out of me, dude. For a moment, I thought it would be one of those crazy guys from some fraternity..._

_-You watch a lot of movies, Omar._ -He joked, letting out a laugh showing his perfectly aligned teeth. _-Do you have any plans for tonight?_ -Keith looked up at him with those playful blue eyes, raising an eyebrow.

_-Yep... I have an appointment with Netflix, my pillow, and my sofa until I fall asleep._ -He replied, smiling helplessly since Keith's laughter was highly contagious. _–But before, I hope to find the cafeteria open because I'm starving._

_-Your plan sucks. You know it, don't you? It's Friday, and you intend to stay locked up in your flat? What's happening to you, huh? When I met you, you used to be more fun._

Hearing him, he shrugged. He didn't intend to tell him that he didn't feel like going out because he felt devastated by everything that had recently happened in his life, even if he managed to cover it like a fucking liar.

_-Besides, the food here is disgusting._ -He continued, making a gesture of displeasure. _-Come on, I'm going to take you to a place, they make the best burgers in all of Brooklyn there, and then you and I are going to party. Jules, Matt, and the others are already there._ -He explained, referring to the rest of their friend group.

Before he could find a credible excuse to get him to leave him alone, Keith was practically dragging him to the parking lot, so he had no choice but to get carried away.

He had met Keith when the semester started because both of them were interested in Digital Editing, and they got paired up to do a project for the class. Just as Omar, Keith's major was Audiovisual Communication, and even though he had seen him at the campus a couple of times before, he had never spoken to him until that one time.

The memory of seeing Keith for the first time, was very clear to him because he had reminded him of Ander, when he used to have longer hair, revealing those curls which he liked so much. The one thing that was so ironic was that, as he got to know him a little better, he noticed that apart from the physical features such as the curly hair or the face shape, he had some mannerisms that were quite similar to his ex-boyfriend's. 

The one thing that was a great differentiator was that instead of those hazel eyes, Keith had super blue and expressive eyes that contrasted with a really dark brown hair; he also had a piercing on his left earlobe and one more on his brow, plus he had several tattoos distributed on both arms.

In one of the first parties they had gone together, after having some drinks, Keith had approached him and started to flirt with him. Omar knew Keith as bisexual because, on one occasion, they had talked about it, but even so, his move had still taken him by surprise.

_"You know Omar, all night, I've been wondering what it would feel like to kiss you"_ And, just like that, he had leaned forward to give him a soft kiss on the lips in front of everybody, without caring at all what anyone would think about it. It wasn't a passionate kiss but tender and soft. And it had happened so fast he didn't know how to react at the moment. He still clearly remembered the way he had looked at him afterward, and what his words had been: _"That felt good, didn't it?"_

_“Yeah, it was nice…”_

_“Would you like us to go somewhere else?”_

_“Keith, I’m dating someone. I’m sorry, man.”_ -He had answered, thinking of Ander.

How dumb he had been… just by that time, Ander had already forgotten about him and started having a relationship with another guy, without Omar even imagining it.

Keith raised an eyebrow as a gesture of incredibility, since not he or any of his friends had seen him with any guy, so Omar felt the need to briefly explain the situation about Ander. After listening to it, Keith had smiled, which made a pair of dimples appear on his cheeks as he shrugged his shoulders to make the whole scene seem a little less dramatic _. “Well, he’s so fucking lucky to have you, Omar.”_

_-Hey, ground control to Omar!!-_ He shouted in a funny tone, slightly punching him on the upper part of the arm, interrupting his memories and bringing him back to reality.

_-I’m sorry, what?_ \- He looked at him ashamed, trying to catch up in the conversation.

_-I asked how your trip to Madrid went._

_-Oh, I’m sorry, dude. It’s just that I haven’t slept very well these last days, and I feel a little off, kind of distracted._

_-Yeah, I could tell. Anyway, how was it then? -_ He insisted looking at him directly, because he knew that theoretically, Omar had traveled back to Madrid to see Ander.

_-It was fine… You know, I spent those days being with my family and friends._ -He lied, trying to smile, and changing the subject quickly because he didn’t feel like telling his friend Ander had betrayed him.

_-Well, what? Is it still far from here? I’m starving!_

Almost ten minutes later, they parked the car near Fulton Street and walked towards the restaurant.

_-Shake Shack? Really?_ -Omar joked, denying with his head, trying to be funny.

_-What? I didn’t lie to you when I said they were the best burgers; besides, we don’t need to spend that much money this way._

Keith wasn’t wrong. Those hamburgers were delicious and cheap, but because of that same reason, the place was always crowded, and there was nowhere to sit. Even though at that moment, sitting was the least of his worries since he was literally starving and in the end, he thanked his friend for the choice he had made. 

When they finished having dinner, he felt way better. Between the great company and excellent food, his mood improved considerably, and the idea of going to a party didn’t sound so bad anymore. Maybe hanging out with his friends, getting drunk and dancing until his feet hurt, was exactly what he needed to get Ander out of his head.

_-Well… where is the party at?_

_-That’s the attitude I’m talking about!_ -Keith shouted while drumming on the steering wheel with his fingers. - _Well technically, it’s a frat party, but Matt got invited and obviously extended the invitation for us…_ -He smiled proudly as he turned the music’s volume up and starting the car making the tires screech against the pavement.

Sitting on the passenger’s seat, he adjusted the seatbelt, lit up a cigarette, and pulled down the window, feeling how the night’s fresh air caressed his face. Letting himself go, he closed his eyes and started singing to the top of his lungs, but out of nowhere, Ander’s image flooded his head. _“Jodeeer! Fuck off!!!”_ – He cursed mentally, whipping away a tear that began to form on the corner of his eye.

He didn't like those typical frat parties at all. Still, he decided he was going to have a great time, so it didn't really matter having to stand a bunch of drunk college students acting stupid if that meant he could turn off that annoying loss sensation that didn't even let him breathe for a while.

Keith parked the car on a nearby street, and even though they were far enough, they could still hear the music playing, accompanied by people shouting and cheering from the inside of the residency. As they walked towards the house, Omar looked around him and smiled while thinking about that being the typical scene of a Hollywood movie about American teenagers. The backyard was full of both guys and girls drinking and dancing to the music, but his friend group was not among them.

Inside the house, it seemed like a rave party. Some people chatted loudly because of the music, played "beer pong" and, some others were so drunk that it was basically impossible for them to keep standing up. As he made his way through the people, having Keith walking in front of him, somebody handed him a cup full of whiskey, which he accepted gratefully.

On the way he heard a clearly drunk guy because of the way he was speaking, complaining with another guy, telling him he didn't understand the reason why his girlfriend had dumped him; at that moment, he had a _déjà vu_ , reliving his last party at Lu's and how pathetic it all had been, so without giving it a second thought, he gave his drink a big sip trying to block that memory. Finally, both of them made it to the corner of the living room, where Matt, Jules and the rest of them waited for them.

_-You’re finally here! -_ Jules yelled excitedly, hanging onto his neck.

_-Hey, beautiful, you’re stunning!_ \- He smiled, kissing her on the cheek.

Jules had been one of the first friends he had made, and he had a really special love for her. She always had a smile on her face and was definitely the most fun of them all.

A while later, and after some drinks, Keith got out a little bag with marijuana and rolled a joint; three puffs later, he passed it to the others. Since his dealer days, he hadn’t smoked weed again, but that night he felt like he needed it, and so, without hesitation, he took the joint between his fingers and inhaled deeply.

The next hours were a little blurry, like a nebula in his head, and he was just conscious of a pleasant feeling of well-being that ran through his entire body. He felt relaxed, and it seemed as if everything around him moved in slow- motion as he listened to his friends’ laughter enjoying the moment. He was sitting on a fluffy mat, leaning against the couch with Keith beside him, as Jules absently ran her fingers through his hair.

_“Call Out My Name”_ by _The Weeknd_ started playing, but unlike other times, he felt like his story with Ander inspired the lyrics. He didn’t know the reason, but he could feel the music with much more intensity, so he closed his eyes and started humming the song. Almost immediately, and without being able to do anything about it, Ander flooded his mind.

Suddenly, melancholy and loneliness took over him, making him believe it would be impossible to get over him. He missed him so much he felt a constant void on his chest, which wouldn’t go away with anything. He let out a sigh and tried to smile, but as a cruel joke of fate, or as if he had invoked it by thinking about him, his mobile began to vibrate. He looked at the screen and read: **_< R u up? I really miss you, Omar…>_**

While he was not entirely drunk, it was a fact that he was not sober; so he knew it would be a terrible idea to talk to Ander at that time because as fucked up as he was, he would end up confessing how much he missed him and he knew he would regret it the morning after that.

As he read the message for the third time, Keith ran his arm through his back and glanced at his phone while he had it in his hands.

_-Is that your boy?_ -He asked curiously 

Omar put his phone in his pocket and slightly turned to the side so he could look at Keith face to face. _“Jooooder! How much you remind me of him...”_ – He cursed mentally when their eyes met.

_-He’s not anymore._ -He confessed, lowering his tone. 

He saw how Keith raised his eyebrows, being surprised at his response. For some seconds, he didn’t say anything; he just looked down to his lips, which made Omar run his tongue through them as a reflex.

_-So, is that good or bad? -_ He muttered in a hoarse voice.

As he listened to him, Omar made a gesture that almost seemed like a slight smile.

_-I’d say it’s complicated…_ -He managed to say.

Keith smashed his plastic cup against his and raised it to his lips. As he watched him, an idea began to take shape in his head, and not giving a shit about anything, he kissed him.

*******


	12. My skin asks for you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Chapter 12 is ready!  
> As always, thanks for leaving a comment, kudos, or just reading. It makes me so happy when I receive a new notification from AO3!  
> So, thanks for that.  
> This time was kinda tough writing this chapter, but I think it's necessary for the development of the plot. So, I'll be delighted to read your thoughts about it.  
> xoxo 😉

**Chapter 12. My skin asks for you**

**(Omar)**

_At the Party_

_-Hey, you two! Get a room! -_ He heard Matt screaming to make himself be heard over the music, dragging the words. Keith cut off the kiss just to show his middle finger, causing the rest of his friends to laugh.

_-Leave them alone!_ -Jules intervened, winking at them.

Omar winked back at Jules, and then looked askance at Keith, trying to smirk, but in the end, it looked like a kind of a grimace rather than a wide smile. He mumbled a _"brb"_ and got up looking for a bathroom. As he tried to push his way through the crowd, he looked back and saw Keith stare at him, taking a drag of the cigar he had just lit.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

He needed a moment alone; he needed to clear his mind and decide if he wanted to continue down that path with Keith. He didn't care what his friends thought about them, and it wasn't that they were scandalized by seeing them together; he knew that Matt was joking and whatever decision he made, none of them would question anything about it.

He crossed the living room, avoiding more than one drunken guy, trying to open the doors that crossed his path, but they were all closed until at the end of the corridor he managed to find one open. He entered the bathroom and plopped down on the floor, leaning against the door. At that moment, his cellphone started to vibrate against his thigh, reminding him that he hadn't responded to Ander's message. He let out a sigh and slowly pulled the phone out of his pocket to read the new message. 

**_< You left me in "seen..." I assume you are busy, right? >_ **

He put his hands to his head and then covered his face with them _. "Jodeeer! It seemed like Ander wouldn't give up that easily."_ He thought of a good answer, but he couldn't think of anything but to send him to hell or tell him how much he missed him too. In the end, he settled on a short, concise message, but one he knew would be enough to discourage him, at least for that night.

**_ <I came to a party with a friend, we'll talk later>_ **

He sent the message and muted the cellphone putting it back in his pocket. He got up and turned on the tap to pour cold water on his face, and after a few seconds, he decided to go back with his friends.

Keith was still where he had left him and was now chatting animatedly with Jules. Matt and the others were dancing a couple of meters away, too drunk to realize that he had returned, so he took the plastic glass he had left on the table and sat on the couch next to Jules.

When their gazes met, Keith spread his arms, motioning for him to leave the couch and sit in the space between his legs. He didn't hesitate for a second and did so, feeling how immediately Keith wrapped his hands around his waist. He leaned against Keith's chest, and the three began to chat as if this new proximity between both was typical.

After a while, the party was boring enough for them to decide to leave. Jules asked Keith to take her home since she wouldn't go back with Matt as drunk as he was, and she didn't feel like asking for a cab, so the three left the house and headed towards the car. On the way back, his friends began to sing each song of the playlist that was playing at the time, so Omar decided to lean his head against the back of the seat and close his eyes for a moment. His mood got worse every minute, and he knew that Ander had a lot to do with it.

A slight shake on his shoulder woke him up. Keith watched him amused while he tried to open his eyes. He turned to the back of the seat, only to check that Jules was gone, and when he looked through the window, he realized that Keith had stopped in front of his apartment.

_-Lo siento, tío, I didn't notice when I fell asleep._ -He apologized, rubbing his eyelids to fully wake up.

_-Yep, you're a heavy sleeper!_ -Keith scoffed. - _We could have done a concert here in the car, and you wouldn't even have noticed it. By the way, Jules asked me to tell you not to forget that you’ll have lunch together tomorrow._

Omar nodded, making a mental note of it. A few seconds later, and wide awake, he asked:

_-Hey, would you like to go up?_

_-Are you sure about this, Omar?_ –Keith watched him a little doubtfully.

_-Yeah, why are you asking me? Come on, let's go._ –And assuming Keith would follow him, he opened the door, heading towards the entrance of the building.

When they entered the flat, Omar went straight to the fridge and pulled out two beers, handing one to Keith, who had been leaning against the kitchen counter.

_-I don't have food, but I do have beers._

Keith said nothing, just laughed with that characteristic tone, and taking a big sip of his beer, he left it on the kitchen counter. Omar mimicked him and smiled.

_-I had never entered your flat, but it's just as I had imagined._ -He declared as he walked towards the huge window to admire the view of the Brooklyn Bridge. With no curtains, the moonlight illuminated the wide space making the ring of his ear glow every time he moved his head.

Seeing him there, with his back to him, the memory of Ander in that same place several months ago, suddenly assaulted him, making the sensation of loss deeper. He tried to suppress that memory that only made him feel deeply sad, and with determination, he advanced towards Keith.

Sensing his presence, Keith turned, looking at him with those deep blue eyes fixed on him, as if waiting for him to explain what was going through his mind. Omar held his gaze but said nothing; instead, he raised both hands to rest them on his cheeks and with the thumb began to gently play with his mouth. When Keith parted his lips and took a small bite, he pulled his finger away and replaced it with his lips. He started kissing him softly at first and then more intensely as he felt Keith reciprocate.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

That same night, a few hours earlier.

The clock marked four in the morning, and he was unable to fall asleep. A week had passed since Omar had left and nothing had improved, on the contrary, it seemed that when Omar had accepted his proposal to be friends, it had only been to get rid of him. He looked at the clock again and gave a sort of snort when he realized that not even five minutes had passed. In New York, it was ten o'clock at night, so he decided to send a message to Omar hoping to be able to speak to him.

When he checked that the two signs were in blue, he put the phone aside and tried to calm down. Omar had already read his message, and he was nervous to know what he would reply; he closed his eyes, and his mind transported him a week ago when he had gone to the airport to see him.

_He sadly remembered how Omar had remained impassive when he had kissed him. Omar had never reacted like that before, since in the past when their lips touched, they both lost track of everything except the feelings they experienced for each other. But when he was aware that Omar wouldn't kiss him back, he had taken two steps back to look at him, and what he saw in Omar's eyes scared him. It was a mixture of determination and disappointment, so losing his little sanity, he had said:_

_"Omar... I know I fucked it up, but I want you to understand how difficult it was to know that you wouldn't come..."_

_"Are you really telling me this, dude? Joder Ander! Are you going to hold me responsible for your actions? You know? You aren't sixteen anymore."_

_"I know that... I'm not saying it's your fault, all I'm saying is that it wasn't easy..."_

_"And do you think it was easy for me? Don't you think that I also had opportunities to send everything to hell and still put my feelings for you first, instead of starting a relationship with someone else like you did? Joder, Ander! Mature once and for all and stop behaving like an asshole!" Do you think that by coming here and kissing me, you are going to fix everything you did?"_

_"No... But I just don't know what else to do" -He had answered, vigorously wiping his eyelids to avoid shedding the tears that threatened to come out, since he didn't want Omar to see him cry once more._

_"You should have thought about that before... I don't know what you expect me to do, dude."_

_And so, after saying those harsh words, he had turned around, making him feel helpless for not being able to do anything to hold him back._

He pushed away those painful memories and looked at his mobile once more. Omar had ignored him, so in a fit of anger, he began to type by moving his fingers quickly on the mobile's keyboard, and without thinking of the consequences, he sent the message.

**_< You left me in "seen..." I assume you are very busy, right? >_ **

He immediately regretted it, but it was too late, so he threw the cell phone on the bed, giving up, but when he almost immediately heard the beep of a received message, he sat up, looking for the device between the sheets. When he read Omar's answer, he felt the same as if he had been punched in the stomach, leaving him breathless.

_-¡Me cago en la puta!_ _With a friend?_ -He cursed out loud, helpless from being on the other side of the Atlantic. He had to do something soon, or he would lose Omar forever.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

Omar closed his eyes and let himself be carried away. It wasn't Ander, who was in his arms, but it felt good anyway, and at that moment, he needed that kiss as much as breathing, so he focused on the here and now. He slipped his tongue between Keith's lips, drinking from his mouth. He felt his entire body tremble, and what he wanted most was to be able to forget about Ander forever and start again… And maybe, just maybe, Keith could be that person to help him do it. He wanted him to bring him back to life; he wanted to stop feeling pain and be happy again. He wanted a second chance.

_-Hey... Omar, wait._ -Keith released his bottom lip and stepped back just enough to look him in the eye.

_-What's happening?_ -Omar mumbled, not understanding why Keith had broken the contact.

_-Don't get me wrong, because seriously, if it were up to me, I would kiss you all night long. But it seems to me that what you need right now is not fucking; what you need is a friend who listens to you._

He didn't believe what Keith had just said. - _What?_ -He managed to mumble without being able to hide his disbelief.

_-What I'm trying to tell you is that regardless of whether I like you, because that is evident, right?_ -He smiled to lighten the moment, and continued:

_-I also care about you, and if I didn't know what's happening to you, right now, we would be fucking without a doubt. But I know that you are fucked up and doing this won't help you, on the opposite, you'll feel worse tomorrow. So why don't you tell me what happened?_

While listening to him, he put a hand to his temple and began to massage it, thinking about Keith's words.

_-Jodeeer... ¿En serio tío?_ -He muttered skeptically. - _Right now, your sensible side had to come out, seriously? Are you sure you don't prefer to fuck?_ -He tried to joke, so as not to crumble in front of him. He walked back to the kitchen counter to grab his beer and handed the other one to Keith, who had followed him there.

_-Don't tempt me..._ -He joked, clinking his beer against Omar's.

_-So, are you sure you want to provide me your shoulder to cry on?_ -Even if he jokingly asked, deep down, he desperately needed to blow off steam on someone, and who better than Keith who didn't know Ander at all and who might be able to make a relatively fair judgment.

_-I'm all ears. Do we sit?_ -Keith pointed to the fluffy sofa, smiling at him.

When he finished telling his story with Ander, he felt lighter. Throughout the entire time he was speaking, Keith listened to him and occasionally nodded, encouraging him to continue.

_-Do you know what it pisses me off the most about all this? That although Ander says that things will be different, he always ends up acting the same ... As if he was sure that I would always be willing to forgive him._

_-And would you?_ -He asked with genuine interest.

He took a deep breath before answering. _–I think this time he has gone too far... and right now what I'd like is to be able to forget him._

Keith looked at him and nodded slightly. _-I know how you feel. Come, what you need is a hug._ -As Keith said it, he opened his arms so Omar could lean against his chest, just as he had done a few hours before.

They were both lying on the sofa, looking at the city through the window in complete silence. The scent of Keith's perfume was very discreet, but still, Omar could smell it and suddenly realized he was comfortable in Keith's arms. He could feel the heat radiating from his body, as well as the rhythmic beating of his heart, while Keith held him in his arms. Tiredness began to overcome him, but moments before falling asleep, he heard Keith whisper in his ear: _"I'm going to help you to forget him, Omar."_

*******


	13. My mind asks to forget

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, here's chapter 13!  
> I was listening to a song calls "Recuerdo" by Ricky Martin and Carla Morrison, and I got inspired by it.  
> I hope you enjoy it as I did.  
> As always, thanks for reading, commenting, or leaving a Kudo. It makes my day! 💜

**Chapter 13. My mind asks to forget**

**_(Ander)_ **

_Seven weeks later_

The last rays of sunlight trickled through the translucent windows, lighting Omar's torso, making his skin appear to take on a golden hue. He was barefoot and wearing only a light jogging pants; sitting on the warm wood floor of his apartment, he leaned his back against the wall, slightly closing his eyelids and frowning as if something bothered him. His hair was somewhat longer compared to the last time he'd seen him, falling messy across his forehead.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Because of the backlighting, Ander couldn't distinguish the different shades that Omar's eyes acquired. Still, it wasn't necessary to see him, to clearly remember as with the light, his eyes used to change from a brown tone to a fascinating hazel color. Omar was smoking silently and occasionally looked away from the window, only to drop the ashes into the glass ashtray beside him.

He slowly approached, barely aware of his own movements. He longed to touch him, to feel the warmth of Omar's skin again, just as he had done so many times in the past. When he reached him, he plopped down softly to his side without saying a word; their bodies barely brushed, but the electricity he felt was the irrefutable proof that chemistry had remained intact; at least on his part.

_-Hey..._ -He muttered, not daring to look him in the eye, unsure of his reaction. Instead, he turned his gaze to the towering skyscrapers that could be seen through the large window just in front of them, just as Omar was doing at the time.

For a few seconds, Omar didn't move. He stood impassive looking at the Brooklyn Bridge, which by then had started to turn on its hundreds of lights, making it look even more majestic than it already was. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw how, with some reluctance, Omar averted his gaze from the spectacular sight to rest on him, so he was forced to imitate him.

The first thing he noticed as soon as their eyes met, was the reaction of Omar's pupils dilating, and almost immediately gave him a genuine smile. The familiarity of that gesture was enough for a sudden feeling of happiness to take over him.

_-Hola, nene._ –Omar greeted him with that deep voice that he longed for so much, using the tenderness word that he used to address only for him.

_-I missed you so much, Omar... that for a moment when you left like that, I thought I had lost you forever._

_-Shhh... Don’t talk. Now you're here, and that's what matters, that we are together again._

Ander couldn't believe it. Omar had forgiven him, and not only that, but he was also saying that he still loved him. Carefully, as if it were a fragile object that could break at any moment, he took his face in his hands and gradually closed the space between them until he felt the softness of Omar's lips.

When Omar's tongue made its way between his lips, he couldn't help but let out a slight moan, remaining motionless for fear of breaking the contact. This was what he had wanted so badly what he needed to feel complete. With a sigh, he wrapped his arms around the nape of Omar's neck and stretched his neck to deepen the caress.

A few seconds later, he slipped a hand over Omar's bare chest and pushed him gently against the wooden floor. Before dropping the weight of his own body onto Omar's, he removed the shirt in a single movement so that he could feel the warmth of Omar's skin against his. With his lips, he looked for that place between the neck and the jaw that he knew Omar enjoyed the most, and began to trace a wet circle with his tongue, and then gently blow. Omar reacted with a hoarse moan burying his fingers in the softness of his budding curls.

With the knee, he pulled Omar's thighs apart and rubbed lightly against him so Omar could feel how hard he was. In a second movement, he slipped his hand inside Omar's sweatpants until he found what he was looking for. He wrapped his hand around Omar's cock and began to massage it slowly while rubbing the tip with his thumb, making it slide better thanks to the abundantly dripping precum. As he exerted more pressure, he could feel Omar's cock thicken, reacting to his touch.

His mind was on fire, and all he wanted was to taste him again. With both hands, he tugged on Omar's pants, taking him off the boxers too, to expose what he needed so much. He spread Omar's legs and began to trace a series of wet kisses on the inside of his thighs, feeling him tremble at his touch.

Slowly, he moved up to that sensitive spot behind his balls, and began to kiss and lick him in equal parts, pushing the tongue against his entrance while Omar allowed himself to be done. When he felt Omar's muscles become less tense, he brought the index finger to his mouth and sucked it. Then circled Omar's entrance and lubricated him with his saliva; in response, Omar hissed a _"Jodeeer!"_ at the same time that he opened his legs wider, giving him full access to do with him whatever he wanted.

Seeing his reaction, Ander felt him harden even more if that was possible, so without hesitation, he slid a finger inside Omar. He did it little by little, taking his time, with the tip of the finger caressing the soft folds until he went deeper into him, noticing the pressure of the muscle around his finger.

He began to turn it inside his body, moving it from one side to the other, making circles as he knew Omar liked; in response, Ander felt Omar shiver with pleasure as he moved his hips upward for more friction. A second finger joined the first one, pushing them together and then pulling them apart from each other to dilate him long enough. When he touched that sensitive spot he knew so well, he instantly got Omar's answer.

_-Jodeeer, nene... Don't stop!_ -It was a plea that made him shudder.

Ander's mind was in slow motion now, enjoying Omar's body. He couldn't think clearly; he was only aware of the pleasure he wanted to bring him. So without answering him with words, he slowly descended and began to caress him with his tongue from the balls to the tip, continuing to stimulate him with his fingers. He savored his salty taste before slipping it entirely into his mouth and beginning to suck on it while playing with his tongue and teeth, making him moan.

He looked up and smiled pleased to see Omar leaning against his elbows so as not to miss a detail of what he was doing to him. While Ander kept giving him pleasure, Omar kept his eyes on him; his pupils were dilated, and his lips parted, breathing hard.

He closed his eyes, focusing on the task, so Omar's touch on his shoulder took him by surprise. He looked up and sat up, gently pulling his fingers away. With his cheeks flushed and his lips parted, Omar was quite a sight to behold, so without hesitation, Ander approached him to catch his lips with his in a hungry and careless kiss. He licked Omar's mouth as if he wanted to make up for all the lost time with that kiss.

Immediately, he took off his clothes to be completely naked, and then he lay down on Omar. They both were kissing on the floor, not caring about anything other than enjoying the moment. Ander lifted Omar's arms to place them over his head and held both wrists with one hand. In response, Omar wrapped his legs around his hips, brushing one cock against the other, making them both moan.

_-Fuck me now..._ -Omar asked in a trembling voice, as he released his grip to slide a hand to Ander's cock and guide him to his entrance.

Ander was dying to sink into him, so he let out a kind of gasp when he felt Omar's body receive him unconditionally, while Ander went deeper and deeper until he was fully inside. He began to move slowly, but it wasn't enough, his body was asking for more. It had been too long since they had last been together, and Ander needed to feel wholly satiated by him, so he was increasing the pace and strength of his thrusts. His fingers dug into Omar's hips, leaving marks, as he felt how the sweat was running down his back.

Suddenly, time stopped, and nothing mattered more than the two of them and the feelings they were sharing. After so long, they became one again. Ander could feel Omar trembling under his body as he gasped out his name. The tug on his lower belly was the unmistakable sign that he wouldn't be able to last much longer, so he slowed down the pace but not the intensity, pushing deeper into him to stimulate that tender spot that would make them fly.

Ander knew Omar's reactions perfectly; the sounds he made, as well as the stiffness of his body when he was about to cum, but Ander wanted both of them to cum at the same time this time, for that reason, he gasped against his ear:

_-Omar... I... I won't last much longer..._

_-So cum for me, nene._ \- Omar whispered between gasps, and as if he had spoken the magic words, Omar began to moan louder since the orgasm had reached him, losing himself in Ander's arms.

Those words, along with Omar's face transformed by arousal, was enough for uncontrollable spasms to start invading him. As he was cuming, he shouted Omar's name, squeezing him with all his strength...

Suddenly, the darkness that reigned in the room was replaced by a too intense light, as if the morning had come suddenly, and the sun's rays pierced his eyelids. He closed his eyes for a second to protect himself from that glare, and so, without further ado, he woke up.

He had cum while he slept; he was lying upside down, holding a pillow in his arms. His heartbeat was pounding hard against his chest; he could feel his cock throbbing, still hard and wet against his boxers. Omar's image was still so vivid in his memory that he had to open his eyes to convince himself that Omar wasn't really by his side.

It had been such a real dream… A good one... He could still hear Omar's voice moaning very close to his neck, and if he closed his eyes, he was able to see him again. He gasped against the pillow and, unable to control himself, began to cry. First, warm tears rolled down his cheeks in the silence of his room, then it was an uncontrolled crying, sobbing, with spasms of pain and helplessness. Tears fell freely down his cheeks, and he couldn't, nor didn't want to contain them.

Not only his body and mind desperately asked for Omar while he was aware; at night, he looked for him when sleeping, and this time he had found him in his dreams.

He hated feeling like this. This whole situation with Omar was overwhelming him, making him feel so vulnerable that it scared him. At that moment, as desperate as he was, he wished with all his might that he would be able to forget him.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

He took a swig of his beer and almost choked with a laugh when he saw Keith's surprised face because of the smack he gave him for grabbing his popcorn bowl.

They were lying on the wide sofa, watching a chapter of _Black Mirror_ , drinking beer, and eating popcorn. Since the party, Keith was spending more time in his flat, and it had become customary for them to spend Sunday afternoons watching a movie or series on Netflix. It seemed that as time passed, their friendship was getting stronger.

With Keith, everything was so easy; they could spend hours talking about any topic without getting bored; he had a great sense of humor, so most of the time, they were laughing and playing pranks, and also, they both shared a passion for cinema. And unlike Ander, Keith had no difficulty expressing his emotions; on the contrary, he was extraordinarily frank and always said what he thought.

So when the night of the party Omar had told him about what had happened with Ander, Keith had listened to him to the end and had given him an objective point of view, making him understand some things that he hadn't considered before. It was also true that after that night, they hadn't made out again, even though they had had many chances to do so. And as incredible as it seemed, Omar was comfortable about it because while he had to admit that he liked Keith, he didn't feel ready to start a new relationship. It seemed that Keith understood perfectly, for which Omar was grateful thus.

_-Don't be an ass, Omar! Selfish..._ -He heard Keith complain, as he threw him a handful of popcorn in revenge.

Hearing him, Omar set the bowl aside and came at him, struggling and laughing, trying to forcefully subdue him. After a few minutes of struggling, both were breathing hard due to the effort, but Keith managed to pin him down by holding his hands above his head.

_-You lost, man, quit!_ -He was laughing as he straddled him.

From one second to the next, the atmosphere of joy they shared changed, giving way to something very different. The laughter stopped, and a complicit silence settled between them. Omar was the first to realize it, and before he could move, Keith approached him and giving him a quick kiss on the lips, released him, and stepped aside.

_-So, now that we've made clear who is in charge here, can we continue watching TV?_ -Keith asked, laughing, as he settled back into one of the corners of the sofa, not giving the slightest importance to what had just happened between them.

Omar didn't comment either, just smirked and grabbing the remote-control, rewound the last five minutes they had missed. When the chapter was over, Keith stretched out his arms and suppressed a yawn while he stood up.

_-I'm leaving; I'll see you in class tomorrow, Omar._

Omar nodded, accompanying him to the door. They said goodbye with a handshake and a pat on the back. Omar saw him enter the elevator and closed the door a few seconds later when he lost sight of him.

It was still early to go to sleep, so he returned to the sofa and lay down. He closed his eyes for a few seconds remembering Keith's kiss and smiled, shaking his head from side to side. He grabbed his mobile and opened Instagram. As he looked at the posts and stories his friends had uploaded, he remembered Ander. He hadn't seen any posts from him in a while, so curiously, he entered Ander's profile.

Ander had been publishing nothing for more than two months, but even so, he began to scroll down through his feed. It shouldn't have surprised him to realize that the photos of them together were still there, but he couldn't help himself. He had thought that Ander would erase them, or at least that he would hide them, but the fact of seeing them again made him feel somewhat melancholic. As he looked at each pic, he remembered with amazing accuracy all the details. How, when, and where they had been while posing for the camera.

_-Nooo! Jodeeer! You're an asshole…_ -He exclaimed out loud as he sat down quickly, trying in vain to do something about it.

A pic, in particular, had caught his attention for all the memories that came to him when he saw it. In it, he and Ander were both kissing, lying on the grass of what had been their school in the last year of high school, - _Las Encinas_ -, and Rebe had taken that pic without either of them realizing it. So when he mistakenly tapped into it, and the heart appeared, he knew he had screwed it up.

_“Jodeeer! Now Ander will get the notification, and he will know that I have been looking at his profile…”_ -Omar gave a sort of groan, and letting out a sigh, he fell back onto the sofa.

As a result of his talk with Keith, his relationship with Ander had improved in the past few weeks, and it was mainly because he no longer felt that rage as he recalled the decisions Ander had made. Now, to a certain extent, he could understand part of the problem, and that had allowed him to move on, and try to see him as a friend. It wasn't that simple, but it was what Ander had finally asked him to do, do not lose contact.

In recent weeks, in addition to the messages, they had talked on the phone a couple of times. But always because it was Ander who had called. Still, he was pleased to find that they were both capable of having an almost normal conversation as two friends who talked to catch up without silences or uncomfortable questions.

He thought about how different his life was without Ander, how his plans had changed about what he would do in the future, and how he missed him a little less each time. Now, he no longer felt the pressing need to return to Madrid, he could easily make his life in New York and settle permanently in this city.

In fact, if he was honest with himself, he had to admit that in the last two days, he hadn't thought about him again until he entered Instagram. And he knew that this new friendship that he was beginning to forge with Keith had a lot to do with it.

*******


	14. Seriously?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, chapter 14 is ready.  
> Thanks for reading and letting me know what you think about it!  
> xoxo 😙

**Chapter 14. Seriously?**

**_(Ander)_ **

_The same day_

It took about ten minutes for him to calm down; even after drying the last few tears, an occasional sigh was escaping from his throat without being able to contain it. It had been a long time since he cried as he had done that morning, and he didn't know if it had been liberating or if it had only contributed to his sinking further into his misery.

He looked at the clock. It was several minutes before six in the morning, which meant that it was more than an hour before the alarm clock started chirping. He got up and stripped off the boxers that were still wet and sticky against his skin, and then removed the sheets to toss them aside from the underwear lying on the floor.

He went to the bathroom and turned on the hot water tap. He didn't wait for the temperature to rise, so as soon as his body made contact with the cold water jet, he shivered, but didn't care. What he wanted was to erase the memories of that vivid dream he had had, and he hoped that a good shower could help him. Placing both hands against the wet tiles and leaning his forehead against them as well, he closed his eyes, letting the pressure with which the water fell massage his back.

He should have been longer than he had thought since the water was getting colder. _"What the fuck...? I've run out of hot water, and now I'll have to listen to my mom complaining about it… This day will be fuckin' great!”_ –He thought wryly.

He let out a sigh and opened the glass canopy, wrapping a clean towel around his waist and looked at himself in the mirror. Almost immediately, he averted his gaze from his reflection, because even the water hadn't been able to remove the swelling from his eyelids due to all the tears he had shed.

He got dressed with the first thing he found in the closet and sat on the bed. He squinted at the bulge on the floor of the sheets along with his underwear and cursed.

He picked it up and headed for the laundry room. He went down the steps and turned on the washing machine; under no circumstances would he let his mother realize the "accident" he had. He was no longer supposed to be a kid dealing with wet dreams, so it would be humiliating if she found out.

While he was waiting for the washing cycle to finish and then putting it to dry, his mobile started ringing. Annoyed, Ander pulled it out of his pants pocket and looked at the screen. It was a new notification from Instagram. As soon as he realized that Omar liked one of his posts, he felt the rapid pace of his heart. It seemed as if it was going to leap out of his chest.

He had to sit on one of the steps and breathe deeply. He opened the app with shaking hands and looked at the pic. It was a very old post, more than three years to be precise. Seeing the red heart with Omar's name at the bottom of the pic where they both appeared kissing, he felt a twinge in the stomach as if hundreds of butterflies fluttered inside him.

His head felt like it was going to explode, an avalanche of questions crowding in his mind _._ Had Omar been checking his profile? Why? Why had he liked that particular pic? What does it mean? What should he do?

_-Jodeeer!_ -He exclaimed louder than he would have liked, but he was feeling desperate.

He remained motionless, with the mobile in his hand looking out into the blue; he had many questions and no answers. At some point, as he racked his brains thinking about what to do, something familiar, fluorescent yellow, caught his attention.

He got up from the step and walked over to the back of the room. There were several shelves where his mother kept cleaning products, detergent, and other kinds of stuff. But there it was, in a dusty, forgotten corner. He reached out and touched it as if it wasn't enough just to see it. All this time, he'd had the solution in front of him and had not been able to view it. Now he knew what to do.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

_Two months later_

That particular day it had been almost impossible for him to concentrate for more than ten minutes in a row, and he knew exactly why. In the Audiovisual Production workshop, the teacher caught him making such basic mistakes that he earned a scolding in front of the entire class. But as much as he tried to stop thinking about it, his mind invariably led him back to the same dilemma.

He arrived at his apartment, put the backpack on the side of the door, and leaned against the couch. As he looked at the Brooklyn Bridge, he wistfully recalled the last walk he and Ander had taken on that same bridge nearly a year earlier. It was more than six in the afternoon, so in Madrid, it was after midnight, and that only meant one thing: Ander was turning twenty-two.

They had been celebrating their respective birthdays for five years; the first years they had done it together in Madrid, and the last two years, they had done it by video call, but their birthdays had never gone unnoticed. He was older than Ander by a year, but they were both born in July; Ander's birthday was first and a week later was his.

The problem, if he could call it that way, was that there had been more than two months since he knew anything from him. He remembered very well the last conversation they had had because he had asked about Azucena since he had an exceptional affection for her. They had also talked about college and their pals; generally speaking, everything had been relatively okay, but after that call, Ander hadn't contacted him again... and neither had he.

Even when a few days later he mistakenly liked that pic, he thought Ander would call or text him, but strangely none of that had happened. So here he was, watching the clock tick and wondering if he should call him now - as he'd had for the past two years that as soon as the clock struck twelve with one minute, Omar was the first to congratulate him - or he could just let it go and text him later.

In the end, Omar decided on the latter, so he turned on the TV to watch a movie and tried to forget about him. He woke up in the dawning with neck pain because he had fallen asleep in the wrong position, so he reluctantly got up and went to his bed.

He woke up a little later than usual, so he hurried up to get into the shower since he had a presentation first thing that morning, and he didn't want to be late. He stormed out of his apartment, made the usual stop at the corner coffee shop, and headed for the subway with a cappuccino in hand. He put on his AirPods and got into the subway car. As he listened to music, he thought about Ander and decided he would talk to him after classes.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

Although he had already made up his mind that Omar wouldn't call him as soon as the clock struck twelve as in previous years, he still had a pinch of hope of being wrong, so he stayed awake with the phone very close to him. But as time passed and the call didn't come, his mood gradually declined. Finally, at one in the morning, he decided to go to sleep; he turned off the light on the nightstand and muted the phone, trying not to think about Omar anymore.

After he received that _"like"_ on Instagram, he had thought that Omar would call him, but nothing was further from reality. Omar hadn't done so, and it was then when he decided not to be the one to call or send the message next, hoping that it would be Omar who would look for him for a change, but that had been two months, and since then they hadn't spoken again. It was clear that Omar was far from forgiving him, but despite this, he was still focused on the plan he had drawn to recover him.

His mother woke him up very early with his favorite breakfast, and they chatted for a long time before each one had to leave for their activities. Throughout the morning, he received several calls and congratulatory messages from his college friends and his former pals.

When Guzmán called him, he said that he had already organized a weekend outing with the others to celebrate him. He wasn't in the mood to celebrate, but he knew he couldn't convince Guzmán otherwise, so he reluctantly agreed.

In the afternoon, Ander met with his father as he had done every day for the past two months. Only this time they had met in a restaurant on the occasion of his birthday.

_-And how are things going? Do you already have an answer?_ –His father asked him at some point during the meal.

_-Not yet, but everything seems to be going well; either way, we still have three more months..._

Ander saw him nod, apparently satisfied with the news.

_-You've worked very hard these last two months... I'm sure you will achieve it. You know? I'm so proud of you, Ander._

Hearing his father speak to him like that, he felt excited but said no more. Ander just smiled at him feeling grateful that his father had agreed to help him.

When he arrived at his house, it was already around eight at night, and he had already lost all hope that Omar would call him. _"Maybe, Omar has forgotten your birthday, asshole..."_ \- He thought to himself with a certain hint of bitterness.

His mother came out of the kitchen to greet him, which caused him to put aside his musings.

_-Hello sweetie, dinner is almost ready, go upstairs to change your clothes, and I'll call you in a little while, okay?_

_-Okay, thanks, mom._ -He replied, forcing himself to smile as he approached her to kiss her on the cheek.

When he entered his room, he took off the blazer he was wearing and left it on the back of the chair, then dropped onto the bed with a sigh.

He closed his eyes for a moment and massaged his temple. He should be happy to be healthy at twenty-two; a month earlier, he had had his medical check-up, and the results confirmed that he was cancer-free, but today he was especially melancholic. While he was thinking about it, his mobile began to ring, he took it, and without seeing who was calling, he answered.

Omar's deep voice took him by surprise, so he sat on the bed with a broad smile without being able to avoid it.

*******

**_(Ander / Omar)_ **

****

Omar heard Ander's hoarse voice and couldn't help but shiver, but he quickly recovered himself and mumbled slightly lower:

_-Feliz cumpleaños, nene..._

_-Omar... Thanks._ _I thought you had forgotten._ –As soon as he finished the sentence, he regretted putting a hand to his forehead while grimacing.

_-How could I forget?_ -Omar asked as he adjusted the backpack on his shoulder to go to work.

_-Yes, well... uh... I... Thanks for calling._ –He stammered, feeling the clumsiest guy in the world.

_-Well, how was your day? Have you celebrated a lot?_

_-Mmm, sort of... you know. Guzmán has told me that we'll celebrate on the weekend with the others._

_-It sounds fun… Are you all going to the Barceló Theater?_

_-No, there's a new bar, you would have such fun it would blow your mind!_

_-I see... Well, when I travel to Madrid, I would love to go there._

_\- Oh yeah? Will you come?_ -He asked excitedly.

_-No... I mean I don't have it planned, but when I go I'd like to..._

_-I see... Now you're very busy, I guess, right? I've not heard much about you in these months..._ -He dared to tell him.

_-Yeah, well... you know, between work, college, and friends, I don't have much free time._

_-I see..._ -He mumbled, feeling a pinch of jealousy when he heard him mention his friends.

_-So, you don't have any plans to do anything tonight?_ –Omar insisted.

_-What?_ –He had to ask again since he lost the thread of the conversation while imagining him hanging out with other guys. Of course, he was no longer a priority in Omar's life...

_-I asked you if you don't plan on doing anything tonight..._

_-Oh, sorry, I got distracted for a moment. Yeah, but it's not a big thing, you know?_ –Ander lied.

Suddenly he didn't want Omar to know how pathetic his life was without him and that even on his birthday he didn't have an exciting plan. So out of nowhere, he said the first thing that came to his mind.

_-I'll go out for dinner..._

_-With Guzmán, Samu, and the others, I guess..._

_-No, I'll see them at the weekend. I'm going out with someone else... Eh... We're getting to know each other._

Hearing Ander, something inside Omar stirred. He had to stop and find a bench to sit on. Suddenly, those two months of silence made sense, and for some reason that he didn't want to overthink, Ander's words hurt him a lot. He knew that Ander was a hot guy and that he could go out with whoever he wanted, but he wasn't prepared for it to happen so soon and less after the way Ander had insisted for another chance. As he could, he tried to overcome the initial surprise and stuttered:

_-That's... that's great, dude._

Ander was silent for a few seconds thinking that maybe he had fucked up saying that lie, but even so, he forced himself to ask:

_-Thanks... And... What about you? Are you with someone?_ -He didn't want to hear the answer, but there was no going back. He felt a knot in the chest, and his hands began to sweat as he waited for Omar's response.

Omar was silent for a few seconds, pondering his response. The image of Keith appeared in his mind, as well as the type of relationship that both had. It was complicated, so he just answered:

_-No, I'm not with anyone. To be honest with you, I don't think I'm ready to start another relationship yet._

Ander almost laughed because of the happiness he felt upon hearing him but managed to contain himself, and for a moment, thought about telling him the truth.

_-Yeah, well, I... this is nothing serious, Omar..._

_-Tranqui, tío, you don't have to explain anything to me._ –Omar interrupted him. _–You and I are now friends, and I'm glad you are happy._

As he said it, he began to feel an emptiness in his chest, and at that moment, he realized that he had been wrong when he thought that he had already got over him. It had only been enough to know that Ander was dating someone, to make him realize that he still loved him. The pain in his chest was proof of that.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-You're right_. -Ander forced himself to respond.

_-Well, I've got to go. I'm glad I talked to you, nene._

Ander didn't want to hang up. He had so many things to say... but he decided that it was not the time, so, in the end, he managed to mumble:

_-Thanks for calling. And... Omar?_

_-Yes?_

_-Just... that... I also liked listening to you. I missed talking to you._

Omar grinned and mumbled before hanging up:

_-I also missed talking to you. Adiós, nene, have fun._

*******


	15. Becoming who we are

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After deleting and rewriting this chapter a few times, I was finally satisfied with the result. ;)  
> Thanks if you are still reading this story; I'm pleased to write about these two and be able to share it on this platform.  
> xoxo

**Chapter 15.** **Becoming who we are**

**_(Omar)_ **

_Four months later_

Even though autumn always came accompanied by some sort of melancholy, it was, by far, his favorite season of the year. One of the activities he enjoyed the most, was going for a walk and admired the trees’ amazing golden and red colors in more than a thousand different tones, and of course, watching their leaves fell off as the wind blew them away.

It was not long before school finished, and he could enjoy the winter break. It was amazing how time flew by, because it seemed as if it had been yesterday when college first started, and now, he only had one more year before being done with it. 

He was sitting on the ground at the edge of a small lake at Prospect Park, thinking about how much his life had changed within the last years. Even though he was far from home, he talked on the phone to his parents every weekend so he could get an update on Baba’s health and how things were going with their store. His dad had almost completely recovered from the ictus he had had and, since Marina was born, he seemed much more relaxed. Also, -even though it wasn’t as often-, he talked to Nadia, Guzmán, and his loved niece, who was getting prettier and more active as days passed.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

He looked at the clock and unwound. He had made plans with Keith, Jules, Matt, Jackson, and Kat so they could gather at his apartment and watch the documentary him and Keith had produced in order to drink some beers and enjoy the weekend; but that wasn’t until a few hours later, so he decided to stay a little longer enjoying that little “me-time.”

His relationship with Keith had recently gotten tighter after he opened up to him and told him about Ander. Since then, they had forged a peculiar kind of complicity, because they had become something similar to being ”friends with benefits,” but the thing was that neither of them had allowed romantic feelings to get in the way.

They saw each other almost every day because they had some classes together, and on weekends they usually hung out or partied with the rest of their friend group; without taking into account that some Sundays they watched movies together. But despite their great friendship and that, more than once they had ended up making out at some party, there was a sparkle missing; the kind that would make them want to start a former relationship.

During all that time, they had only fucked once, and Omar could perfectly recall when had it been. It was after Ander's birthday and right before his.

When he decided to have sex with Keith, a lot of it had to do with the fact that Ander had told him that he was seeing someone else, because... who was he trying to fool? It hurt to realize how easy it was for Ander to get over these situations. Some weeks later, Ander had cried for him, and before he could even blink, he had already found someone to comfort himself with.

So, when that night, the opportunity of fucking Keith had presented itself, he didn't think about it twice. Being motivated by something he didn't want to know more about, he wished with all his heart that Keith was the person with which he could have a stable relationship with. But when it all finished, he realized the chemistry between the two of them wasn't enough to make that possible.

His mind transported him to that memory and made him giggle as he remembered that conversation. 

_Keith breathed heavily, trying to get his breath back, and he had lit a cigarette as he made himself comfortable on top of some pillows. They were silent for some minutes as if both of them were making a mental evaluation of what had happened, until Keith turned to where he was._

_“It wasn’t bad, huh?”- Keith murmured, but the expression on his face said the opposite, so Omar exhaled the smoke and mocked._

_“Mmm, it could have been worse.”_

_“You’re an ass!!”_

_They looked into each other’s eyes, holding their gazes for a few seconds, and they both started laughing._

_“It is such a shame that we’re a mess in bed because if it weren’t for that, I’d be thinking about proposing right now.” -Keith said with a little giggle on his face._

_“Well, I would have happily accepted...”-Answered Omar, keeping up with the joke._

_“Being honest, Omar… I wouldn’t want things to change between us… Maybe this wasn’t what we expected but, apart from that, I have a blast when I’m with you…”_

_“I also have a great time when we’re together, and things don’t have to be any different between us from now on…it was just sex, we tried, and that’s it… we’re still friends, right?_

_Keith smiled and got close to him to kiss him on the lips briefly._

_“Well, that’s it then, I agree.”_

And that's how it had been. Their relationship didn't change at all; there were no weird or uncomfortable silences or stupid excuses to avoid each other; on the contrary, they continued to see each other and go out to parties as if nothing had happened between them. Even months later, in a meal at Jules' flat, where they both got drunk, they had kissed again, but nothing apart from that had happened then.

So, there he was, with his pathetic love life and no guy on sight for him to start a stable relationship with. He lay down, looking at the multicolor foliage the trees offered and his mind, invariably brought Ander's memory back, which made him growl.

_"Ander…"_ –Omar thought about him and shook his head. Lately, he didn't understand his behavior. Talking to him felt like riding a rollercoaster of emotions without having a seatbelt on. 

The day Omar turned 23 years old, Ander called him a few minutes after midnight. Ander seemed more than eager to let him know how much he missed him, and never during the entire conversation had he mentioned the guy he was dating, and of course, he hadn't asked either.

They talked for a while, and at some point, Omar had almost sworn that Ander was drunk because his voice sounded slightly off, and he began to say things that did not make much sense; among them, he had insisted that he had a surprise gift for him.

Weeks passed by, and the so-called "gift" never came, nor did he hear from him again for more than a month. He did not understand his mood and attitude swings, and to be honest, they had made him a little curious, but he avoided giving too much thought to the whole situation because he knew that would get him nowhere.

Letting out a sigh, he got up and brushed off the grass that had gotten stuck to his pants. It was time for him to make his way back to his apartment if he didn't want his friends to be there before him and make them wait for him.

Although he had arrived fifteen minutes earlier, Jules and Matt were already waiting for him, loaded with snacks and beers. He said hi to them, and they all went up to the apartment. A little while later, the others arrived, including Keith.

He was relaxed and happy to spend the afternoon with his friends; they played music, and while Jackson made some cocktails, the rest sat down to chat animatedly.

_-Are you ready to watch the documentary? -_ Asked Keith, without being able to hide his excitement.

Omar smiled as he listened to him. Both of them had worked really hard on that project, and it meant a lot to them since it talked about how LGBTIQ+ communities' rights had evolved throughout the years and the current situation worldwide.

_-What do you think if before watching it, we order something to eat?_ –Kat intervened, _-I'm starving!_

_-Yeah, would you like some pizza?_ \- Omar suggested, getting out his mobile so he could order them directly from the app. 

Everyone agreed that pizza was the way to go, so he placed the order, and then they all gathered in front of the TV in the living room to look at the documentary that he and Keith had created.

_-Your objective criticism will be really helpful because this project is worth half of our final grade... -_ While explaining its importance, Keith walked over to where Omar was sitting manipulating the remote control.

_-Where do you keep the ashtrays, Omar?_ -Kat yelled as she opened drawers looking for one.

_-They are in the second drawer from left to right!_ \- Keith replied.

_-Oh ... yes, I forgot that you spend more time here than in your own house._ -Kat scoffed, pulling out the ashtray from where Keith had told her.

Keith shrugged and let out a giggle while he showed her the middle finger.

_-Make room for me…_ -Keith asked, handing him a beer as he took a big sip of his. The sofa was very wide, so Omar spread his legs so that Keith could sit in between them. When Keith leaned against him, he wrapped an arm around his waist.

That kind of closeness between them was very common for all of their friends, so no one felt uncomfortable when they saw them hugging each other on the sofa, having Keith resting his head against his chest. Jules and Matt - who had been dating for several months - sat on the other corner and the rest of them on the next sofa.

Omar turned off the music and pressed play. The documentary was about to finish when the doorbell rang. Omar looked at the app and trying to get up, announced:

_-The food's here. I'm going to open the door..._

_-Don't get up, Omar, I'm very comfortable._ -Keith complained, not even making an effort to move.

Hearing him, Kat rolled her eyes and stood up, shaking her head. _–I'll go, but for the record, it is only because I am starving. Oh... and press pause, Omar, I don't want to miss the end!_

Keith blew her a kiss while raising his voice to make himself be heard: _-You are very sweet, did you know that?_

_-I know, babe!_ -Kat answered, laughing as she opened the door. She received the pizzas and took them to the coffee table.

_-Does anyone have five bucks for the tip?_ –She asked, looking at them.

_-Here..._ -Jackson stepped forward, taking them out from his wallet.

Kat winked at him and headed for the door again to tip the delivery man.

In the living room, the rest of them were talking about their impressions on what they had seen so far, clearly excited by the work he and Keith had done. Each had an opinion they wanted to share, so they all spoke at the same time, and it was difficult to understand what they were saying.

Omar was so caught up in the conversation, so he didn't realize Kat was taking too long.

_-Omar? It seems to me that there is someone here who wants to talk to you..._

Kat's voice tone and the way she spoke his name, made him turn his head towards her, as he released one of his arms from Keith's waist. The smile on his lips disappeared, and his heart started pounding when he saw Ander staring at him, standing on the threshold.

*******


	16. Nightmare

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Chapter 16 is ready!  
> xoxo

  
*******

Omar was so caught up in the conversation, so he didn't realize Kat was taking too long.

_-Omar? It seems to me that there is someone here who wants to talk to you..._

Kat's voice tone and the way she uttered his name, made him turn his head towards her, as he released one of his arms from Keith's waist. The smile on his lips disappeared, and his heart started pounding when he saw Ander staring at him, standing on the threshold.  
 _  
_

 ******* _  
_

**Chapter 16. Nightmare**

**  
  
_(Ander)_ **

_Three hours before_

The Boeing 787 landed just as expected at Terminal Seven at JFK Airport, around four in the afternoon. While he waited for the aircraft to stop completely, he looked absentmindedly through the window and giggled under his breath as he recalled the brief talk he had had with the employee of the airline that had attended him in Madrid.

She was really hot; she was a brunette, had green eyes and a great body, -to the point that even he was able to recognize it-, and it had seemed that she had thought the same about him because she was extremely friendly to him, hadn’t been shy at all and had flirted with him a lot, making him a little nervous. He found the whole ‘flirting’ thing very awkward because he never knew how to respond; he could only feel how his cheeks blushed every single time. 

_“Traveling on your own in a city like New York_?”- She had asked as she winked. 

_“Aha…”_

_“I’m sorry to say this, but being as cute as you are, you will surely find a way to have fun…”_

As he listened to her, he couldn’t help but smile, and killing all of her hopes, Ander came closer to the desk so that he could be as close to her as possible. 

_“I’m going to tell you a secret; I’m going to go look for my ex-boyfriend… I want to try to get him back.”_

The disappointment on her face as she listened to him talking was noticeable, and even more after how much she had flirted with him. Ander even had to bite his lips to not let out a burst of laughter. 

At the end of the process, and already totally resigned, she seemed moved by his confession because from the seat he originally had in row thirty-nine, he was assigned one in Premium Economy. 

_“Row 11… Ander Muñoz_ ,”- She uttered out loud, before handing over his passport along with his boarding pass. _“I hope you succeed; good luck.”_

As he listened to her, Ander had given her the best smile he could offer… he couldn’t believe he was that lucky. 

When the pilot announced they had arrived at New York, and the seatbelt signs were off, he put aside that funny anecdote and immediately got up to take out his backpack and line up to advance towards the exit. It's not that he was claustrophobic- but he almost was-, and he hated that once the aircraft had stopped, he had to wait for dozens of passengers from the front seats to get out. 

He cursed his luck, letting out a loud sigh, and rolling his eyes; he tried to remain calm when an old lady from the front seat, rose as calm as she could, blocking the aisle. Gathering all his patience, he softly smiled at her and helped her lower her belongings from the overhead compartment.

While he waited in silence for the old lady to stop talking with the passenger that was standing next to her and decided to move forward, he drummed with his fingers against the back of the seat. Finally, the woman began to walk, and he accelerated his pace to pass her in order to get to the migration desks. From his experience, he knew long lines awaited him, and he wanted to avoid them as much as possible.

Almost forty minutes later, and after a long list of questions from the migration officer, he finally sealed his passport and was able to collect his luggage. As soon as he left the airport, he noticed that the sun was setting, so he looked at the clock and shaking his head, saw that it was barely four-fifty in the afternoon.

That was one of the things he liked the least about autumn; days were too short and made him feel some type of melancholy. He put his luggage aside and lit up a cigarette, giving it a deep puff, then slowly exhaled the smoke, as if that might calm his nerves. As time went on, he became more and more restless; he could almost feel the adrenaline rushing through his body without doing anything to avoid it.

He felt how the cold wind hit his face and couldn’t help but shiver a little bit. He didn’t know for sure if he was shaking because of the weather- which would be exaggerated because in autumn the weather was much more benevolent - or was it due to the fact that he would see Omar again very soon. Either way, he adjusted the hood of his sweatshirt, took two more puffs on the cigar, and extinguished it against the metal ashtray next to him.

He got his cellphone out to type the hotel’s address in the Uber app and waited. He had only booked one night at the hotel that was less than a mile away from Omar’s flat, hoping that once Omar knew the reason he was there, he would let him stay with him for a few days.

A few minutes later, a Honda Accord stopped a few meters away from where he was standing. He double-checked the car registration on the app and came closer. A foreign-looking man in his fifties got out of the car to help him with his luggage, and in English with a strong accent, he said that he would take him to his hotel.

During the ride, the man who introduced himself as Yusnavi turned out to be a chatterbox, and that is how he found out that the man was originally from Cuba but had been living in the city for several years. When he heard that Ander was from Madrid, he immediately stopped speaking in English and started talking in Spanish, but he spoke so fast, Ander had to make a great effort to understand everything he was telling him.

After having such a fun time, Ander ended up listening to the story of why his parents had given him that unique name, and Ander had to hide a chuckle when he understood that Yusnavi came as a reference from the English word _“US Navy.”_ When they finally got to their destination, he said goodbye to Yusnavi by giving a good tip and thanked him mentally for having managed to distract him even for an hour.

Once Ander made the check-in, he went up to his room, and for a few minutes, he stood in front of the window, admiring the view. As minutes passed, he knew he was closer to see Omar, and just thinking about it made him feel something fluttering in his stomach. He took one last look and walked away from the window to open his suitcase; he took out some clean clothes that he left on the bed and carrying a small travel bag with him, went into the bathroom. He wanted to shower before doing anything else.

Thirty minutes later, he had already shaved, brushed his teeth, and put on some perfume as well. After changing his outfit several times, he opted for what he had initially chosen first. Blue jeans, a dark cotton t-shirt, a black blazer, and white sneakers. He looked at himself in the mirror and smirked. He knew it was silly, but he wanted to look good for Omar to like him; He wanted for Omar to see him and still think he was attractive. Before leaving the room, he put the cellphone in his pocket and reached for a scarf.

When he left the hotel, it was completely dark outside, and the temperature had dropped noticeably. He buttoned up his blazer and, wrapping his scarf around his neck, began to walk at a slow pace. On the way, he looked a few times toward the Brooklyn Bridge, wondering if the padlock that he and Omar had put in several years ago would still be there.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

There had almost been a year, and a half had passed since the last time he and Omar had been there to check it out, and although that time they had been lucky, today it was unlikely that they had not already removed it. Still, he wanted to think he'd find it hooked as steady as the first day. So, he made a mental note to stop around one of those days and check it out. Hopefully, Omar would agree to go with him.

Less than fifteen minutes later, he stopped in front of Omar's building. He hoped that because it was Saturday afternoon, he could be able to find him in his apartment since he had not called him before coming because he wanted to surprise him. During all these months, he had contained himself not to talk to him about his plans, so what difference did it make to wait a little longer and tell him personally?

He breathed in deeply and headed towards the entrance. The front door was semi-open, so he entered and walked towards the elevator. When the gates opened on the tenth floor, he walked down the hall to his door but stopped two meters away when he saw a blonde girl talking to who appeared to be a pizza delivery boy.

All of a sudden, Ander began to doubt if he had made the right choice by deciding not to call him sooner. As he thought about what to do, the delivery guy passed beside him, and then he noticed that she was watching him curiously. He had no choice but to approach and clearing his throat he said in perfect English that he was looking for Omar.

_-Omar?_ -She asked, somewhat surprised, while she analyzed him with a pair of intense blue eyes. _-Wait a minute._

The blonde opened the door widely, because until that moment she had kept it half-closed, and she turned inside shouting:

_-Omar? It seems to me that there's someone here that wants to talk to you…_

That was when he saw him. For a split second, everything around him disappeared, but the image placed in front of him. On the same couch, where he and Omar had made love long ago, Omar was sitting with his back to the door with a guy in his lap hugging him around the waist, while the guy leaned his head against his chest, and for several seconds, as he watched the scene, he felt his lungs run out of air.

When Omar turned around, and their eyes met, what he saw in his expression confirmed that he was not wrong. Omar's eyes reflected a mixture of alarm and bewilderment. Apparently, the one that was most surprised about his arrival hadn't been Omar but himself. Never during all the times, they talked on the phone did Omar even suggest that he was dating someone. In fact, he remembered that on his birthday, he had asked him, and Omar had told him that he wasn't ready to start a relationship with anyone else.

Everything that happened afterward was so fast that he didn't even have time to react. It was that or the fact that he was in shock and couldn't think clearly. The only thing happening on the loop on his mind was that someone else was already in Omar's life.

_-Ander?_ –Omar almost shouted.

Ander saw him exchange some words with the guy sitting on his lap, who looked at him as if he knew exactly who he was. After that, Omar stood up and came close to him.

_-Ander? What are you doing here? Is everything alright?_

Omar said one question after the other, still looking at him and not believing he was standing right in front of him.

_-Hey, I'm sorry for not letting you know I was coming…_ -He managed to answer.

Omar shook his head and asked again.

_-When did you get here?_

He cleared his throat and put his hands on his jeans' pockets. He could feel how they were cold and sweaty, and his mouth dry. He tried as hard as he could to show himself calm before answering.

_-A few hours ago… Hey, I can tell it's not the right time for me to be here. Look, I'm staying at the Tillary Hotel, the one on Flatbush Avenue, it's quite close. I would like to talk to you. Maybe we could meet tomorrow... if you're not too busy._

Ander could see how Omar looked back at the living room for a moment or had he looked at the guy he was with? Ander wasn't sure but, after a few seconds, Omar looked at him again.

_-Yes, sure. We could have breakfast together…_

The blonde girl to whom he had talked before came close to them and turning to Omar, suggested: 

_-Omar, why don't you invite your friend in and that way you can introduce him to us?_

As he listened to her, Ander took a step back. The last thing he wanted was to meet his friends, or to be honest, Omar's boyfriend. What he wanted was to get out of there and take refuge in the solitude of his room. But before he could refuse, Omar nodded.

_-Of course... I'm sorry, I was just surprised to see you here, come in..._

_-Thank you, but I really don't think it's a good idea..._

_-Hey..._ -the blonde girl intervened, _-We don't bite, huh!_

_-Of course..._ -he managed to murmur. _-Okay, just for a moment._

_-It seems good to me, well I'm Kat, by the way..._

_-Ander_ -he replied with a slight nod.

_-Well then, Ander... Don't be shy_. -She smiled at him, winking and then turning around and heading to where the rest of his friends were.

Omar looked at him briefly and made a move with his hand for him to come in. As he walked into the living room, he quickly scanned everything around him. The place was just as before, except perhaps for the huge plant near the window. Several pairs of eyes looked at him curiously, and when he looked at the guy who was sitting with Omar moments before, he noticed that he was looking at him suspiciously.

_-Hey, guys... This is Ander, he... he is... a friend of mine from Madrid._

_"A friend..."_ –Thought Ander, raising his eyebrows helplessly, feeling worse and worse.

_-Ander, these are my friends from college... Matt and Jules, Jackson, Kat, and Keith..._

_-Nice to meet you guys_... -He mumbled, not moving from where he was.

_-So… you're Ander…_ -Hearing him, he turned to Keith and, finally, had a chance to get a better look at him. He had dark brown curly hair; just like his and intense blue eyes, which looked at him with no intention of being friends. As well as a pair of ear and eyebrow piercings and tattooed arms.

_-Keith ... Don't..._ -The way Omar addressed him made him clench his jaw but didn't say anything else.

A brunette, big guy, who Ander remembered Omar saying was called Jackson, broke the awkwardness moment by offering him a drink.

_-I make the best cocktails, Ander. Come try one!_ –And making a sign for him to follow him, he headed towards the kitchen isle.

He didn't really feel like drinking, but it was better than standing in front of that guy, who apparently knew who he was, even though Ander didn't have the slightest idea of his existence. He looked at Omar and noticed that he was tense, but he was trying not to show it, so when he heard Jackson calling him again, he looked away from Omar and went after him.

When he and Jackson returned to the living room with a drink in hand, he noticed that Omar had moved and was now sitting on the wooden bench at the opposite end from where this Keith was.

_-We were watching a documentary that Omar and Keith produced... It's fascinating._ -Jules pointed out.

As soon as the girl pointed that out, the others started talking about it. They looked excited discussing their arguments about it, and since he had no idea what they were talking about, he just nodded and sipped his drink while listening to them.

Kat approached Omar, who was a couple of meters from where he was sitting, and heard her ask if she could borrow a sweatshirt.

_-Please, honey? It's just that I forgot mine and I'm getting cold..._

_-Of course, let me bring one to you, sweetie._ -Omar smiled at her, getting up and running his hand through her hair in a loving way.

At that moment, Matt addressed him, asking what his opinion was about the rights of the LGBTIQ+ community, which made the others remain silent, waiting for his response. Ander had been caught off guard, so he tried to think of his answer when he saw Keith get up from where he was and follow Omar to his room.

He answered the first thing that came to his mind as he slightly looked at Omar's room. He had a huge desire to get up and go after them, but he knew that it wouldn't be the smartest move to make, so he stopped himself from doing it.

Ten minutes later, neither of them had returned, and he was already on the edge of hysteria. He drank the rest of his drink in one gulp and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.

_-Why is Omar taking so long? I'm gonna freeze!_ -Kat exclaimed, rubbing her thighs with the palms of her hands. _-I'm going to look for him..._ -she mumbled, making a move to get up.

_-Oh! Don't go! You're going to interrupt them! You know what those two are like…_ -Jules scoffed. _–Surely now they will be making out or something similar…_

Hearing her, Ander felt sick. He had to get out of there as soon as possible. He couldn't stand staying there one more minute, feeling like a fool listening to that bullshit, and imagining Omar in that guy's arms. Everything was turning out so different from what he had imagined… It was as if he was living a nightmare that he couldn't wake up from.

*******


	17. Are you fucking kidding me?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Chapter 17 is ready...  
> I hope you like it.  
> I appreciate you taking the time to read it and give me feedback about it.  
> xoxo

*******

Ten minutes later, neither of them had returned, and he was already on the edge of hysteria. He drank the rest of his drink in one gulp and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.

_-Why is Omar taking so long? I'm gonna freeze!_ -Kat exclaimed, rubbing her thighs with the palms of her hands. _-I'm going to look for him..._ -she mumbled, making a move to get up.

_-Oh! Don't go! You're going to interrupt them! You know what those two are like…_ -Jules scoffed. _–Surely now they will be making out or something similar…_

Hearing her, Ander felt sick. He had to get out of there as soon as possible. He couldn't stand staying there one more minute, feeling like a fool listening to that bullshit, and imagining Omar in that guy's arms. Everything was turning out so different from what he had imagined… It was as if he was living a nightmare that he couldn't wake up from.

*******

**Chapter 17.** **Are you fucking kidding me?**

**_(Omar)_ **

_-Are you okay?_

A few seconds later, he heard him ask again.

_-Omar? Hey! Are you okay?_

Keith stood in front of him, with a worried expression on his face. Omar took a deep breath and let it out, grabbing -without noticing- the edge of the bed on which he was sitting. He was still in shock.

_-Yeah…_ -He managed to murmur. – _Just give me a moment._

His head was in chaos from the bewilderment. He still couldn’t believe Ander was on the other side of that room. To say that he had surprised him was just a little part of what he had felt. He had almost shat his pants when he saw him standing on the doorstep. _“What the fuck was happening? Why didn’t he say he was coming?”_

He needed to talk to him alone and ask him all of those questions, but he couldn’t query his friends to leave like that. He didn’t know what Ander’s intention to show up like that was, out of nowhere. If at least one of the times they had spoken on the phone he had mentioned he was planning on traveling to New York, it would make a little bit more sense...

Keith’s words made him raise his head and put aside all the questions he had.

_-Omar, we need to get back; I imagine that, because of your reaction, you didn’t see any of this coming, but you need to calm down because you look really disturbed. Plus, if we don’t hurry, I’m sure Kat will come any second now, and she will know that something’s happening. I mean, unless you don’t mind..._

_-No, I don’t want them to know. Let’s go..._ -He stood up from the bed and picked the first hoodie he found, but before going out, he turned to where he was. _-Keith, I really need to talk to him..._

_-Do you want me to I can make up something so we all go, and you can be alone and talk? But don’t you think it would be too obvious?_ -He questioned him racing his left brow

_-Jodeeer!_ \- He said without knowing what to do.

_-Look, try to calm down, and in a while, I’ll look for an excuse to get us all out of here; that way, you can talk to him alone, okay?_

When he listened to him, Omar nodded.

_-Oh, and Omar? I just want to let you know that I’m not gonna let that asshole hurt you again._

_-Keith, calm down…_ -He said. _-I appreciate your concern, but I can assure you I’m not gonna let that happen again._

_-If you say so… -Keith hissed._

When they got out of the room, Omar handed the hoodie to Kat, who received it with a great smile, but he looked around and couldn’t see Ander anywhere, so he assumed he was using the bathroom.

_-Oh, by the way, your friend left. He said he was tired because of the whole trip, but he said he’d call you in the morning._ -She said as a way of explanation, raising her shoulders.

_-Alright, thanks, Kat. -_ He mumbled, trying to hide his disappointment.

The next two hours passed in slow motion for him. Even though he tried to immerse himself in the conversation, his mind betrayed him over and over again portraying Ander’s image looking at him from the doorstep, but at some point, he looked at Keith, and him, winking, made a sign for Omar to sit by his side.

Omar got up, walked towards him, and plopped down by his side. Immediately, Keith put an arm around his neck and dragged him to his chest as he was still chatting. Jackson started making jokes, and everybody started laughing, but even though he tried so hard to enjoy as the rest of his friends did, it was simply impossible to do it. He felt how Keith kept dragging him closer to him to kiss on the temple and faking a yawn, announced that he was exhausted and wanted to leave.

Omar thanked him with a grin since his plan was working, and everyone else had already stood up and started picking up bottles, cups, and leftovers from dinner before saying goodbye.

_-I really hope that when we see each other on Monday, you’ll feel better. Anyway, if you need anything, call me, no matter what time it is, okay?_

Omar nodded, feeling grateful for having him in his life.

_-I love you, asshole..._ -Keith barked with a giggle before closing the door behind him.

When he was on his own, he picked up the cellphone and called Ander, but immediately entered the voicemail. He tried to do it for a second time, but the outcome was the same.

_-Jodeeer Ander! -_ He hissed, running a hand through his hair.

Omar thought about all the options he had and decided that if he waited until tomorrow for Ander to call him, he wouldn’t be able to sleep. It was then when he googled the fastest route to the Tillary Hotel, and once he memorized it, he got out of his apartment. Just as Ander had mentioned, the hotel was very close, and because of the speed at which he was walking, 10 minutes later, he was already entering the spacious lobby.

If Ander had turned off his cellphone, it was clear that he had no intention of speaking to him. And knowing him, he was sure that after seeing him hugging Keith, by now, he would’ve probably already made an entire movie about them on his head. Technically, he didn’t need to give him any explanations about his love life because they were just friends, but he couldn’t get off of his head Ander’s expression when he saw them together.

In the lobby, there was only one girl who seemed a bit stressed, and all of a sudden, an idea crossed his mind. Determined, Omar walked over where she was, and when he was close enough, he looked askance at the metal pin that was attached to her blouse. His smile widened when he saw that the word "trainee" could be read under her name. Putting on his "nice boy" face, he greeted her as if they had seen each other before.

_-Hey, Megan, how are you? I have a problem; I left my key inside my room. I was wondering if you could please help me get another one._

The girl smiled, and for a moment she seemed confused, but before she could ask him something else Omar said:

_-I really can't remember my room number; it's just that I have a very loose memory, but my name's Ander Muñoz, I just arrived earlier today._

_-One moment, please, Mr. Muñoz._

She looked at her computer and started typing, while Omar begged for any other employee not to come and catch him lying because he would get into serious trouble. Less than two minutes later, she handed him a card with a big smile and wished him good night.

Without looking back, he pressed the elevators button, and as soon as the doors opened, he got in. He read the room number on the envelope and pressed number nine. Once it started to go up, he was able to breathe again.

When he got to room 915, he saw a "do not disturb" sign hanging from the doorknob, but ignoring it, he took a deep breath and knocked on the door. While he waited, he looked at his watch and saw that it was after ten at night, so it would be improbable that Ander wouldn't be in his room so late at night considering besides, the six hours of the time difference. 

A minute later, he was still standing there, so he decided to insert the card key into the slot, and when the green light began to go on and off, he pushed to open the door.

_-Ander?_

All the lights were off except for the TV; also, the volume was so low that it was barely audible. Ander had fallen asleep facedown with his head to the side, and the remote control was on his hand. He only had underwear on, and the rest of his clothes were scattered on the floor.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

He didn’t know what to do. He could wake him up, but he would surely scare the shit out of him. He knew the best thing to do was to leave and let him sleep so he could call him in the morning. But instead of turning around and getting out of the room, he came closer to the bed and, being careful not to wake him up, lay beside him.

For several minutes, he just looked at him as if it were a guilty pleasure. His hair had grown, making his curls show again. The same curls that drove him crazy... and yes… He looked more fucking gorgeous if that was possible.

He knew that it wasn’t necessary to look at him to remember perfectly how his features looked like, but for some reason, he couldn’t get his eyes off of him. It was as if Ander had a magnet inside him that would always attract him.

_“Joder, Ander! Why did you come here?”_ -He cursed mentally, as his gaze placed itself on his sensual full lips, inevitably reminding him of the power of that mouth had on him even after so long.

After everything they had gone through, Omar thought he was over him, but seeing Ander again made him realize that was far from being true. He knew Ander had met someone else, and they were supposed to be just friends now, but what he didn’t get was the reason for showing up to his apartment like that.

He stifled a yawn and looked at his watch. He had to leave before it was too late. He had been lying by his side for more than an hour now, and it didn’t seem like Ander was going to wake up soon, but he was so comfortable laying on that fluffy mattress that he decided to stay for just five more minutes.

*******

**_(Omar / Ander)_ **

_-Jodeeer! What the fuck is going on?!_ –Ander shouted, truly horrified, as he was looking for something to defend himself with.

Omar didn’t know what was that woke him up first, the horrifying scream that almost burst his eardrums or the hit in the back that followed, making him fall to the floor.

_-¡Auch…! ¡Jodeeer!_

When he opened his eyes, the bedroom was still relatively dark, but he could see Ander kneeling on the bed, looking to where he was lying. 

_-Omar…?? Is that you?_

_-Aha… -_ He managed to murmur as he massaged his butt.

_-Jodeeer! You scared the shit out of me, dumbass! How did you get in?_

Ander felt as if his heart could leap out of his chest at any moment, and not precisely because of excitement. A few minutes earlier, the feeling of a weight on his back woke him up. When he half-opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was someone lying next to him with an arm over him, and his first instinct was to scream and push him off the bed.

When Omar finally got up, he put a hand to his face and rubbed his eyelids, and, with the other one, he rubbed the back of his neck too. When he fell, he hit himself with the edge of the nightstand, and now he felt an intense pain in that area.

_-I called you twice, and since you didn’t pick up the phone, I decided to come looking for you and well… I said I was you in the lobby, so a very kind girl gave me a key._

As he explained how he had gotten into his room, he saw Ander observing him incredulously.

_-Jodeeer! This Hotel’s security rocks! I mean, if you were a serial killer, I’d be dead by now._

Omar shrugged, and all of a sudden, started laughing without being able to contain himself. After the initial shock, the whole situation was just comical.

That spontaneous laughter made something inside Ander stir. He felt some kind of hope as if that laugh could warm up his entire heart, trying to think about the possibility of things between them getting better. If he analyzed the situation carefully, it was a good sign for Omar to be with him, instead of being on his flat with…

He didn’t want to think of Omar fucking that guy, so he put aside that thought and allowed himself to smile. What really mattered was talking to Omar and explaining why he had traveled to New York. Everything else… well, he would just face that later.

The way he saw it, he had two options. Be sad and give up on Omar after seeing him with that guy, or keep his plan going and try harder to get him back. He didn’t have to think about it much to decide and take the second choice, so trying to get rid of the elephant in the room, he joked as he turned the nightstand’s light on. 

_-Well, then what? It’s been six months since the last time we saw each other. Are you gonna give me a hug or what…?_

When he saw Ander's expression, he couldn't do anything else but get closer and hug him. It felt really good to hold him in his arms again, so he allowed himself to enjoy that proximity. He closed his eyes and deeply inhaled his scent, and almost instantly, he felt how his body reacted to him, so clearing his throat, he took two steps back. When they looked at each other again, he could see that same excitement reflected in Ander's eyes, so wanting to break the silence, he asked as he sat on the edge of the bed:

_-So, are you gonna tell me why didn't you say you were coming, asshole?_

Before answering, Ander picked up the shirt that he had taken off hours before and, after putting it on, sat next to him.

_-I guess I was just trying to surprise you…_

Omar made some kind of growl as he remembered how it felt seeing him again.

_-Well, you certainly did tío…_

Hearing Omar, he remembered the surprise and pain he felt when he saw him hugging that guy. He was eager to ask him about it, but now was not the time to do it; he would undoubtedly find a way to talk about that.

Omar's question made him focus on the conversation again. 

_-How long are you gonna be here?_

_-Well, to be honest, I don't know. I haven't bought my ticket yet, but I don't think it'll be more than a week._

_-I see..._ – He murmured, still not being able to understand why he had come.

_"Why doesn't he have a return ticket, and why is he staying in a hotel that is definitely expensive for a student to pay…?"_ -He thought of that after Ander turned on the lights and he could see how fancy the room was. He had so many questions…

_-Well, unless you just won the lottery and now, you’re a posh guy, and I know nothing about it… I don’t know where you’re gonna get the money from to pay for a week in this hotel tío._

Ander twisted his mouth a little bit when he heard him say that. -No... I haven’t won the lottery, nor do I plan to stay here. Tomorrow I will look for a much cheaper place to stay.

Omar looked at him and nodded. At least that question was solved. He remembered when his father kicked him out, and Ander had told him to stay in his house without hesitation... of course, they were dating back then, but still...

_-No, tío. You can stay at my place… It’s big enough, and it has a guest’s room._

Ander opened his eyes even wider because he was obviously surprised. When he planned this trip, he hoped to be able to stay with Omar, but that had been before seeing him with that other guy.

_-Really, Omar?_

_-Of course, you let me live at your place for many months. I don’t see why I wouldn’t offer you to stay at mine the days you’ll stay here._

_-Okay. I really appreciate it, Omar._

After they both stayed silent for a few seconds, he decided it was time to explain what was going on.

_-Look, I know I fucked it up, and even after that, you agreed to be friends… but months ago, after you left, I… bottomed out._

_-What do you mean?_ -Omar looked at him, clearly worried.

Ander shook his head and continued talking.

_-I’m not gonna tell you the details because I don’t want you to get bored, but one morning I went down to the laundry room, and as I thought about the course I wanted my life to take, I saw my tennis suitcase, it was all dusty and old, in one corner and in that moment I knew what I had to do. I started playing tennis once again…_

The more he listened to him, the less he understood about the whole situation. _“What did he mean by saying he had bottomed out? What did that have to do with playing tennis?”_

_-But… you hate playing tennis. Why would you do it again?_

_-I hated that my dad made me do it… I hated that it had become a requirement in my life; being the best player, being forced to win tournaments, and all that… But at the very beginning, when I used to do it because I did it for fun, I really enjoyed it, you know? Maybe I had never told you this before._

_-No, you had never told me about it._

_-The thing is that I don’t know why I didn’t see it before, Omar… Maybe none of this would be happening... and you and I would still be together._

_-Ander…_ \- Omar interrupted him. _-What are you talking about? I’m really not following this conversation… What does playing tennis have to do with us?_

_-You never saw me play, but I’m a fucking crack, you know?_ \- Ander kept talking as if he had just ignored his question.

_-The thing is that I asked my father to train me again and since then I haven’t stopped. Not even a single day. At the same time, I talked to my mother because I knew she had contacts for being the headmistress of Las Encinas, and I asked her to help me look for an athletic scholarship to come study to New York. Do you get it now?_

Now, Omar knew what he was talking about and didn’t know what to say. He still wanted to make sure he understood what Ander had just told him.

_-Are you saying you got an athletic scholarship to finish college here?_

Ander smiled as he nodded.

_-My parents could never have paid for college here, so I noticed that the only way to do it was through tennis._

_-You have to be kidding me..._ – Omar couldn’t believe his eyes. He was listening to him, but he just couldn’t believe it.

_-Last week I finally got the letter in which, after validating my college credits, they finally accepted me as a “Transfer Student,” and that is why I have to be at NYU on Monday; to present the TOEFL... As soon as I pass, I can do the paperwork to enter in January and see which subjects will not be validated..._

_-What did you just say?_ –He almost shouted when he knew Ander would also study in the same university as he did.

_-Well, that, Omar… And I don’t exactly know how many days that process is gonna take, that’s why I haven’t bought my plane ticket to return to Madrid to make the final arrangements and then return here definitely after Christmas._

Omar looked at him as if he was seeing an alien, so Ander didn’t know what was going through Omar’s head, so he was forced to confront him.

_-Well? Aren’t you gonna say anything?_

*******


	18. Close Enough

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 18 is finally ready!  
> I was struggling a lot to finish it... so I hope you enjoy it...  
> xoxo 😅

*******

_-Last week I finally got the letter in which, after validating my college credits, they finally accepted me as a “Transfer Student,” and that is why I have to be at NYU on Monday; to present the TOEFL... As soon as I pass, I can do the paperwork to enter in January and see which subjects will not be validated..._

_-What did you just say?_ –He almost shouted when he knew Ander would also study in the same university as he did.

_-Well, that, Omar… And I don’t exactly know how many days that process is gonna take, that’s why I haven’t bought my plane ticket to return to Madrid to make the final arrangements and then return here definitely after Christmas._

Omar looked at him as if he was seeing an alien, so Ander didn’t know what was going through Omar’s head, so he was forced to confront him.

_-Well? Aren’t you gonna say anything?_

*******

**Chapter 18. Close Enough**

**_(Omar / Ander)_ **

_“Ander will come and live in New York.”-_ He repeated that phrase over and over.

_-Omar?_ –Ander insisted, as he took the remote control and turned off the TV.

_-Eh…?_ -He whispered, looking him in the eye. _-Pfff… I don’t know what to say to you, Ander. It’s been one surprise after another._

_-I see…._ –He answered without being able to hide how disappointed he was.

_-Of all the times we talked … Why didn’t you ever tell me?_

_-Because I wasn’t sure, I was gonna get the scholarship… In fact, nobody knows but my parents… and now you._

And all of a sudden, Omar remembered.

_-And what about the guy you’re dating? Are you gonna leave everything behind to come to live here?_

_“Of course, he had forgotten. What would Omar think if he knew he had made it all up?”_

_-It was nothing…_ -He finally murmured _. –I’m not seeing anyone right now._ –He emphasized, without taking his eyes off of his.

Omar raised his eyebrows without believing him a hundred percent, but he didn’t say anything else.

_–Omar, listen…I know that not because I’m gonna live here, you’ll receive me with open arms. I know what I did…_

Omar listened to him but didn’t know what to think; his mind was still a whirlwind of emotions.

_-I don't know… I guess it's a lot to swallow... By the way, what time is it?_ –He asked just to not talk about that anymore.

_-It's almost three am._ –Ander mumbled, taking a quick look at his watch.

_-Really?_ –Omar exclaimed in disbelief. He didn't think he had slept that long.

_-I think I should go. Is it okay if we meet again at noon? So, you can have enough time to do the check-out, and afterward, we can take your luggage to my flat._ -He proposed as he stood up.

_-It's gonna dawn in a few hours… why don't you stay? Tomorrow we can have breakfast together and catch up._

Omar looked askance at the bed, and then he looked at Ander again. He felt so vulnerable with everything that was going, and he wasn't sure he could trust his intuition. 

_-I don't think this is a good Idea, Ander._

_-What's wrong? I mean, it wouldn't be the first time…_ -He made that risky comment, referring to the fact that less than an hour ago, Omar had woken up next to him.

_-Yeah, but we were together before._ –Omar answered, ignoring the mocking look on his face.

_-Omar, I'm just saying you can sleep here because it's very late. Not something else. Look, if you want me to, I can even sleep on the couch._

Omar looked at the small couch to which Ander had referred to and then to the king-size bed. He knew he needed to reject Ander’s proposal and that it was better for him to go home and assimilate everything that was about to change in their lives. However, the words that came out of his mouth were the complete opposite of what he had thought.

_-Okay, it’s just a few hours anyway… It’s not that big of a deal. And don’t be silly, tío, there’s no need for you to sleep on the couch, the bed is big enough for both of us._

_-Vale…_ -Ander agreed, trying to sound as chill as he could, but on the inside, he wanted to jump and shout because of that little achievement. He knew he needed to be more careful and patient because he didn’t want Omar to feel any kind of pressure, but he couldn’t let the opportunity of sleeping next to him just pass.

Omar looked directly at Ander when he took off his shirt to put it on the back of the chair, to just have his boxers on. Seeing him like that, with a naked torso, made him remember a lot of memories. As he daydreamed, he saw him walk around the bed and jump to land on the other side, letting him lay down on the place he used to sleep on when they were together.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_“Jodeeer… Control yourself”_ – He chided himself for keeping reminiscing about the past. He turned his back on him and quickly undressed to get in bed, lying as far away from Ander as possible.

Seeing Omar lay almost on the edge of the mattress and cover himself up to the neck, he had to bite his lips to not laugh out loud. He was going to make a comment about it, but he thought about it and decided not to give his luck a try.

_-Good night, Omar…_ -He whispered before turning the light off and letting the room be completely dark.

_-Good night, Ander…_ \- He forced himself to mutter, as he felt the mad beating of his heart hitting his ears.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

****

Ten minutes later, he still couldn't fall asleep, and the fact that he could hear Anders irregular breathing next to him was a sign that he was still awake too, and that didn't help at all. There was a reason they had been together for so long; they had dated, they had been lovers, they had been confidants, and sometimes, they had only been friends.

He knew him better than he knew himself, and even though Ander had told him that he didn't expect things to change between them, he knew he was lying, if it was true, he wouldn't have left everything behind to try and get that scholarship. The real question was if he was able to let the past go, and with it, all the pain it brought, and try to go back to what they had before.

If anyone had said to him that he would end up sleeping next to Ander that same night, he wouldn't have believed it… And there they were, stupidly close… sharing the same bed less than a meter far from each other, but yet so far away when it came to what they felt. Ander's voice broke the silence.

_\- You still awake…_

He could pretend to be asleep and not answer, but it would be useless. Apparently, Ander knew him very well too. Besides, because of the way he had said it, it was an affirmation rather than a question.

_-Aha…_ -He whispered.

_-Aren't you even a little happy to see me?_

That question took him off guard. He took a deep breath and slowly let it out.

_-I'd be lying if I said that I'm not. It's just that I had the idea that… well… it doesn't matter now._

Almost a minute had passed before Ander spoke again, and when he did, it was almost as if he wasn't sure to say it aloud.

_-Omar… I… I know I don't have the right to ask you this, but... that guy… are you with him?_

He didn't answer immediately. He could lie to him and tell him that they were dating and that he was so excited to be with him. Maybe that way, Ander wouldn't accept the scholarship and go back to Madrid, but… did he really want him to do that? He couldn't deny that, after the initial shock, he was astonished when he knew about everything he had done to come to live here.

Plus, it was evident that the attraction between them was intact. Omar could feel it in the way Ander looked at him; in the way he had hugged him… And if he was being honest to himself, what he wanted most was to get lost on those lips, and the hardness he started feeling in between his legs was proof of that. He made himself put those thoughts apart and decided to tell the truth.

_-Keith helped me when…well…when you and I broke up. But no… we're not together, but I'm not gonna lie to you. He has become a significant person in my life._

It was so long before Ander said anything that for a moment, he thought he wouldn't say a word, so he was surprised to hear him speak in an almost inaudible tone:

_-Have you two fucked?_

_“Jodeeer! Why was he making things so hard? What was he supposed to answer?”_

_-Why are you asking me this, tío? Have I asked you about what you've done with your private life for the past few months?_

_-You're right… I'm sorry. Just tell me something then, just a simple yes or no. Is there a slight possibility for us to get back together? If you say no, I'll understand and I'll decline the scholarship, but if you still feel anything for me… I swear I'll do anything to get you back, Omar._

He knew what it had meant to Ander to open up that way, but he just didn't feel capable of giving him an honest answer. As he carefully chose his words, he felt how Ander softly touched the back of his hand with his fingers. It was such a soft and quick touch that, for a moment, he thought it hadn't been intentional, but a few seconds later, Ander put his hand next to his so he could intertwine his fingers with his.

_-Don't say anything if you're not sure right now. Just think about it for a few days and tell me before I go so, I know if I should come back in December or not._

_-Vale…_ -He heard himself say as he slightly pressed his hand against Ander's before letting it go. - _Let's get some sleep now._

He turned to the side and now he had more doubts than ever. After listening to Ander's proposal, he had a hard time falling asleep. 

*******

****

**_(Ander)_ **

****

He could blame the time difference for his lack of sleep, but the real reason was completely different. The pain on his chest was proof of that. Omar didn't need to answer, so he knew that he was fucking that guy, and even worse, to see that he had feelings for him. It wasn't the same thing to picture it than to actually hear it from him. It was a strange mixture of deep sadness and possession… plus, jealousy had taken over him.

For that same reason, he had played his last card, asking him to think about his response. He wanted to use those days to let Omar and himself know that they still had a chance. He didn't know how much time he spent thinking about what had happened hours before, but little by little, sunlight started to show, and the room dimmed, making him able to see Omar's silhouette.

Omar was still keeping his back on him, and among the silence in the room, he focused on listening to his steady breathing. He had moved a couple of times as he slept, and now, they were closer to each other. They were so close he could even feel the heat Omar's body irradiated, so he closed his eyes and breathed in that familiar scent. He got a little closer and dared to brush his lips against one of his shoulders, in an almost imperceptible caress, but that was enough for that long-held desire to awaken in him.

He started feeling a familiar tingling on the lower part of his abs, and without being able to avoid it he reacted to that proximity getting as hard as a rock. All of a sudden, Omar made a lazy movement, snuggling against him. Ander could feel Omar's ass against his dick, and that was more than he could bear. He knew Omar was still sleeping, but he could wake up at any moment, and he had no idea how he would react.

By that time, he was already breathing heavily, and every second was much more sensitive, so he decided that, maybe, the best thing would be to go to the shower and jerk off. Still, the moment he was going to get up, Omar emitted a slight growl as he rubbed himself against him.

_-Jodeeer!_ –He moaned, letting out a sigh.

He instantly felt how Omar's body got tense, and almost immediately, he turned, and they were face to face now. Ander observed him, and first, he saw confusion and then another expression, which was indecipherable to him.

_-What the fuck…?_ –He babbled, being incapable of finishing the phrase.

_–I swear it was not intentional, Omar. You started moving against me… and... You better than anybody knows the effect you have on me._

After pronouncing those words, Ander looked for the slightest sign that he wanted the same as him in Omar's gaze. He turned all of his attention to his mouth and saw Omar bite his lower lip… At that moment, he knew exactly what he would do next.

*******


	19. Hard for me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> The truth is nothing that I'd planned initially, happened here. I don't know how but the plot has given an unexpected twist. I guess the following chapters will be a little bit more fun and less dramatic... at least a couple of them... or not? Honestly, I don't know, hehe. Though I'm not sure about how long it'll keep being like this... I hope you like it, and of course, I'd love to read your thoughts.  
> As always, I don't need to say how excited I am when I read your reviews and kudos! I can't tell you how much I look forward to it every week. ;)

*******

He instantly felt how Omar's body got tense, and almost immediately, he turned, and they were face to face now. Ander observed him, and first, he saw confusion and then another expression, which was indecipherable to him.

_-What the fuck…?_ –He babbled, being incapable of finishing the phrase.

_–I swear it was not intentional, Omar. You started moving against me… and... You better than anybody knows the effect you have on me._

After pronouncing those words, Ander looked for the slightest sign that he wanted the same as him in Omar's gaze. He turned all of his attention to his mouth and saw Omar bite his lower lip… At that moment, he knew exactly what he would do next.

*******

**Capítulo 19. Hard for me**

**_(Omar)_ **

_A few minutes earlier_

Just like a déjà vu, a warm, well-known sensation ran through his body, making him smile. As an instinct, he got closer to that warmth that was providing a type of pleasure he hadn't experienced in a long time. Still half asleep, he emitted kind of a moan as he felt how little by little he started getting hard in response.

A very familiar voice whispering a curse made him fully wake up. As he opened his eyes, his body immediately tensed as he realized where he was and who he was with. At that moment, he was aware that Ander practically had him cradled in his arms and that he was responsible for the pleasant feeling he was feeling right now.

_"Oh, I have to be fucking kidding! I've been rubbing my ass against Ander's dick, jodeeer!" -_ He cursed mentally, knowing beforehand that the confrontation would be inevitable.

_-What the fuck…?_ -He murmured, trying to seem confused as he turned around to face him. Ander looked fucking horny; his lips were halfway open, and his cheeks were slightly flushed as he observed him with that unmistakable expression Omar knew so well.

He wasn't able to finish the phrase because a shudder ran down his spine when he heard him confess the effect he still had on him in a harsh voice. So, in a weak try to stop his impulse to kiss him, he bit his lower lip, not knowing that gesture would be interpreted as a clear invitation by Ander.

**_(Ander)_ **

Before he could freak out, he lay forward to close the space between them and caught Omar's lips between his as he held his nape with one hand. As he felt Omar didn't pull back, he deepened the kiss pushing his tongue to breakthrough, which made Omar slightly gasp against his mouth.

That unexpected response awoke an almost a primitive desire inside him, causing a low, desperate sound to escape from his throat as well. He had wanted that moment to happen for so long, that now that he was experiencing it, it was almost unbearable. 

The warmth of Omar's tongue playing with his was the trigger that lit up the fire inside him that, for so long, had remained off. He held his breath when Omar bit his upper lip slowly, and every fiber on his body shouted for him to not stop. He softly lay on top of him, pressing his body to the bed, enjoying that contact, delighting in the softness of Omar's skin against his as he mumbled Omar's name against his mouth.

A few seconds later, he slid his tongue through Omar's chin to go down his neck so, after he could give him a couple of wet kisses along his collarbone. That was too much, and his body responded to those stimuli the only way it knew how…making his dick get harder, if even that was possible, as a response to that unsatisfied need. When he felt Omar's hardness against his leg, it was as if a sweet melody sounded on his head, as he knew Omar wanted it as much as he did.

It wasn't the persistent phone ringing that ruined the magic of the moment, but Omar's reaction of slightly pushing him away to incorporate and extend his arm to pick up the cellphone from the nightstand. Ander watched him make an effort to regulate his breathing, and after clearing his throat, he heard him say:

_"Keith… What's up, man?"_

As soon as Ander heard that moron's name, he let himself fall back into the pillow, expelling the air from his lungs. He glanced at him, and when he saw Omar sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to him, putting his hands to his face as a sign of frustration. 

_"I'm fine…ah…mmm…no… I can't talk right now, but what do you think if I call you later, and we have lunch together?"_

_"Aha…okay...yeah… me too."_

_"You too what?"_ –Ander would have wanted to ask him, as jealousy took over him, but he was only able to give him a furious look even though he knew Omar couldn't see him.

When Omar hang up the phone, he didn't immediately move. On the contrary, he kept sitting with his back to him, and from the angle where Ander looked at him he could see his tense shoulders and part of his clenched jaw.

_-Omar?_ –He hissed in a shallow tone, waiting for him to turn around.

Finally, after what felt like an eternity, Omar stood up and looked at him. Even though his gaze was a lot brighter, Ander noticed Omar slightly frowning as he clenched his fists tightly on each side of his body, his jaw tensed. He knew him so well that he could read those signs, among many others, that would maybe go unnoticed for someone else, but not for him, so he shouldn't have been surprised by what Omar told him next.

_-I think I should leave. I wanna shower and prep the room you'll stay in. You can come by later…_

As Omar talked, he didn't look at him directly, he started getting dressed as if he couldn't stand being in the same room as him for one more minute. When he saw him walk to the door, Ander jumped to his feet and followed him, blocking his way.

_-Omar... Don't leave like this, please. We need to talk._ –He mumbled, bringing both hands to the lapels of Omar's jacket and pulling him up to try to kiss him.

Although Omar didn't openly reject him, neither did he reciprocate the kiss. The passion that had consumed them moments before was far away gone. Omar froze as if waiting for him to surrender, so sad, Ander let go of him.

_-There’s nothing to talk about, Ander. This shouldn’t have happened... It was a mistake._ –He declared, being very clear.

_-But Omar, just listen…_

_-No. I’m not letting you break my heart again._

That statement, along with the bitterness on his voice, left him speechless. He swallowed hard as guilt hit him again. Sadly, he knew that Omar was right to feel that way, and even though he wanted to tell him that he would never hurt him again, he knew that if he tried to do it right now, it would only make things worse, so he kept quiet.

_-You already know the address…I will see you in a while._ –He heard him mumble as he left.

He let himself drop on the bed with his legs hanging from the mattress, struggling with a mixture of confusion and impotence. _“What the fuck just happened?”_ It was undeniable that Omar still felt something for him because he had acknowledged it by the way he had kissed him. He had to figure out if there was something else… Was it only the physical attraction that had always existed between them? Or was there the possibility of him still loving him?

In his mind, he remembered Omar’s conversation with that asshole. Although Omar told him that they weren’t together, Ander wasn’t stupid and had noticed that from the way he had spoken to him, there was more between them than just sex. That discovery made him feel an unpleasant tug on his stomach.

He let out a sigh and decided to focus on the brief but intense kisses they had just shared. He closed his eyes, brought his hand to his lips, and with his index and middle finger, started to gently rub his lips, remembering those caresses, making him smile. After all, he didn’t have to wait for Omar’s response, because even without wanting to, Omar had already responded in the best way possible.

All of a sudden, a breeze of hope invaded him as he realized that he had plenty of time to fix things between them because it was a fact that he would finish college in New York. And on the other hand, no matter what was happening between that guy and Omar, he would make sure to let Omar know he was willing to get him back at all costs. With that thought in mind, he began to pack his suitcase feeling lighter, and the broad grin that settled on his face lasted there the rest of his day.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

When Omar got to his flat, he headed directly to the bathroom and began to undress. All the way back to his apartment, he out himself on automatic mode, since his mind had betrayed him, recalling over and over again the feeling of longing that came over him when he felt Ander's hands running over his body. The fierceness of his kisses claiming his mouth was enough so that just remembering it, he was getting hard again, wetting his boxers.

He urgently needed to shower, to see if water was able to make the burning sensation on his skin disappear because of Ander's caresses. He turned on the hot water tap and stepped into the shower, letting the pressured waterfall on his shoulders. He closed his eyes for several seconds, and again the images from that morning hit him, making him curse as he shook his head.

_"Jodeeer! I'm an asshole… How can I be so weak when it comes to Ander?"_

Leaning a hand against the wet tiles, he let out a ragged sigh as he remembered Ander kissing him. He lowered his head and touched his cock to start jerking off, and as he did so, he began to fantasize about the image of Ander fucking him gently and deeply. He raised his tongue to his lips and arched his back as sweet spasms seized him, causing him to involuntarily gasp as he cum under the water.

Almost two hours later, he was sitting in front of the kitchen isle with an American coffee in hand, nervously biting his nails. After he got out of the shower, he had dressed up in blue jeans, a black crew-neck sweater, and white sneakers. He had put on some perfume and then gone to the room where Ander would be staying to fix it up a bit and put on fresh sheets on the bed.

He glanced at the clock in the kitchen, and then checked his phone one more time. Nothing. Not a message, not a voice note, not a single missed call. _“Could it be that after the way I left, Ander has decided not to stay with me after all?”_

_-Jodeeer!_ – He muttered, slapping his hand against the kitchen counter. _"Now, what am I supposed to do? Call him, wait for him, or just accept that he won't come?"_

Maybe the last one would be the best option. Ander hadn't even been in town for twenty-four hours and had already turned his life upside down. He gave his coffee a sip and got up to dump the rest in the sink. Either way, if Ander was willing to accept his offer, he should talk to him and make things clear between them. The only thing he could offer him was his friendship, not something else. As he had told him, he was not gonna let him break his heart again.

He was about to plop down on the couch when the doorbell rang. As if it were a conditioned response, much like Pavlov's theory, his heart rate raised, causing his heart to start pounding and felt a strong fluttering sensation in his stomach, invading him. He cleared his throat before answering, and Ander's deep voice on the other end of the line confirmed that he was wrong to think he wouldn't show up.

_-I'm here…_

_-Okay, I'll see you up here._ –He managed to answer, pressing the button so he could enter, as he tried to look calm.

He opened the door and listened to the unmistakable sound of the elevator coming up. _"Okay… it will only be a few days, and once you let him know that what happened earlier cannot happen again, everything will be fine." -_ He told himself as he waited for the elevator doors to open.

A moment later, Ander appeared, dragging a suitcase with one hand and with a cardboard container on the other one, which by the way, seemed to have two coffees in it. As he walked down the hallway to get to him, Omar took the opportunity to look at him carefully. Did Ander look… relaxed? Omar could even say he looked… happy.

_-Here…This one's for you, chai latte, your favorite as far as I remember. I bought it at the corner coffee shop, so the temperature is perfect. -_ He explained, handing the cup over to him.

As he listened, Omar couldn't do anything to hide the surprise on his face, so he raised both of his bushy eyebrows as he took the cup, feeling some kind of skepticism.

_-Thanks, come in._

_-What is it? Don't tell me you don't like it anymore …_

_-No, It's not that. It's just that I wasn't expecting it._

_-Well... It's just a kind gesture; it's not a big deal._ -Ander replied as he raised his shoulders and curved his mouth in a subtle smile, licking his bottom lip as a habit that he had deeply ingrained -remembered Omar-, looking away immediately.

_-Where can I leave my stuff?_ –He asked so relaxedly, as he gave a sip to his drink.

_-Ah… yeah, come on, follow me._ – He told him as he entered the guests' room.

Ander was behaving in a very different way from what he thought he would do after what had happened between them, so for a moment, he felt weird, but he tried to go back to normal before he could talk again.

_-Ander? Hey, what happened earlier today... I wanted to tell you that_... -He started mumbling when both of them came back to the kitchen, but Ander interrupted him.

_-It's not gonna happen again, Omar. You have my word._

_-I see…_ \- He muttered, somewhat incredulous.

_-I'm not gonna kiss you again... unless you ask me to._

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-Wooooow!!! What are you trying to say, tío? You've got to be kidding me!_

_-Well, that I'm gonna respect your choice and I'm only gonna kiss you until you ask me to do it…_

_-Pfff… You're losing your mind if you think I…_

_-Come on, just leave it now._ –He interrupted him, letting out a giggle. _–If you're so sure about it, then you have nothing to worry about... and I'll have to be okay with the fact that we're just going to be friends then..._

_"That was best for both of them ... and he was sure about it ... or wasn't he?"_

Ander's voice got him out of his thoughts.

_-Have you had breakfast already?_

_-Eh…What? No, not yet._

_-I was thinking we could have breakfast at the place we went on your birthday, do you remember? That place was really cool…_

_-Yeah sure, let's go._

Ander smiled at him and turning his back on him, he started walking towards the exit with that confidence and arrogance that characterized him. As Omar observed him, he was sure that the days he would spend with him would be more complicated than he thought they would be.

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone! I just want to share that I'll be updating every Monday because a couple of weeks ago, I got back to work, and I don't have the time I'd like to. So, I appreciate your patience, and I'll try to make it worth it. :))


	20. Mal

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! Chapter 20 is here ahead of schedule. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it.  
> As always, thanks for the kudos and/or comments or just for reading!  
> xoxo

*******

_-Ander? Hey, what happened earlier today... I wanted to tell you that_... -He started mumbling when both of them came back to the kitchen, but Ander interrupted him.

_-It's not gonna happen again, Omar. You have my word._

_-I see…_ \- He muttered, somewhat incredulous.

_-I'm not gonna kiss you again... unless you ask me to._

_-Wooooow!!! What are you trying to say, tío? You've got to be kidding me!_

_-Well, that I'm gonna respect your choice and I'm only gonna kiss you until you ask me to do it…_

_-Pfff… You're losing your mind if you think I…_

_-Come on, just leave it now._ –He interrupted him, letting out a giggle. _–If you're so sure about it, then you have nothing to worry about... and I'll have to be okay with the fact that we're just going to be friends then..._

_"That was best for both of them ... and he was sure about it ... or wasn't he?"_

Ander's voice got him out of his thoughts.

_-Have you had breakfast already?_

_-Eh…What? No, not yet._

_-I was thinking we could have breakfast at the place we went on your birthday, do you remember? That place was really cool…_

_-Yeah sure, let's go._

Ander smiled at him and turning his back on him, he started walking towards the exit with that confidence and arrogance that characterized him. As Omar observed him, he was sure that the days he would spend with him would be more complicated than he thought they would be.

*******

**Chapter 20. Mal**

**_(Omar)_ **

The attitude Ander had shown after what had happened in the morning had made him lose his mind, to say the least. When they got out of his flat, they had to take the subway to get to the restaurant Ander had suggested, because it was on Park Drive North, right in the heart of Central Park. When they were on their way, Ander talked most of the time, as he barely listened to him because mentally, he was fighting an internal battle trying to figure him out.

For as long as he had lived in the city, he hadn't gone back to The Loeb Boathouse because of the memories the place brought back to him. When they sat down in one of the tables that were near the lake, he tried to repress the feeling of melancholy that invaded him, as he remembered all the promises both of them had made each other in that same place long before, so much, that it seemed as if it had happened in a past life.

Now, he knew that any promise for as solid as it might seem could survive the distance and the inexorable passage of time. He was sure that when they both made plans to make their relationship work, they had done so, thinking that they might be able to overcome any adversity. Still, nothing had been further from reality, since, paradoxically, in this very place had been the beginning of the end of their relationship.

Ander's Cheerful voice brought him back to reality, and even though he tried to follow up on the conversation, he was unable to do it.

_-Ah… yeah…_ -He nodded as he tried to smile.

_\- 'Yeah,' what?_ – Ander asked him, raising an eyebrow, so he could mock him afterward. _-You don't have the slightest idea of what I asked you, do you?_

_-I'm sorry... I got distracted for a minute. What did you say?_

_-I asked you to tell me a little bit more about NYU... it's just that thinking about it ... makes me feel excited about finishing college here._

He knew that what he would answer would be like a punch in the stomach but, seeing him so happy and confident, as he was feeling like shit, he couldn't help himself but answer:

_-I thought you said it wasn't a fact that you were staying... I thought you said you would wait for me to give you an answer, what happened to that?_

As soon as he finished that phrase, he saw discomfort on Ander's face, but before he could reply, Omar shrugged and continued speaking as if nothing had happened.

_-I guess you will like it… I mean, in case you decide to stay. The university's prestige is well known and will help you open a lot of doors to enter the labor world. And well, there is a lot of kind of people and knowing you... I know you won't have trouble making friends quickly._

_-I see... I thought I already had a friend here._

Omar ignored his joke and picked up the menu, trying to change the subject.

_-Do you know what you're going to order?_

Ander let out of sight and imitated him by directing his attention to the dishes on the menu.

_-Coffee and a croissant._ –He said as he put the menu on the table. _-What about you?_

_-I haven't decided yet ... it's just that I'm not really hungry._

Lastly, he ordered the same thing, and when they finished having breakfast, the Hispanic waitress that attended them gave them the check accompanied by a broad smile, inviting them to come back soon.

_"I don't think so…"_ –thought Omar, but instead, he thanked her and smiled back at her.

_-Hey, would you like to explore the lake on one of those boats? I think it would be fun…_ \- said Ander, pointing with his head towards the set of gondolas that were on the shore.

_-Pfff…What are you saying? You need to stop Ander… I don't know what you're up to, but I don't have the slightest intention of having a romantic lake adventure as if we were a couple that was in love. Plus, I have other things to do, and I need to go back now._

He knew he was pouring all of his frustration on Ander, but he couldn't avoid it. And the fact that he had told him on such a confident tone, that he wouldn't kiss him unless he asked him to, just made him feel angrier minute by minute. Obviously, without taking into account that charming attitude, which made his temper get worse and worse. If Ander thought that just because of his adorable smile, he would let all of the past behind so he could fall into his arms, he was really out of his mind.

_-Okay... I just wanted us to have a good time, but I see you're not in a great mood._ -He answered as he stood up, leaving a couple of bills on the table.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Omar didn't say anything; he just grabbed his wallet and gave the amount that corresponded to half the bill. He knew he was being an asshole, but he just couldn't help it. A little voice inside of his head was screaming at him that he needed to show Ander that he didn't know him as well as he thought.

First, Ander looked at the bill Omar handed him, and afterward, he looked at him in the eye. He let out a kind of snort before taking it, and without saying anything else, he put it away and started walking without waiting to see if he would follow him. Deep down, Omar was aware that this attitude was extremely childish, but he wanted to provoke him at all costs, and apparently, he had succeeded.

When they got to his apartment again, they had barely talked to each other on the way back, and deep down, he was already regretting having spoiled breakfast. He needed to control his impulses and be smarter, as he couldn't let his emotional ups and downs to control him.

_-Ander, listen…_

_-Omar,_ -Ander interrupted him- _Are you sure you want me to stay here? Because if you've changed your mind, I can really stay somewhere else._

_-No._ –He immediately answered. _-I'm sorry for the way I behaved earlier, I was an asshole. It's just that… forget it. It won't happen again. You can stay here for as long as you need it._

_-Are you sure?_

_-Come on, I mean it._

_-Okay then…_ –He mumbled, slightly curving his lips.

_-I'm going out, but here's a copy of the key so you can come and go as you pleased._ –He explained, leaving a key on the kitchen island. _–I'll see you later._ –He said goodbye, getting out of the apartment without waiting for an answer.

*******

_-How are you? What happened, did you talk to him?_ –Keith asked, sitting in front of him, and as he took a sip from his beer. 

_-Pfff…what can I tell you? I think I need something stronger._ –He answered as he glanced to look for the waiter.

When the waiter got closer, Omar put aside his beer. _– Whiskey on the rocks, please._

The boy nodded, and he looked at Keith, asking if he wanted the same drink. 

_-Oh no... It's too early for me. I'm okay with the beer._ – The waiter let out a burst of friendly laughter and got back to the bar.

_-Long story short, he told me he got a sports scholarship to come study at NYU_. -He finished the sentence and let out a sigh as he massaged his temple.

_-Are you kidding me? Is he gonna come to live here? And what does he think is gonna happen? Is he planning for you to forgive him and get back with him?_

Omar looked at Keith, which couldn't hide his discomfort as he heard the news. So he just shrugged and added: 

_-And... He's staying in my flat…_

_-So... Are you an ass or what's wrong with you?_ -He said as he looked at him without believing a word. _-Have you forgotten about everything he's done to you, Omar?_

_-No, Keith, I haven't forgotten. You have to believe me when I say I'm very aware of everything he's done to me, but he's just gonna stay here for a few days as he arranges his paperwork for college, and I couldn't be an asshole and let him pay for a hotel room when he let me stay in his home for so many months._

_-You're right... I had forgotten about your high sense of responsibility._ -He mocked. _-Do you really feel the need to be so nice after the way he behaved with you? You're screwing up, you know that, right? The only thing you're gonna get out of this is for him to think that he can do whatever he wants to you and that you're always going to forgive him._

_-You need to chill. It's not like that. Look, man, I appreciate you worrying about me, but I know how to handle this. We're just friends, and if I offered for him to stay at my flat it's just to help him out... And right now, what I need is a friend and not somebody to judge me…_

Keith was looking at him with an expression of utter disgust, so for a moment, the idea that he was jealous crossed his mind, but he quickly dismissed it.

_-Come on, you should order a whiskey and drink with me… don't let me drink on my own._ –He asked, smiling.

_–Okay, just one, it's Sunday, and I don't want to wake up tomorrow feeling like shit because of the hangover._ -He defended himself, but when Omar drank the rest of his drink on one gulp, he rolled his eyes and shook his head in disapproval.

_-So…?_ – He questioned him but shut up when he saw the waiter approached the table again.

Once they were alone again, he continued, annoyed: _-So while that moron is in your flat, we won't see each other? And what's gonna happen to our movie nights?_

_-Ander. His name is Ander, and don't be like that, because it almost looks like you're jealous, man._

As he listened to him, Keith leaned back to lean on the back of the stool, raising both hands to his head.

- _What are you talking about, Omar? Of course not, asshole!_

_-Come on then... You better change the look on your face then... Plus, of course, we'll keep seeing each other. There's no need for things to change._

_-If you say so…_

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

When the movie was over, he let out a long yawn and rubbed his eyelids so that he could look at the clock. It was past 10:00 p.m., and Omar hadn't gotten back yet, so he picked up his cell phone being unsure if he should text him or not.

The truth was that he hadn't paid much attention to the movie because he had been continually asking himself what Omar would be doing. Ander was lying on the living room's sofa, and all of a sudden, the image of Omar hugging that guy popped up, on his head. Clearly annoyed, he tried to think of something else without being successful, and the possibility of them ending up in bed just made him sick to his stomach.

The sound of the door slamming open along with Omar's unmistakable laughter made him jump to his feet. He took a couple of steps forward but stopped abruptly when he saw him so drunk he could barely stand; Keith was by his side holding him by the waist and apparently trying to convince him to enter the apartment.

_-Jodeeer!_ –Ander hissed so low; he was sure neither of them had heard him. He approached them to address Omar.

_-Omar… Come on; let's go to your room so you can rest a little bit._

Hearing him, Omar looked up, trying to focus, while babbling nonsense words. And seconds later, he started laughing.

_-So why did you let him drink so much?_ – He berated Keith directly, who gave him a harsh look in response.

_-Look, dumbass… I don't need to give you any kind of explanation, and I don't think it's any of your business either._ – And turning to Omar, he said: -Let's go to your room, Omar.

Ander wanted to beat the hell out of him, but he contained himself because he knew that would only make things worse. So, he stayed silent and followed both of them to Omar's bedroom. Omar let himself drop on the bed, being completely unaware of what was happening.

_-I think it's better for you to leave._ –Ander said as he looked directly into Keith's eyes.

_-Oh, really? Well, I don't think so. I'm staying with him… How does that sound to you?_ – He replied, giving him a mocking look, as he took a seat next to him.

_-No… Keith_ – Omar babbled before Ander could reply. _-You don't need to stay, man… I'm fine._

_-Well, you've heard him. Omar doesn't want you here._

For a few seconds, Keith looked at him in a challenging way, but finally gave up whatever he was going to say and left the room. Ander glanced at Omar and left too.

Keith was already waiting for him in the living room, and when he saw him, he walked towards him and stopped when he was a few inches away from his face. They were so close to one another that Ander could smell the alcohol on his breath, and his nose almost brushed his, but even that didn't make him take a step back. On the contrary, he held his gaze, and since they were practically the same height, he didn't have to lift his face to look him in the eye.

_-Look, man, I don't know what you're trying to do by showing up on Omar's life like this, but I'm gonna make myself clear. I'm not going to let you hurt him again. Omar doesn't need you._

_-Oh, you think?_ – He replied with a funny expression on his face. _-And who are you to decide what Omar needs or not? As long as he doesn't ask me to disappear from his life, I'll be here._

_-Asshole! We'll see…_ \- After threatening him, Keith stepped forward, slapping him with his shoulder to force his way out of the apartment, slamming the door.

_"I'm not gonna let you hurt him again"_ –Keith's words got stuck on his brain as he looked to the closed entrance door. It was clear that Omar had told him about their past and what had happened between them and knowing that just made him feel bad. He took a deep breath before turning around and going back to check how Omar was doing.

_-Hey…How are you feeling? Do you want some water?_ –He got close to him and pushed his shoulder down when he saw that Omar wanted to get up.

Omar looked at him and closed his eyes, giving him a wide smile. _-Hey, you're here…! I thought I was dreaming._

_-I'm here._ –He answered whispering. – _Come on; try to get some sleep because if you don't, tomorrow you'll feel like shit._

Omar looked at him and extending his arm, he grabbed his neck, pulling him closer to him.

_-Jodeeer! Why are you so fucking handsome?_ –Omar asked, barely being able to talk properly.

Even though he knew Omar had said that because of how drunk he was, he couldn't avoid but feel a flip on his stomach at the sound of it. So, letting out a soft laugh, he ordered him:

_-Come on... You don't know what you're talking about. You should get some sleep._

_-Nooo… I don't want to… Kiss me, Ander. You… you said you would do it when I asked you to, right? Well, I'm asking you now... I want you to kiss me... and I want you to fuck me too. I miss you..._ –Omar finished that phrase with a playful smile as he pulled him closer.

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> People say children and drunkards tell the truth, right? ;)


	21. Let's fall in love for the night and…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 21 was updated.  
> Hope you like it! I'd love to know what you think about it.  
> As always, thanks for reading, commenting or leaving a Kudo... It makes my day!  
> P.S. The title, as you may have noticed, is inspired by the FINNEAS song, Let's fall in love for the night.  
> xoxo ;)

*******

Omar looked at him and extending his arm, he grabbed his neck, pulling him closer to him.

_-Jodeeer! Why are you so fucking handsome?_ –Omar asked, barely being able to talk properly.

Even though he knew Omar had said that because of how drunk he was, he couldn't avoid but feel a flip on his stomach at the sound of it. So, letting out a soft laugh, he ordered him:

_-Come on... You don't know what you're talking about. You should get some sleep._

_-Nooo… I don't want to… Kiss me, Ander. You… you said you would do it when I asked you to, right? Well, I'm asking you now... I want you to kiss me... and I want you to fuck me too._ –Omar finished that phrase with a playful smile as he pulled him closer.

*******

**Chapter 21. Let's fall in love for the night and…**

**_(Ander)_ **

Ander swallowed as he was closing his eyes for a few seconds before raising his arms to his neck to let go from Omar's embrace, trying to convince him this was not a good idea. Still, it seemed that he wouldn't give up so easily since Omar was staring at his mouth while he smiled at him as if he was the most important person in his life.

_-Omar, listen…_

_-You still like me? Because I still believe you're the hottest guy in the world… -_ Omar interrupted him as he struggled to take off his jeans, and once he made it, he threw them to the other side of the bed, wearing just a white cotton t-shirt.

_-Joder, Omar! You're killing me; you know that?_ –He whispered, and without being able to avoid it, he put his thumb up to reach Omar's lips and caress them slowly.

As Omar felt that contact, he let out a groan and closing his eyes, parted his mouth to lick Ander's finger and nibble gently, provoking in Ander a pang of desire, making him get hard almost immediately. Hence, he had to appeal all his willpower not to do what he'd longed the most for a long time.

_-I swear that if you were sober, I'd fuck you right now…_ -He confessed with a deep voice, as he felt how every single nerve ending of his body was convulsing because of Omar's tongue.

Omar giggled as a response and shook his head in denial.

_-I'm not so drunk… I just drank just a few drinks…_ -He defended himself, dragging the words.

_-Yeah, sure… I can see that…_ -He mocked, moving his hand to caress Omar's temple.

_-C'mon! Kiss me… -_ Omar begged with a hoarse voice, moving the head in an attempt to recover the contact of his tongue with Ander's thumb, but as soon as he found his palm, he started to kiss it with parted lips.

Ander held his breath and got his face closer to Omar's, to pose his lips in the temple.

_-No… Not like this…_ -Omar complained, trying to catch Ander's lips with his.

Ander dodged him and raising both hands in each side of Omar's face, whispered in a very low tone:

_-I swear to you that I'd like the most in this precise moment is kissing you until you couldn't breathe… But not like this. I want you to be completely aware of what you are doing, so ask me tomorrow, and I promise you that I won't hesitate._

_-Andeeer!_ -Omar moaned in response when Ander broke the contact.

_-You need to rest, Omar._

And before he could do something that he'd regret, he stood up and turned off the lights from the nightstand. As he walked out of the room, he heard Omar grumble, but he didn't turn over; instead, he headed to the bathroom and undressed. A cold shower would be the only thing that could help him in those moments.

*******

The next morning he woke up before the mobile’s alarm started to buzz, and just for a moment, he felt disoriented. Almost immediately, the events of the previous night made him remember that he was staying at Omar’s flat. He stretched over the fluffy mattress and stifling a yawn, tried to remember what he had dreamed of.

He knew he’d dreamed of Omar, and it had been something marvelous, but as the minutes passed and he began to recover the conscience, the images started to fade away from his mind making each time harder to retain them. He closed his eyes trying to focus, clinging to the one single image he was able to recover. As soon as he could visualize it clear and sharp as if it were a recent memory, he outlined a huge smile.

It was a sunny day, and in the distance, he could hear voices and children laughing and playing in a park. He was sitting on the grass, and next to him, a little girl with hazel eyes and bushy eyebrows was reading him a story; and if he concentrated enough, he might be able to replay that tender little voice in his mind.

Suddenly, an all too familiar voice was calling him by his name, making him turn to meet the owner of that deep voice. Omar was a few meters away, looking more handsome than ever. He was carrying in his arms a furry honey-colored puppy that looked as if it had just rescued it from the street; when the girl saw him, she bounced towards him calling him daddy, while she stroked the pooch excitedly. Omar kissed her on the cheek and then turned to him and kissed him softly on the lips.

That was all he could remember, but it was enough to make him feel happy. _"What would Omar think if I told him my dream?"_ With a sigh, he pushed that thought aside and got up to head to the shower.

Twenty minutes later, he put the coffee pot on while he made some toasts for breakfast. Once the coffee was ready, and the toasts were served, he headed to Omar's room. He took a deep breath before opening the door in a vain attempt to be impassive, since just thinking that there was a chance they could get back together made him freak out.

- _Hey… morning_. -He greeted him, sitting at the edge of the bed.

The answer he received was a grunt followed by a curse. Omar put a hand up to cover his eyes while muttering:

_-Joder! Please turn off the light… I feel like my head is going to explode._

_-What light? It's the sun's light... it's already nine in the morning..._

_-Agh, Nooo…!_ -He complained as he covered his head with the sheet.

_-Do you remember what happened last night?_ -He asked, lowering his voice, feeling his pulse quicken.

For a few seconds, Omar didn't move, but he did stop complaining until finally he pulled the sheet aside and looked at him. When his eyes met Omar's, he didn't like what he saw. He knew beforehand that his answer would be very different from what he had imagined, so he stopped smiling as he looked at him expectantly.

_-If I remember what happened last night...?_ -He repeated, as if trying to remember. - _Last night... I was with Keith, but... afterward, I don't remember anything at all. How did I get here?_

Hearing it, Ander let out a snort in disappointment, and although he was trying to decipher whether Omar's amnesia was real or feigned, he knew it didn't matter since the result would be the same. They were back where they had started... and all the words that Omar had confessed to him had disappeared along with the drunkenness.

_-I see… You really don't remember anything?_

Omar shook his head, stifling a groan of pain.

_-Why are you asking, tío? Did I do or say something I shouldn't have?_

Ander gave a sad grin but quickly put himself together, shaking his head.

_-Not at all. Last night your friend brought you home, and as soon as you put your head on the pillow, you dozed off..._

_-I see…_ -Omar nodded as he sat down on the bed. _-I drank too much last night, and now I have a terrible hangover, tío._

_-I can guess… I made coffee and made something for you to have breakfast, by the way. I've to go because in a little while I'll have an interview at the university, so I'll see you later, okay? -_ And standing up, he left the room.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

****

As soon as Ander closed the door, he dropped back onto the pillow with a strangled groan. It hadn't been a lie when he said that he felt his head would explode at any moment, but it was true that he had lied when he said he didn't remember anything that had happened the night before.

Shame had prevented him from confessing that he clearly remembered how he had almost had to beg him to kiss him and... He had failed in the attempt. He still couldn't believe it… and just remembering it made him feel overwhelmed. Last night it had been so easy to open up to Ander and tell him out loud what he wanted, but in the light of day and with no alcohol in his blood, he could see it was a mistake. The problem was, in the last forty-eight hours, he was making one mistake after another, and if he didn't do something about it, he would end up getting laid with him.

_"As if it were just about fucking... you know that if it were just that, it wouldn't represent any problem at all."_

He sat on the mattress, flexing his legs to encircle them with his arms, while he felt the sun caress his skin. Unable to help it, he began to fantasize about what would have happened if Ander hadn't rejected him.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_from @piper_ayuso Ig account_

He put that thought aside and breathed in the scent of fresh coffee that wafted through the apartment, encouraging him to get up.

  
Not sure if Ander would still be there or not, he decided to put on some sweatpants before leaving his room. He didn't want to risk going out naked -as he usually used to- and running into Ander in the kitchen... He had enough with the pathetic show he had performed a few hours before.

The apartment was completely silent when he left his room. The only trace of Ander was the trail of perfume combined with his aftershave lotion that was still floating in the air. He took a deep breath, and dozens of bittersweet memories rushed through his mind. He continued on his way to the kitchen and was surprised to see that on the counter isle, Ander had left him some toasts and the coffee pot on.

Feeling a strange sensation on his chest due to that cute detail, he took a cup from the cupboard and dropped onto one of the stools in front of the pair of toasts. He took a sip of coffee and taking out his cell phone, began to review the pending tasks that he had to complete that week. He had breakfast as fast as he could and went to take a shower since his first class was at eleven am, and he couldn't be late for any reason.

The day passed without major setbacks. Except for the headache that tortured him most of the morning and Keith's somewhat sullen demeanor when he ran into him in their last class, everything else flowed more or less well. And because the campus was big enough, he never crossed paths with Ander.

_-What's the matter with you?_ -He asked Keith when they both left the classroom.

_-Nothing, why?_ -He growled, hanging his backpack over his shoulder.

_–I don't know, man… You look weird. I know yesterday I had more drinks than expected, and…_

_-It's just your imagination, Omar. Hey, would you like to have lunch together?_

Omar looked at him and shook his head.

_-Maybe another time, I want to take advantage of the fact that I don't have to go to work in the afternoon to sleep for a while because the hangover hit me badly. And speaking of which… I wanted to thank you for not letting me drink anymore and for taking me home. If it hadn't been for you, who knows how I'd be now._

_-You bet, dude, anytime... You know you can count on me, right? By the way, uh... did your... ex, tell you something about me?_

Hearing the insecurity in Keith's voice, Omar raised a puzzled eyebrow.

_-Anything about you? No… He didn't say anything to me, why?_

_-For nothing… it's just that we had a small argument, and it certainly wasn't very pleasant, but it's not something worth talking about._

- _A small argument? Did he say something to bother you?_ -He insisted interested in knowing what they had talked about.

_-It was nothing, I told you, forget about it; I guess I'll see you tomorrow then._ -And clapping his hand with his, Keith strode away towards the parking lot.

*******

Living with Ander turned out to be much less complicated than he had thought. Apparently, Ander had taken his pitiful behavior that first night in his apartment quite philosophically. Since at no time did Ander allude to it, to the point of making him think that he had not taken seriously the things he had said when he was drunk. And although he should be relieved, a small part of him regretted it.

As the days went by, he got used to his presence, to having him around and knowing that when he got home at night, he would see him sitting in front of his laptop. He used to work on his final project to conclude the semester at the Universidad Complutense de Madrid in order not to have any impediment to achieving the transfer.

Unwittingly, they had established a pleasant dynamic, since as soon as Omar walked through the door, Ander would put the computer aside, and between the two of them, they would prepare dinner and chat about their day. In this way, he learned that the arrangements for his admission were going from strength to strength. He had passed the TOEFL without any problem, and everything seemed to indicate that in January, he would be one more student at NYU. Also, they didn't speak again about the possibility of Ander turning down the scholarship.

It had been almost two weeks since Ander had arrived in New York, and it was the first weekend in a long time that Omar hadn't hung out with Keith. And to tell the truth, it wasn't clear to him if it was because he had unconsciously avoided him or the fact that Keith was distant with him. They saw each other almost daily at the university, but they only touched on school-related subjects, so Omar knew he should sit down and talk with him, but he had been putting it off.

As for Ander, deep down, Omar was glad that Ander was staying with him, since thanks to that daily coexistence, and much to his regret, he began to remember why he had fallen in love with him in the first place. Ander was easygoing and with a peculiar sense of humor, causing him more than once to find himself laughing out loud at all the nonsense that occurred to him. In the same way, he was able to relive his quirks, and this time, far from being irritated, they seemed to him adorable, making him curve his lips in a goofy smile.

Some nights, after dinner, they would lie down in the living room to watch whatever was on television, or simply, they would stay for hours chatting about any subject until Ander reminded him that he had to get up early the next day. So, reluctantly he would mumble _"good night,"_ and then each one of them headed to their respective room.

For those and many more reasons that he could continue listing, he inevitably began to question what it would be like to have a relationship with Ander again. Still, the fear that he would hurt him also made him discard the idea immediately. Even though he tried very hard to keep his feelings in check, he couldn't help that when Ander appeared next to him, his belly would jump when he heard his voice, or when he smelled his aftershave lotion when he got out of the shower, something inside him would stir like a teenager.

When the elevator doors opened, he pushed those thoughts aside and crossed the hall to enter the apartment. The smile faded from his face, seeing that Ander was not sitting on his usual stool in front of the kitchen isle working on his computer as he had done all those nights.

_-Ander?_ –He called him, as he entered the room where Ander was staying. Very close to the doorframe was his suitcase. He went to the closet and felt an unpleasant sensation when he didn't see his clothes hanging.

He snorted and forced himself to calm down, trying to put things in perspective. He had no idea where Ander might be, or why he had packed his suitcase, but he knew he would find out soon. So as he could, he pulled himself together and headed to the kitchen to make dinner. Suddenly, a feeling of loneliness like he had never felt before washed over him at the thought that Ander would leave... again.

Almost half an hour later, he heard the door open and Ander entered the apartment, hanging the key that Omar had given him in the keyholder at the entrance.

_-Hey! I'm sorry, I lost track of time…_ –Ander greeted him, a slow smile tugging at his mouth, totally oblivious to the whirlwind of emotions that Omar was fighting against.

_-Hey…_ -Omar replied in turn, trying to smile too but without much success.

_-I'm making a salad and the pasta is already in the oven…_ -He continued talking, as he cut a tomato into small cubes, but as soon as the words left his mouth, reality hit him squarely.

From the beginning, he had been clear that this coexistence would only last a few days and that as soon as Ander concluded the procedures, he would return to Madrid to finish his pending issues and return again, but to start living in the campus _'_ dorms... not with him. So he had to realize, they were neither a couple, nor did they have a future together, and all this domestic coexistence had an expiration date.

_-It smells good... How can I help you?_ -Ander asked, approaching him, while he took a piece of tomato to take it to his mouth, causing Omar to lose concentration on what he was doing when he saw how he tasted it.

Everything happened so fast that when he wanted to react, the knife had already made a small cut on his finger causing the blood to begin to gush out.

_-Mierda!_ –He yelled, dropping the knife; but before he noticed it, Ander took his hand and gently brought his finger to his mouth.

As if by magic the pain disappeared since he was only aware of how difficult it was to maintain control so as not to send everything to hell and kiss him in that instant.

_-It's just a superficial cut…_ -Ander's voice came out hoarse once he stopped sucking on Omar's finger to examine it carefully. Omar knew him well and realize that Ander was just as affected as he was.

_-Are you okay, Omar?_ -He whispered so low that it was hard for him to understand the question.

_-No, I mean, yes. It was nothing..._ –Omar closed his eyes for a second, feeling confused and unable to string another sentence.

When their eyes met again, he saw Ander's breathing quicken as he lowered his gaze to his lips.

_-Omar…_ -Ander seemed to hesitate for a few seconds before continuing to speak. _-Can I confess something to you?_

_-Aha…_ -He gasped barely in an audible whisper.

Ander leaned forward, intentionally brushing his lips against his earlobe.

_-I promised that I wouldn't kiss you until you asked me to, but... Jodeeer! I really... I can't take it anymore._

*******


	22. Something magical

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey! Chapter 22 is posted!  
> I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.  
> Thanks as always for reading, commenting, and/or leaving a Kudo! ;)  
> xoxo

*******

When their eyes met again, he saw Ander's breathing quicken as he lowered his gaze to his lips.

_-Omar…_ -Ander seemed to hesitate for a few seconds before continuing to speak. _-Can I confess something to you?_

_-Aha…_ -He gasped barely in an audible whisper.

Ander leaned forward, intentionally brushing his lips against his earlobe.

_-I promised that I wouldn't kiss you until you asked me to, but... Jodeeer! I really... I can't take it anymore._

*******

**Chapter 22. Something magical**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_-Ander… please don't do this._ -His voice trembled slightly.

His words lacked conviction, and Ander could see the indecision reflected in Omar's face as he stepped back desperately to put distance as if he knew his self-determination could falter at any moment.

_-Why not? Tell me you don't want the same as I do._ -He challenged him, stepping forward to lean his forehead against Omar's while closing his eyes. He forced himself to clench his fists on each side of his body to keep from touching him.

He could hear Omar's ragged breathing blending into his own as he felt his heartbeat speed up accordingly. For a few seconds, he waited for Omar to react, but he didn't. When he opened his eyes again, he could see the struggle Omar was waging inside him, so he decided to confront him.

_-Jodeeer, Omar! Why don't you just accept it and stop fighting at once?_

As if he would have pulled a thread and thereby unleashed an avalanche of emotions for so long contained, he saw the exact moment when Omar made up his mind. Ander felt the firm touch of Omar's hands on either side of his face as he stared at him without uttering a single word.

They stayed looking at each other for several seconds, getting lost in the depths of each other's eyes, until Ander saw him curl his lips slightly in that smile he loved so much. At that moment, he felt that all their experiences together passed in front of them to stay behind; that night, they would start writing a new story, and this time he wouldn't make the same mistakes of the past. 

They were so close, Ander could feel like if an electric current involves them, and for a moment, he wished time would stop right there, in that warm and perfect bubble where only the two of them mattered. Although what he wanted the most was to get lost in Omar's lips, he needed Omar to make the first move, and he didn't have to wait much longer for that to happen.

Omar approached him, closing the little space that remained between them, brushing his lips against his own slowly, as if he wanted to lengthen that moment as well. As soon as Ander felt Omar's tongue slip into his mouth, he closed his eyes, abandoning himself to that incredible sensation. Ander parted his lips to let Omar explore his mouth, giving him control. He could feel that skillful caress weaken his entire body, and as soon as he heard Omar moan against his mouth, they both lost control.

The kiss was getting deeper and deeper, and the choppy breath of both confused with muffled moans was the only thing that was heard. Then, little by little, the intensity dropped until the kisses they shared became sweet, full of promise. And in that instant, Ander felt the world stop around them. That night, only the two of them existed. They remained embraced for a moment while Ander rocked Omar in his arms, whispering to him how much he had missed him. Omar laced his fingers with his and tugged on his hand to go to his room; after all, dinner could wait.

Ander got lost in Omar's caresses, in the softness of his lips, in the taste of his skin, and the intensity of his look. As they kissed, he felt him gently push him to fall backwards against the mattress. Soon, Omar straddled him, and his hands began to caress his abdomen to move up to his pectorals, pulling his shirt aside while kissing his torso. With his teeth, he caught one of his nipples, licking it, which made Ander moan with pleasure.

With nimble fingers, Omar unbuttoned his jeans to slide his hand into his boxers, and when he found his slightly hard cock, he heard Omar make a sound of satisfaction. In one swift movement, Ander rolled over to be on top of him, and with his hips, he pressed against Omar's body to immobilize him.

_-Can we go slowly?_ -He pleaded against Omar's mouth. _-I've been wanting this moment for so long that I want to extend it as long as possible._

Omar nodded, dropping his hands, hinting with that movement that he was at his mercy. Pleased, Ander smiled and stood up to undress; when he was completely naked, he stripped Omar of his clothes and then placed himself between his legs and started kissing him very slowly, as he knew Omar liked it.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

First, he kissed him wetly along his pelvis, and then he passed his tongue along his inner thighs but expressly avoiding his cock. He continued to explore his body by gently nibbling on it at the hipbone, smelling his skin in the process, and enjoying Omar's hearty laugh.

_-Stop! -You're tickling me!_ -He complained between laughter, struggling to get loose.

Ander decided to give him a break, so he let go for a moment to concentrate on giving him pleasure. He ran his tongue over the tip of Omar's cock, gently caressing the slit, savoring the first few drops of the precum. On automatic, Omar's laughter ceased, emitting a muffled groan instead. That salty taste, made him unable to contain himself any longer by sliding it entirely into his mouth, pressing it against his palate, while he sucked it in with a little more force by adjusting the rhythm.

Ander looked up and found Omar's eyes veiled with desire. He stared at him as Omar gasped lightly, closing his hands to tighten the sheets under him. Omar leaned an elbow against the mattress and pulled him towards him to embrace him tightly and capture his lips with his own, deepening the caress.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-If you really want us to extend the moment, you're going to have to stop doing that because if you keep going that way, I'm not going to last much longer._ -He whispered to him when Ander stopped kissing him.

Ander chuckled and then kissed him on the jaw and continued down his neck.

_-Vale..._ -Ander whispered after a while in which he did nothing but kiss him tenderly.

Omar lay down next to him and looked him in the eyes. His lips were swollen from the shared kisses, and his pupils were dilated.

_-I missed you._ -Omar confessed, looking down. - _I had forgotten how good it feels to be in your arms._

In response, Ander wrapped one arm around Omar's waist to draw him closer and kissed the corner of his mouth. 

_-I missed you too... And at this moment, what I want the most is to be inside you._ -He confessed hoarsely. 

In response, Omar stretched out his arm towards the nightstand, and opening the drawer, he pulled out a tube of lube; for a fraction of a second, he saw the doubt in Omar's eyes when he also handed him a package of condoms.

_-I think we should use them... You've slept with other guys too_. -He said by way of explanation.

_-Fine..._ -He replied after a moment, struggling with the jealousy he felt when he pictured Omar with Keith. 

It hadn't crossed his mind to use a condom until Omar suggested it. And even though he knew he had no right to feel that way, he couldn't help it; when it came to Omar, that feeling of possessiveness was stronger than he was. 

Contrary to what Omar thought, ironically, he hadn't gotten laid with anyone else in the last few months, except for the brief relationship he had with Nacho. But at that moment, he remembered what he had led Omar to believe when he phoned him on his birthday. He had to find a way to address that issue with him later.

_-Is something wrong?_ -Omar asked, raising an eyebrow.

_-Not at all, everything is fine._ -Ander lied as he smiled weakly, trying to push those thoughts aside.

_-Vale..._ -Omar approached him and ran a hand over his head, tucking his fingers between his curls and drawing him in, gently biting his bottom lip.

As they kissed, Ander heard the click of the lube cap opening, so he pulled away from Omar to find a playful look. Without saying a word, Omar squeezed the tube firmly, dropping a generous amount onto Ander's palm, then plopping face down on the mattress with his legs apart.

Seeing him in that position, Ander couldn't stop his mouth from drying out, while he felt a pull in his crotch due to the anticipation. He knelt between Omar's legs and slowly slipped a finger between his buttocks, while with the other free hand he caressed his back along the spine.

With the index finger, he began to go around his entrance, and after a brief recognition, he introduced it into it. As soon as he began to turn the finger inside his body, making imaginary circles, Omar spread his legs even more, shuddering in response to such an intimate caress.

_-Do you like it this way?_ -He whispered in his ear, stopping moving his finger for a few seconds.

_-Jodeeer! Don't stop..._ -He gasped, moving his hips against his hand.

Omar felt so tight that Ander felt his cock react to that thought, jerking with a slight involuntary movement. He was dying to sink into him, but he needed Omar to be dilated enough not to hurt him. He inserted a second finger and gently pushed, curving both fingers until he found that little button, that sweet spot that he knew so well, and that he knew the response it would provoke in Omar.

And he was not disappointed. Omar pushed with his knees to lift his hips even higher, making Ander's fingers go deeper into him. To see Omar's body trembling with pleasure and need as he gasped for his name was more than he could bear. He withdrew his fingers and immediately heard a groan of protest, turning to him to see why he had deprived him of such pleasant sensations.

_-Shh... Calm down._ -He whispered to him, noticing a slight tremor in his voice. Apparently, Omar was not the only one who was about to lose his sanity. 

As fast as his erratic fingers would allow him, he broke the foil wrapper and slid the latex over his cock. He looked for the lube, but when he realized it was too far away, he dropped a trickle of saliva on Omar's ass. Not that he needed much more lube, but he still wanted to make sure it wouldn't cause him the slightest discomfort. Then he brought both hands to Omar's hips to lift him up and align himself against his entrance.

Slowly, he sank inside him, and as he did so, he heard the light gasps coming from Omar's lips, making that moment unforgettable. He held his breath when he felt Omar's muscles squeeze him so tight that when he was fully inside, he had to stay still for a few seconds. He needed to control himself, or else he would cum right away, ruining the fun.

_-Nene, jodeeer! I need you to move!_ -Omar hissed, moving his hips against him.

_-Wait..._ -He whispered, dropping his weight on Omar's back and making them both lie face down. It was terrific to have him like that, underneath him.

Ander passed both arms underneath Omar's chest to leverage and hold him by the shoulders as he began to move very slowly. They had never made love in that position before, but he discovered in wonder that it could become one of his favorites. With his legs, he pushed himself a little more and more to increase the strength of his thrusts as he tried to capture Omar's mouth to kiss him.

Soon, they began to coupled, setting a much deeper and faster pace, while both moaned louder and louder. When Ander started to feel that at any moment, the orgasm would reach him, he moved his hand looking for Omar's cock. In that movement, they shifted position slightly, just enough for Ander to grab Omar's cock and start massaging it while he continued to move inside him.

It was something magical because, after so much time apart, their bodies quickly found synchronicity. As if their skin had a memory of its own and the certainty that they belonged to each other. They fucked until the pleasure was too much until their bodies trembled, but it seemed that it would never be enough to feel satiated from each other.

A couple more thrusts and they both came almost at the same time. Ander closed his eyes and clenched his teeth at that indescribable feeling of happiness that ran through his body, while he felt Omar cumming in his hand, emitting a kind of sob. 

_-Hey... Are you okay, Omar?_ -He asked, somewhat concerned after he knotted the condom to put it aside. He tried to roll over him to look him in the eye, but Omar wouldn't let him; instead, he kept his back to him as he reached out to rub his eyelids.

_-Yeah...I'm okay_. -Omar muttered after a moment, leaning against his body with his back to him, avoiding his gaze. - _Hug me..._ -Omar whispered, resting his head on his arm.

Lying on his side, Ander spooned him in his arms and did not want to insist anymore, but he could almost swear that Omar had cried at the end, causing in him a feeling of uncertainty. Their sweaty bodies felt hot and sticky from the exertion, but he didn't care at all. There was nothing at that moment that he wanted more than to hold Omar in his arms.

They remained silent for quite some time. Long after their breaths had normalized and their heartbeats had returned to a leisurely rhythm. As Ander thought about the future, he would occasionally run his fingertips down Omar's back, almost reflexively. 

_-Tomorrow I return to Madrid. I need to conclude the procedures for my transfer and leave everything in order before finally returning._

Omar didn't make any comments about it, but Ander felt his body tighten automatically, and his breathing became a little faster. He waited a few more seconds to see if Omar would say something, but when he didn't, Ander continued talking.

_-I was thinking that since you are not planning to go to Madrid this year to spend the winter holidays with your family, I could bring my trip forward so that we could spend those days here together... It would be nice to receive the New Year in Times Square. What do you think?_

_-I don't know, Ander... I don't think it's a good idea. Besides, I'll probably go with Keith, Matt, and Jules to spend those days in the Hamptons. Jules' family has a house there and has invited us._

When he heard Keith's name, Ander felt as if Omar had slapped him; especially after what they had just shared. So, as best he could, he tried to be calm before speaking.

_-Omar? Is everything okay?_ -This time he leaned on one elbow to look at him.

Omar moved to lie on his back and looked at him with a severe expression on his face.

_-Yes, it's okay, don't worry._

_-Omar..._

_-What? Everything's okay, Ander._

_-No, it's not fucking okay... We just made love, I propose that we spend the holidays together, and you tell me you're going with that asshole?_

_-Let's make things clear. We fucked, and I don't need to tell you how wonderful it was... we both feel it, but this doesn't change anything, Ander._

_-I don't get it..._ -He mumbled, puzzled.

_-Look, I'm not going to lie to you... I still have feelings for you, and the sex between us has always been amazing, but that doesn't mean we should be together. We can keep going like this... and see where it goes or..._

_-But Omar..._

_-Listen to me, Ander._ -He interrupted him. _-You'll start a life here shortly, and you'll meet other people. Maybe then you'll realize that this kind of relationship we've had all these years is because we've both wanted to hold on to the illusion of that first love... but maybe that's all it is... an illusion, and the reality is that we may not be meant to be together._

Ander couldn't believe his ears. Suddenly, he felt sick, as if that reality Omar was talking about had hit him in the chest. It seemed that everything he had done to get there hadn't been worthwhile.

_-Is that what you think? -Really? -_ He challenged him, feeling disappointed.

Omar was silent for so long that Ander thought he wouldn't answer anything else, but in the end, he opened up to him.

_-I don't know, Ander... Maybe I partly think so, or perhaps I'm not strong enough to suffer another disappointment. Call me a coward, if you want... but at this point, I'm not sure I want to be in a relationship with you._

_-I see..._ -He replied as he stood up. _-So what's this going to be like? Are we just gonna fuck, then?_

He didn't wait for Omar to answer. He left there walking naked to his room, closing the door gently behind him as he tried to hold back his tears vainly. Not only had he left his clothes in Omar's room, but also his dreams and hopes.

*******


	23. Si te vas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 23 is ready. It was a bit difficult because I had a complicated weekend, but in the end, I think I'm satisfied with the result. Although, you, my dear reader, are the best judge.  
> xoxo ;)

*******

Ander couldn't believe his ears. Suddenly, he felt sick, as if that reality Omar was talking about had hit him in the chest. It seemed that everything he had done to get there hadn't been worthwhile.

_-Is that what you think? -Really? -_ He challenged him, feeling disappointed.

Omar was silent for so long that Ander thought he wouldn't answer anything else, but in the end, he opened up to him.

_-I don't know, Ander... Maybe I partly think so, or perhaps I'm not strong enough to suffer another disappointment. Call me a coward, if you want... but at this point, I'm not sure I want to be in a relationship with you._

_-I see..._ -He replied as he stood up. _-So what's this going to be like? Are we just gonna fuck, then?_

He didn't wait for Omar to answer. He left there walking naked to his room, closing the door gently behind him as he tried to hold back his tears needlessly. Not only had he left his clothes in Omar's room, but also his dreams and hopes.

*******

**Chapter 23. Si te vas**

**_(Omar)_ **

As soon as he heard Ander close the door, he let the tears that he had been holding for the last half hour run freely down his cheek. He felt a burning lump on his throat, and that wouldn't allow him to breathe normally. He tried to recover, but it was useless; even when he was the one who had decided not to keep going with the relationship, he couldn't help but feel devastated.

He kept repeating that it was for the best; that he had to let time arrange things so as not to risk another disappointment. But the emptiness he felt in his chest, even causing physical pain, seemed to mock him, shouting that what was between them could be anything but an illusion.

Omar was perfectly aware that this would happen, and that was the main reason for him to not sleep with Ander during all those days. Of all the times he and Ander had made love that one had been by far the most meaningful one he could remember.

He could still feel the warm trace of Ander's kisses on his skin, the tenderness with which he had spooned him in his arms, making him feel as if he really was the most important person in his life. And when they both reached the orgasm together, it was more than he could handle, and in that instant, he felt as if he were broken into a thousand pieces, and a part of his soul had been lost forever. 

He had never experienced anything like that. He had been overwhelmed by it so much that when he finally felt liberated by it, he felt like something inside him had broken as if a switch had been flipped and tears found their way through an open water tap without being able to be held back. He suppressed one last sob and put his hands to his lips, trying to erase the memory of Ander's kisses without being successful.

He would have sworn that he would hardly fall asleep since the warmth that Ander's body had left by his side was a constant reminder of what could have been, but it wasn't because he had decided it that way; because he was so scared to leave it all behind and start over.

It was a constant inner fight between his subconscious and his conscious mind. The first one told him to trust, to simply close his eyes and let himself fall from the cliff, that Ander would be down to catch him. But his conscious part was the one that kept holding on with all his strength, the one that told him if he did it, there was a chance Ander wouldn't be there to catch him, and telling him, he wouldn't be capable of recovering from another disappointment like that.

Little by little, he started feeling how his eyelids felt heavier and heavier until he finally fell into a deep sleep. He slept without interruptions until the first rays of sun started being filtered by one of the curtains in his room, making him open his eyes.

The first thing that came to his mind was Ander and the memories from the night before. He pulled his legs out of bed and let them hang on the side while he stretched out his arms above his head. His body was numb, and he had a slight headache. Ander's clothes were still scattered on the floor, mixed with his own. He stood up and walked, evading them to head toward the closet. He put on a gray shirt and a pair of jeans before leaving the room.

Ander was sitting in front of the kitchen isle, on the stool he always used to sit on, and right in front of him was a cereal bowl. He had a straight face and didn't look away once Omar was in front of him. Omar looked at him for a few seconds as he had breakfast; his hair was wet, and he smelled of soap. Next to the cereal bowl, there was his laptop; it was on askance Omar so that Ander had his itinerary open. When he looked to the front door, he saw Ander's suitcase along with a smaller briefcase on the side and immediately felt his pulse racing.

_-Morning…_

Ander ignored him for a few more seconds until he finally closed his laptop and met his gaze. Except for the dark circles under his eyes, there was nothing else to reveal his state of mind, but Omar knew it would be a difficult time.

_-Hey…_ -Ander said in such a low voice that, for a moment, Omar thought that he had imagined it, and even more when he saw that he immediately went back to stare at his cereal bowl.

_-Ander, look, about last night…. I… I don't know what to say to you._

Ander looked up and let out a bitter laughter.

_-It seems to me that you've already said it all… I really don't think there's anything left to say._

_-I see…_ -He murmured, feeling like a total douche. – _At what time does your flight leave?_

_-A couple more hours. Actually, I'm almost leaving._

He took the bowl to his mouth to drink the rest of the milk and took it to the sink. As he was washing the bowl and spoon, he began to talk.

_-Thank you for the hospitality, Omar. It was very nice of you to let me stay here for a few days._

_-Yeah, well… you really don't have to thank me at all._ –He said in response, trying to stay calm.

_-Whatever..._ -He heard Ander replay. And let out a sigh, he started to put the laptop inside his case and then put it inside his backpack and hang it on his shoulders.

_-Bye, Omar._ –He said goodbye, standing two steps away from him.

Omar felt that everything was going to hell, but he didn't dare say anything else. He could only see Ander, who by then couldn't hide the sadness on his face, which made him lower his head.

Ander put his hand under his chin, forcing him to look up so their eyes could meet. Omar looked at him hesitantly, trying to loosen from his hand, but Ander wouldn't let him. He felt Ander brush his cheek with a slight tremor in his fingertips as he cleared his throat before speaking again.

_-I hope you don't regret this choice…_ -And without waiting for an answer, he turned his back on him and started heading towards the front door.

_-Ander, wait!_ –Omar shouted as he got striding closer while Ander grabbed his luggage.

_-What?_

_-Don't leave like this, please…._

_-And how is it that you want me to leave? Feeling happy? I honestly can't get you, joder._

_-When are you planning to come back? You know, to get everything ready before college starts._

The way Ander looked at him made his whole body shiver.

_-I don't know if I'm coming back, Omar._

_-What?_ – He asked very quietly, feeling fear begin to settle in his gut.

_-What for? What's the point? When I got here, I asked you to think about it and give me an answer before I left… Well, you've already given it to me, so I don't see why I should come back._

As he said it, Ander fixed his gaze on him, but Omar wasn't able to hold it back.

_-Ander…_ -He clenched his fists, but before he could understand the impact of his decision, Ander said goodbye.

_-Bye, Omar._ –He hugged him so briefly that when Omar registered it, Ander had already let him go.

Omar didn't stop looking at him until Ander closed the door behind him, but never, during the seconds he got his luggage, did Ander look at him again.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

*******

_Two weeks later_

**_(Keith)_ **

_-The winter vacations are turning out to be very different from how I had imagined them, believe me._ -I complain to Jules while we wait in line at Starbucks to get our order.

_-That's what I think..._ -She agrees, as she checks something on her phone. 

I look sideways, and I can see Omar's name written on the screen. I shake my head, and I'm about to ask what he has written when a rather attractive guy with Mediterranean features asks us with a big smile what we are going to order. 

Jules puts her phone away and starts explaining the way she wants her beverage.

_-A green tea matcha latte, with a spoonful and a half of mascabado sugar, soy milk, no whipped cream, and large size... please._

If Jules's elaborate explanation confused him, he didn't show it at all; on the contrary, he seems used to it, so after putting Jules's name on the cup with a marker, I get his full attention.

_-For me, a black coffee, no sugar, small size, please._ -I explain, twisting my mouth slightly as I sneer at Jules.

_-Sure, your name is?_ –He asks me, giving me a big smile, and while he does so, I can realize why he has caught my attention in the first place. His name is Antonio, and he has a strong accent, but it wasn't until he said something in Spanish to one of the girls who made the drinks next to him that I notice the unmistakable Spanish _"seseo"._ The guy reminds me of Omar.

_-Keith…_ -I manage to answer when I notice that he looks at me expectantly.

_-Okay, Keith, just wait a minute, and your drinks will be ready; you have a great day._

I'm about to answer him something witty when I feel Jules pull my arm and drag me to one of the vacant tables.

_-Can you control yourself? He's not Omar…Even though I have to admit they look alike._

_-Really? I hadn't noticed._ – I respond by playing dumb while I get rid of my coat and gloves.

_-Yeah, right…_ -She smiles while rolling her eyes at me.

Even though winter is officially a few days away, the temperature has started to drop dramatically, and according to the weather app, it will be snowing this weekend. The same weekend that it supposed Omar and I initially would accompany Jules and Matt to spend those days in the Hamptons.

Jules's words remind me even more of my frustrated vacation when she mentions that Omar has sent her a message.

_-He says he won't go with us, that he has extra work and that he will stay home to finish it._ -She lets out a sigh while staring at me.

_-What?_ –I respond as I sip on my coffee.

A week ago, I had talked to Omar, and he had already told me that he wouldn't go; when he spoke to me, he hadn't bothered to give me such a lousy excuse, so I didn't know whether to thank him or be offended.

_-Keith... Don't pretend you don't know what's going on. You need to talk to him._ -Jules looks at me, clearly annoyed.

_-What for? Apparently, he doesn't want to talk to any of us. Ever since his fucking ex-boyfriend showed up around here, Omar is a different person._

As I talk to Jules, I can't hide a hint of bitterness in my voice. I didn't realize how important Omar was in my life until I felt how little by little he was getting further and further away from me because of Ander.

_-Keith... Come on, of all of us, you are the person closest to him. And if you really love him like you say you do, you'll talk to him and talk some sense into him._

I let out a sigh and nod. I know Jules is right, but I don't know if I'm ready to let him out of my life for good. I feel a turn in my stomach when I realize that maybe this has already happened, and I haven't realized it yet.

*******

_-Who is it?_ –I hear Omar's voice on the other side of the door. I keep silent and wait. A few seconds later, he asks again, and this time I hear him much closer.

_-Jodeeer… Who's knocking?_ \- He opens the door, and I see the sadness reflected in his eyes. It is clear that I am the last person he expected to see, but even so, he tries to smile at me.

_-What's wrong with you, dude?_ –I smile, even though on the inside, the only thing I want is to hug him and make all the pain he's feeling go away.

_-Keith… How are you? Do you wanna have something to drink?_ –He asks as I watch him walk away, barefoot towards the kitchen.

The heat is on, so I take off my coat and hat before going after him and confront him directly.

_-Do you know that not even Jules bought the excuse you gave her? Why do you prefer to stay here alone instead of going with us and having a great time?_

Omar looks at me but says nothing. He looks down and takes a sip from a glass of whiskey.

_-Don't you think it's too early to drink?_

I hate to sound like a party popper because I am definitely far from one, but I know Omar, and I know that for him to be drinking like this is because he is fucked up. 

_-Really, dude? Are you telling me this?_ -I hear him mocking, but he sounds rather tired.

_-What the fuck is wrong with you? Are you gonna tell me, ah? Or are we going to keep pretending you're not this fucked up because of your ex?_

As soon as I finish speaking, I see how Omar's little resistance crumbles in front of me, and almost immediately, I see him break down. It's hard for me not to tell him what I think about it, so I bite the tip of my tongue, and instead, I go over to him and hug him while telling him everything will be fine.

After hearing the whole story and how Omar feels about it, I know what I need to do. Today more than ever, I realize how much I love him, and until this moment, I didn't know how vulnerable he is.

_-I love you, asshole! You're going to be okay, you'll see. It just takes time._ -I say goodbye to him, standing up. 

Omar smiles at me and asks me to wait for him. As I watch him head to his room, his cell phone begins to vibrate. I take it, and to my surprise, it is unlocked. It only takes me a few seconds to find what I'm looking for. I leave the phone back on the counter seconds before Omar returns with USB in his hand.

_-You forgot it last time, man._ -He says to me by way of explanation as he holds the device out to me.

I smile at him and thank him before leaving. When I am on the street, I adjust my coat and grabbing my phone, press the call key. I wait a few seconds until I finally hear a _"hola"_ on the other end of the line. 

_-Ander?_ -I mutter, unable to suppress the smile on my face _. -This is Keith._

*******


	24. Spinning over you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, chapter 24 is ready...  
> Hope you like it!  
> xoxo

*******

Omar smiles at me and asks me to wait for him. As I watch him head to his room, his cell phone begins to vibrate. I take it, and to my surprise, it is unlocked. It only takes me a few seconds to find what I'm looking for. I leave the phone back on the counter seconds before Omar returns with USB in his hand.

_-You forgot it last time, man._ -He says to me by way of explanation as he holds the device out to me.

I smile at him and thank him before leaving. When I am on the street, I adjust my coat and grabbing my phone, press the call key. I wait a few seconds until I finally hear a _"hola"_ on the other end of the line. 

_-Ander?_ -I mutter, unable to suppress the smile on my face _. -This is Keith._

*******

**Chapter 24. Spinning over you**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_-I have to admit it… he's my brother, but sometimes he can be a complete asshole._ –Nadia complained, gesturing with her hands _. –It's just that he can't be so stupid and not notice all you've done to get him back._

Listening to her, Ander grimaced and was about to respond when Marina cut him off.

_-Mom, you've said a bad word!_ -She shouted with that characteristic little voice, raising her hand to her mouth to try to suppress the laughter.

Guzmán and Ander burst out laughing while Nadia rolled her eyes before addressing her daughter, who, by the time, had turned her attention back to the coloring book in front of her.

_-I'm sorry, Marina, you're right... I shouldn't say bad words. -_ And then lowering her voice so that only Ander and Guzmán could hear her, she mumbled: _-Even though your uncle sometimes deserves it._

Guzman and Nadia had invited Ander to dinner that weekend, and after thinking about it for a while, he had decided he needed to blow off some steam. _"And who better than his best friend and his sister-in-law? Or rather ex-sister-in-law..."_ -He corrected himself mentally with a hint of bitterness.

_The truth is that I don't know what to do…_ -He confessed, taking both hands to his face to rub his eyelids. He had adopted that habit when he felt problems overwhelming.

_-What you have to do is think about your future._ –Nadia intervened. _–_ _Look, Ander, whatever happens between you and Omar, you have to be clear what it would mean to study at NYU; I do believe you shouldn't rule it out. Either way, the city is so big that if you and Omar didn't get back together, you would hardly bump into each other. It would be as if you both were living in different places, like until now, but with the advantage that you would finish your degree at one of the best universities worldwide._

_-Nadia is right, macho… Although... if you decide to leave, I want you to know that I'm gonna miss you. –_ Guzmán agreed, patting on Ander's back and kissing him on the temple.

Ander smiled melancholically, but before he could say anything, Guzman spoke again.

_-So did that asshole call you? The one that has something going on with Omar?_

Ander rolled his eyes, regretting having told Guzmán about Keith, as he didn't want Nadia to know, but apparently, his friend hadn't noticed his indiscretion as he looked at him expectantly. He still remembered the brief conversation he had had with that guy the day before, and the more he remembered it, the more pissed off he became.

_-Who has something going on with Omar?_ -Nadia asked, interested.

Ander looked at her, letting the air slowly escape, and resignedly let himself fall against the back of the sofa.

_-I met him when I was there. His name is Keith... and long story short, he's crazy about Omar._

_-Really? And did he dare to call you? Why?_ -Nadia asked, surprised.

_-Basically, he told me that Omar is sad, and it's because of me. That I need to decide what I want because I can't just appear and disappear from his life... Ha! As if that asshole knew what was going on between Omar and me!_ -He snorted indignantly, trying to restrain himself when he saw Marina looking at him sideways, but in the end, he wasn't able to achieve it.

_-And if that wasn't enough, he ended up telling me that if I decided not to return, that I should know that he would do everything at his power to make Omar happy..._

_-What a cheek! And what did you say to him?_ –Guzmán asked, intrigued.

_-I told him to fuck off._

As soon as he shared it with his friends, he felt a little better. He hadn't realized how much he needed to get it off his chest until that moment.

_-Are you angry with Omar, uncle Ander?_ -Marina asked, looking at him with those expressive green eyes.

Feeling sorry for his outburst, Ander forced a smile before answering.

_-No, of course not, sweetie._

_-Well, it's time for you, young lady, to go to bed..._ -Guzmán intervened by lifting his daughter in his arms while he looked at Ander and Nadia. _-Say goodbye to your uncle Ander and kiss your mom too._

_-I'll be right back..._ -He muttered as he took Marina into her room.

When he was alone with Nadia, he looked down and was silent, feeling totally out of place. He wasn't used to talking about his feelings, let alone with her. 

_-Ander, my brother loves you... I have no doubt. It's just that knowing him, he's afraid that things won't work out between you two again... But think about what I said before._

_Thanks..._ -He babbled, and in response, Nadia stood up and went over to him, hugging him tightly.

_-Nothing would make me happier than for both of you to fix your problems and end up together... But if you don't, don't lose this great opportunity, not for Omar or anyone else._

*******

Nadia's words echoed in his mind for days, until finally, before the week was out, Ander had decided. The year was two weeks away, which meant that once Christmas and the New Year were over, he would definitely leave Madrid to start a new life. The big question that he asked himself continuously was whether or not Omar would be part of it.

He finished eating, and after helping his mother wash the dishes, he went up to his room to buy his plane ticket. The semester would begin on January 7th, so with a couple of days' flying time before that, he would have plenty of time to settle in. He started looking for flight options, but they were so expensive, and while he had some money saved, he wasn't happy about overspending on a plane ticket. 

He extended the search dates and found a flight at almost half the price of the previous ones. The only problem was that he would have to fly on December 31st. He snorted as he looked at the screen; because of the time difference between Europe and the United States, he would be landing at JFK shortly after five in the afternoon. Although he didn't feel like spending New Year's Eve alone, the offer was extremely attractive.

After making numbers among what he would save by traveling earlier but paying for more days of lodging, he realized that the difference in fare was still considerable, so he finally bought his ticket and booked the hotel. When he received the confirmation of his reservations in the mail, he took a deep breath to let the air out little by little. It was done, and there was no turning back. He would start the year in New York and hoped he had made the right decision.

The days went by faster than he would have liked. Among the final arrangements to get everything ready and spend the holidays with his mother, father, and friends, he realized the time to move had arrived. The suitcase with his clothes was on the side of the bed, and he was finishing packing his rackets in the sports case when Guzman and Samuel entered his room.

_-Ready for us to take you to the airport, macho?_ -Samuel greeted him, shaking his hand.

_-Only you are capable of moving on December 31st, Ander..._ -Guzman complained, trying to sound upset, but Ander knew it was his way of not showing how much his departure affected him.

_-You're going to visit me, aren't you? -_ He laughed not to take the matter seriously. 

_-No doubt about it._

Between the three of them, they took the luggage downstairs, while Guzmán continued to complain as he did so.

_-Fuck, Ander! Did you bring your whole closet, man?_

_-Come on, stop arguing and help..._ -Samuel said in a tone that didn't admit complaints.

Once they put everything in the trunk, his two friends waited for him in the car to give him privacy while he said goodbye to his mother. He had already done so hours before with his father and he hadn't stopped repeating how proud he was of him for getting the athletic scholarship.

_-Did you really have to leave just today, honey?_ -His mother told him as she wiped away a tear. _-I'm going to miss you, Ander._

_-And I'm going to miss you too, mom_. -He hugged her tightly, kissing her cheek. 

_-I'm so happy for you, sweetie. I'm sure it will be a wonderful experience, and I hope you keep your promise to call me often._

_-I will, Mom. I promise. Also, I plan on coming back for the vacations, so don't be sad, okay?_

*******

As he had assumed, the flight was almost empty, and no passenger was sitting next to him. So once the aircraft reached ten thousand feet, he removed his seat belt and stretched his legs comfortably along the seats next to him. He put on his _AirPods_ and closed his eyes, trying not to think about what fate had in store for him.

As they began to descend, he put the seatback in an upright position and fastened his seat belt, looking out the window at the tall skyscrapers starting to show. If everything went as he expected, this city would be his home for the next two years.

He went through migration without any setbacks, and once he picked up his luggage, he left the airport. It wasn't snowing; however, the wind was freezing. He adjusted his jacket and lit a cigarette while reading the messages from his friends that began to pop up one after another. It was almost six o'clock in the afternoon, so in Madrid, they were just celebrating the New Year, and everyone wished him success in this new journey.

While reading a message from Rebe, his cell phone began to ring, and Omar's name appeared on the screen. His stomach turned over, making him hold his breath. He hadn't spoken to him since he left his apartment the morning after they had made love, when he left to go back to Madrid. Omar had tried to contact him only once since then, but he had ignored his call, and after that, Omar didn't call him again until today.

He closed his eyes briefly before answering. 

_-Yes?_

_-Hello.._. -He heard that deep voice, which was so painfully familiar.

_-What's up?_ -His voice sounded rough and choked when he spoke.

_-How are you?_

_-Good, I guess. And you?_

_-Same... Listen, I'm just calling to wish you a happy new year._

_"Of course... Omar thinks I'm in Madrid."_

For a moment, he hesitated to answer. He could thank him and let him believe that he was still in Madrid, or he could tell him the truth.

_"He's probably in the Hamptons with Keith by now..._ " -He remembered, his mouth feeling bitter.

_-Ander? Are you still there?_

_-Aha..._ -He muttered, clearing his throat.

_-Look, I tried to talk to you almost after you left, but I understand why you didn't answer me. I know that things have been difficult between us lately, and that's why you decided not to accept the scholarship... but I just wanted to tell you that..._

_-I have decided to take it, Omar_. -He interrupted him.

_-What?_ -He heard the surprise in his voice. _-Really? Are you coming to live in New York?_

_-After thinking about it for a while, I've decided it's an excellent opportunity for me to just let it go._

_-I understand. And when do you plan to travel? The semester starts in a few days..._

Ander bit his lips but finally forced himself to respond.

_-I actually arrived a few minutes ago. I'm at the airport, and I'm on my way to the hotel._

For a few seconds, he only heard silence on the other side of the line, until finally, Omar spoke again.

_-Joder! I didn't know... I thought you were celebrating with Guzman and the others right now..._

_-Well, you see that I don't..._

_-Where will you be spending the New Year?_

Ander put out his cigarette while drowning out a sarcastic laugh. His voice was clear and sharp when he answered.

_-In my room? Pfff... I don't know Omar, I don't plan to celebrate. Listen, I must hang up, the cab has arrived._ -He lied.

_-Hey, hey... wait! Would you like to go to Times Square?_

Ander was silent. _“What did Omar want?”_

_-It's supposed you are in the Hamptons, isn't it?_ -He asked sardonically.

_-No. I decided not to go. So what do you say? It might be cool..._

He knew he shouldn't accept. If he still had an ounce of self-preservation instinct left, he should say no. His heart was already broken, and celebrating New Year's with Omar would make him feel worse. It was clear to him what his response should be, but what came out of his lips was just the opposite.

_-What time and where shall we meet?_

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

*******


	25. Happy New Year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 25 is ready. I hope you like it. I have to say this time, I had a hard time finding inspiration, so I hope it's worth it.  
> I also want to share that I'm not sure if I will update next week. It's been a complicated time, and I'm having a hard time shaping the story as I originally planned.  
> Thanks anyway if you keep reading and I hope I won't take long to update the next one!  
> xoxo

*******

_-Where will you be spending the New Year?_

Ander put out his cigarette while drowning out a sarcastic laugh. His voice was clear and sharp when he answered.

_-In my room? Pfff... I don't know Omar, I don't plan to celebrate. Listen, I must hang up, the cab has arrived._ -He lied.

_-Hey, hey... wait! Would you like to go to Times Square?_

Ander was silent. _“What did Omar intend?”_

_-It's supposed you are in the Hamptons, isn't it?_ -He asked sardonically.

_-No. I decided not to go. So what do you say? It might be cool..._

He knew he shouldn't accept. If he still had an ounce of self-preservation instinct left, he should say no. His heart was already broken, and celebrating New Year's with Omar would make him feel worse. It was clear to him what his response should be, but what came out of his lips was just the opposite.

_-What time and where shall we meet?_

*******

**Chapter 25. Happy New Year**

**_(Omar)_ **

****

_December 31st_

He couldn't blame it on the alcohol. Although he had been drinking more than he could handle since Ander's departure, he was still sober at this point. Although if he was honest, he had to admit that maybe, just maybe, this last whiskey had given him the bravery he needed to call him. 

Once he hung up, Omar looked at the glass in front of him, and in one gulp, he finished the rest of the contents feeling his throat burning; the pair of ice cubes that had not yet melted tinkled against the glass when he put it with more force than necessary on the kitchen counter.

_"Ander is here..."_ -He said it loud and clear as if he needed to hear it to make sure he hadn't imagined the conversation they had a few seconds earlier. Unconsciously he put his fingers into his mouth and began to bite his nails in a reflex action, to reduce in vain, the anxiety that was taking hold of him.

These last weeks had been frankly shitty. When Omar became aware that after his decision, he had pushed Ander not to return, he understood the impact of his actions. At that moment, the fear that Ander would disappoint him again ceased to exist and gave way to the dread of knowing that, this time, he had lost Ander forever.

It had been like falling into a downward spiral of self-destruction and not knowing how to stop it. So after trying to talk to Ander and receiving a cold silence in response, he took refuge in alcohol. It seemed that since then, these last days had been spent in a nebula, and he was only half aware of what was happening around him.

In his moments of lucidity, it was clear to Omar that alcohol abuse had led him to make decisions he regretted. He put his hands to his face and shook his head as if that were enough to erase his actions as if by magic. He walked into the living room and dropped onto the soft couch. He closed his eyes and relived what happened a little less than a week ago.

_Keith had gone to his apartment that Friday night to spend some time with him and try to convince him -once again- to go with them to the Hamptons for New Year's Eve. By the time Keith arrived with a pizza and a six-pack of beer in hand, Omar was already on his fourth glass of whiskey. They chatted for a while about mutual friends about the vacations, and finally, Ander came up in the conversation. It was at this point that things started to get out of control._

_He didn't know which one of them took the first step, but Omar could remember how good it felt when Keith put his arms around him and started kissing his neck, mumbling words of comfort, making him close his eyes and let things go. Nothing else mattered but to stop feeling that piercing pain from Ander's absence. When the caresses began to increase in intensity, a glimmer of resistance shouted at him to stop, but by then, it was too late to turn back._

_Omar could only remember that while he was fucking Keith, the image of Ander had crept into his mind. And that's how he started fantasizing; Keith stopped being Keith and became Ander. And during those minutes, it was Ander who kissed him and pressed him to his chest; it was Ander who spoke in his ear and moved against him until he finally cum._

_The problem was when it was all over, and his heart took up again the slow rhythm, and his brain a bit of common sense. Keith's gaze met his own, and he knew he was screwed. Omar was lying on the couch, and Keith was resting his head against his chest._

_"This time, it was different... I could feel it... couldn't you? -Keith had whispered against his skin._

_Although he felt somewhat dizzy, Omar was lucid enough to realize what had happened. "How could I tell him that it had been different because I had pretended that it was Ander and not him that I had fucked?_

_"It was." -He had lied._

_"Omar... I'm going to help you get through this."_

He breathed a sigh and stood up and made the memory disappear. Then, he looked at his watch and went to the bathroom; Omar undressed and let the water pressure massage his back. He had little over an hour to meet Ander, so he had to hurry if he wanted to get there before him.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

The effervescent bustle of the city was an almost exact reflection of his state of mind. As much as he tried to keep his emotions at bay, when it came to Omar, he couldn't restrain them. He touched the woolen cap once more and adjusted his scarf. He looked at his watch, only to find that it was still almost the same fifteen minutes away as the last time he had checked.

He shrugged and reached into his coat pocket until he found the pack of cigarettes he was looking for. He took one to his lips and lit it with a deep puff and then leaned against the metal railing. They had arranged to meet at Rockefeller Center in front of the Christmas tree, so while he smoked nervously, he looked randomly at the people skating on the ice rink below. As much as he tried not to think about it, he couldn't help but wonder what was in store for him that night.

He took a deep breath, and the characteristic smell of New York City assaulted his nostrils. It smelled like steel and hope. Omar used to make fun of him because Ander insisted that every city had a different smell. A unique and characteristic odor that he could remember by simply closing his eyes. _"For example... Madrid smells like fresh moss, wood and home"._ -He reflected, evoking the memory.

As if he had felt Omar's gaze, he turned his head, and in the distance, he saw him. Omar strolled, with his hands in his coat pockets and slightly stooped, but what attracted his attention was the warm smile on his face. When his eyes met, that smile widened, showing his teeth, telling him without words how happy he was to see him there. 

Ander smiled in turn and quickly put out what was left of the cigarette while trying to dampen the rapid heartbeat.

_-Ander..._ -Omar mumbled, stopping less than a meter away. He had only uttered his name, but from the way he watched him, Ander swore Omar would tell him what he was eager to hear.

_-Hey, how are you?_ -Ander asked, clearing his throat.

_-Now I'm fine._

_-What does that mean?_ -He wanted to know.

_-Can we talk about this later? Please?_ -Omar shrugged as he looked at him like a lost puppy.

_-Vale..._ -He forced himself to answer.

_-Hey, have you eaten yet?_

When Ander shook his head in denial, Omar signaled for him to follow him, while winking at him.

_-We can walk down forty-nine west to Seventh Avenue to try to get as close as we can to Times Square, and on the way, we could find someplace to eat, what do you think?_

A block later, Omar stopped in front of a hot dog stand on the sidewalk. The number of people on the streets was such that it would be difficult for them to find another place to eat.

_-It's not the fancy stuff, but I swear it's our best option._ -He heard Omar tell him as he shrugged.

_-What are you saying? I've always wanted to eat hot dogs at one of these places..._

Omar smiled and ordered two. They found a space to eat in the crowded street while they raffled off people passing by. For a few minutes, neither of them spoke, so Ander concentrated on his dinner. He didn't realize how hungry he was until he started eating.

_-I don't know if it's because I'm hungry, but I think these are the best hot dogs I've ever tried... -_ He exclaimed, putting the last piece of bread and sausage in his mouth.

The way Omar looked at him made him stop chewing for a moment, and then he swallowed the bite and asked:

_-What? What is it?_

Omar smiled at him and raised his thumb to touch the corner of his bottom lip. It was a quick movement, but it was enough to make him shake. 

_-You've mustard on the corner of your lip..._ -Omar muttered, as he cleaned Ander's lip and seconds later saw him put his finger in his mouth to suck it. _-Come on, are you ready? Let's go!_

Ander watched as Omar rolled up his napkin and threw it into the trash can next to him, and he took up the walk again.

_-Ander, let's go!_ -Omar urged him, taking him by the arm.

Ander nodded and let himself be dragged by Omar, feeling how every fiber of his body had responded to that innocent gesture. _"Jodeeer..."_ -He mentally cursed as he felt himself getting hard without being able to control himself.

When they arrived at the intersection of Broadway and Seventh Avenue, it was literally minutes before the countdown began and the famous ball of light fell announcing the arrival of the New Year. The atmosphere was vibrant, the crowd was screaming, and Ander could feel a contagious excitement as he watched the impressive fireworks. 

When they couldn't go any further because they were literally surrounded by thousands of people, Ander looked up and was mesmerized by the wonderful view around him; hundreds of lights, music, and happy people waiting for the arrival of the new year. 

When the countdown began, people were so euphoric he didn't realize that little by little, he and Omar started to walk away. It wasn't until he stopped feeling Omar's hand on his back that he looked away and saw him a couple of meters away. 

The crowd started chanting ten, nine, eight, seven... and every second that passed, he got further away from Omar. Omar was trying to make his way through the crowd to get to him, and Ander began to mimic him, struggling to get back to him. One second before _"Happy New Year"_ was heard; Omar reached out to grab him by the shoulder and felt Omar draw him strongly to him. 

_-I got you!_ -Omar whispered in his ear, without letting him go.

Ander clung to Omar's chest, as he wrapped both hands around him, feeling the warmth emanating from his body, while thousands of confetti flew over his head. Ander moved a few inches away from Omar to look him in the eye and what he saw made him smile. Omar looked at him like he hadn't in a long time, clinging to him like he never wanted to let go.

_-Happy New Year, nene!_ -Omar shouted at him to make himself heard above the crowd.

_-Happy New Ye...._ -And before Ander could finish the sentence, he felt Omar's arms around his shoulders, sinking his face into his neck and rubbing it with his lips. Seconds later, Omar's hands cupped both sides of his face, and closing the space between them, he disarmed him with a tender kiss.

Ander closed his eyes and had to hold on tightly to Omar's body because his knees threatened to stop holding him, while he responded to the kiss with the same intensity with which Omar kissed him. He felt a different set of emotions take hold of him, completely paralyzing him. He didn't know for sure if this was Omar's way of telling him that they would try again, but he wanted to believe it with all his might.

[ ](https://ibb.co/B6zwrCs)

*******


	26. I’ve got you under my skin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Contrary to what I thought, chapter 26 was ready a few days before, and this is because of you, my dear readers.  
> I want to thank each of you for taking the time not only to read but also to give me your feedback.  
> You all were my greatest inspiration. I never imagined that so many people were following this story, and that makes me very happy. I'm super grateful for that.  
> So I hope you enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.  
> xoxo ;)

*******

Ander clung to Omar's chest, as he wrapped both hands around him, feeling the warmth emanating from his body, while thousands of confetti flew over his head. Ander moved a few inches away from Omar to look him in the eye and what he saw made him smile. Omar looked at him like he hadn't in a long time, clinging to him like he never wanted to let go.

_-Happy New Year, nene!_ -Omar shouted at him to make himself heard above the crowd.

_-Happy New Ye...._ -And before Ander could finish the sentence, he felt Omar's arms around his shoulders, sinking his face into his neck and rubbing it with his lips. Seconds later, Omar's hands cupped both sides of his face, and closing the space between them, he disarmed him with a tender kiss.

Ander closed his eyes and had to hold on tightly to Omar's body because his knees threatened to stop holding him, while he responded to the kiss with the same intensity with which Omar kissed him. He felt a different set of emotions take hold of him, completely paralyzing him. He didn't know for sure if this was Omar's way of telling him that they would try again, but he wanted to believe it with all his might.

*******

**Chapter 26. I’ve got you under my skin**

**_(Ander)_ **

He ran his fingers in Omar's thick black hair while enjoying the warmth of his tongue, exploring every corner of his mouth gently, without the slightest care for what was going on around him. His body was shaking with desire, and he felt the hair on the back of his neck stand up, invaded by the urge to free himself, being barely aware of where they were. 

The way Omar kissed him had always seemed intoxicating and unique. Avid, intense, and possessive. As if with each kiss, Omar wanted to show him that he belonged to him.

_"Or was that what he wanted to believe? That they belonged to each other?"_

He had been with other guys before, but none of them had made him feel that way. Omar had such power over him that when he kissed him, he made Ander forget everything except the need to be in his arms. 

_"That's why your heart is in pieces..."_ -He heard the voice in his head again, but quickly pushed it aside to focus on the present.

When he nibbled on Omar's bottom lip and pulled it gently before running his tongue over his upper lip, Omar responded by pushing his hips against his own so he could feel how hard he was and leave no doubt about the effect Ander was having on him as well. He wanted so badly to feel the contact of that skin he loved so much, and his stomach contracted at the prospect of what was to come.

He stepped back for a few seconds to pull air and saw Omar breathing heavily as if he were about to lose control while holding him firmly at the waist. When he lost in the darkness of Omar's gaze, he wondered if he could ever love another man with the same intensity with which he loved Omar. 

_-Would you like to go to my place?_ -Omar's velvety voice sounded hoarse with desire, making his intentions clear. He cleared his throat and, while looking at him, he waited for his answer.

Being so close to each other and only until then, his senses registered a slight smell of alcohol. He hadn't noticed it before, but he couldn't help but wonder if Omar would behave the same way if he hadn't drunk. It was clear that he was not drunk, but for some reason, he didn't like discovering that.

_"I still have feelings for you, and the sex between us has always been amazing, but that doesn't mean we should be together. We can keep going like this... and see where it goes or..."_

Omar's words echoed in his brain as he watched him without saying a word.

_"Call me a coward if you want... but right now, I'm not sure I want to be in a relationship with you."_

_-Ander?_ -Omar insisted, bringing him back to the present.

_"Was it his imagination, or did he think he heard a note of anxiety in Omar's voice?_

He had to make a decision now. He could listen to that inner voice and decline his offer, no matter how tempting it was, or he could blow it all and walk away with him. Either way, his heart was already broken, and to be honest, after what they had talked about last time, nothing could be worse.

Usually, Ander wasn't superstitious, but after what happened the last time he was in Omar's apartment, the last thing he wanted to do was go back there and risk something similar happening, so he shook his head before responding.

_-My hotel is much closer._ \- He proposed, unable to refuse.

The key would be not to expect anything. To take what Omar had told him, he was willing to offer and not make the same mistake of talking to him about love or getting back together.

Omar's eyes softened as he listened, and arching his lips in a genuine smile, he muttered:

_-Okay... let's go there._

_"Who are you kidding? Since you agreed to celebrate New Year's with Omar, this is what you've been waiting for_. _"_ -He mocked as he made his way through the crowd with Omar hot on his heels.

*******

When they arrived at the hotel, both went straight to the elevator. Ander pressed the number seven and then leaned against the glass mirror as he watched Omar, who remained silent. Although they were now away from prying eyes, he did nothing to get close to him. 

Instead, Omar shortened the distance between them and, raising a hand, brushed his cheek with his thumb. It was such a gentle caress that he could have imagined it, but as soon as he felt Omar's rough fingers pressing against his jaw, he closed his eyes and moved his face in his direction, enjoying the contact.

The lights were off, but because the curtains were drawn completely, some light was leaking from the outside. Although somewhat muffled, it could still hear the voices of the people celebrating in the streets, completely unaware of what was about to happen inside that hotel room.

Ander gently closed the door and took off his coat. He walked to the bed to light one of the lamps that rested on the bedside table and turned to look at him. An uncomfortable silence hung over them. It seemed as if the desire that had consumed them a few minutes earlier had vanished as soon as they crossed the hotel threshold.

_-Do you have something to drink?_ -Omar asked, taking off his coat too and leaning against the wall.

Ander raised his eyebrow but said nothing; instead, he opened the small fridge embedded in the furniture under the TV screen and took out a beer.

Omar approached him, and when he grabbed it, his fingers brushed against Ander's, causing an electric current to run through his skin. He heard the click of the can as it opened and saw Omar drinking it as if it were water.

_-You were thirsty... weren't you?_ -He said ironically, grimacing.

Omar shrugged, in response and, leaving the empty can aside, approached him again. They were so close that with a slight nod, he could kiss him, but he held back. It seemed that they were both fighting a silent battle to see who would be the first to give in. Only seconds later, Omar took the initiative. He put both hands on the fabric of his shirt and, clenching his fists tightly, drew him towards him.

_-I missed you more than you could ever imagine_ -Omar muttered against his mouth, causing him to thrill.

_-Do you mean it?_ -A glimmer of hope crossed his mind.

Omar used his bewilderment to slip his tongue through his half-open lips. As he deepened the kiss, he felt Omar's hand go down his torso and start stroking his abdomen. When he found the belt buckle, he began to unbuckle it with nimble fingers until he opened his pants and slid his hand inside.

Ander groaned at the sensation of feeling his firm hand surrounding him and capturing him between his fingers. By then, the precum had already left a wet trace in his underwear, which made Omar playfully hummed when he noticed it. Without wasting any time, Omar ran his thumb over the tip, giving him an indescribable pleasure. He closed his eyes, enjoying the caresses that Omar lavished on him, but when he felt his hand go away, he forced himself to open his eyes again.

With his pupils dilated with pleasure, he saw Omar kneeling in front of him, to welcome him between his lips. The sight was so fucking hot that for a moment, he forced himself to take a deep breath, trying not to lose control. Ander took his hand to the back of Omar's head and, tangling his fingers in his hair, urged him to go a little deeper. With an expert movement, Omar sucked harder, looking up to look him in the eye, while swallowing him almost whole.

That was enough to make him almost cum, so he had to take a step back and muster all his strength to hold on. Omar's lips were wet and swollen, and he smiled at him with complicity. 

_Come here..._ -He asked him in a hoarse voice, grabbing his hips to capture him again between his lips. He passed his tongue through his cock to stop for a few seconds on the tip while whispering against his skin: - _Do you want to cum in my mouth, nene?_

Hearing this, Ander let out a groan, making his fingers cling tightly to Omar's hair, pulling it with a certain roughness. 

_-Omar... please_. -He pleaded.

**_(Omar)_ **

Having Ander begging him in that way was the best aphrodisiac that could exist, but he felt nervous for some reason that he couldn't explain. As if it was his first time with him, and although this was far from being true, deep down, he wanted to believe it. He wanted to take this opportunity and start over, leaving behind all his fears.

_-Is that a yes?_ -He muttered, tapping his tongue lightly on Ander's hard cock, causing him to let out a groan as he spread his legs a little further apart.

Taking advantage of that movement, Omar licked his index finger and guided it towards Ander's entrance while sliding his tongue to the base and then focusing his attention on his testicles. He put them in his mouth and began to move his tongue rhythmically as he moved his finger inside him.

_-Jodeeer! I can't take it anymore_. -Ander hissed. - _I need to fuck you now..._

As if on command, Omar released him and stood up. He also wanted to feel Ander inside him, so he took him by the hand and led him to the wide bed. There he straddled him and began to lick Ander's mouth. At once, Ander responded by kissing him urgently. Seemingly no one had enough since kisses became more and more intense; their tongues played caressing each other while they felt how Ander was gently nibbling their lips.

_-Do you have any lube?_ -He groaned against his mouth.

Ander nodded _. -In my suitcase..._ \- he whispered, making a gesture to stand up.

_-Don't move... I'll get it. Tell me where it is._

He found it where Ander had told him. In one of the side compartments was the tube of lube and a box of condoms. He took one out and took the lube and went back to the bed, where Ander was already waiting for him. Lying on his back, Omar watched how Ander follow every move he made as he massaged his cock. From that angle, Ander looked bigger than he remembered which made his stomach turn over in excitement.

This time, he wanted to do it differently, so he decided to go over to him and kneel on the mattress; he opened his legs and smeared a generous amount of the clear liquid on his entrance. 

_-Strawberry flavor with a retardant effect? Haha..._ -Omar read the label as he held the tube up to his nose. _-This is new..._ -He hummed funny, raising an eyebrow.

He saw Ander laugh a little uncomfortably, before muttering:

_-Shut up... It was the only thing I could find at the airport pharmacy._ -While he was talking, he wanted to stand up, but Omar wouldn't let him.

_-Stay there._ -He asked Ander in a hoarse voice, taking mental note of what he had just said. He saw that Ander was looking at him in confusion. They had never fucked in that position before, but what better than tonight to try something new. _"It was what I wanted, wasn't it? To start over..."_

He wanted to sit on Ander; he wanted to ride him until he had no strength left. So once he finished getting ready and felt sufficiently lubricated, he straddled him. He took Ander's cock and after sliding the condom on him, he leaned on one leg to help himself with his hand and guide him inside.

The pressure of Ander's thick cock as it slowly slid into him made Omar clench his teeth and hold his breath. When he was completely inside, he sat on Ander but didn't move. He had apparently not used enough lubricant as he realized he needed a moment to get used to his size.

**_(Ander / Omar)_ **

Omar has never done anything like this before. They had fucked in many different positions, but as incredible as it seemed, never like this. As Ander watched him smile, Omar's lips parted, and his cheeks blushing, he couldn't help but wonder if this would be now his new favorite position. The image of Keith fucking Omar like that suddenly struck him, and he had to make a big effort to push aside the wave of jealousy that invaded him. 

_-Are you okay?_ -He forced himself to ask when he saw that Omar was not moving.

Omar nodded. He was overwhelmed by this closeness and by the emotions that took hold of him at that moment. Because being with Ander would always go far beyond fucking. He wanted to give himself to him completely; body and soul. He wanted him to know how much he had missed him and how much he needed him. Compared to Ander, Keith, or any other guy he'd been with, it came down to nothing.

Ander was big, so it took a moment for him to adjust. He lifted his hips and then came down again. He repeated that movement several more times with his hands resting on Ander's abdomen, without letting all his weight fall on him.

The sensations that Ander was experiencing were about to drive him crazy; he needed Omar to move; he needed to feel him even more. Unable to hold himself back for one more second, he grabbed Omar by the arms and sat up to be leaned against the head of the bed while lifting his hips to deepen the penetration.

A gasp escaped Omar's lips, and immediately he wrapped his arms around Ander's neck to bring him closer. The two kissed passionately, and little by little, Omar began to set a much deeper and faster pace as the two became better matched. 

Facing each other, Ander was delighted to look at Omar. Those gestures transformed by passion, and the sounds that escaped from both were confused with each other. With one hand, he held onto Omar's back, while with the other, he began to jerk him, causing Omar to melt in his arms. This forced Omar to slow down to such an extent that he could open his eyes and lose himself in Ander's gaze. 

_-Look..._ -Ander mumbled in a choppy voice while pointing his head to the side.

When Omar followed his gaze, he was surprised to find the reflection of both of them. He hadn't noticed that there was a full-length mirror on one of the walls of the room. It was so horny to see himself climb up and down on Ander's body as Ander held him tightly, that he fucked him until the pleasure was too much; until his body shook and trembled, but it seemed that it would never be enough to feel satiated by him.

Ander knew he wouldn't last much longer. Having Omar like that, holding him in his arms and burying himself deeper and deeper inside him, was enough to feel his body release. When Omar began to move faster and faster and slipped his tongue down his neck, it was his downfall. He uttered one last gasp and began to cum inside Omar. It was a sublime sensation to watch them fuck through the mirror. The love he felt for Omar at that moment was indescribable. A connection like he had rarely experienced before. He grabbed Omar's cock and jerked him off faster, and seconds later, Omar cum on top of him.

_-Jodeeer nene!_ -Omar shouted, closing his eyes and throwing his head back, when the first spurt of sperm shot out between them, falling on Ander's abdomen and chest. 

Omar was shaking as he dropped onto Ander. He didn't know if it was due to the effort or the intensity of the orgasm he had just experienced, but it was a wonderful feeling. Their bodies were sticky with sweat and semen, but it seemed that Ander didn't care at all, as he held him as if he never wanted to let go. As he rested his head on Ander's chest, he could hear his heart racing. He raised his head a little to look at him and smiled at him. Ander smiled back and cradled his face with both hands and slowly kissed him.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig_

_"I'm screwed... Because I can't imagine life without you..."_ -Ander thought, as he kept kissing him.

_-Ander..._ -Omar mused once they parted to get some air.

_-Yeah?_ -Ander asked cautiously, feeling an alarm vibrate in his chest. 

_-There is something I'd like to tell you..._

_"Please... don't do it. Don't spoil this moment"_ -Ander thought before looking at him again.

*******


	27. Confessions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Chapter 27 is ready! Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
> 
> ***  
> Warning: This chapter contains allusions to self-damage. If this may cause you anxiety or is a trigger for you, I apologize for it, and please do not hesitate to skip it.  
> ***

*******

Omar was shaking as he dropped onto Ander. He didn't know if it was due to the effort or the intensity of the orgasm he had just experienced, but it was a wonderful feeling. Their bodies were sticky with sweat and semen, but it seemed that Ander didn't care at all, as he held him as if he never wanted to let go. As he rested his head on Ander's chest, he could hear his heart racing. He raised his head a little to look at him and smiled at him. Ander smiled back and cradled his face with both hands and slowly kissed him.

_"I'm screwed... Because I can't imagine life without you..."_ -Ander thought, as he kept kissing him.

_-Ander..._ -Omar mused once they parted to get some air.

_-Yeah?_ -Ander asked cautiously, feeling an alarm vibrate in his chest. 

_-There is something I'd like to tell you..._

_"Please... don't do it. Don't spoil this moment,"_ -Ander thought before looking at him again.

*******

**Chapter 27. Confessions**

**_(Ander)_ **

He knew him so well that he knew when Omar was nervous, he had a habit of biting his nails, or failing that, his bottom lip. So when he saw him do the latter while looking away, he knew that whatever Omar wanted to say to him, he didn't want to know. At least not at that moment when he could still feel the weight of Omar's body resting on his; when he could still feel the weakness in his extremities due to the very intense orgasm he had just experienced.

_"He'll probably tell me the same thing... that he doesn't want to be in a relationship with me. But then why is it that every time we're together, I feel like it's not just sex for him?"_ -Ander reasoned, as he watched him.

_-Ander... I... -Omar hesitated._

_-What do you say if we get clean?_ -He interrupted, sitting up on the bed as he tried to suppress the fear that began to take hold of him. _-We're all sticky, so a shower would be nice. We can talk later if you want._ -He tried to sound casual as he stood up.

Omar looked at him for so long that Ander thought he would get dressed and leave without saying a word. However, he nodded, and getting out of bed, he saw him heading for the bathroom. Ander stood still until he heard the water spurt. It didn't sound like the shower, it sounded like Omar was filling the tub, and for a moment, he didn't know what he was supposed to do. 

A few minutes later, Omar peeked out leaning against the door frame, and asked, raising an eyebrow.

_-So, are you coming or...?_

_-Yes... I'm coming._ -He managed to answer. 

_-Vale..._ -He nodded, going back inside.

Omar was already sitting inside the huge hot tub when Ander entered the bathroom, and the excess foam was covering him up to shoulder height. His eyes were closed, and his head was resting against the headboard. 

Ander was silent and stood there admiring him. Omar's face was perfect; his bushy eyebrows, his straight nose, his lips were full... In a matter of seconds, he felt his body begin to react without him being able to do anything about it.

As if Omar had felt his presence, he opened his eyes and looked at him. First to his eyes and then he looked down at his naked body until he stopped at his cock, which by then was slightly harder. 

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Ander saw him pass his tongue over his lips before smiling broadly, and tilting his head, he said in a low voice:

_-If you stand there for another minute, you will freeze. Come on, get in, tío. The water is great._ -As he said this, he opened his arms and waved for him to join him.

_-When I said we should clean up, I meant a shower... I didn't think you'd want to get in the tub._ -He muttered, putting one foot in and then sitting down in front of him.

_-No, not like that._ -Omar complained _. -Didn't you ever watch Pretty Woman, or what?_ -He urged him to come closer as he smiled at him.

_-Joder... Estás loco!_ -He complained, but in the end, he obeyed by sliding into the water to get into the space between his legs.

_-Shhh... You shut up and enjoy yourself. It's not every day you get a chance to relax in a bathtub._ -concluded Omar, playing with the foam.

As Omar had assured him, the water temperature was perfect, but as Omar looked relaxed, he felt increasingly tense. All he could think about was what Omar would say to him once they got out of there, and how this bubble of happiness he was in would soon disappear. As he thought about it, he felt Omar's arms wrap around his torso to draw him to his chest.

_Come here..._ -He whispered in his ear. _-Let me bathe you._

Ander put his head between Omar's chest and shoulder and stretched his legs along the length of the huge tub while resting his arms on Omar's thighs. Slowly he began to relax, and when he felt Omar's hands wipe from his torso to his lower abdomen with a sponge bath, he closed his eyes and let himself be pampered.

For several minutes, neither of them spoke. Ander just wanted to concentrate on the pleasant sensations he was experiencing under Omar's soft touch. He felt the sponge pass over his body again and again at a slow pace, and all he wanted was for this moment to last forever.

Omar's words made him open his eyes.

_-Do you know that I always dreamed of having a bathtub like this at home as a child? Of course, it was a luxury we couldn't afford..._ -Omar explained with a hint of nostalgia in his voice.

_-Really?_ -He asked without turning around.

_-Yes, although we did have a kind of small, plastic tub. My mother used it to wash some things, and when she didn't notice, I would take it out and fill it with water to bathe in._

_-It must have been fun, right? How old were you?_

_-I don't know... maybe seven or eight._ And yes, it was almost always fun, except for the last time...

_-The last time?_ -he asked, intrigued.

_-At about that age, I knew I was different from the rest of the kids. The girls didn't catch my eye as the boys did..._

_-Do you really remember when you found out you were into guys? I don't remember exactly..._ -He was sincere.

_-Believe me, I'm well aware of it..._ -He muttered in a tone that seemed strange to Ander. And almost immediately, he continued talking.

_-On one occasion, Nadia and I stole some lipstick from May, and I asked her to paint my lips. I wore one of her dresses and a pink hijab... ha!_ -Omar laughed bitterly at the memory.

_-I remember feeling so happy... I danced and jumped around the room, looking at myself in the mirror until Baba came._

Ander remained silent, listening to him. And as he did so, he began absently massaging Omar's thighs under the water.

_-I'll never forget the look in his eyes... you know? Or the words and the punches that followed..._ -By then, Omar's voice was almost a whisper.

_-What are you saying, Omar?_ -he asked in astonishment, turning around to look him in the eye.

_-I had never told anyone before._ -He looked away for a moment, but then he looked into his eyes. _-I don't know, maybe I thought that if I didn't say it, it would be as if it never happened... That night I remember I went into that tub and submerged myself in the water, trying to make the pain in my body disappear, thinking that if I stopped breathing, I wouldn't have bad thoughts anymore and so Baba wouldn't be angry with me anymore... But I couldn't do it..._

Omar's face showed such deep sadness that he was frozen by what Omar was confessing to him for a second. His eyes were glazed over with that memory, and a tear ran down his cheek, but he quickly ran a hand over his eyes and smiled sadly.

Ander couldn't stop crying. They were silent tears that were confused with the water, and the only thing he could do was hold him tightly, trying to make him feel that everything was okay now. He wished with all his soul to be able to take away that painful memory. No one deserved such a thing.

_-Jodeeer, Omar! You should never have gone through that... Your father... Your father is an asshole._ -He whispered, very close to his ear, as he ran his hand through Omar's hair.

He felt Omar pull on the air before he got rid of his hug. He looked him in the eyes and pouted. Then he wiped away the tears that, by then, were running freely down his cheeks, and shrugging, he mumbled:

_-I don't hold a grudge against him. Really, Ander. I understand that this is how my father was brought up and that he didn't know how to handle it at the time. But now everything is different. He has changed and accepts me as I am._

Ander looked at him but said nothing more. Just imagining that little boy that Omar once was and all the horrible things he had to endure without anyone's support caused a fury as he had never experienced before, take over. He took a deep breath and, approaching Omar gave him a soft kiss on the temple. Seconds later, he stood up and offered his hand to help him up.

_-Come on, let's get out of here; the water is already cold_. 

He gave him a towel and took another one for himself. He wrapped it around his waist, and they both left the bathroom in silence. He lent him a clean T-shirt, and after he put on another one, they both went to bed. Ander needed to hug him like never before; he wanted to protect him from the ghosts of his past. So when Omar rested his head against his chest, he wrapped one arm around his waist and pulled him a little closer.

After Omar's confession, the two of them remained silent. There was no tension between them; they were just two guys who knew each other today more than yesterday, and who didn't need to have a conversation to enjoy each other's company.

That was one of the things he missed most from when they were a couple—that complicity of telling each other, without words, what they felt when they were together. And after everything that had happened that night, it seemed like they had reconnected. He just wished he wasn't wrong.

_-What time is it?_ -He heard him ask after a while.

_-Mmm... I don't know, but it's late..._

Omar stood up to take the cell phone he had left on the bedside table and settled down again next to him.

_-It's three in the morning... but I'm not sleepy at all_. -He muttered, checking the time.

_-Come on, let's try to get some sleep..._ -He spooned him and interlacing his hand with Omar's as he used to do when they were together.

About ten minutes later, Ander was still awake. His mind was a whirlwind of emotions, and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get out of his head what Omar had confessed to him. He knew that Omar was awake too, so his whole body tensed up when he heard him speak.

_-Ander..._

_-Mmm?_ -He hummed. His lips stuck to the back of Omar's neck.

_-I'm sorry about the way things went the last time we were together. The way you left..._

_-Lately, things have been complicated between us..._ -He whispered in reply.

_-Do you know that when I called you, and you didn't pick up the phone, I thought you'd had enough and were definitely ignoring me?_

_-I could never get sick of you, Omar._

_-You don't know that, Ander._ -He replied with a kind of snort.

_-Omar, listen..._

_-No, let me talk, please. This is what I've wanted to talk to you about for a while._

Although he was afraid of what Omar would say, he let out a sigh and was silent, encouraging him to continue.

_-When you decided to end what we had and start a relationship with another guy without telling me, you hurt me in a way you couldn't even imagine. That's why I told you that I didn't want to go back with you because I couldn't stand a disappointment like that again..._

_-Omar, that's not going to happen... I swear._ -He interrupted him without being able to avoid it.

_-But when I thought you wouldn't come back, an irrational fear took hold of me thinking I would never see you again..._ -Omar turned to face him even though they couldn't see each other.

Ander stretched out his hand and turned on the light on the bedside table. He needed to look him in the eye and tell him that he would never intentionally hurt him again. He needed him to know how important he was to him.

- _I love you, Omar._

Omar looked at him for several seconds before speaking.

_-I believe you. And I want to believe you when you say it's not going to happen again, but..._

_-There are no buts, Omar._

_-Ander, listen to me ... what I want to ask you is if you would be willing to go one step at a time._

_-What do you mean?_

_-Now that we'll be living in the same city again, we can see each other more often. We can realize if we really want to be in a relationship. See if... it can work._

_-What happens?_ -He questioned him, feeling confused. - _Is it that you are no longer sure how you feel about me? Or do you have feelings for someone else?_ -He didn't want to say Keith's name, but they both knew who he was referring to.

_-We've both changed, Ander. We're not the same sixteen-year-old kids who thought nothing could ever keep them apart._

Ander ran his hands through his face and rubbed his eyelids. He didn't agree with what Omar thought, but he didn't want to pressure him into doing something he didn't feel safe about either.

_-Ander... look at me._ -Omar asked, grabbing him by the chin. 

Ander did so, holding his breath as he listened to him.

_-If I weren't sure how I felt about you, I wouldn't have called you. I wouldn't even be here now. I'm just asking you to let time settle things. If it's true that what we feel for each other is still intact, and not just the illusion of what we once were, we will find our way back. But if not, we won't hurt each other unnecessarily._

_-I see... And how are we supposed to know that, according to you?_

_-Well... hanging out, seeing each other... spending time with other people, I guess... You'll meet people now and make a new life here... What if in time you discover that you don't feel as good by my side as you used to?_

- _Yes, of course... And what if the world ends tomorrow?_ -He scoffed _. -Don't you think you're overthinking about all that could happen?_

_-Please do this for me._

Ander kept silent, weighing the situation. He would prove him wrong because he had no doubt that Omar was the person he wanted to be with. And if he had to make that to get him to trust him again, then he would do it gladly.

_-Okay... let's take it one step at a time._ -He muttered.

He didn't know at what point the dream overcame them, but for the first time in a long time, with Omar in his arms, he fell asleep feeling hopeful. 

*******


	28. Are you gonna let me down?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> Chapter 28 is here. Hope you like it!  
> As always, I wanna thank you for your comments and/or kudos!  
> xoxo 😗

*******

_-If I weren't sure how I felt about you, I wouldn't have called you. I wouldn't even be here now. I'm just asking you to let time settle things. If it's true that what we feel for each other is still intact, and not just the illusion of what we once were, we will find our way back. But if not, we won't hurt each other unnecessarily._

_-I see... And how are we supposed to know that, according to you?_

_-Well... hanging out, seeing each other... spending time with other people, I guess... You'll meet people now and make a new life here... What if in time you discover that you don't feel as good by my side as you used to?_

- _Yes, of course... And what if the world ends tomorrow?_ -He scoffed _. -Don't you think you're overthinking about all that could happen?_

_-Please do this for me._

Ander kept silent, weighing the situation. He would prove him wrong because he had no doubt that Omar was the person he wanted to be with. And if he had to make that to get him to trust him again, then he would do it gladly.

_-Okay... let's take it one step at a time._ -He muttered.

He didn't know at what point the dream overcame them, but for the first time in a long time, with Omar in his arms, he fell asleep feeling hopeful. 

*******

**Chapter 28.** **Are you gonna let me down?**

**_(Omar)_ **

He slowly woke up, feeling somewhat confused. He opened his eyes, and the first thing he saw were those lovely curls he had missed so much just a few inches away from his face. The memories of the previous night came to him as if in fast motion, making him feel complete. His body was slightly painful because of the passionate night they had shared, but curiously, it was a pleasant pain. A familiar sensation he had missed these past few weeks, a sweet reminder of what it meant to make love to Ander.

The second thing he noticed was that he was in such a comfortable position with Ander in his arms that he didn't want to move. He was at the limit between the superficial sleep and consciousness, so little by little, his senses began to awaken. The bed felt like a fluffy cloud, and the blanket which covered them was so cozy that he decided to close his eyes for a few more minutes to enjoy that special moment.

They were lying on their sides; Ander had his back to him, and Omar had him cradled in his arms. As he pressed himself more tightly against Ander, he thought it was amazing how their bodies harmonized with each other, as if they were the last two pieces of a puzzle fitting perfectly. 

When they were dating, Omar had a habit of looking for Ander in the middle of the night to spoon him, and invariably, he tended to caress first for his butt and then for his cock. He didn't know why, but knowing that only he could touch him like that, whenever he wanted to, helped him fall asleep more easily.

Ander had teased him the first few times because Omar didn't do anything but petting him until he fell asleep. But as time went by, it became a peculiar habit for both of them. Something like a tacit agreement between them, and if for some reason Omar didn't hug him he could hear Ander's voice asking him in a whisper.

_"Could you hug me?"_ -He used to say. And of course, Ander didn't need to ask him twice, for him to do it willingly.

It was a custom he had acquired over time, and apparently, he had unconsciously done so again in the course of that night. A huge grin was drawn on his face when he felt Ander's cock begin to awake, getting hard under his hand. That made his own body respond to that reaction, and the only thing he could do was stick even more against him.

Having opened his heart to him by confessing some of his fears and how he felt about their relationship made him feel a little more secure. And he couldn't have been happier to know that Ander had agreed to go one step at a time.

_-Mmm… Morning. It seems that you’ve already woken up…_ -He mumbled against his nape.

Ander turned around to face him. After a couple of blinks, he was finally able to focus on him. His eyelids were slightly swollen from sleeping, and a perennial smile was installed on his face.

_-What can I do to make you wake me up like this every day?_ -He muttered in a hoarse voice.

He didn't know if Ander's voice sounded like that because he had just woken up or was it due to his skillful caresses. But the tug he felt in his stomach when he understood his words' meaning made him stop for a moment. He didn't believe that Ander meant it, but he couldn’t help imagining what it would be like if they really decided to start a life together.

Before he could reply, Ander approached him and began to peck at his lips. Soon, those chaste kisses grew in intensity as the seconds passed, and there was no way either of them could contain themselves. Ander traced a series of kisses along the jawline until he stopped at the neck.

Omar couldn't help but laugh because Ander tickled him as he whispered how much he had missed him, but when he felt his teeth creep across his skin, the laughter turned into a series of gasps. In an instant, Ander stripped him of his shirt and continued to run down his torso with wet kisses. Omar looked at him without missing any detail, memorizing that moment forever.

*******

Twenty minutes later, they were both breathing at the same rhythm, as if their heartbeats were linked into one. Ander had let himself fall upon him, resting his head on his chest, and as Omar rubbed his hand along Ander's back, gently and slowly, he knew that he would never be tired of making love to Ander.

_-I think that strawberry lube will become my favorite..._ -He joked, looking at the ceiling.

_-I'm taking note..._ -Ander laughed, following his joke.

Ander's stomach began to growl, reminding Omar that it had been more than twelve hours since they had last eaten. It was past noon, and as appealing as the idea of staying in his arms was, his own stomach began to protest as well.

_-Nothing would please me more than to fool around in bed all day, but I'm starving. You've heard my belly, haven't you?_ -Ander complained, taking one hand to his flat abdomen, grimacing. _-Do you want to go out and get something to eat?_

_-Mmm... I don't know._

_-Do you have plans today?_ -Ander asked quietly.

_-January the 1st? Are you kidding?_ -Omar reassured him. _-On second thought, I just had an idea. How about ordering room service? We could eat in bed and then, like you said, stay here frolicking all day..._

Ander visibly relaxed as he listened to him, and kissing him on the temple, urged him to get up.

_-Okay... Let's check the menu._ -He pointed to the furniture in front of the bed. 

When the room bell rang, signaling that the food had arrived, Ander jumped to his feet. Omar saw him putting on the T-shirt he had borrowed him the night before, and the boxers that were scattered on the floor, next to the bed, so Omar took the T-shirt Ander had worn by sliding it over his head.

_-Stay here, I'll get it. -_ Ander told him before deepening the kiss.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_from @piper_ayuso Ig account_

They sat down at a small table in the corner of the room; they had ordered burgers and fries and were eating quietly. Omar watched as Ander chewed a potato chip lazily into his mouth as he watched absentmindedly through the window. They ate in silence, and sometimes, when their eyes met, Omar thought he saw a mixture of illusion and uncertainty in Ander's gaze.

_-What are you thinking?_ -Omar couldn't help but ask after a while.

Ander looked at him for several seconds before answering.

-You don't wanna know. -He laughed nervously.

_-C'mon! tío! Tell me..._

_-Do you really wanna know?_

_-I do!_

He saw Ander look out of the window again, and after a few seconds, he blew the air contained in his lungs and mumbled:

_-I'll tell you some other time, okay?_

Omar didn't insist. He just squinted, thinking about the reason why Ander didn't want to tell him.

Soon after, he saw him pull the cotton shirt he was wearing closer to his nose, and then close his eyes and smile. He looked so fucking handsome… with that slightly messy hair and lighter eyes because the sun that filtered through the window caressed his face.

_-What are you doing?_ -Omar asked curiously.

_-My shirt smells like you._ -He muttered, smiling.

_-What are you talking about, tío! You have a fixation on smells, you know that?_

Ander looked at him for a moment, as if he were pondering whether or not to share what he thought. Finally, he mumbled:

_-You smell of autumn and fresh rain._

Omar's heart turned as he listened to him. He wasn't used to Ander behaving that way, or saying those kinds of things, because he usually kept everything he thought to himself. So he wasn't sure if it were the words themselves, the way Ander watched him as he said them, or the way his smile broadened as if he was the best thing that ever happened to him, but at that moment, Omar knew he was fooling himself. 

The idea of going slowly now seemed absurd and risky to him. Suddenly, the idea of Ander meeting other guys now seemed like a tangible threat to him. He knew he didn't want to risk losing him again because he was lost and hopelessly in love with him. 

Of course, he said nothing. 

Instead, he stood up and offered Ander his hand to stand up. He put his arms around Ander's waist and rested his face on his shoulder without being able to get rid of that annoying thought that was clouding his mind. He felt Ander's head move and noticed the warmth of his lips resting on his temple.

They spent the rest of the afternoon lying in bed, fucking, sleeping, talking, and fucking again.

During those long chats, Omar found out how Ander had made up with his father again, and that he had been training him to get back into the game to get the scholarship; that almost every weekend, he met with Guzmán and Nadia, and Marina was his favorite. He also told him about Azucena, reminding him how much that woman had helped him when Baba kicked out of his home.

When Omar woke up, this time in Ander's arms, the sun had already set, and it had started to snow. Omar could hear Ander's even breathing against his neck, a sign that he was still sleeping peacefully. Careful not to wake him up, he freed himself from his embrace and turned to look at him from the front. His lips were partially open, and he was snoring softly. For a long time, he did nothing but watch him and smile like a fool.

Ander was beautiful in many ways, not just physically. While he could pass for a magazine model, many other features about him made him special in Omar's eyes. He remembered the strength with which he faced his illness even though he had lost the friendship of his two best friends. 

And in his own way, Ander had tried to protect him from carrying that heavy burden, and now that he looked back on it, he understood it a little better. And although Ander wanted to show himself as a tough guy, when he let Omar see that vulnerability, it warmed Omar's heart.

Omar let him sleep even though what he wanted the most was to wake him up to kisses. He closed his eyes and remembered the last twenty-four hours. Omar couldn't forget the feeling he experienced, waking up in Ander's arms after so long. The warm intimacy of his embrace, the sensation of his naked and hard body pressed against him, the almost protective way in which his arms held him. 

Something inside him became shaken, feelings that he thought he had buried. Feelings he didn't know how to handle. He wanted to do it; he really wanted to trust him again. He wanted to let go and jump off the cliff, knowing that Ander would be there to catch him, but he didn't trust him enough.

Ander's arm moved, looking for him in his sleep, and when he found him, he pressed him against his body as if he were claiming him as his own. Omar looked at Ander's long, strong fingers and remembered what those fingers were capable of making him feel. He let out a deep sigh and taking his cell phone he opened _Tik Tok._

For a while, he was wasting his time watching all kinds of videos until he saw one in particular that caught his attention. In it, a girl was showing how people could hear their heartbeat by recording with the cellphone. It was as simple as starting to record from the app and bringing the mobile's microphone closer to the chest. And seconds later, people could hear them so loud and clear that it seemed unreal.

He pressed the icon to start recording and took his mobile to Ander's chest, still sound asleep. He placed it close to his heart and waited for several seconds. When he played the video to see if the experiment had worked, he couldn't help but smile. Not only could Ander's heartbeat be heard, but his face could be seen sleeping peacefully. He saved it and closed the app. He longed for Ander to wake up and show him his discovery.

The next hour he spent browsing on _Instagram_ ; commenting on his friends' posts and liking the pics that he found most endearing. He had fun watching Lu celebrating New Year's with Valerio somewhere in Europe; Carla and Samu uploaded a post of the two of them together in what seemed to be the Swiss Alps; another post of Nadia with Marina, their parents, and Guzman in their small apartment in Madrid, made him feel melancholy. He missed his family and friends so much that he silently thanked Ander for being by his side.

He was about to close the app when he saw the notification that Keith had posted a new story. He clicked on it, and Keith's image popped up all over his cell phone screen. It was a selfie with perfect lighting taken from very close, so it made Keith's eyes look even bluer. The ear-piercing reminded him that when he met him, he thought he looked a bit like Ander.

Omar left his fingertip on the screen to prevent it from changing the pic to the next story, and he watched Keith's pic. No one could deny that Keith was an attractive guy; the contrast of the dark eyebrows and curls with those expressive blue eyes made people look twice at him on the street. And although Omar was very fond of him, he could never fall in love with him. He smiled and let out a sigh.

- _That's your friend, isn't it?_

_-Jodeeer! -You scared the shit out of me!_

Ander's voice caught him by surprise, making him drop his cellphone on the bed. Due to his sharp voice and hard look, Omar knew that the conversation they would have wouldn't be precisely pleasant. He had been so engrossed in looking at the story that he overlooked that Ander had been awake for quite a while. 

_"Was there a mixture of jealousy and disappointment in his voice?”_ -Omar thought, keeping silent because what he saw in Ander's eyes scared him. He felt like a little boy who had been caught doing something bad, and apparently, Ander was thinking just that. 

_-Ander..._ -He cleared his throat and continued. _-Hey, it's not what you think._

_"Why did he feel the urgent need to justify himself?_

Ander raised his eyebrows in disbelief as he let out a bitter laugh.

_-And according to you, what am I thinking, Omar?_

*******


	29. Lay your cards on the table

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 29 is ready, enjoy!  
> xoxo

*******

Ander's voice caught him by surprise, making him drop his cellphone on the bed. Due to his sharp voice and hard look, Omar knew that the conversation they would have wouldn't be precisely pleasant. He had been so engrossed in looking at the story that he overlooked that Ander had been awake for quite a while. 

_"Was there a mixture of jealousy and disappointment in his voice?”_ -Omar thought, keeping silent because what he saw in Ander's eyes scared him. He felt like a little boy who had been caught doing something wrong, and apparently, Ander was thinking just that. 

_-Ander..._ -He cleared his throat and continued. _-Hey, it's not what you think._

_"Why did he feel the urgent need to justify himself?_

Ander raised his eyebrows in disbelief as he let out a bitter laugh.

_-And according to you, what am I thinking, Omar?_

*******

**Chapter 29.** **Lay your cards on the table**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_A few minutes earlier_

When he opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Omar leaning against the head of the bed, holding his cell phone. From the position Ander was in, he could see the mobile screen showing Omar's family's pic on Instagram. He saw him pursing his lips and noticed how his eyes were slightly moistened, without him being able to hide the nostalgia of being away from his own. 

Ander was about to hug him to let him know that although his family was away, he was there for him, but the next second, Omar clicked on a story, and immediately Keith’s image popped up on the screen. 

Seeing Omar's face light up with a smile, followed by a long sigh, made him stop short. In a matter of seconds, a mixture of unpleasant emotions took hold of him. He didn't know what feeling prevailed at that moment, whether it was the almost sickening jealousy he experienced or the piercing pain in his chest when he confirmed that Omar had feelings for that guy.

Not being able to contain himself, he muttered:

_-That's your friend, isn't it?_

What happened next only confirmed that he wasn't wrong. Nervous was a subtle way to describe Omar's reaction. He saw him toss his cell phone while hissing a curse, only to look at him seconds later with his eyes open like plates and a blush that stained his cheeks.

_-Ander... Hey, it's not what you think_.

If Omar was trying to reassure him, his words had the opposite effect. He could only let out a bitter laugh as he held his gaze. Omar had no fucking clue of the avalanche of questions that were stuck in his throat, threatening to make him lose what little self-control he had left.

_-And according to you, what am I thinking, Omar_? -He hissed.

He saw Omar look down in silence. At that moment, he knew he couldn't do this. Not like this. Not when there was a chance that any random day Omar would decide that Keith was a better option. Because if that were to happen, Ander had no idea how he would overcome it.

Omar couldn't hide his nervousness, and when he saw him biting his nails without saying another word, his patience reached its limit. Ander ran both hands to his face and got out of bed to start dressing. 

He didn't know what to do. _"How could it be that from one second to the next, everything went to shit again?"_ It seemed as if fate was screaming in his face that all his efforts were futile and that he could not fight the obvious.

He wanted to confront him, he wanted to scream in his face that he was a thousand times better than that guy... that he was sure no one could love him the way he did... he wanted... he wanted to hear Omar telling him that he had nothing to worry about, that he loved him and that Keith meant nothing to him. But none of that happened. 

It wasn't until he was almost fully dressed that he heard him speak.

_-What are you doing? Why are you dressing? Ander?_ -Omar stood up and walked over to him.

_-Look, forget it..._ -He muffled. 

_-No, I don't want to. I don't want you to get any wrong ideas. I've seen the way you looked at me._

_-Tell me something; when you told me you wanted to spend time with other people, did you do it thinking about that guy?_

_-No... That’s not why I said it._ -He answered emphatically. _-Look, Ander, I'm not gonna lie to you… Keith is someone important in my life, but I'm not in love with him._

_-I see..._ -He tried in vain to keep Omar from realizing that with every second that passed, he became more and more jealous; hearing once again that this asshole was someone special for him only made him feel sick.

- _You're not in love with him, but you fuck him, don't you?_

_-Ander... please. Don't do this._

_-Do what? A scene?_ -He asked angrily.

And before Omar could answer, he continued talking.

_-It doesn't matter. You've already answered me anyway..._ -He said in a bitter tone.

He took his coat and headed to the door, but Omar was quicker and got in the way.

_-Ander, what are you doing? Where are you going?_

_-Let me through, Omar; I want to be alone. We can talk about it later..._

_-No, we need to talk now._

_-Leave me alone, vale?_

_-Ander! I don't want you to go... Not like this. Besides, if there's anyone who should leave, it's me. This is your room._

Ander nodded, curling his lips down into a grimace.

_-You can leave whenever you want._

*******

_(Omar)_

Powerless, Omar watched the fragile bond they had begun to build go to shit, and that terrified him. He needed to stop Ander from leaving, so without thinking about his words, he grabbed him by the shoulder, trying to hold him, and almost screamed:

_-I'm not fucking him!_

Ander stopped, still with his hand on the door handle, and turned towards him. He saw hesitation in his gaze, disbelief, as he watched him for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, he pulled his arm with some abruptness to break free from Omar's grip and left without saying a word.

Omar looked around; the trays with the food scraps, the bed with the scrambled sheets, and the tube of lube on the side table. He couldn't believe the turn the night had taken in a fucking instant.

He dropped against the wall, and, hugging his legs, he put his chin back on his knees. He couldn't stop thinking about the last words he had said to Ander. Technically, he had not lied. Or rather, that was what he wanted to convince himself of. Yes, he had fucked Keith a few days ago, but Ander didn't have to know that because besides, it was something that wouldn't happen again.

He didn't know that he drove him to do it, but while he was getting dressed, he took the T-shirt that Ander had worn the night before and put it on top of his. It had been an hour since Ander had left, and after what he had told him, he didn't want him to find him there. He didn't know if he would be able to lie to him again, in case Ander asked him about Keith once again. So, taking one last look, he closed the door gently behind him.

The female voice coming out of the loudspeaker indicating that the train was arriving _at York St. Station_ , in conjunction with the sound of the sliding doors opening, made him react. He quickly got up from his seat and walked out onto the platform a few seconds before the train doors closed again. When he left the subway station, the icy wind hit his face, but he didn't care. He just adjusted his coat a little more and started walking at a slow pace. It had stopped snowing.

He was in no hurry to get home because he knew no one was waiting for him anyway. He looked at his cell phone once more, only to sadly find that he had no message from Ander, and at that moment, an idea crossed his mind. Instead of turning right onto _Washington St_. and going straight to his flat, he turned in the opposite direction onto _Prospect St_. feeling the knot in his stomach get even tighter.

Ten minutes later, the Brooklyn Bridge stood before him. That place would always have a special meaning, at least for him. On that bridge several years ago, the dreams of two young guys started. A lock with their initials attached to one of the steel beams as a symbol of their love. He began to walk a little faster, with a unique goal. He needed to see that lock again, which was probably stupid, but he needed to know that it was still there, firm as the first day, so that he could hold on to something real. 

He never thought it would affect him so much to discover that the lock was gone. Sometime during the last few months, the authorities had removed it; and where it had once shone proudly, today there was nothing at all. He wiped away a lonely tear that rolled down his cheek, and without looking back, he set out on the road home.

*******

_(Ander)_

Ander returned to the hotel a couple of hours later, when the cold of the night reminded him that he had left his cap and scarf in the room, and when he had had enough of thinking about Omar's words.

As he walked up the elevator, he wished he could find Omar waiting for him, but he knew that he would most likely have left after the way he had behaved. He inserted the card in the lock and pushed the door open. Everything was completely dark, so he turned on the light in the entrance only to confirm that the room was empty.

He left his coat on a chair and sat up on the bed. Omar had told him that he hadn't fucked Keith; however, when he remembered how Omar had reacted, part of him refused to believe it. _"If not, how could this guy have become so important to Omar?_ -He asked himself for the umpteenth time.

Putting jealousy aside, he took his cell phone out of his pants and typed in Omar's name. For a moment, he stared at the screen without deciding to call him. He knew it was late, but he also knew that if he didn't try to work things out between them, he wouldn't be able to sleep. He needed to trust him... Finally, being with Omar had been the main reason he had applied for the scholarship.

After three tones, he heard his voice on the other end of the line. 

_-Ander?_ -He heard Omar call his name almost in a plea.

_-We need to talk, Omar._

_-Yes,_ -he answered in a muffled voice. _-Ander, I want to tell you that..._

- _I need you to let me talk, okay?_ -He interrupted him by softening his voice. _-Look, I know I didn't react in the best way possible, that I let jealousy get the better of me and that I didn't give you a chance to explain, but I don't have the right to act like this._

_-Ander listen..._

_-No, you listen to me; I want to tell you that I believe you. I believe you when you say that you haven't fucked this guy and that you're not in love with him. Besides, I have no right to be upset with you after what I did to you. Let's forget it, okay? And let's take it one step at a time just like you asked me to._

_(Omar)_

He never thought that Ander would call him that same night. Let alone hear him talk that way. So when he heard him say he believed him, he could only feel worse. He had never lied to him before, and now he didn't know how to tell him the truth. His throat was dry, and he felt a little dizzy, so he closed his eyes and swallowed. He needed to tell him the truth, but what if he ended up losing him?

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

*******


	30. For better or for worse

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!  
> Chapter 30 is ready! I hope you enjoy it.  
> We are almost coming to the end of this story.  
> Thanks for reading, commenting, or leaving a Kudo! It makes my day!  
> xoxo 🤍🖤

*******

- _I need you to let me talk, okay?_ -He interrupted him by softening his voice. _-Look, I know I didn't react in the best way possible, that I let jealousy get the better of me and that I didn't give you a chance to explain, but I don't have the right to act like this._

_-Ander listen..._

_-No, you listen to me; I want to tell you that I believe you. I believe you when you say that you haven't fucked this guy and that you're not in love with him. Besides, I have no right to be upset with you after what I did to you. Let's forget it, okay? And let's take it one step at a time just like you asked me to._

_(Omar)_

He never thought that Ander would call him that same night. Let alone hear him talk that way. So when he heard him say he believed him, he could only feel worse. He had never lied to him before, and now he didn't know how to tell him the truth. His throat was dry, and he felt a little dizzy, so he closed his eyes and swallowed. He needed to tell him the truth, but what if he ended up losing him?

*******

**Chapter 30. For better or for worse**

**_(Omar)_ **

****

_Two months later_

As soon as the bell rang to let people know that the class was over, he grabbed his backpack and walked at a fast pace to leave the room. If he were lucky, he would still find Ander, or at least he hoped he would. He was about to reach the end of the hall when he felt someone put an arm around his shoulders. 

_-Where are you going in such a hurry?_ -Keith looked at him curiously as he curved his lips into a smile.

_-Keith..._ -Omar greeted him, glancing sideways at the clock. 

_-If I didn't know you so well, I'd think you were avoiding me._

_-What are you saying, dude? It's not that... It's just that I'm meeting Ander and I'm already late._ -He lied.

Lately, he always had an implausible excuse for not meeting with him, so mentioning Ander seemed a lot more feasible.

As soon as he uttered Ander's name, Keith dropped his arm and stopped, forcing Omar to imitate him.

_-Ander? Really?_ -He saw his face change in expression, although Omar didn't overlook the effort he made to conceal it _. -Is this how it's going to be from now on? My favorite Spanish guy won't have time for me anymore?_

Omar looked down, feeling uncomfortable. Unlike previous semesters, this time, he and Keith were only in one class together, so he had taken advantage of this fact to avoid him as much as possible. 

Since Keith had returned from vacation, they had only spoken on a couple of times, and in one of those talks, he had taken the opportunity to tell him that Ander had finally decided to come live in New York. Keith had received the news so calmly; it seemed as if he already knew it in advance, which Omar found a bit strange, but he had not made any comments about it.

_-Of course not; it's just that I've been so busy between work and the beginning of the semester... I'm sorry, man._ -He managed to mumble.

_-Are you sure? When did that stop you from having a few drinks with me?_

_-Keith..._

_-I'm kidding, Omar... Look, I know that now that your ex has decided to study here, things won't be the same between us, but that doesn't mean you won't talk to me, right?_ -He forced a smile. 

_-Of course not. Let's meet for a few beers and catch up, shall we?_

Keith smiled _. -Okay, call me, and I'll come by your apartment. Besides, I think you and I have an unfinished conversation..._ -He raised an eyebrow, emphasizing this last part.

Omar looked away for a few seconds, but almost immediately, he pulled himself together and smiled at him and nodded.

_-Yeah, I know. I'll call you this weekend, I promise._

_-I'll be waiting for you._ -He hummed, unconvinced, before turning around and getting lost among the other students wandering down the hall.

Until Omar saw him walk away, he breathed normally again. He knew he couldn't keep avoiding him indefinitely. He owed Keith an explanation, and if he wanted things to go well with Ander, he needed to close that cycle soon. 

*******

Even though all the courts were occupied, it didn't take Omar more than a minute to find him. It seemed that as far as Ander was concerned, he had a very well developed radar to locate him easily. He walked to the tennis court where Ander was playing and dropped his backpack in one of the nearest stands, sat down to enjoy the game. 

As he watched him play each point with iron determination, he realized that it wasn't until Ander started playing for NYU that he had the opportunity to see him really in action, since during the time he played in Madrid, he had never done so. And now it was more than clear to him why he had gotten that athletic scholarship; Ander was a fucking crack.

In the last few weeks, watching him play had become one of his favorite activities. He was so proud of him that he couldn't help but get goosebumps when he saw him execute a perfect smash without warning. Omar could see how hard Ander worked at every training session and the joyful expression on his face at the end of each game made it clear how much he enjoyed it. Now it was about him and not an obligation imposed by his father.

On the previous occasions when Omar had gone to see him, Ander had always played singles, but that afternoon was a doubles match. Ander was playing with another guy that Omar had never seen before, and from what he could see, they were making a perfect dumbbell. He quickly scanned the guy and then turned his attention to Ander, but those seconds were enough to realize that the redhead was fucking hot.

Despite being training, both were fighting for every point as if they were playing the final Wimbledon match and not a place in the university's team. Although realistic, Omar recognized that at this point, earning a place on the sports team was the dream of every student who was playing, including Ander.

Ander was so focused on the game that he didn't realize that Omar had been sitting less than five meters away from where Ander was playing for quite some time. He didn't even do it -when after he performed a masterful backhand-, he and his partner won the set. 

Omar stood up and started clapping excitedly, but almost instantly, the smile faded from his face as he saw the redhead hugging him to celebrate the win and Ander hugging him back. Seconds later, he pressed his forehead against Ander's and then spanked him real quick, while Ander lifted his racket without being able to hide his happiness.

He knew it was foolish, but he couldn't suppress the pang of jealousy that invaded him when he saw so much familiarity between them. _"Who the hell was that asshole? Why hadn't Ander told him about him if it was obvious how well they got along?"_

As he tried to put things in perspective, the memory of Ander telling him that he believed him suddenly came back, turning the jealousy he was experiencing into guilt.

In an instant, everything around him became cloudy as he visualized the next morning after they argued over Keith. They had arranged to meet for breakfast and sitting at a table on _The Loeb Boathouse_ , Ander had reassured him again that he trusted him and was willing to take it one step at a time just as Omar had asked him to.

Although he had tried to tell him the truth that morning, the reality was that he hadn't tried hard enough because deep down, the fear that things between them would get screwed up again, had been much stronger. In his mind, he was comforted by the idea that when he had fucked Keith, he wasn't with Ander, so technically, he hadn't cheated on him. Although he knew perfectly well that the betrayal lay in fact, per se, of lying to him expressly when Ander had asked him.

_\- Pssst! Hey, Omar!_

Omar looked up and saw Ander walking towards him with his tennis bag hanging over his shoulder. He left his worries behind and automatically smiled.

_-Hey... Congratulations on the win. You played great._

_-Thanks... Hey, I didn't know you were coming_. -Ander smiled as he reached his side.

_-Yeah, well... I didn't have class at this time, so I decided to come and see you play._

At that moment, he heard a deep voice calling Ander; both of them turned their eyes towards the redheaded guy who was a few meters away from them, waiting for Ander.

_-I'm coming!_ -Ander shouted, and then he focused his attention again on Omar.

_-Hey, I have to go. The coach wants to talk to us..._

_-With both of you?_ -He couldn't help but ask.

_-Yeah, with Joshua and me..._ -He nodded to the redhead _. -Josh is my new training partner..._

_"Josh... What the fuck...?"_ -He couldn't help but be bothered by the familiarity with which he spoke of him. He knew he didn't have to, but he still couldn't help it.

_-Okay, I have to go to the library anyway, so..._

_-I'll look for you when I'm done, and if you're done too, we could meet for a while; what do you say?_

He was about to answer him when Ander's new friend called him again.

_-Ander, we have to go!_

Ander didn't wait for Omar to answer. He just adjusted the strap of his sports bag on his shoulder and mumbled before running to the redhead:

_-Okay, we'll talk later._

He saw them walking away, chatting animatedly. Because of the distance, he couldn't hear their conversation. Still, apparently, Ander had said something hilarious because _"the redhead"_ \- as Omar had decided to call him - laughed as he held his hand over Ander's hair to undo his curls. 

Omar clenched his jaw and turning his back on them; he picked up his backpack and started walking in the opposite direction. He didn't know if it was his paranoia, but he felt a little distant from Ander in the last few days. Sometimes, he would catch him looking at him pensively, and when Omar would ask him what he was thinking, Ander would just nod and talk about any other thing. When that happened, he couldn't stop thinking about how he had lied to his face.

On the other hand, the sex between them was spectacular as always. Still, in between Ander's workouts, the coupling with the classes and now sleeping on campus had considerably decreased the time they spent together. 

Still, Omar had again given him a copy of the key to his apartment so he could come and go as he pleased. This time, he had attached it to a key ring shaped like a golden lock. It didn't have their initials like the one they attached to a beam on the Brooklyn Bridge, but he thought the meaning would be clear to Ander.

_"Just in case one day your roommate doesn't let you sleep and you want to come over and keep me company,"_ -He had told him with a playful smile.

Ander had looked at the key first and then at him as if he hesitated to accept, but after a few seconds that seemed like years to Omar, he took the key and ran his fingers through the lock before putting it in his pants pocket. Although he didn't recognize it aloud, Omar had made that last move, in a desperate attempt to tell him, without words, that he wanted to go back to him. 

He didn't know if Ander was taking the step-by-step thing too seriously or had changed his mind without Omar knowing, but he hadn't spoken about the possibility to get back together.

What he had told Ander about going to the library wasn't entirely a lie since he had to research a project that was due the following week. Still, after seeing him leave with that guy, all he wanted to do was lock himself in his flat and analyze Ander's behavior. 

A couple of hours later, he still hadn't heard from Ander, which only made the uncertainty of where they were standing increase to unsuspected levels. He finished the third beer, crushed the aluminum can, and then tried to make a basket inside the trash can, failing miserably. He let out a snort, and at that moment, he made a decision.

He would have that conversation with Keith and tell him the truth. That he was Ander and that he would always be Ander. He hoped that his friend would understand and continue their friendship because he really cared about him. Afterward, he would talk to Ander and tell him that he didn't want to wait any longer, that he was sure of his feelings for him, and that he really wanted them to try it once again.

When he came to that conclusion, he felt like he was automatically relieved of a heavy burden that would have been pressing on his chest, and with a smile on his face, he called Keith. 

Keith hadn't hidden his surprise when Omar asked him to stop by his place for a few beers and chat, so without hesitation, Keith hung up before telling him he'd be there in an hour or so.

While he waited, he dropped onto the couch and opened Instagram. The first thing he saw was a story that Ander had just uploaded. A boomerang of Ander with the redhead drinking tequila shots and a sticker with the legend " _champs."_

He didn't know how many times he watched the video, but the unpleasant sensation he felt in his chest only intensified more every minute that passed. He didn't like what he saw at all, and he knew he needed to talk to Ander soon. The ringing of the cellphone distracted him for a moment; when he saw that it was Ander who was calling, he took a deep breath before answering as calm as he could.

_-Hola nene..._

_-Omaaar!_ -Ander shouted so loudly that he had to pull his mobile apart from his ear. 

Omar could hear the music in the background and the noise of people singing at the same time.

_-Where are you?_ -He asked, trying to sound casual, knowing in advance what Ander would say.

Ignoring his question, Ander yelled at him:

_-As of today, I'm officially a member of the NYU Tennis team!_

He couldn't have been as happy as he would have liked, since Ander was celebrating that great achievement next to the redhead and not with him; but even so, he tried to overcome it and managed to whisper sincerely:

_-Congratulations, Ander, you've earned it. You've worked very hard to get it. We should celebrate, shouldn't we?_ -He mumbled, waiting for his answer.

_-Yeah, for sure. Josh literally dragged me to a bar to celebrate because he's achieved it too... Why don't I send you the address and you come?_

Omar thought about his options. He could call Keith and save that talk for another day and go looking for Ander to make it clear to that redheaded guy that Ander wasn't available. But he didn't want to put off that conversation any longer.

_-Mmm... I don't know, Ander, I'm a little bit tired. I'd prefer to celebrate it tomorrow, is it okay for you?_

_-Are you sure? If you don't feel like coming, I can make up any excuse and come to your place..._

_-No, it's fine. Have fun with your friend, and I'll see you tomorrow._

- _Vale..._ _I'll call you when I get to campus._

_-Talk to you later._

*******

Half an hour later, Keith arrived at his apartment with beers and a cautious look on his face. They went straight to the kitchen and opening a couple of beers; they sat down in front of the kitchen counter.

_-Are you all right?_ -He heard him ask as he took a sip of his beer.

_-Yes, why do you ask?_ -He muttered, trying to smile.

_-I don't know, but it seems like someone has pissed you off._

_-No... Not at all. Hey, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, man._ -He whispered.

_-What are you sorry for? That you've been avoiding me all this time since your ex is here? Or that you regret that we fucked again? –_ –He challenged him, grimacing.

_-Keith... Don't do this. Don't make me feel like the complete asshole I am..._

_-Do what, Omar? I thought things were clear between us... and then I don't know how but we fucked again, and it was fucking awesome... You can't deny it._

_-Keith... Listen, I want you to know that..._

The sound of something metallic hitting the ground interrupted him. 

_-What the fuck...?_ -The words choked in his throat as he saw Ander a few feet from the door with an indecipherable expression on his face and the key with the lock at his feet.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_from @piper_ayuso Ig account_

*******


	31. Show me how little you care

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! Chapter 31 is ready!  
> After some comments I received, I decided to make some changes to the plot. This chapter wasn't planned this way; still, I hope you enjoy it.  
> As always, I'd love to read your opinion.  
> xoxo 😙

*******

_-Keith... Don't do this. Don't make me feel like the complete asshole I am..._

_-Do what, Omar? I thought things were clear between us... and then I don't know how but we fucked again, and it was fucking awesome... You can't deny it._

_-Keith... Listen, I want you to know that..._

The sound of something metallic hitting the ground interrupted him. 

_-What the fuck...?_ -The words choked in his throat as he saw Ander a few feet from the door with an indecipherable expression on his face and the key with the lock at his feet.

*******

**Chapter 31. Show me how little you care**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_Thirty minutes earlier_

_-Cheers, champ! To us!_ -Josh bumped his shot into Ander's, and they both drank it in one gulp. Ander let out a grunt when the tequila scraped his throat, and grimacing, he slid the empty glass over the bar.

He felt like he was floating on a cloud and could hardly believe that what was happening to him was real. In just two months, he had accomplished what he set out to do; be a part of the NYU men's university tennis team. It sounded so amazing, for a moment, he thought about pinching himself to make sure he wasn't dreaming, but when he felt Josh's firm pat on his back, he knew it wouldn't be necessary. 

_-Estás contento?_ -He asked in Spanish with a slight accent.

He had only met Josh a month earlier when the coach had put them in pairs to practice, and from that moment on, they had become inseparable. Josh had been born in Los Angeles, California, to an American father and Argentinean mother, so he spoke Spanish almost as fluently as he did English. And like Ander, he also lived on campus except that he was a sophomore in Business. 

It seemed that lately, his _"gaydar"_ was more accurate than ever since from the first day he got to know him, he had this feeling that Josh was into guys, but he had decided that it wasn't something he wanted to talk about. It wasn't until a few days later that Josh himself brought up the subject when he openly asked him if he had a boyfriend. Ander had burst out laughing at the naturalness with which Josh had asked him.

_"Mmm... sort of... it's a long story"_

_"I'd love to hear it someday…"_ -Josh had responded, playfully punching him in the arm.

Back in the present, and in the middle of a crowded bar full of drunk students, Ander turned his attention back to Josh. He wasn't blind and had to admit that Josh was a good-looking guy. With his 6'4", athletic body, and strong features, he'd be lying if he said he hadn't noticed but decided he wasn't his type. He had never really asked himself if he had a specific type of man before, but Omar's face almost immediately appeared in his mind, making him smile.

_-¡Más que contento, chaval! ¡Estoy flipando!_ -He replied in Spanish as well.

To get there, he had made many sacrifices, as it was not only the last two months of hard training in which he had had to put aside several important things, among them, spending time with Omar in his free time. It had also been all the previous months in which he had been practicing night and day in Madrid with the most demanding coach he had ever had: his father. 

He wanted to call him and his mother to give them the news, but before them, there was one more person he wanted to share his happiness with. It was for that reason that he called Omar. He couldn't wait to tell him what he had accomplished, and he wanted him to be there to celebrate. But when Omar told him that he felt tired and preferred to celebrate the next day, his mood changed. He tried to keep smiling while Josh and the rest of their friends sang and cheered excitedly.

Less than ten minutes later, he decided he'd had enough. Even though he was having fun, he needed Omar right there to be completely fulfilled. The idea of spending the night in Omar's arms was much more tempting than staying at that bar to get drunk with his friends. 

He reached into his pants pocket and caressed the small metal lock that Omar had given him weeks earlier, along with the key to his apartment. At that moment, he couldn't say anything to him because that gesture had taken him by surprise, but the feeling of warmth he experienced was priceless. He never expected that Omar would do something like this in such a short time, and even more when it had been evident that he needed time.

As he recalled that moment, an idea began to take shape in his brain, and so, from one minute to the next, he knew what he would do next. He didn't know if the courage he was experiencing was due to alcohol or endorphins being released, but he didn't care. He needed to see Omar and convince him that there was no need to wait any longer. He wanted to feel safe about him; to be able to hold his hand and kiss him wherever they were without feeling threatened that at any moment Keith or some other guy might show up and everything would fall apart. He wanted everyone to know that they belonged to each other.

_-I'll see you tomorrow._ -He whispered in Josh's ear. And before Josh could protest, he hurried out to get lost among the people heading for the subway.

He walked to the nearest station and got into the first carriage he could find that was more or less free. There were only four stations away from Omar's apartment, and he couldn't wait to see his face when he caught him telling him that he would be spending the night with him. He leaned against the train doors and thought about how he would manage the elephant in the room once and for all.

He wanted to open up with Omar completely, without fear. Tell him that he didn't want to wait any longer, that he needed him today more than ever. During these two months, he had waited patiently, giving Omar the space he needed and trying not to pressure him, but every time he looked at Omar, he thought he read in his eyes that he also felt the same way he did.

He got off the subway and once he was one block away, he saw a drugstore and let out a chuckle. Five minutes later, he came out with a pack of cigarettes and the strawberry lube that had become their favorite. When he was in front of the building, he breathed and let the air slowly escape. He didn't know why, but suddenly nerves took hold of him. _"What if he was rushing? What if Omar was rejecting him?”_

_-Don't panic now... Everything will be all right._ -He whispered, hoping that the elevator doors would open.

Before entering the apartment, he looked at his watch. It wasn't as late as he had thought, so he hoped for Omar to still be awake, although on second thought if Omar was asleep, he could put into practice a couple of ideas he had come up with to wake him up. He smiled at the erotic images that flooded his memories and slowly opened the door.

He hadn't advanced even two steps when a terribly familiar voice stopped him in his tracks. The voices came from the kitchen, and even without clearly understanding the conversation, he knew beforehand that it hadn't been a good idea to appear without warning. For a moment, he thought of turning around and leaving, but the anxiety that began to take hold of him wouldn't allow him. He wouldn't be able to leave without knowing what was happening. _"Why had Omar lied to him that he preferred to rest?"_

A feeling of uneasiness invaded him. He wouldn't eavesdrop on someone else's talk under normal conditions, but this time he couldn't contain himself. He walked slowly and stopped when he saw them sitting drinking beer in front of the kitchen bar. Keith's deep voice telling Omar that he couldn't deny that the last time they had fucked had been awesome, made him almost throw up.

He didn't realize that he dropped the key on the floor in an attempt not to lose his balance due to the shock, making them both turn towards him. Omar's face said it all. Ander could see the horror reflected in Omar's eyes when their glances met. Nothing made sense. He couldn't believe that Omar had lied to him like that, and at that moment, he didn't know what hurt the most. Knowing that Omar had been fucking Keith behind his back or lying to him that he had a chance to get back together with him like he used to.

_-Ander... What are you doing here?_ -Omar stuttered, walking towards him.

Instinctively Ander took a couple of steps back, looking first at Keith, who looked clearly uncomfortable, and then staring at Omar. When Omar was close enough, Ander raised his arm to keep him from coming any closer.

_-Don't touch me._ -He hissed, running a hand across his eyelids as he felt his eyes burn from the tears that threatened to come out.

He clenched his jaw so hard that it made his teeth grind. Simultaneously, he began to feel his hands shaking uncontrollably, so he clenched his fists until he felt his nails digging into the palm of his hand. Under no circumstances would he show them how much he was hurting. He would have time to cry and lick his wounds when no one would see him.

_"If Omar had done this to get back at him for the mistakes he had made, he was doing fucking awesome."_ -He thought bitterly.

_-Ander, please... let me explain_. -Omar whispered, without attempting to touch him again as if he knew he had to keep his distance if he didn't want Ander to lose control.

Ander laughed in disbelief when he saw Keith squirm uncomfortably, looking at them. Ander bit his lower lip, shaking his head.

_-You have nothing to explain to me; I've heard what I need to know._

_-Ander, it's not what it looks like..._

_-Seriously? Are you going to tell me I heard wrong? Or that it wasn't such a memorable fuck after all?_

- _Hey, you should listen to Omar..._ -Keith intervened.

_-Jodeeer! Stay out of this... It's none of your fucking business! You'll have all the time in the world from now on to be with him._ -He glanced sidelong at Omar as he answered Keith. _-I don't care anymore..._

_-Ander, please..._ -This time, Omar grabbed his arm in an attempt to stop him when he made a threat to leave.

_-Let go of me, damn it!_ -And breaking out of his grip, he stormed out of the apartment, slamming the door in his wake.

He was barely aware that Omar was still shouting his name. The tears that were now falling freely clouded his vision, and he only wished to get as far away from Omar as possible.

He walked around aimlessly until he realized where his steps had led him. He sobbed when he realized that he was on the Brooklyn Bridge, right where they had hung that lock several years earlier. Unable to help himself, he looked for it and was not surprised to see that it was gone. Just as that lock had disappeared, it seemed that this was the end of his story with Omar.

*******

_-What's happening to you today, huh?_ -Josh mumbled so the coach couldn't hear him.

_-I'm just having a bad day, that's all..._ -Ander replied in the same tone. He didn't have the strength to fake a smile, so he didn't even make an effort to try.

_-You better focus if you don't want the coach to change his mind._ -He encouraged him by spanking him once before continuing with the practice.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Unlike previous workouts where he enjoyed every minute to the fullest, today, he just wished it would be over; he could shower and leave to sink into his misery. He knew he had a project due next week, but now he couldn't think of anything but the cruel way Omar had made fun of him.

He got out of the showers and got dressed as quickly as he could, as he wanted to avoid bumping into Josh since he knew that if he asked him again what was going on, he would collapse right there in front of him, and he didn't want to humiliate himself that way. He hurried off to his bedroom, hoping that Tom -his roommate-, hadn't arrived yet. He needed a moment alone since the night before he hadn't been able to vent as he would have liked because his roomie was already there. 

That was one of the things he missed most about Madrid; the privacy of his room. Now he couldn't even cry for fear that Tom would find out. When he arrived at the dorms, he let out a sigh of relief when he saw that the room was empty. At least he would have a couple of hours to be alone. He thought about calling Guzman but quickly dismissed the idea. If he told him what was going on, he would tell Nadia, and she would talk to Omar. No. He definitely couldn't do that because he didn't want Omar to know how much he had hurt him.

He had already lost track of how many times he had rewinded his brain about what had happened the night before, but finally, he knew for sure what hurt him the most. It wasn't the fact that Omar had fucked Keith in the past because deep down, he always knew even though he desperately tried to take Omar's word for it. What really hurt him was to know that Omar had lied to his face all this time and continued to fuck Keith while also sleeping with him. So while he had tried hard to understand him, to give him the space he had said he needed it, and wait until he was ready to try again, Omar had made fun of him. 

_"Because that's what Keith had implied, right? If it weren't, Omar wouldn't have lied to him about being tired, hoping he'd stay at the bar and party so he'd feel free to invite Keith to his apartment."_ -His mind was in chaos, and he no longer knew what to think. 

_"What an asshole... How could you be so naive?"_ -He wiped away the tears, feeling upset but mostly tired. He was sick of it; tired of trying to rebuild a clearly unsolvable relationship.

Omar had called him almost the minute after he left his place, and he continued to do so for the next half hour as if he was possessed. That's why he had turned off his cell phone and hadn't turned it back on until now. As soon as he did so, dozens of missed call notifications, voicemails, and messages from Omar asking him to answer popped up. He stared at the cellphone, not really reading beyond the first message, assuming that it would be the same shit with the rest of them.

_"Do you really expect me to answer, you asshole?_ -He hissed, muting the phone before throwing it into bed.

He dropped on his stomach and let the tears roll freely down his cheeks. He hoped that somehow crying would help him stop feeling the pain that was so deep in his chest. It was not the first time he had felt it; over the past six years - since he had met Omar to be more precise - he had experienced it several times, and although he knew that some of it had been because of him, this time, he wanted to believe that he didn't deserve it.

During the last year, he had done too much to get Omar back, and after so many sacrifices, so many tears shed on those lonely nights... today he had discovered that there was no point in trying any longer. Little by little, the dream began to overcome him, and as he fell deeply into it -still lucid- he made a decision. This would be the last time he would shed a tear for Omar. Starting tomorrow, he would begin a new life where Omar would never again be a part of it.

He woke up when his body made an involuntary movement. He had been dreaming that he was falling off a cliff, and that unpleasant sensation made him open his eyes suddenly. He was still upside down, but somehow, he felt that he was being watched. The room was completely silent, and for a few seconds, he didn't move. He sharpened his ear and could only hear the voices and some laughter coming from the hallway. He brought his hands to his eyes by rubbing his eyelids and then turned his head to the next bed, thinking he would find Tom. He felt as if his heart was going to jump out of his chest as he saw Omar sitting in front of him, staring at him.

*******


	32. Think I always knew

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Chapter 32 is ready, hope you like it. 🥺🥺🥺  
> xoxo

*******

He dropped on his stomach and let the tears roll freely down his cheeks. He hoped that somehow crying would help him stop feeling the pain that was so deep in his chest. It was not the first time he had felt it; over the past six years - since he had met Omar to be more precise - he had experienced it several times, and although he knew that some of it had been because of him, this time, he wanted to believe that he didn't deserve it.

During the last year, he had done too much to get Omar back, and after so many sacrifices, so many tears shed on those lonely nights... today he had discovered that there was no point in trying any longer. Little by little, the dream began to overcome him, and as he fell deeply into it -still lucid- he made a decision. This would be the last time he would shed a tear for Omar. Starting tomorrow, he would begin a new life where Omar would never again be a part of it.

He woke up when his body made an involuntary movement. He had been dreaming that he was falling off a cliff, and that unpleasant sensation made him open his eyes suddenly. He was still upside down, but somehow, he felt that he was being watched. The room was completely silent, and for a few seconds, he didn't move. He sharpened his ear and could only hear the voices and some laughter coming from the hallway. He brought his hands to his eyes by rubbing his eyelids and then turned his head to the next bed, thinking he would find Tom. He felt as if his heart was going to jump out of his chest as he saw Omar sitting in front of him, staring at him.

*******

**Chapter 32. Think I always knew**

**_(Ander)_ **

It took him a few seconds to react. Ander didn't know if he was dreaming or if Omar was really sitting in front of him. He looked at him from head to toe, and when he looked at his face, he realized that it wasn't a dream. Omar was in _his_ room. He was wearing the same clothes as the night before, with puffy eyelids and dark circles under his eyes.

_"Had he been crying because he felt guilty?_ -He quickly dismissed that thought, telling himself that he shouldn't care. He hardened his features when he heard Omar call his name, though he felt shattered inside.

_-What the hell are you doing here? How did you get in?_ -He jumped to his feet.

_-Ander... please give me a chance to explain_. -Omar begged in a shaky voice.

_-Explain? Ha! Do you really think that I need you to explain something to me after what I saw yesterday?_ -He rebuked him, looking him in the eye.

Omar was not able to hold his gaze. Ander saw him bow his head and focus his attention on his hands. Omar suppressed a sob and then looked at him again.

_-I lied to you because..._

Ander raised both eyebrows, letting out a snort, interrupting him.

- _Really? You don't tell me!_ -He mocked him. _-Let me guess... You lied to me because you had something with that asshole, and out of nowhere, I reappeared in your life to mess it up... but instead of being honest with me, you decided to make me believe that I had a chance to get you back, so you could get back at me for what I did to you, didn't you?_

_-Of course not! You're wrong!_ -Omar looked very upset, and when he tried to touch him, Ander pushed him away. _-Don't fucking touch me!_

_-Ander... please listen to me._

_-Are you saying I'm wrong? Then tell me why you lied to me... Tell me why you kept fucking him while we were supposed to try again! -_ He shouted at him.

_-I haven't fucked him since you came back! I lied to you because I was afraid that if I told you the truth, you would decide that it wasn't worth trying one more time... and then I was cowardly enough to keep quiet, but between him and I, there's been nothing for a long time... you have to believe me._

_-Sure... That's why he came to your place out of the blue last night, right? You were already asleep because you were so fucking tired, and out of nowhere, he came to see you and talk about the awesome fuck you both shared... -_ He spat out the words with sarcasm.

_-Tell me something, does he fuck better than me?_

He saw Omar clench his jaw and wipe his tears with the back of his hand to face him.

_-Don't do this..._

_-Tell me! I wanna know! Does he fuck you better than I do? Is that it? You're bored of fucking with me already, aren't you?_

He knew he was losing control, but it was as if his mouth had a will of its own and couldn't keep quiet. A mixture of pain, anger, and jealousy had taken hold of him, and he wanted to hurt him as much or more than he had hurt him.

_-I'm not gonna answer that._

_-Then get out of here!_ -He hissed, trying in vain not to lose his temper.

_-No! I'm not leaving until you listen to me._

Ander bit his bottom lip so hard that he noticed the unmistakable metallic taste of blood, but before he could say anything else, Omar talked again.

_-I called him and asked him to stop by my place because I owed him an explanation. During these months, I was avoiding him, and he deserved to know why. I wanted to tell him that nothing can exist between him and I because... because... it's you I'm in love with..._

_-Don't make me laugh. If you were in love with me, you wouldn't have acted the way you did. Why, instead of lying to me, saying that you were too tired to go to the bar, you didn't tell me the truth, ah? You had many opportunities to do so, and yet you preferred to shut up and make fun of me..._

_-I swear it's not like that, Ander... I just wanted to end this once and for all and start over... I was wrong... You have to believe me._

_-Well, I don't. And even if it were true what you say, you know something? I am fed up..._

_-Ander..._

_-It's the truth Omar; I'm tired of trying over and over again..._

At that moment, he was no longer able to hold back for one more minute, and hating himself for being so weak, he let the tears roll down his cheeks without even trying to stop them. He let himself fall back on the bed and put both hands to his face. He felt so tired, physically, and emotionally that all he wanted was for Omar to leave him alone.

_-You know, I think I always knew deep down that it would be you who would end up with this..._

_-Please don't say that Ander..._ -Omar begged him in a whisper, sitting next to him.

Ander looked at him for a few seconds and then looked away before speaking.

_-I'm gonna be honest with you... I want to end all this. I know I can forget about you and that's what I'll do. Please go, we have nothing more to talk about._ -He mumbled, wiping away his tears furiously.

After he uttered those words, Omar said nothing else. He stood motionless by his side, wiping his nose as he tried to hold back the crying. Ander wasn't able to look at him; he just stared at the floor, waiting for him to leave. Those minutes seemed like hours to him until he finally saw Omar stand up and walk to the exit.

_-You have no idea how sorry I am that I hurt you, and I hope we can talk when you're a little calmer._ -Omar whispered before leaving.

When Ander saw him leave by gently closing the door, he felt his heart breaking into a thousand pieces.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

He closed the door behind him and leaned against it for a few seconds, wiping away his tears. He took several deep breaths to try to calm himself down, but he knew it was no use. There was nothing he could do to feel better. At least not at that moment, and if he couldn't get Ander to change his mind, he wouldn't be well for a long time.

He started walking down the long corridor with lost eyesight and mechanical movements. He didn't care at all about what was going on around him; he could only relive Ander's harsh words and the way he had looked at him over and over again. Just remembering this, his body shook unavoidably. Omar had never seen him so angry before, and he was afraid that this time there would be no chance to make things right between them.

Everything that could have gone wrong had happened, and Omar knew he couldn't blame anyone but himself. If he had spoken the truth as Ander had said, maybe things would be very different now, but there was nothing he could do but wait. A blow to the shoulder made him lose his balance, and if it hadn't been for a pair of steady hands holding him, he would have ended up on the floor.

_-Whoa! Are you okay, buddy?_

_-Yes... I'm fine, sorry...._ -When he lifted his face, the apology died instantly on his lips as he realized who he had hit. The _"redhead"_ took a step back, looking at him curiously. 

_-You're Ander's boyfriend, aren't you?_ -He asked, narrowing his eyes with suspicion.

That question alone was enough to make his eyes cloudy again because of the tears. Musing something unintelligible, he turned his back and ran off. The fact that the guy thought Ander was his boyfriend only made him feel worse. If he had said that, it was because Ander had told him about him... and that was more than Omar could handle. Sadly, he realized that the jealousy he had experienced from seeing so much camaraderie between them had been entirely unfounded. 

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

The place was packed. As he made his way through the crowd, he tried to meet some familiar faces, but he couldn't. He didn't remember how he got there or why. He kept going until he crossed a gate that separated the house from the garden; outside, the atmosphere was much more tolerable as the music, and the chit-chat of the people dissipated a little. It was a pleasant night, with the breeze of the wind blowing his face which somehow made him feel at peace. That satisfying feeling he was experiencing vanished when he looked up and spotted them. 

They were in the corner of the garden, and thanks to the trees' foliage, they were unnoticed by the rest of the people, but not by him. Omar's silhouette was unmistakable, so he began to sneak up on them so as not to be discovered; when he got close enough, he could distinguish his features better. Keith raised a hand to stroke his hair and then held it up to the back of Omar's neck as he told him how much he had missed him. Omar smiled at him, moved his lips closer to Keith's, and kissed him as he used to do it with him.

The alarm buzzer woke him up. Slowly his heartbeat began to return to a slower pace, but the feeling of anxiety he was experiencing didn't stop. He sat up on the bed, still suffering the ravages of that nightmare.

_-Nightmares again?_ -Tom asked, looking at him, amused. _-You should buy one of those shits... Dreamcatchers they call them?_

_-Fuck off..._ -He mumbled, rubbing his eyelids.

_-I'm just saying... You've been having nightmares all fucking month, and you won't let me sleep. Although I must say it's fun listening to you talk in your dreams... you keep naming a certain Omar. Would you like to tell me about it?_

Ander finished dressing, took his tennis bag, and left the room, giving Tom the finger before leaving. Even after closing the door, he could hear his roommate laughing his head off.

_"A month and three weeks... to be more precise,"_ -Ander muttered reluctantly as he headed for the tennis courts.

College life at NYU turned out to be much more absorbing than it was in Madrid. Of course, he knew it was mainly due to tennis, since in Spain he was only a hundred percent dedicated to his studies, and here, in addition to having to meet project and exam deadlines, he had doubled his training hours, leaving almost no free time, which was perfect for him. The less dead hours he had, the less he was thinking about Omar, although it was clear that even in his dreams, he hadn't been able to get him out of his head.

The first few days had been fucking hard. He had had to make a significant effort to get his ass out of bed and try to lead a more or less everyday life. Almost two months after that fateful night, he could tell that although he was far from happy, at least he no longer looked like a wounded animal. He didn't know if it had helped or not, the fact that as the days went by, Omar had also given up trying to convince him to talk.

He was thankful that during all this time, he hadn't come across Omar. He knew that because they had completely different agendas and the university was big enough, it was unlikely, but not impossible. So even though he wanted to deny it, he knew that sooner or later that day would come, but he hoped that when it did, he would be strong enough not to show him how much it still hurt.

Although he had spoken to Guzman, he didn't want to detail when Guzman asked him how things were going with Omar. He had simply grunted and told him that neither of them was on the same road. Guzman knew him well since he hadn't insisted on getting more information out of him after such a brief answer, but even so, Ander knew he would talk to Nadia.

The one who had made it easy for him had been Josh. Even though they knew each other little, it seemed that he understood him better than anyone since, with his affable character and biting sense of humor, he had made the pain that Ander felt much more bearable. Only once had he asked about Omar, but he never spoke about him again when he got a refusal from him. 

He focused on the training and put aside Omar's memories. That weekend, he and Josh would travel to New Jersey for their first doubles tournament.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

_-Are you going to spend another weekend locked up?_ -Keith barked from the other side of the line.

_-I don't feel like going out..._ -He answered, dragging the words. 

He finished the rest of the beer in his hand and threw it into the trash can. It fell half a meter from its destination, keeping company with six other empty cans lying on the floor. His apartment was a mess, just like his life, but he couldn't care less. He continued to attend classes because he still had a shred of common sense left, and he knew that he couldn't afford to lose his scholarship at this point in his major. But as soon as Friday arrived, he would run home and spend most of the weekend drunk.

_-Omar... that's what you said last weekend and the weekend before that_ -Keith confronted him. 

_-Leave me alone..._

_-Look, asshole, I know you're having a hard time, but your life can't go to hell just because you lost Ander._

The mere mention of Ander made him close his eyes and bite his lip, trying to hold back his tears. He didn't want to talk about Ander to Keith or anyone else. He knew that the way he was coping with Ander's rejection was shitty, but he didn't care at all; he just wanted to stop feeling that pain that went through his chest like a dagger.

_-I don't want to talk about that..._ -And without further ado, he hung up.

Soon it would be two months since Ander decided that he wasn't worth it. The first few days had been hell, but as time went on, things didn't seem to get any better, and a lot of it had to do with the stupid decisions he was making. 

It wasn't the first time that he and Ander had had problems, but it was the first time that something inside him told him that Ander had stopped loving him. All his attempts to get Ander to listen to him had been futile, so in the end, he had given up. Deep down, he knew that at some point, he would be okay again; that he would eventually accept it and get over it, but at that moment, he saw the possibility so far away that he simply stopped trying.

He was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall. He couldn't remember exactly when he had last eaten or slept, so he closed his eyes and tried to remember. _"Yesterday?"_ -He blinked, his head feeling dull. He knew perfectly well why he wasn't hungry or sleepy. He turned his head and grimaced as he saw a couple of lines of coke lining up perfectly on the bedside table.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_from @piper_ayuso Ig_

  
He looked around and found what he was looking for. At the foot of the bed was the half-drunk bottle of whiskey; as best he could, he crawled to reach it. He opened it and gave it a sip, feeling the alcohol burn in his throat. He put it aside and walked over to the table. For a few seconds, he stared at the white powder feeling nothing. He didn't know precisely how long it had been since he had sniffed the last line, but he didn't care that much either.

_"A la mierda..."_

He sniffed and immediately felt a powerful effect. Omar closed his eyes and let himself fall back to the floor feeling euphoric. Suddenly, everything began to spin, and before he knew it, everything turned black around him.

*******


	33. It hurts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone!  
> Chapter 33 is ready. 
> 
> This time, I struggled with this chapter 'cause I tried to change my writing style playing with past and present... So, I'm not sure if I achieved what I was looking for... I'm sorry if this change confuses you a little... ;( Nevertheless, I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> xoxo

*******

He was sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall. He couldn't remember exactly when he had last eaten or slept, so he closed his eyes and tried to remember. _"Yesterday?"_ -He blinked, his head feeling dull. He knew perfectly well why he wasn't hungry or sleepy. He turned his head and grimaced as he saw a couple of lines of coke lining up perfectly on the bedside table.

He looked around and found what he was looking for. At the foot of the bed was the half-drunk bottle of whiskey; as best he could, he crawled to reach it. He opened it and gave it a sip, feeling the alcohol burn in his throat. He put it aside and walked over to the table. For a few seconds, he stared at the white powder feeling nothing. He didn't know precisely how long it had been since he had sniffed the last line, but he didn't care that much either.

_"A la mierda..."_

He sniffed and immediately felt a powerful effect. Omar closed his eyes and let himself fall back to the floor feeling euphoric. Suddenly, everything began to spin, and before he knew it, everything turned black around him.

*******

**Chapter 33. It hurts**

**_(Ander)_ **

He had lost all sense of time. He moved slightly, searching for a more comfortable position in that metal chair, which was practically impossible. Only after feeling his legs numb and taking a quick look at the clock was he aware that a little over two hours had passed.

He closed his eyes and put his hands on his eyelids, pressing harder than necessary, and stayed in that position for several minutes. His eyes were burning, and he wasn't sure if it was due to the tiredness or the tears he had been trying to hold back. He didn't want to open his eyes; he didn't need to look to know that everything around him would continue exactly as it had in the last two hours.

The constant whispers, perhaps one or two different faces walking down the corridor in those awful blue uniforms, and that unmistakable smell that brought him back such bad memories. It didn't matter that it was another place thousands of miles away; that smell would always be the same here, in Madrid, or anywhere else in the world. He couldn't believe what was happening and only wished that it would all be over soon with all his might.

A voice calling him forced him to open his eyes and concentrate for a moment on his interlocutor. He forced himself to look up, feeling the panic taking hold of him. When his gaze crossed with the other's, he could see that there was also fear in his eyes, but that was the least of his worries.

_"Please... Please..._ -He repeated mentally, over and over again as if it were a mantra. He stood up and walked towards him.

*******

_Three hours earlier_

_-Did you say you'll be away all weekend? -_ Tom asked again, jumping up and down to land on the bed. 

_-Aha..._ -Ander hummed as he finished packing.

_-Great! I'll have the room to myself!_ -He burst out laughing and couldn't hide his enthusiasm. _-You can be sure I won't miss this opportunity..._

Ander looked at him sideways, and when he saw his roommate making the universal gesture that he was going to fuck, he rolled his eyes.

_-If you're going to use our room to fuck some unfortunate girl, just do it in your bed... Don't even think about using mine... -_ He said sternly, although, in the end, he couldn't help but curve his lips into a smile. 

_-Obviously! I wouldn't be able to use your bed..._ -He funnily winked at him. - _By the way, are you sharing a room with Josh this weekend? If so, I pity him..._

Tom knew Josh because, during his off-hours, Josh used to spend time in their room playing video games, and as a result, the three had forged a good friendship.

_-What do you mean?_ -Ander looked at him for a moment, raising an eyebrow.

_-Well, that poor guy doesn't know what he's in for. He won't sleep because of your nightmares._

_-Shut the fuck up!_ -Ander muttered before he put his suitcase over his shoulder. 

Although he would never admit it out loud -let alone in front of Tom-, Ander knew his roomie was right. The nightmares far from disappearing had increased in the last few days, and in each one of them, Omar and Keith were the main characters.

_-Are you going to stand there and daydream?_ -Tom scoffed. - _I suggest you move your ass if you don't want to be late._

_-You're an asshole... Did you know that?_ -Ander hissed, showing his middle finger.

- _But that's how you love me!_ -He yelled.

As annoying as Tom could be at times, he really liked that boy. He clasped his hand in farewell and mumbled before leaving:

_-I'll see you Sunday night... Ah! And clean the room before I get there... I wouldn't want to find used condoms under the bed._

Josh shrugged as if he couldn't be sure of that, and then he laughed. Before closing the door, Ander heard the music playing loudly and Tom dancing in the middle of the room, looking at himself in the mirror. He rolled his eyes once more at how childish Tom could be and shook his head, thinking about how easy his partner's life seemed to be - all the opposite of what he was living-.

_-Gilipollas..._ -He muttered, closing the door behind him.

*******

According to the coach's instructions, the entire team had to travel to New Jersey that Friday night to sleep at the hotel and be rested enough to start the tournament early Saturday morning.

When he left the dorms, Josh was already waiting for him at the entrance of the building. They had arranged to meet there, to leave in the university van that would transport them to the hotel. The trip was relatively short, so if everything went according to plan, they would be arriving around eight o'clock at night. 

Once they greeted each other, they walked across campus to the meeting point. Although it was already spring, the temperature usually dropped a little in the afternoon, so when the wind hit his face, he adjusted his sports jacket and put on the hood.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig account_

_-Are you ready for our first official tournament representing NYU?_ -Josh asked excitedly.

Ander grimaced but finally nodded. 

_-We'll be fine, you'll see. Besides, I'm sure with your volley we'll win without a problem..._ -Josh assured, mimicking the movement in the air as if he were holding a racquet.

_-Don't get too confident_. -Ander replied, although deep down, he also felt optimistic. He had practiced a lot these past few months and was aware that his play level was far superior to the rest of the team.

_"My father would be very proud of me if he saw me play now."_ -He reflected, flashing a faint smile.

When he played tennis, it was the only time all day when he could feel the closest thing to something resembling happiness. During those few hours, he was able to leave behind the sense of emptiness that had haunted him all the time since Omar had stopped being a part of his life. The problem was that when he finished playing, the memory of Omar invariably reappeared with greater force, making him feel miserable.

They were a couple of meters away from the van when his cell phone started ringing. He took it out of his jacket pocket and looked at the screen in puzzlement. It was an unknown number, so he answered, doubting a little.

_-Yes?_ -He muttered.

_-Ander..._

When he heard Keith's voice uttering his name on the other side of the line, he stopped short. Josh imitated him, stopping by his side while casting a questioning glance at him.

_-You? What do you want?_ -He spat out, feeling the heat rising up his cheeks because of the rage.

_-Look, I'm not very happy to call you either. But... it's about Omar._

*******

_-Ander..._

Ander forced himself to open his eyes to look at him. Keith was standing a couple of feet away from where he was sitting, and next to him, the rest of Omar's friends were keeping him company. They listened intently to a doctor who had just left the emergency room and talked to them.

When their glances met, Keith nodded to him almost imperceptibly to indicate to get closer. As he stood up and walked towards them, he began to repeat over and over again as if it were a mantra:

_"Please... Please... Please let Omar be okay."_ He took a deep breath, running his hand through his hair; he was literally shitting himself, and all he needed to know was that Omar was okay.

Ander reached out to the little semicircle they had formed and looked at the woman. She was a middle-aged doctor who was keeping a grim face, and her lips slightly pursed. When he saw her, he was transported back several years, when the doctor who was treating him at the time had diagnosed him with cancer. He quickly repressed that thought and concentrated on trying to understand what she was saying.

_-...He was in severe tachycardia, and while we were treating him, he developed a seizure, so we had to administer clonazepam._

Ander watched out of the corner of his eye as one of the girls sobbed while the guy she was with hugged her to comfort her. Ander remembered seeing them in Omar's apartment when he first arrived in New York but dismissed that thought when he heard the doctor again. 

_-It's a medicine that helps stop the seizure. Due to the drug's effect, the patient is currently sedated, so all that remains is to wait for him to wake up and rule out any neurological deficits..._

_-But then he will be okay?_ -Keith asked, clearly dismayed.

Ander put aside the distaste he felt at hearing him, and almost at the same time, asked, _"But why did this happen to him?"_

The doctor looked at them, first at Keith and then at Ander. And as if she were a mother comforting her children, she softened her expression before answering.

_-As I said before, we have to wait until he is conscious to practice an assessment. And the symptoms he presented were due to an overdose. In toxicological studies, we found large amounts of alcohol in the blood and a very high amount of cocaine._

Although Ander heard it, his brain refused to understand the meaning of her words. _"Overdose? Cocaine? What the fuck was she talking about?"_

When Keith called him a few hours earlier, he told him that he had found Omar unconscious in his apartment, that he had called 911, and was on his way to the hospital. At that point, Ander had no head to ask him anything else. He felt as if he would go crazy if anything bad happened to Omar. He couldn't think of anything but being there for him, so once Keith gave him the hospital's address, he had cut off communication. 

After receiving that news, his mind went blank. He could barely remember any of the later conversations he had with Josh. He remembered leaving his suitcase with him, telling him that he would find a way to get to the hotel once he was sure Omar was okay. 

_"Ander, are you sure? You know you couldn't only lose your place on the team, but also your scholarship...”_ -Josh had looked at him with a worried look.

_"I know Josh... I'm aware of it, but there's no way I'm getting in that van and leaving Omar alone..."_

Josh had merely nodded. His friend knew there would be no way to dissuade him, so he had called a cab to take him to the hospital and, hugging him, had gotten into the van. Ander had not had time to thank him, as his mind was in chaos, and he couldn't spin a single coherent thought at the time.

He remembered running into the reception to ask about Omar's health, but he had run into Keith on the way. Ander had not overlooked how bad he looked. He looked pale and anxious. He had had to make a superhuman effort to suppress the wave of jealousy that had invaded him, threatening him with losing control by imagining them together.

Deep down, he believed that Keith had been responsible for whatever was happening to Omar, but when Keith told him that he had found him lying on the floor of his apartment with a bottle of whisky beside him, the guilt he felt fell on him like a heavy burden. Somehow he felt that he was partly responsible for what was happening to Omar.

The doctor's words, along with several pairs of eyes looking at him, brought him back to the present. 

_-I'm sorry... -What did you say?_ -Ander mumbled, feeling awkward.

_-I asked if there is a relative to talk about his condition. This is because initially, only a family member can see him once we are sure he is out of danger._

Ander looked at Keith, afraid to hear that he would take over. But the confusion he experienced hearing his words left him puzzled.

_-Omar's parents live in Spain, but he is his boyfriend_. -Keith said, pointing to Ander.

The doctor nodded and focused her attention on Ander. 

_-This being so... I ask you to come with me to sign some papers. We will be monitoring his vital signs, but once he wakes up and we are sure he is out of danger, you will be able to go in and see him._

Ander was silent as he looked sideways at Keith. As soon as the doctor started to walk away, he just went after her while a dozen questions cluttered in his mind.

It was close to midnight when a nurse rushed out of the emergency room. When he saw her heading towards the waiting room, Ander stood up, trying to read her expression. He felt the fear in his mouth, and his hands were sweating profusely. He was sure that at any moment, he could have a nervous breakdown.

_-Ander Muñoz?_ -She asked, raising her voice.

He took two steps forward and nodded. 

_-Yes, it's me._ -He whispered, feeling like his heart would come out of his chest any minute.

_-Can you come with me? Dr. Kenner wants to talk to you._

*******


	34. Light and darkness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!  
> New chapter updated! I hope you like it.  
> xoxo 😘🖤

*******

It was close to midnight when a nurse rushed out of the emergency room. When he saw her heading towards the waiting room, Ander stood up, trying to read her expression. He felt the fear in his mouth, and his hands were sweating profusely. He was sure that at any moment, he could have a nervous breakdown.

_-Ander Muñoz?_ -She asked, raising her voice.

He took two steps forward and nodded. 

_-Yes, it's me._ -He whispered, feeling like his heart would come out of his chest any minute.

_-Can you come with me? Dr. Kenner wants to talk to you._

*******

**Chapter 34. Light and darkness**

**_(Ander)_ **

_-Ander, right?_

Ander nodded, clenching his jaw. He felt the fear in his throat and didn't think he could articulate a full sentence until he was sure Omar was out of danger. The doctor gestured for Ander to sit down in front of her and then looked at him.

_-Well, Ander, Omar has woken up, and after a physical examination of his nervous system, everything seems to indicate that he is not in any danger._

Listening to her, he let out the air he had been holding in without realizing it and, taking his hands to his face, rubbed his eyelids to avoid shedding the tears of relief that threatened to come out.

_-However, despite being conscious and oriented in time and space, he seems to have transitory global amnesia._

_-What does it mean?_

_-Omar doesn't remember anything that happened in the last few hours. He doesn't remember drinking or taking drugs, and when he found himself in a hospital bed without understanding why he began to experience an anxiety crisis. For that reason, we had to give him an anxiolytic, and now he is sleeping._

_-But is that normal?_ -While listening to her, an alarm began to sound in his brain.

_-It's rare, but sometimes it can happen because of a seizure or hitting the head when he lost consciousness. Or, less commonly, it can occur in patients who have suffered a traumatic event, and their brain unconsciously blocks it out._

_-I get it..._ -Ander mumbled, though he wasn't really sure he understood it at all.

_-It will most likely be something transitory, and over the course of the next few hours, his brain will begin to remember._

_-I see..._ -He muttered, feeling a little more relieved.

_-You can go in and see him; he's still asleep but will most likely wake up soon. I only ask that you do not mention anything to him about what happened, nor try to make him remember because you could trigger a nervous breakdown. We must wait until he himself begins to remember what happened. Do you have any questions?_ -She asked, looking patiently at him.

Ander shook his head in denial before standing up.

_-So can I see him now?_

_-Yes, I'll come with you_. -She declared, getting up from her desk.

*******

Fatigue began to take its toll on him by making him doze at times, so he suppressed a yawn, got up from the chair, and began to walk around the room to stretch his legs. He massaged his neck by moving it back and forth, trying to decrease the accumulated tension he felt in the muscles of his back and shoulders. He looked at his watch and grimaced as he saw that it was two o'clock in the morning.

Ander had been sitting for about half an hour waiting for Omar to wake up but saw no sign of this happening soon. Omar was breathing steadily, and as he watched him, Josh's words echoed in his head. He wasn't sure if he would make it in time for the competition and didn't want to imagine the coach's reaction if this happened, but he simply couldn't leave without first talking to Omar and making sure he was okay. 

Even though the doctor had said that everything seemed fine with him, he couldn't get what Omar had done out of his head. He had many questions he would like to clear up with him, but after the doctor's warning, Ander knew he couldn't do it. At least not now. He would have to wait for Omar to start remembering on his own, and when that happened, Ander would not keep quiet. 

Now that the danger seemed to have passed, the fear he had experienced began to slowly turn into anger. Not only because of the memories of what had happened between them a couple of months ago but now, in addition to that, he was so angry that Omar had put his life at risk. As much as he thought about it, there was no way he could justify what Omar had done.

He was upset about a lot of things, and Keith finding Omar was one of them. And the more he thought about it, the more doubts that popped up inside his head. He kept wondering how Keith got into Omar's apartment. _"Would Omar have given him a key too?"_

_-Coño!!!_ -He mumbled, trying to suppress the jealousy. 

Another wrong thing was Keith's attitude. First, calling him to tell him what happened, and second, telling the doctor that Ander was Omar's boyfriend. He didn't understand why he had done that, but he hoped to find out soon.

A muffled groan made him look in the direction of the bed. Omar was waking up, and suddenly, Ander didn't know what to do. He felt nervous because he had no idea how Omar would react to seeing him there beside him. After all, it had been two months since they had last spoken, and they certainly had not met on good terms. Maybe Omar wouldn't want to see him and would kick him out. He would ask about Keith, and if that happened, it would only confirm what Ander thought he knew.

Omar opened his eyes and slowly sat, leaning on his elbows. He first looked at the IV in the back of his hand and then focused all his attention on him. For a couple of seconds, when their gazes met, Ander experienced a flip in his stomach and felt his pulse racing as he saw Omar's lips curl into a weak smile.

_-Hey... How do you feel?_ -Ander questioned him, breaking the silence, slowly approaching Omar until he was at the foot of the bed.

_-As if a truck had run over me..._ -He muttered, bringing his free hand to his head.

_"It's no wonder after what you did,"_ -He thought ironically. 

Instead, he just pursed his lips and nodded slightly. He cleared his throat, thinking about how to ask the next question because, according to the doctor, he had to be very careful.

_-Do you remember anything?_

Omar shook his head and looked down. 

_-What happened?_ -He asked in a hoarse voice _. -Please tell me..._

From the way Omar watched him, Ander knew he was telling the truth. Omar had no fucking clue what had happened, much less the big scare he had given not only to him but to "his friends" as well. He pursed his lips, trying to smile and, by inertia, rested his hand on one of Omar's calves.

_-Don't worry. That's not important now. What is important is that you are okay and that you will gradually remember what happened._

Both of them remained silent for several seconds. Ander had no idea what was going on in Omar's head, but he knew that this was neither the place nor the time to talk about anything else. He took a deep breath and looked down at the floor. Omar was out of danger, and he didn't remember anything, so his presence was out of the question. There was nothing else to talk about. He was about to tell him that he was leaving when he heard Omar call out to him.

_-Ander?_

_-Hmmm?_ -He hummed, looking up at him.

_-Are you mad at me? Did I do something wrong, nene?_

For several seconds Ander held Omar's gaze, trying to understand what he meant.

_-What?_ -He managed to mumble.

_-I don't know how I got here, but it would seem that you are angry with me from your face._

Ander felt a chill run down his spine. Omar's words didn't make sense; it seemed as if he not only didn't remember why he ended up in the emergency room but also didn't seem to remember what had happened between them two months earlier.

He sat down on the edge of the bed, and cautiously asked him:

_-Tell me something, what is the last thing you remember?_

Omar closed his eyes for a moment as if he were making a great effort to do so. After about ten seconds, Ander saw him open his eyes and smile shyly.

_-I remember giving you the keys to my apartment and asking you to leave the college dorms and move in with me..._

Ander raised his eyebrows in disbelief, giving thanks mentally to be seated because otherwise, he was sure he would have lost his balance.

_-And you still haven't given me an answer..._ -Concluded Omar looking away from him to focus on fidgeting with the sheets.

_-Omar..._ -He whispered and then was silent again. 

_"What was I supposed to answer?_ -He thought, racking his brain. This was wrong—a lot. Not only did Omar not remember anything, but he had a nonexistent story in his head. He needed to get out of there and find the doctor right away.

He was about to get up when he felt Omar interlace his fingers with his own. As soon as he felt the warm touch of Omar's hand against his skin, his body reacted by shaking unexpectedly.

_-What's going on, Ander? You're scaring me... Why am I here? Tell me the truth._

Ander saw Omar's face begin to change due to the panic, and when he felt his hand being squeezed harder, he knew that he should try to calm him down.

_-Hey... Omar. Look at me; it's okay. Why don't you let me get the doctor?_ -He managed to answer because he felt that at any moment he would lose control too.

_-Vale..._ -He listened weakly to Omar's answer. 

Ander let out a sigh and nodded weakly as he stood up. 

_-I'll be right back._

_-Ander?_

_-Hmm?_

Ander looked at him and what he saw was fear in Omar's eyes. Without thinking, he went over to him and hugged him tightly. Even he was not aware of how much he needed that hug until he held Omar in his arms. They stayed like that for a while until he finally let him go and stood up.

*******

Ander was sitting in the back of the room, listening carefully to the doctor's questions to Omar. Little by little, Omar began to look more serene until he finally closed his eyes. Ander did not know if Omar had fallen asleep or was resting, but the doctor's voice let him know that Omar was still awake.

_-Omar, I need to talk to your boyfriend for a moment, okay?_

Ander saw him curl the corner of his mouth briefly and nod in response.

_-Ander, would you come outside for a moment, please?_

Ander continued to look at Omar sideways before leaving.

When the two went out into the hallway, Dr. Kenner made a serious gesture. He was so focused on her that he didn't notice when Keith came to his side. 

_-How is Omar doing?_ -He asked, looking at them.

_-As I was telling Ander earlier, Omar has transitory global amnesia. It's a sudden, temporary episode of memory loss, which means that the memory of recent events simply disappears. That's why Omar can't remember how or why he got here._

_-He really doesn't remember anything?_ -Keith mumbled, opening his eyes in disbelief.

Ander was silent. It was one thing for Omar not to remember recent events and quite another for him not to remember that they had been separated for two months. And it was much worse that Omar remembered things that had never happened. 

_-Omar can remember who he is and identify the people he knows well._ -The doctor explained, looking at Ander. 

_-Episodes of transitory global amnesia always get better gradually within a few hours, so we have to wait. It's not serious, although I must admit it can be frightening for the patient. For that reason, and spare Omar unnecessary trauma, I ask you not to contradict him or try to make him remember._

_-But doctor..._ -Ander intervened.

_-Trust me. We just have to wait for him to recover on his own. You must not worry._

_-And if he doesn't?_ -Ander didn't know what to think.

_-The memory should gradually come back; usually, these episodes do not last more than twenty-four hours. If we don't see any improvement at that time, we will have to look for other causes, such as the seizure he suffered... in that case, the recovery could take longer._

When the doctor left, both of them remained silent. Ander snorted and spat out:

_-Omar not only doesn't remember how he got here... He also doesn't remember what happened in his apartment two months ago..._ -Ander looked at Keith and couldn't hide his frustration.

_-Are you fucking kidding me?_ -Keith looked at him in amazement.

Ander shook his head before speaking again.

_-I must go. I guess... you'll stay with him?_

_-Sure. I couldn't leave him alone._ -Keith nodded.

_-Okay... anyway, you heard what the doctor said. I'm sure he'll remember everything tomorrow, and it'll be good for him if you're with him._

For a moment, he wished it wasn't so and that the movie Omar had made in his head was real. For a brief moment, he wished with all his might that Omar had not cheated him about Keith and that they could live together as Omar had imagined. But he knew it was impossible and that in a few hours, the memories would come back to him, and Ander didn't want to be there when that happened.

_-I'll go in and say goodbye, and then you can stay with him_. -He muttered, turning around.

Ander couldn't believe he was saying that. As much as he hated the relationship, Omar had with Keith, Omar's emotional well-being at that time was much more important. So he had to let go of the jealousy and pain he was feeling for Omar's sake. Because once Omar got his memory back, Ander couldn't bear Omar put his life in danger again like he had done that night.

_-Ah..._ -Ander stopped to look at Keith one more time _. -Thank you for calling me... I know you didn't have to, but you did, and I appreciate it._

Keith didn't say anything. He just nodded and watched him return to his friends.

Before he went back into the room, he pulled out his cell phone and saw that he had several messages from Josh. He texted him that everything was fine and that he was about to leave the hospital to catch up with him at the hotel.

When he opened the door, he thought he would find Omar asleep, but he was wrong. Omar looked lost and sad, which made Ander try to cheer him up. When he approached him, he smiled, and Omar's face automatically lit up.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig account_

_-Hey... How do you feel?_ -He muttered.

- _Better, I think. My head doesn't hurt anymore_. -He answered with a smile.

_-That's a good sign. The doctor says you'll be as good as new tomorrow, and probably they will discharge you on Sunday._

- _Oh yeah? That's good; I want us to go home..._

Ander felt tightness in his chest when he heard Omar but tried to restrain himself.

_-Omar... I must go._

As soon as he finished the sentence, he saw Omar's face decompose, although he tried to hide it.

_-Probably you don't remember, but tomorrow I have my first tournament. It's in New Jersey, and if I don't leave now, I won't make it in time._

_-Really? How could I forget?_ -Murmured clearly dejected. - _You don't know how much I would have liked to accompany you, nene..._

Ander forced himself to smile as he listened to him.

_-I know, but there'll be another chance for you to do it._ -He lied.

_-You're right. I'll be looking forward to seeing you win_. -He whispered, looking down _. -Will you come over on Sunday so we can go home together?_

Ander swallowed when he heard him. He knew that Omar would have remembered everything that had happened by then, so he just nodded. 

_-Call me, okay?_ -And looking at him sideways, to see his reaction, he continued. - _Either way, Keith will be here to keep you company._

_-Is Keith here?_ -Omar asked with a smile.

_-Aha..._ -Ander hummed, trying not to show him how much it hurt to see his reaction.

- _That's good... although it's not the same._

_-Well, I have to go. Try to get some rest, okay?_ -He smiled and headed for the exit. 

He hadn't gone two meters when he heard Omar again.

_-You're leaving like this?_ -His voice was disappointed.

_-What do you mean?_ -He forced himself to ask, although he already knew the answer.

- _Don't you kiss me?_ -Omar pouted as he said it.

Ander stood still for a few seconds, not knowing what to do. He remembered the doctor's words again and walked over to him.

_-I'm sorry... I think I don't know where my head is._ -He mumbled.

He sat down on the edge of the bed and ran his tongue down his bottom lip in a reflex action. He slowly lowered his head to close the space between them and brushed Omar's lips briefly. He was about to stand up when he felt Omar grab him by the neck to keep him from walking away and started kissing him slowly. As soon as he felt Omar's tongue slip between his lips, a groan escaped from his throat without him being able to contain it.

In a matter of seconds, Omar stroked his jaw as he continued to kiss him as if he hadn't kissed him in a long time. And at that moment, as if Ander had also lost his memory, he kissed him back with the same intensity, enjoying the incredible sensation that Omar's lips provoked in him. 

He had come home, if only for one last time.

*******


	35. Decisions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Chapter 35 is here!
> 
> Hope you like it!  
> xoxo 😙

*******

He sat down on the edge of the bed and ran his tongue down his bottom lip in a reflex action. He slowly lowered his head to close the space between them and brushed Omar's lips briefly. He was about to stand up when he felt Omar grab him by the neck to keep him from walking away and started kissing him slowly. As soon as he felt Omar's tongue slip between his lips, a groan escaped from his throat without him being able to contain it.

In a matter of seconds, Omar stroked his jaw as he continued to kiss him as if he hadn't kissed him in a long time. And at that moment, as if Ander had also lost his memory, he kissed him back with the same intensity, enjoying the incredible sensation that Omar's lips provoked in him. 

He had come home, if only for one last time.

*******

**Chapter 35. Decisions**

**_(Omar)_ **

****

Omar perceived the unmistakable salty taste of the tears mixing with the softness of Ander's lips. Confused, he parted enough to look at him and what he saw left him puzzled. Silent tears rolled down Ander's cheeks, and at the same time, his countenance denoted a deep sadness. As soon as Ander made eye contact with him, he ran his hand through his face to wipe the tears while he looked away.

_-Hey... What's wrong with you?_ -Omar whispered, grabbing him by the chin to force him to look into his eyes.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

In response, Ander shook his head, freeing himself from his grip.

_-It's nothing..._ -He muttered.

_-What do you mean it's nothing? You're crying..._ -He insisted on holding him by the shoulder to keep him from walking away.

The fact that he couldn't remember why he had gotten to the emergency room was pretty screwed up, and if he added to the fact that Ander was behaving strangely, it only made him more anxious. Something was wrong... but he couldn't figure out what.

_-I love you..._ -He whispered so quietly that for a moment, Omar thought he had imagined it. 

Suddenly a frightening idea began to take shape in his head, making him shudder. The fear he experienced made him swallow before he spoke.

_-Ander... Is there something wrong with me? Is that it? I have a disease, and you don't want to tell me?_

_-What?_ -Ander looked up at him. _-What are you saying? Of course not!_ -He denied vehemently.

_-Then what's wrong with you?_ -He pushed. _-It's not often that you behave like this... I mean, I know you love me, but you said it as if I would be dying or as if you knew we would never see each other again... Not to mention that you cried while we were kissing..._

He noticed how Ander's body tensed up at his statement. Ander looked at him sideways and clenched his jaw. Seconds later, he saw him slowly exhale the air before he spoke.

_-It's just that... you scared the shit out of me, jodeeer! You know I hate hospitals and the fact that I have to leave you here... I don't know… I guess it was too much._

_-Although... there's something I'd like to ask you..._

_-What is it?_ -Omar mumbled, looking at him.

_-Promise me that no matter what happens, you will take care of yourself._

_-I don't get it... Why are you telling me this? What could happen?_

Ander remained silent for a few seconds until he finally mumbled:

_-I don't know Omar... Maybe I'm talking nonsense... Forget it, okay?_

_-If you say so..._ -He murmured, still not fully understanding his behavior. 

They remained silent for a few seconds until finally, Omar confessed to him:

_-You know I can't stop thinking about why I lost consciousness? According to the doctors, there is nothing wrong with my brain, but then why did I have seizures? And why can't I remember?_ -He murmured with a hint of bitterness.

_-It could have happened to anyone._ -Omar noticed the hesitation in Ander's voice. _-You heard the doctor. You must not worry or force your brain; little by little, you will begin to remember..._

_-Yes, yes... I have already been told._ -He moaned reluctantly.

_-And then? Concentrate on recovering._

_-Do I have another option?_

As soon as he finished the sentence, he regretted it. Ander wasn't to blame for what was happening to him, and he didn't have to take it out on him, so, changing his expression, he mumbled:

_-Hey, thanks..._

_-Why?_ -Ander asked, raising an eyebrow.

_-For caring about me._

_-I'm always going to worry about you. Regardless of..._ -Ander was silent and then only added, - _Always, Omar... Always._

_-So do I..._ -Omar smiled as he heard him. He couldn't help but feel his heart bumping when he heard Ander speak like that.

_-Omar..._

_\- Hmm?_ -He hummed, suppressing a yawn.

Omar had the feeling that his boyfriend was fighting an inner battle, and although he had no idea what it was about, he didn't want to pressure him. He knew him well enough to know that Ander would tell him whatever was going on once he felt ready to do so. As Omar watched him, he thought he saw the exact moment when Ander made a decision, but before Ander could speak, someone knocked on the door a couple of times and then opened it right away.

Keith poked his head out and smiled at him.

_-Sorry for the intrusion. But Jules, Matt, and the others are leaving and want to see you before they go..._ -He muttered, looking first at Omar and then at Ander.

Omar smiled back at him while Ander had an indecipherable expression on his face.

_-Hey... Is everyone here?_ -Omar greeted him, grateful to know that his friends cared about him.

_-Of course, we are all here... We couldn't leave our favorite Spanish guy alone..._ -He joked.

Omar watched Ander force the corners of his mouth in a fail attempt to draw a smile.

_-I'm leaving. Take care, Omar_. -Ander muttered with a tired gesture.

Although he was happy to see Keith, he wished he hadn't interrupted them, not only so he could hear what Ander had been about to say but also to kiss him once more. He knew that Ander was not given to displays of affection in front of others, so he nodded resignedly.

He saw Ander take his jacket and walk towards the door. When he was near Keith, he stopped for a moment as if hesitating to say something but finally left the room without saying a word.

*******

Seeing his friends, even for a moment, made him feel better. When they left, Keith accompanied them to the car and minutes later returned to the room. He entered with a coffee he had bought from one of the vending machines and took a seat next to him. Even though Omar had insisted that he didn't have to stay with him for the rest of the night, he hadn't been able to change Keith's mind.

_-You, asshole! You scared the shit out of us. But I'm glad to know that you're okay now and that you'll most likely be discharged soon._ -Keith said as he stretched his legs.

_-Yeah, so they say. Hey... Do you know how I got here?_

Keith shuffled uncomfortably on the reclining couch and taking one hand on the back of his neck, he mumbled: 

_-I found you... But... uh... let's talk about it another time, okay? The doctors say you should remember that on your own._

Hearing this, Omar snorted. It looked like he wouldn't get a word out of Keith either, so he finally gave up.

_-Now let's try to get some sleep, okay?_

*******

_-Omar! Hey, wake up!_

A gentle but firm shake made him open his eyes. The whitish light from one of the lamps helped him focus Keith. His friend had dark circles under his eyes and was looking at him with a worried look.

_-What the fuck...?_ -He mused, wiping away his tears.

_-Are you all right?_

_-Yes, I think so. I just had a nightmare_. -Omar muttered, still confused.

Keith brought him a glass of water and sat down again, staring at him with his eyes closed. 

_-You were screaming Ander's name..._

Omar could remember the nightmare perfectly, and it felt so real even when he was awake that he couldn't help but shudder.

_-I dreamt that I was in Ander's room in the university dorms... He... he was furious and told me that he didn't want to be with me anymore. In the dream, I tried to talk some sense into him, but he just refused to listen to me..._ -He closed his eyes trying to erase the image from his mind, but that was useless, so he continued in a shallow voice: _-Ander said that I had cheated on him with you..._

Keith looked at him silently for several seconds, and Omar seemed to see a hint of surprise in his eyes. 

_-It was just a bad dream, Omar. Take it easy, okay?_

Omar nodded and closed his eyes. He knew Keith was right; it was just a bad dream, but he wasn't able to get rid of that unpleasant feeling that came over him for some strange reason.

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_-Coñooo!_ -He hissed when he missed another volley that was not too complicated.

He was playing disastrously and knew perfectly well why. It had been quite a challenge to get to the hotel, and when he finally managed to make it, the clock was ticking at about four o'clock in the morning. So, sleeping alone for a couple of hours was taking its toll. Of course, his poor play level was due to lack of sleep and because he couldn't get Omar out of his head.

When Omar kissed him, all his willpower had been shattered. As he felt Omar's tongue explore his mouth, caressing him in that unique way, exercising that power he had over him, he made all the memories of their life together come flooding back to him. And the certainty that none of it would ever be the same again was enough to make him unable to hold back his tears. He knew Omar had betrayed him, but even the jealousy and pain he felt had not helped him to stand his ground. And for Omar to believe that everything was flowing beautifully between them only made everything much more painful.

_-For God's sake Ander, focus!_ -Josh scolded him, coming closer to him.

Ander nodded and muttered, _"a sorry,"_ tried to concentrate on the game.

They finally won the game with much effort, but he knew perfectly well that his performance had been deplorable. So, he wasn't surprised when, in the locker room, the coach caught his eye. 

_-What's wrong with you, ah? You played worse than an amateur..._

_-I had a bad day, Coach. I'm sorry, it won't happen again._

_-I hope so. Don't make me think I was wrong about you..._ -He murmured disapprovingly before leaving.

Ander looked down and saw Josh looking at him out of the corner of his eye. The coach's scolding reminded him of his father when playing was an obligation and not something he enjoyed doing several years ago.

_-What time did you arrive last night?_ -Josh sat down next to him, running his hand behind Ander's back.

_-Late..._

_-And how is he? I guess that's why you're fucked up..._

Ander was silent. He didn't want to talk about it with Josh or anyone else. He found what was happening too painful and didn't know how to deal with Omar's amnesia's feelings. During the few hours he was with Omar the night before, his mood changed so much that it seemed like he was riding an emotional roller coaster. 

From the anguish of not knowing how Omar was doing to the disbelief of realizing that Omar could not remember anything about what happened between them, to the jealousy and pain of seeing that even with his distorted memory, he was still smiling like a fool when Keith was around.

_"Our favorite Spanish guy..."_ -Keith had said to refer to Omar. Those words kept echoing in his brain over and over again. And every time he remembered it, he felt the bile churning in his stomach. He had wanted to punch Keith, but he had been rational enough to hold back because he knew it would only make the situation worse.

_-Ander?_

He had forgotten that Josh was patiently waiting for his answer, so by softening his expression, he changed the subject.

_-I don't want to talk about it... It's complicated_. -He finally answered, looking at Josh. 

_-Come on, let's get out of here. The van is waiting for us to come back to campus. When we get there, let's go somewhere to eat. My treat... as compensation for almost screwing up..._ -Ander grinned.

*******

They entered an Irish pub that was a few blocks from the university. They ordered something to eat and a couple of beers. The background music was nice, and because it was Sunday, there were relatively few people. As time went on and he still didn't hear from Omar, his mood worsened to the same extent. He knew that Omar was fine; otherwise, Keith would have called him. So that silence could only mean one thing. Omar had regained his memory, and everything was back to where it was before. 

And although deep down Ander knew that would happen, he had to admit that he wasn't ready to face it. The pair of beers became four and then eight. He wanted to forget about Omar, about Keith, and about the pain and anger that this whole thing was causing him. As he drank, he felt the alcohol slowly going to his head, clouding his judgment, but he couldn't care less.

_-Life is a big son of a bitch..._ -Ander dragged his words, bumping his drink against Josh's. _-Let's toast to that..._

Josh laughed when he heard him and imitated him, lifting his beer mug. His cheeks were flushed, and his eyes were glazed over, and from the way he looked at him, Ander knew he was as drunk or more than he was.

_-Are you like this because this guy broke your heart?_

Ander looked at him and shrugged, trying to focus on Josh. 

_-If at the end Omar wants to be with him... I don't care_. -He hissed as he raised his hand to call the waiter.

When he turned his attention back to Josh, he was already much closer to him. Ander could feel his breath brushing against his face, but he did nothing to avoid the closeness. Instead, he fixed his attention on Josh's lips and smiled. It would be very easy to close his eyes and let things happen. Maybe that's what he needed to get Omar out of his head once and for all.

_-Why are you looking at me like that, Ander?_

_-How?_

_-As if you wanted to kiss me.._. -Josh whispered, getting a little closer.

_-You wish..._

_-Are you sure?_ -He challenged him.

Their faces were a few millimeters apart, and before Ander could realize what was happening, Josh grabbed him by the collar and pulled him in. It was a brief kiss, but hot enough to leave him wanting more. When he opened his eyes, Josh was staring at him, curling his lips into a seductive smile.

_-Do you want us to ask for the check?_

_-Aha..._ -Ander nodded, knowing what that innocent question implied.

It was about six o'clock in the afternoon when they arrived on campus. Even with the alcohol's effects, he knew he was making a mistake and would regret getting laid with Josh, but he quieted that feeling at the thought of Omar fucking Keith. They were about to arrive in his room when he received a message from Tom.

**_[ Ander, could you get there a little later? Let's just say I'm still busy... 😈But I swear we're not in your bed😅]_ **

_-Shit..._ -He reluctantly said, expelling the air. 

He looked at Josh and showed him the message Tom had sent him.

_-That's it, we can't go to your room because this asshole is there fucking like a rabbit... and mine is busy too..._

Ander stopped in the middle of the corridor and looked at him. When their eyes met, he knew he didn't want to do this. Josh was a good-looking guy, and it would be easy to do so, but it wasn't right. It wasn't the time, it wasn't the place, and honestly, he wasn't the guy he was looking forward to fucking.

_-Let's leave it..._

_-What? Are you serious? Let's find another place... we can go to my car..._

_-Josh, I like you, but we're drunk, and I don't think it's a good idea... tomorrow we'll regret it if we do. I'll see you later, okay?_

He didn't wait for him to answer. He turned around and started walking in the opposite direction. He needed to get some fresh air and clear his mind. He walked for about ten minutes without a fixed direction until he stopped in front of a wooden bench. He dropped his backpack and plumped down to the side. It seemed that the effect of the alcohol was wearing off because he could now see much more clearly the monumental mistake he had been about to make.

If he really wanted to start over and try it with Josh or any other guy, he first had to close his cycle with Omar completely. He deserved it, and Omar deserved it too. He needed to forgive him and himself for the mistakes they had both made throughout their relationship. They had been through so much together; they had lived through so many extraordinary and quite painful things too, that the least they could do was end their relationship like the two adults they now were. And then once they did, he could move on. 

He was sure that Omar had regained his memory, and for no reason would he allow him to risk his life again as he had done, so it was the perfect time to have an open and honest conversation with him. With that thought fixed in his head, he stood up and started walking.

He was leaving campus when his cell phone started ringing. His stomach turned when he read Keith's name on the screen.

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I rewrote this chapter several times because I wasn't sure which of the two options I had in mind was the best.  
> In the end, I decided to leave it pending for the next chapter. So much will depend on the comments I receive to make a decision.  
> Thank you as always for reading, commenting, and/or leaving a Kudo.
> 
> xoxo


	36. Please, hold on

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, chapter 36 is up.  
> Hope you like it!  
> As always, thanks for your comments; they make my day!
> 
> xoxo

*******

If he really wanted to start over and try it with Josh or any other guy, he first had to close his cycle with Omar completely. He deserved it, and Omar deserved it too. He needed to forgive him and himself for the mistakes they had both made throughout their relationship. They had been through so much together; they had lived through so many extraordinary and quite painful things too, that the least they could do was end their relationship like the two adults they now were. And then once they did, he could move on. 

He was sure that Omar had regained his memory, and for no reason would he allow him to risk his life again as he had done, so it was the perfect time to have an open and honest conversation with him. With that thought fixed in his head, he stood up and started walking.

He was leaving campus when his cell phone started ringing. His stomach turned when he read Keith's name on the screen.

*******

**Chapter 36. Please, hold on**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_-Is something wrong with Omar?_ -He hissed, feeling the fear in the pit of his stomach.

_-Ander, I'm fine... My phone ran out of battery, and Keith lent me his phone to call you._ -He heard Omar's warm voice.

Ander took a deep breath as a sign of relief. Once his heartbeat returned to a more or less normal rhythm, he began to assimilate Omar's words. He still didn't remember...

_-Hey... How are you? Are you feeling better?_ -He asked almost in a whisper.

_-I haven't fainted or had a seizure anymore, so I guess that's a good sign. However, I need to come back in a couple of days for a checkup._

_-Ah... I see. That's good news._

_-And well, I called you because I wanted to know if you were back yet._

_"Jodeeer..."_ -Ander closed his eyes, trying to think. 

_-... And ask you if you plan to come... I miss you..._

Ander remained silent as he listened to Omar's breathing from the other side of the line.

_-Ander?_ -Omar insisted. - _Although if you're still far away, Keith has offered to walk me home..._ \- His voice sounded a bit hesitant at the end.

_"Keith... of course... Who else?"_ -He thought bitterly. 

After listening to Omar, it took him only a few seconds to make up his mind. A voice inside him told him that he should make up any excuse not to go, but silencing that voice, he muttered:

_-I could be there in thirty minutes. I don't know if you can wait for me or if you prefer to meet me later..._

_-Are you kidding? I can't wait for you to tell me how it went... I'll be waiting for you. Don't be late._

Ander put his cell phone away and breathed a sigh. It seemed that after all, that talk between them would have to wait a little longer. 

*******

When he arrived at the hospital and entered the spacious lobby, he began to slow down until he stopped completely. As he looked at the people who were wandering around him with a worried look, he began to falter.

_"Was he really prepared to keep pretending that everything was fine between them just for Omar's sake? For how long could he do it without the jealousy and insecurity that flowed inside him explode and send everything to hell?"_

The answer to all his doubts came as a slap in the face as he remembered the horror he experienced when he learned that Omar was in an ambulance on his way to the hospital. And all those hours that followed, with no news of his health, had only driven him to the brink of paranoia. During those frightening moments, his mind played against him, feeling that he would go crazy if something serious happened to Omar. Just imagining it, he had felt everything stop around him. He had not been able to bear the thought of living in a world where Omar did not exist.

_-Ander? Is everything okay?_

Ander blinked briefly as he recognized Dr. Kenner in front of him.

_-Hello... Yes, I'm here because Omar told me that he had been discharged._

_-That's right. Actually, I'm going to see him right now. I need him to sign some documents before he leaves. He's evolved satisfactorily, although his memory hasn't returned yet. That's why I need to check him in a couple of days. Are you coming?_ -She asked and immediately started walking.

_-Yes, that's what he told me... And, doctor... when will he remember again?_ -Ander asked worriedly as he walked down the wide corridor beside her.

_-We don't know for sure. The brain tends to react in a very peculiar way to protect itself. His subconscious may be trying to block out certain painful episodes that led him to act the way he did._

The doctor stopped in front of the door of Omar's room, and turning to Ander, she muttered: 

_-Give him time; now what Omar needs is to feel the support of the people who love him. And you, as his boyfriend, should be very attentive to any signs of depression or anxiety you might detect._

At this point, Ander couldn't tell her that not only were he and Omar not boyfriends, but they had ended on terrible terms, so he just nodded. They were about to enter when the doctor received a call, and from the look on her face, it seemed like something serious.

_-Oh, sorry, Ander, I'll be back in a few minutes... Please tell Omar I'll be right back_. -And without further ado, she ran down the hall.

As he watched her walk away, Ander thought about how demanding the life of an emergency physician could be and was happy to think that he wouldn't have to be there much longer. He knocked on the door a couple of times, and without waiting for an answer, he walked in.

The first thing he saw was Omar sitting on the bed with his feet swinging and Keith beside him chatting animatedly. He was no longer wearing the blue hospital gown but was dressed in tennis shoes, dark sweatpants, and a black sweatshirt.

As soon as Omar saw him, a soft smile spread across his face, but before he could say anything, Ander stepped forward.

_-Hey... You look much better._ -He mumbled, not daring to come any closer. And looking at Keith, he shook his head almost imperceptibly in greeting.

- _Yes... Well... I feel better, although what I want is to go home now_.

_-Ah... About that... I ran into Dr. Kenner on the way here. She had some documents that you have to sign before you leave, but apparently, something came up, so we have to wait for her..._

_-Really? Pfff... Well, I guess we'll have to wait._ -Omar complained, lifting his shoulders.

Ander sat down on one of the chairs at the opposite end and crossed his arms. For a few seconds, none of the three said anything, making the situation much more uncomfortable than it already was. He looked around, thinking of some neutral conversation topic when he noticed Omar's clothes again.

_-You've already changed your clothes..._ -He muttered, regretting it immediately. His comment was so obvious that he felt stupid for mentioning it.

_-Very observant..._ -The mocking tone in Keith's voice, along with the way he raised an eyebrow, made Ander want to punch him. He was about to answer him when Omar intervened.

_-Keith did me the favor of going to my apartment to get some clothes... Apparently, I wasn't wearing much clothing when I got here..._

_-Ah, of course... Always so helpful, right?_ -Ander looked at Keith sideways, unable to stop himself this time. It seemed that all the problems that surrounded Omar, Keith was there to solve.

_-Ander..._ -The way Omar uttered his name only made him angrier. It was as if Omar disapproved of his comment and didn't realize the ironic tone Keith had used in addressing him. 

Apparently, Omar had lost not only his memory but also his common sense. He had no idea what was going through his mind, but at least for him, it was clear that everything Keith did was perfect for Omar.

At that moment, the door opened, and he no longer had time to respond. Dr. Kenner walked into the room and smiled, completely oblivious to the tension hanging over them.

_-Sorry for the delay_. -She apologized and immediately turned to Omar. _-Ready to go, Omar? I just need you to sign these documents to conclude the discharge, but, anyway, remember that in two days, you will have to come in for a check-up, okay?_

_-While Omar signs the documents, could we talk outside for a moment, Ander?_ -Keith looked at him and jumped off the bed to head for the exit.

Ander felt his blood boil, and without looking at Omar to see his reaction, he followed Keith, closing the door behind him more tightly than necessary.

_-What the fuck is wrong with you, huh?_ -Keith hissed quietly, reaching out to him. His face a few inches away from Ander's.

_-No. What the fuck are you up to? You look like Omar's fucking shadow_. -Ander snarled, unable to contain the wave of jealousy that swept through him.

_-And? Don't forget you're not his boyfriend anymore. And just so you know... I didn't just go to get clothes; I also went to clean up the mess in his apartment, so he wouldn't see it once he got back._ -He added in a challenging way.

_-I may not be his boyfriend, but that could change at any time... If I wanted to... -_ He fought back, holding his gaze and trying to modulate the tone of his voice when he realized they were starting to attract attention.

_-Look, asshole... If I called you, unfortunately, was because Omar doesn't have any family living here in the United States, and you were the closest thing to that. During these days, I've tried to stay equanimous because of him, and even more so because he doesn't remember shit... But you and I, we do have a good memory..._

Keith pointed at him with his index finger, and immediately Ander slapped Keith's hand to prevent him from pointing him further. Keith smiled sarcastically and didn't flinch.

_-Do I need to tell you that what happened to Omar is your fault?_

_-What are you talking about, asshole?_ \- Ander clenched his jaw as he heard him, taking a step back.

_-Omar has been a mess ever since that day you found us in his apartment... And you didn't know about it... or you just didn't care. You decided not to listen to him and let him sink into his misery... Well, now I'm the one who's going to tell you how things are._ -Keith hissed as the color rose to his cheeks in anger.

_-Omar and I fucked... yes, but he never cheated on you because you weren't together when that happened. And if you can't deal with that, you better get out of here right now, so you don't hurt him anymore. He thinks he needs you, but he doesn't... I can be with him and support him as he recovers his memory and after that happens... I'll be there for him too._

_-Fuck off, asshole!_ -Ander ground his teeth, pushing his forehead against his. - _You're nobody to tell me whether I should be with him or not. You think you know him, but you don't. You don't have a fucking clue what Omar and I have been through... so save your cheap talk and let me through._ -Ander walked into the room, bumping his shoulder hard against Keith's, feeling the anger emanating from his body, making him shake.

At that moment, the door opened, and the doctor came out with Omar.

_-Ah... here they are._ -She nodded.

_-I'll See you the day after tomorrow at six o'clock, don't forget, ok?_ -She said to Omar, putting a hand on his shoulder, and nodding, she hurried away.

_-What's going on between you two?_ -Omar asked, puzzled.

_-What do you mean? Nothing_... -Ander replied, trying to stay calm. _-Shall we go?_

Omar raised an eyebrow as he nodded unconvincingly. - _Yes, let's get out of here. Keith, will you join us?_

Ander rolled his eyes, although Omar didn't see him because his attention was focused on the other guy. Keith smiled, amused but shook his head.

_-Thank you, Omar, but I have to go. Anyway, I'll call you tomorrow to see how you're doing. Ah! I almost forgot..._ -He muttered, reaching into his pocket. Seconds later, he pulled out a padlock-shaped key ring that Ander recognized perfectly. _-Your key._

_-Thank you._ -Omar extended his hand to take it. _-And thanks again for bringing me some clothes... We'll talk later, then._ -Omar walked up to Keith and gave him a half hug. Keith turned around to leave, but not before giving Ander a threatening look.

When they left the hospital, they took a cab to Omar's apartment. They were both sitting in the back, and Ander couldn't stop thinking about Keith's accusation. " _Was he really responsible for what had happened to Omar?"_ He wanted to convince himself that he was not. Omar was no child, and the bad decisions he had made were his responsibility. 

_-What do you think?_ -Omar asked, taking him out of his mind.

_-Huh? Nothing in particular._ -He answered by looking into his eyes but quickly turned his head away from the car window.

_-Okay... If you say so..._ -Omar whispered, resting his head on Ander's shoulder. 

Ander didn't expect such proximity, so all the muscles in his body tensed as he felt Omar reach for his hand to interlock his fingers with his own. That simple touch made him shudder, something that was so natural when they were together; today, it felt so strange... It was so bizarre what was happening that he didn't know how to react. _"What if, when Omar got his memory back, he was angry that he had kept it from him?_ ”

When they arrived at Omar's apartment, he left his backpack by the door and followed Omar inside. Everything was in perfect order, making him remember Keith was there. As soon as they arrived in the kitchen, the memory of the conversation he witnessed between Omar and Keith made him clench his fists involuntarily. Every second he spent alone with Omar only made him feel worse. It made him feel like he was an intruder, playing a role he didn't belong... just like that asshole said.

_-You've been very quiet... Are you going to tell me what's wrong with you?_ -Omar approached him, and taking both hands to each side of him, cornered him against the kitchen counter.

Ander looked at him, thinking of a good excuse, but all capacity for reasoning evaporated, seeing the way Omar looked at him. He bit his bottom lip and tried to let go, but Omar was quicker and prevented him from doing so.

_-It's nothing, Omar... really. It's just that these have been difficult days._

_-Is that really all it is, Ander?_ -He asked very quietly, getting closer to him until their mouths almost brushed against each other.

_-Really... I'm glad you're back home._

Omar smiled at him in a way that made him feel warm all over his body, and then he caught his bottom lip between his teeth, nibbling him lightly. Ander let out a hoarse moan against his mouth, and in a matter of seconds, all his defenses were reduced to nothing. Omar deepened that contact, opening his mouth slightly to caress him with his tongue. That warm touch, along with the pressure of Omar's hips against his, was enough to make Ander hard. 

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig account_

Omar separated a few inches, and looking at him with curiosity; he asked: - _Have you been drinking? You taste like alcohol..._

As soon as he heard him, the memory of Josh kissing him appeared in his mind, but he quickly dismissed it and nodded.

_-Ah... yes... I had a couple of beers at lunch..._

Omar smiled, bringing his arms around Ander's neck to draw him back to him, and continued to kiss him. As soon as he felt Omar's hand unbuckle his belt, Ander gently pushed him away and said the first thing that came to his mind to distract him.

_-Would you like to have some dinner? I can make some pasta... You're probably sick of hospital food..._ -He talked non-stop, opening and closing the cupboard doors, trying to stay as far away from Omar as possible.

_-What I really want is not exactly food..._ -Omar whispered, hugging him from behind while he was still kissing Ander's neck.

_-Omar..._ -He whispered in a muffled voice. - _You just got out of the hospital..._

Every minute that passed, things got more complicated, and if he let Omar continue on that path, he was sure that he would not be able to contain himself.

_-I know... But I'm fine now..._ -He answered against his neck, making him get goosebumps.

_-Omar, come on... Give me a hand, please..._ -He complained, changing tactics. He made a sort of pout, hoping to be convincing enough to dissuade him.

_-Okay, you win_. -Omar reluctantly let him go. - _For now..._

Ander said nothing, although inside, he wanted to shout. He couldn't have sex with Omar and pretend they were the perfect couple enjoying a night of passion. That was clear to him. What he wasn't clear about was what he was going to do to dissuade him...

*******


	37. Agony

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 37 is up.  
> Hope you enjoy it!  
> xoxo

*******

Every minute that passed, things got more complicated, and if he let Omar continue on that path, he was sure that he would not be able to contain himself.

_-I know... But I'm fine now..._ -He answered against his neck, making him get goosebumps.

_-Omar, come on... Give me a hand, please..._ -He complained, changing tactics. He made a sort of pout, hoping to be convincing enough to dissuade him.

_-Okay, you win_. -Omar reluctantly let him go. - _For now..._

Ander said nothing, although inside, he wanted to shout. He couldn't have sex with Omar and pretend they were the perfect couple enjoying a night of passion. That was clear to him. What he wasn't clear about was what he was going to do to dissuade him...

*******

**Chapter 37. Agony**

**_(Omar)_ **

_-Can you help me set the table?_ -Ander asked him, without even looking at him.

Ander had his back to him, looking at the oven's window as if watching the meal was the most exciting task in the world. Omar didn't answer on purpose, hoping that his silence would get Ander's attention. He wasn't sure if it was his imagination or if he was particularly sensitive after what he had experienced in the last few days, but he felt that Ander was doing everything he could to avoid him and that scared him a lot.

No matter how hard he tried to remember what had happened to him, he couldn't get anywhere. His mind was blank, and the unusual way Ander was behaving didn't help him at all; on the contrary, it only made him feel more frustrated. He had gotten tired of asking him what was wrong because he had received the same answers the last five times he had tried. _"There's nothing wrong with me," "I'm tired," "it's been a rough couple of days," or "I'm glad you're back home."_ But far from showing him that happiness he claimed to feel, it seemed as if he was a fragile object that Ander had to deal with tweezers in order not to break him.

After almost a minute in which Omar remained motionless and silent, Ander seemed to notice it as he turned to see him.

- _What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me like that?_ -Ander narrowed his eyes.

_-How am I looking at you?_ -Omar questioned him, studying his features.

_"Ander looked... scared?"_ -He measured, after a few seconds.

_-I don't know... it's as if... Forget it; it doesn't matter._ -He mused and almost immediately added: _"Do you feel well?”_

_-Ander, I'm fine. Please stop treating me like I'm sick._

_-I'm sorry._ -He muttered, looking down. 

Omar rolled his eyes and shook his head but didn't respond. Instead, he opened the cupboard and pulled out a couple of placemats that he put on the kitchen counter. 

Ten minutes later, both were sitting opposite each other with a huge plate of pasta in front of them.

_-Did you like it?_ -Ander asked as he put his fork in his mouth.

_-Yes... it's delicious, thank you for preparing dinner_. -Omar admitted with a smile, trying to start over.

_-Well, it's no big deal. It's just pasta._

_-Yes, but it was cooked by you... and compared to the insipid hospital food, this is priceless..._ -He joked, getting up from his stool to go to the fridge. 

As he looked inside, he asked:

_-Would you like a beer, or would you prefer a glass of wine?_

_-Omar..._ -The tone in which he uttered his name made him turn to look at him.

_-Yes?_ -He raised a questioning eyebrow, fixing his attention on Ander.

_-It's just... I'm not sure it's a good idea when you're just out of the hospital._

_-It's just a beer, Ander! Don't be dramatic..._

Ander pressed his lips, and though he said nothing else, Omar could see the disapproval in his eyes.

_-So, what would you like to drink?_ -Omar insisted, ignoring his comment and feeling annoyed that he wanted to control him.

_-Water for me. Thanks._

Omar shrugged.

_"Party pooper..."_ -He mumbled, closing the fridge door a little tighter than he needed to. 

When he returned to the table and looked at Ander, he knew from the look on his face that he had heard him, but he didn't care. 

_-Jodeeer! This is what I needed..._ -He smiled, satisfied, enjoying the bitter taste.

_-Well... Are you going to tell me how your first tournament went?_ -He asked, changing the subject. 

_-Pff... Not that good. We won, but the truth is that it wasn't because of me._

Omar raised an eyebrow, and Ander reluctantly continued.

_-I had a bad performance... And we almost lost the game if it wasn't for Josh_. -He wiped his mouth with the napkin and put the plate aside without finishing his meal.

_-Josh? -Who's that?_ -Omar asked, interested, finishing the rest of his beer.

He saw Ander stir in his seat as if he were thinking of a good answer, and as a result, Omar was much more curious.

_-Josh is... my game partner. We played a doubles game... I thought I told you about him._ -He explained, looking away.

_-Nope..._ -Omar shook his head. _-Or if you did, I don't remember..._

_-I see..._ -Ander shrugged and grimaced at the same time. _-Well, there's not much to say... In the end, I got a scolding from the coach, so I guess I have to try harder if I don't want to get kicked off the team._

_-You shouldn't worry about that. You're good, and you know it. Besides, anyone has the right to have a bad day.._. -Omar reasoned, getting up from the table to get another beer. When he opened it, he heard Ander's reproachful voice.

_-Are you serious? Are you going to keep drinking?_ -He hissed, making no effort to hide his discomfort, which automatically made Omar roll his eyes, feeling equally pissed off.

_-Jodeeer! What's wrong with you, tío? It's only one more beer... Besides, it's not like I'm falling drunk... like you used to do several years ago..._

As soon as he finished the sentence, he realized his mistake, but it was too late. He had not been able to control his anger and knew that he had gone too far this time.

_-I'm sorry, Ander... I didn't mean that._ -He apologized regretfully.

Ander ran a hand through his hair as he watched him harshly, and Omar could tell that his words had hurt him. It had been a low blow, and it was not clear to him why he had reacted this way. He was too irritable and had an uncontrollable urge to drink as if alcohol had a calming effect.

Ander said nothing. But immediately, he got up and started walking towards the exit. When he saw him take his backpack, Omar ran after him, grabbing his arm to keep him from leaving. Ander made eye contact with him, and what Omar saw in Ander's eyes scared him.

_-Please forgive me... I screwed up. I don't know what's wrong with me... but please don't go._ -He ended in a whisper.

*******

_(Ander)_

He couldn’t believe Omar would have dared to tell him that. His comment had made him remember that painful episode in his past that had brought him so much suffering; when Polo's secret had led him to take refuge in alcohol. He held his gaze long enough to realize that Omar was not well. During that brief scan, he noticed how his hands were shaking, and deep anxiety was reflected on Omar's face.

In that instant, Dr. Kenner's words echoed in his mind... _"You should be very alert for any signs of depression or anxiety that you might detect."_

_-Shit... I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm an idiot, forgive me..._ -He babbled, wiping a tear that rolled down his cheek.

As soon as he saw him like that, so vulnerable and out of control, all the anger he felt evaporated in a second. He dropped his backpack and hugged him tightly.

_-Shhh..._ -He whispered against his ear. - _Everything will be all right. You're going to be all right. Come here..._

Ander took him by the hand and dragged him to the wide sofa. Omar kept his head down until Ander forced him to look at him. 

_-Do you want to tell me what's going on?_

Omar ran both hands to his face and lit a cigarette, offering another to Ander. For a few minutes, they both smoked in silence until finally, Omar began to speak.

[ ](https://ibb.co/RCY6H5h)

_-I don't feel good.._. -He snapped. _-I feel like I'm losing control of my emotions... and it really pisses me off that I can't remember how I got to the hospital. I feel like everyone is hiding something from me..._

Ander ran a hand over Omar's back and began to trace up and down movements in an attempt to reassure him. He wanted to tell him the truth, but he knew that it would only make things worse if he did so. His hands were tied, and he had no choice but to remain silent.

_-Omar, why don't you try to sleep? I'm sure you'll feel better tomorrow._

Omar nodded and slowly stood up. Ander imitated him and tried to find the right words. 

_-I'll call you tomorrow, okay? It's already late and..._

_-What?_ -He muttered in a barely audible voice. _-Won't you stay?_

Ander looked at him and denied, trying to give him a credible excuse.

_-I have no clothes here and I have a class first thing tomorrow._

_-Ander... Why do I feel like there's a gap between you and me and that it's getting wider and wider as the days go by?_ -He asked, clenching his jaw.

_-What are you saying?_ -He muttered, looking away.

_-Did something happen between us that I don't remember? Is that it?_

Ander looked at him and knew he didn't want to keep lying to Omar's face. There were so many things he needed to tell him, so many questions, so many doubts... that as much as he wanted to, he couldn't erase them as if by magic. When he was about to tell him the truth, he remembered Keith's words telling him that he was responsible for what Omar had done, and that was enough to make him back off.

_-No... No, of course not._ -He mumbled without daring to look him in the eye. And as if he were the best actor, he heard himself say:

_-Come on, let's go to sleep. I'll stay and leave early tomorrow._

_-Are you serious?_ -Omar's face lit up as if he were a child and someone promised him to go to an amusement park.

When Ander entered the room and looked sideways at the wide bed, he shuddered without being able to contain himself; that bed was witness to the complicity that had existed between the two before everything went to shit. These were not only memorable nights of passion, but also of tender kisses, or the refuge that every night Ander found in Omar's arms; pillow fights, and long talks in the middle of the night talking about everything and nothing, dreaming of a shared future...

He looked away and went to the bathroom. He needed a moment alone to recover and not show Omar how affected he was too. He was rummaging through the shelves when Omar entered the bathroom. 

_-Hey..._ -He hummed, finding Omar's gaze into the mirror. - _Do you have a toothbrush?_

_-And what happened to yours?_ -Omar wondered.

Ander shrugged. An activity as trivial as brushing the teeth was beginning to become a challenge. _"How could he explain that Omar had most likely thrown it away?_

- _I don't know... I can't find it. Maybe I took it and didn't realize it._ -He hoped Omar would believe him because he felt it was getting harder and harder to keep making excuses.

He brushed his teeth in record time and left the bathroom before Omar did. He got undressed as quickly as he could, and as soon as he heard Omar come into the room, he jumped into bed and went to bed with the blanket up to his neck. He knew that he was acting ridiculously, but he wanted to avoid at all costs, the risk that Omar would want to do more than just sleep.

_-Good night.._. -Ander muttered, pretending to yawn, as he turned off the light on the bedside table next to him.

The mattress sank due to Omar's weight when he went to bed, getting closer to him. He couldn't help but tense his abdominal muscles when Omar's hand began to trace soft caresses against his skin. After a few seconds, he felt Omar's foot seeking for his leg to hook between his. 

It was torture to have Omar by his side and pretend that he didn't want the same as him. Because, just as the jealousy he felt had not diminished one iota, the physical attraction he felt for Omar remained equally intact. Perhaps his brain had clear that fucking Omar was not an option, but his body seemed not to agree.

_-Ander..._ -Omar mused in a husky voice against his neck. - _I need to feel you inside me..._

Ander felt Omar's lips burning his skin, and upon hearing his plea, his body immediately reacted, becoming hard as a rock. That was Omar's effect on him, and there was nothing he could do about it. When Omar caught his mouth with his own, Ander let himself feel that pleasant sensation for a moment, enjoying those expert lips playing with his. When Omar tried to deepen the kiss further, Ander pushed him slightly. He felt his heart beating fast against his chest, and with great effort, he finally found his voice.

_-Omar... Not now, please... I'm tired._ -He stammered.

_-Please..._ -Omar begged in a whisper. _-I need you..._

Ander had to do something to stop him, or he would end up fucking him until he forgot everything. So, he told him what he knew would stop Omar.

_-Omar, is there something going on between you and Keith?_

Ander hadn't been wrong. The mere mention of Keith was enough to make Omar stop touching him and stand on the mattress to look at him. His face was disheveled, and he was looking at him with a frown. Ander knew he was probably mistaken, but he needed to have this conversation with him, memory, or no memory. 

_-What?_ -Omar grunted. _-Is that why you've been acting like this? Do you think I'm cheating on you? Do you think that I'm such a son of a bitch?_

Omar's expression was now a mixture of disbelief and amazement. Ander couldn't figure out if that reaction were real because he didn't remember anything or the whole story with Keith, Ander had made it much bigger than it really was. 

_-I don't know, Omar.._. -He opened up, looking for any sign that he hadn't made a mistake two months ago. _-Since I arrived, that asshole has taken it upon himself to let me know how interested he is in you, and let's be honest... I know you have feelings for him. You can't tell me otherwise... I can tell by the way you look at him._

*******

_(Omar)_

Omar took his hand to his temple and began to massage it. He felt that his head would explode at any moment as he could not believe Ander's words. He knew something was wrong, but he never imagined Ander's attitude was because he thought he was cheating on him. He took a deep breath, trying to calm down before he spoke again. He didn't want to lose his temper and have a pointless argument with Ander because of Keith. Because also... it wouldn't be the first time.

_-Ander, we've talked about this before. I told you at the time, and I'm telling you again. Between Keith and I, there is nothing beyond a friendship. Yes, we indeed hooked up a couple of times, but we both realized that it wouldn't work out, so that ended long before you decided to come and live in New York._

Ander looked at him strangely, as if he didn't believe a word he had said, so Omar gently touched him on the shoulder and insisted once more.

_-Don't you believe me?_

Ander sat up on the bed, turning his back on him. He took both hands to his eyelids and rubbed them. Omar knew him well, and he knew that he often did so when he felt overwhelmed.

_-To be honest, I don't know what to believe..._ -He whispered.

_-Ander... Look at me._ -He asked him.

Ander did so, and as he approached him, Omar grabbed him by the chin and said in a shallow voice:

_-I don't have any romantic feelings for him. The only guy I'm in love with is you, asshole._

Ander smiled almost imperceptibly, but that smile didn't reach his eyes. 

_-I'm tired, Omar. Can we talk about this another time?_

_-No. Let's talk about it now._

_-I don't want to talk about it now, and I don't want to get into an argument with you right after you left the hospital._

_-As you wish, then..._ -He hissed reluctantly. He didn't want to push him any further, so he went to bed and turned off the light on the bedside table. Suddenly a sense of unease came over him, making the need to drink that he had experienced before reappear much more strongly.

Ander went to bed again, leaving a considerable space between them, and at that moment, Omar didn't do anything to approach him either. If he was honest, that talk had turned off the desire that had been killing him until a few minutes earlier. Thus, darkness and silence flooded the room. 

It took a long time until Ander's soft breathing was heard, letting Omar know that he had fallen deeply asleep. But unlike Ander, he could not fall asleep. He felt as if their relationship was hanging by a thread, and there was nothing he could do to change it.

The sound of a mobile vibrating, along with dim light, made him open his eyes. Ander's cellphone was flashing on the bedside table, and without hesitation, he went over to look. He felt as if he had been hit in the stomach when he read the message that Ander had received.

**_[Ander, we need to talk. We were really drunk and got carried away. Josh]_ **

*******


	38. Tear me down until there's nothing left

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, there!
> 
> Chapter 38 is here a little earlier than I had planned. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it.
> 
> Thanks as always for reading, sharing your thoughts, or leaving a Kudo.
> 
> xoxo 😘

*******

Ander went to bed again, leaving a considerable space between them, and at that moment, Omar didn't do anything to approach him either. If he was honest, that talk had turned off the desire that had been killing him until a few minutes earlier. Thus, darkness and silence flooded the room. 

It took a long time until Ander's soft breathing was heard, letting Omar know that he had fallen deeply asleep. But unlike Ander, he could not fall asleep. He felt as if their relationship was hanging by a thread, and there was nothing he could do to change it.

The sound of a mobile vibrating, along with dim light, made him open his eyes. Ander's cellphone was flashing on the bedside table, and without hesitation, he went over to look. He felt as if he had been hit in the stomach when he read the message that Ander had received.

**_[Ander, we need to talk. We were really drunk and got carried away. Josh]_ **

*******

**Chapter 38. Tear me down until there's nothing left**

**_(Ander)_ **

****

_Seven months later_

Bad Bunny's music was interrupted by the ringing of an incoming call. He looked at the clock and saw that there were a few minutes before six o'clock. He pulled his cell phone out of his coat pocket and read _"Mom"_ on the screen. It was almost midnight in Madrid, so he rushed to answer with a smile on his face.

_-Hello, Mom..._ -He greeted her, adjusting his _AirPods_ as he dodged a group of noisy tourists passing by.

Because of the time of day, the streets were much more crowded than usual, making it almost impossible to walk on 5th Avenue, so he decided to turn onto W49 St. to board the subway station on 6th Avenue.

_-Ander, Happy New Year, honey!_ -He heard his mother's warm voice from the other side of the line.

_-Thank you, Mom. How are you doing?_ -he asked, staring absently at the huge Christmas tree at Rockefeller Center and Bryant Park.

_-It's very quiet around here; your father says hello. How are you?_

_-My father? Is there something you want to tell me, Mom?_ -He asked, intrigued.

He heard a loud laugh on the other side of the line, and then, she whispered: - _Nothing at all..._

_-Aha... If you say so... I guess I'll find out sooner than later._ -He joked. _-I'm fine... You know, there's still a few hours before the celebration here._

He talked to his mother for a few more minutes, and before hanging up, he promised her he would do his best to travel to Madrid for spring break. It would be his last semester, and if everything went as planned, he would graduate with honors.

Between tennis and college projects, he had little time left, but he knew he couldn't put things off any longer. He had received an offer to do an internship at Perkins Eastman, one of New York's most prestigious architectural firms, and knew that the decision he made would determine his future for years to come. The reality of why he had not yet responded was that he was not sure if he wanted to stay in the United States or if it would be better to return to Spain.

He breathed a sigh and pursed his lips slightly. He had exactly one month left before he had to make that decision so that he would worry about it later. Today was not the day to think about his future. 

When he entered the subway station, the heating's pleasant warmth made him take off his scarf. He walked to the platform when his cell phone started vibrating again, making him stop in his tracks when he read the message.

**_[Are you on your way here? Don't forget to bring the Christmas gift ...]_ **

- _Joder!_ -he hissed, grimacing, holding one hand to his forehead. 

He had forgotten the gift in his room. For a few seconds, he weighed his options, quickly texting Tom in hopes that he would still be in the dorms and could bring the gift with him. He sent the message and waited as he saw people rushing in and out. A few seconds later, he received the reply, causing him to curse again. Tom was already on his way to the party so that he couldn't help him.

He couldn't get there empty-handed, so, breathing a sigh of resignation, he left the station. He was already late, so returning to campus for the gift was not an option. He headed back to 5th Avenue to find something appropriate. 

He soon spotted a Nike store, so without hesitation, he went inside. The gift was for Justin, and Ander knew his friend was a Barcelona fan, so he thought that giving him a jersey of his favorite soccer team would be a good choice. It wasn't the Lacoste sweater he had originally bought for him, but it would work in the end.

He was rummaging through the racks to find the right size when he heard a deep voice behind him. 

_-A Madrilean buying a Barcelona's jersey? En serio, tío?_

That deep voice that he could recognize anywhere in the world made him freeze for a few seconds. After the initial surprise, and still, with his heart pounding, he slowly turned around to meet Omar head-on.

_-Hey..._ -He whispered, feeling his whole world become colorful as he met his gaze.

Omar looked impressive and more handsome than ever. Dressed in a dark sweatshirt and blue jeans, he smiled at him lovingly. He had a goatee that accentuated his Arab features even more. Ander looked at him slowly, stopping at his lips. Those lips he had kissed so many times, today after so long, gave him a genuine smile.

[ ](https://ibb.co/m0j0jjR)

- _It is a gift... You know I've never been much of a soccer fan._ -He justified himself, shrugging, smiling back at him. 

- _I knew you couldn't change that much in these months._

Ander giggled nervously, thinking about what to say. As much as he wanted to, he couldn't take his eyes off Omar, and in a second, the memories of the last time they met hit him hard.

*******

_He woke up feeling confused. For a few seconds, he remained motionless until he could remember where he was. As his eyes got used to the darkness, he could visualize the silhouette in front of him. Omar was sitting on the edge of the bed with his back to him, and when a dim light illuminated the room, he could see that it came from the cell phone Omar was holding in his hands._

_He sat down on the mattress and looked at the window. The curtains were half-open, so he could see that it was still several hours before dawn. When he realized that Ander had woken up, Omar's rigid posture told him that something was wrong._

_"Omar, what's wrong? Are you all right?" -He approached him by gently touching him on the shoulder._

_As soon as Omar felt his touch, he turned slightly, but Ander couldn't know for sure because the room was dark. When Omar didn't answer, he stood up, turned on the bedside lamp's light, and then stood in front of him._

_"Omar? What is it? You're scaring me..."_

_Omar looked at him but said nothing. He had a strange expression; he looked sad yet determined. Ander saw him stand up to face him, and without a word, he began to kiss him._

_That action caught him off guard. He didn't expect that, so for a moment, he remained motionless, feeling how Omar's mouth claimed his own with harshness. As he could, he brought his hands to Omar's chest to push him slightly, but Omar was much faster, turning his body to drop his weight on him, thus making both of them fall on the bed._

_In a second, Omar straddled him, grabbing him with his knees, and without giving him a break, continued to kiss him hard. His kisses were demanding, full of urgency, and with his tongue, he opened his way through his lips, exploring every corner of his mouth._

_"I want you to fuck me, Ander," -he pleaded hoarsely against his half-open lips._

_Ander was going crazy. He could feel Omar's hard cock rubbing against his. He didn't understand what was happening, but by then, he didn't care much either. What little sanity he had left was fading as Omar's demanding lips rolled across his skin. Now, not only did he use his tongue, but he also used his teeth to bite down on his neck. He knew those caresses would leave marks, but at that moment, he couldn't care less._

_Omar released him only to strip himself and undress him as well. With a sudden wrench, he took off Ander's boxers, and as he did so, Ander could hear the fabric tearing due to the force with which Omar had pulled it. He could see the lust reflected in Omar's pupils, and that was enough for him to lose his sanity as well._

_Ander leaned on and put Omar on his back against the mattress. With one hand, he took Omar by the wrists and carried them over his head, immobilizing him, and then, trapped his mouth with fury._

_Everything was very intense. That moment, the jealousy, the rage, the love he felt for him, the fear, the uncertain future... A wave of passion swept him away, making him forget everything except the need to be with him. Ander's cock was pressing urgently against Omar's, and, with his free hand, he began to jerk Omar off, making him growl. Omar stared at him as he allowed himself to be done. Ander separated Omar's legs, biting his lip, unable to hold himself back any longer. He needed to be inside him, to feel the pressure of Omar's muscles around his cock, so he released his hand and began to trace a series of wet kisses down Omar's body to his inner thighs._

_Omar groaned, raising his pelvis uncontrollably to receive him. Ander held him by the hips to run his tongue over the tip of his cock, savoring the salty taste, only to swallow it whole seconds later. When he felt Omar's hand pulling on his hair, he knew he was close to reaching the orgasm, so he slowed his mouth movements while delighting in hearing him ask for more._

_Ander reluctantly released him, to lean his hands on both sides of Omar's body, a few inches from his face. Both were breathing heavily, losing themselves in each other's gaze. Omar cupped his face with both hands and began to kiss him again, tasting his own flavor._

_"Do you have a condom?" -Ander moaned as they parted to take a breath._

_Omar shook his head and looked at him._

_"No... but it doesn't matter."_

_"Are you sure?" -Ander looked at him, hesitating for a moment. It had been two months since they had broken up, making Keith's image appear suddenly in his mind._

_"I am." -Omar replied, taking him out of his thoughts._

_It wasn't a good idea to do it without protection, but he just didn't want to and couldn't stop._

_"Fuck me," Omar demanded in a muffled voice._

_That one word was enough to drive him crazy. Thinking of nothing but sinking into Omar, he spat against his entrance and then slipped a finger inside, then two, until he found that soft spot, he knew would drive Omar crazy._

_"I don't want to cum like this... I need you inside me now._

_Ander took out his fingers and opening Omar's legs even more; he entered him with a soft and fast lunge. He could see the gesture of pain in Omar's features, so he stopped, giving him time to get used to his size. The sensation of feeling him like that, skin against skin, without any barrier between them, was almost unbearable; he had to concentrate because otherwise, he would cum at any moment._

_Ander felt how Omar's fingertips caressed his back while he sank very slowly into him. Sex consumed them; it made them merge into one. It was almost as if he could see himself through Omar's eyes._

_"Move, please..." -Omar pleaded with a stifled voice after a few seconds._

_"Do you like the way I fuck you?" -Ander whispered before moving. He needed to hear Omar. He wanted Omar to tell him that no one made him enjoy sex the way Ander did._

_"Yes, I love the way you fuck me... So, don't stop." -Omar confessed in a whisper._

_Ander obeyed without hesitation. He went in and out slowly at first, filling him up completely. But as he felt Omar's pressure getting more intense around his cock, he began to move faster in search of his own pleasure. The onslaughts became harsher, causing Omar to dig his fingers into Ander's skin and hold on to him tightly. He felt Omar's body receive him without protest, accepting whatever he was willing to give him._

_"Jodeeer! You are so tight... I love being inside you..." -Ander groaned, fucking him harder, feeling the drops of sweat running down his back. "You drive me crazy. You know that don't you?" -He grunted against his skin._

_"Nene... I'm about to cum"_

_-Yes... I want to watch you... cum for me, Omar." -Ander groaned in a broken voice._

_And at that very moment, Omar began to do so, splashing Ander's abdomen and chest with semen. Ander's release came almost immediately when he saw Omar's face transforming with pleasure. He let out a guttural moan against Omar's mouth as he dropped all his weight on him. Neither spoke for several minutes while their breathing returned to normal._

_He was still lying on Omar's chest when he heard him speak._

_"I know, Ander."_

_He said it so quietly that for a moment, Ander thought he had imagined it._

_"What?" -He asked, standing up to see his face._

_"I remember everything. Now I know why no one wanted to tell me anything."_

_The bitter tone in his voice, along with his words, made Ander sit down, putting on the T-shirt, the same one Omar had pulled him off. Omar's face now showed a deep sadness. Ander began to feel fear, and for a moment, he didn't know what to say. Omar looked at him and continued talking._

_"Do you know what it was that made me remember?" -He asked with a hint of irony in his voice. And without waiting for an answer from Ander, he released a kind of bitter laugh._

_"I couldn't sleep. I was thinking... about us. About what was the reason why I felt you so distant... And then, your phone rang, you know?" -He mused._

_"My phone? What does that have to do with it?" -He questioned him, without understanding anything. While waiting for Omar to continue talking, he picked up his cell phone and realized he had a message. When he read what Josh had sent him, he paled._

_"Omar... Listen... It's not what you think..."_

_Omar grimaced as he shook his head._

_"It doesn't matter now, Ander. Anyway, I know we haven't been together for a couple of months now... But that's not what made me remember... Did you know that in addition to getting drunk until I lost my senses, I had started using cocaine and that was the reason why I ended up in the hospital?"_

_"Omar... listen to me." He tried to shut him up, but it was no use. It seemed Omar was talking with himself instead of Ander as if he was unraveling an important equation._

_"About an hour ago, I got a message from the dealer I used to buy from, asking me if I didn't need another dose. That's when all the memories came flooding back... And now I can remember what happened when you popped up here while I was talking with Keith."_

_Ander didn't know what to say. He didn't expect that after what they had just shared, Omar would tell him all this. He was silent for a moment, reflecting on his words._

_"Well?" -He finally snapped, feeling anger and jealousy retake hold of him. "Were you fucking him while I was trying to get you back?"_

_"What difference does it make? I know that no matter what I tell you, you'll still believe it was so. You didn't believe me when I went to look for you in your room, so why should you believe me now?" -He asked bitterly. "Do you know that I started using and drinking like a madman to try to forget about you?_

_"What are you saying?_

_"The truth... is stupid, isn't it?" -Omar grunted, "But don't worry... you're not responsible for my actions. -A tear ran down his cheek as he spoke._

_By this time, the conversation between the two had become so raw that Ander didn't know what else to say. Although Omar had assured him that he was not responsible for what had happened to him, he could not shake off the guilt he felt._

_"Omar, this is all very fucked up. Why is it that if you got your memory back, you asked me to...”_

_"To fuck me?" -He interrupted him. "Call it what you want... maybe I needed to feel you one last time." -He opened up, looking at him._

_Ander knew what Omar's words meant, and even though they hadn't been together for a couple of months, it didn't stop hurting him any less. On the contrary, these days, pretending to be his boyfriend, along with the incredible fuck they had just shared, only made him feel like someone had torn his heart out._

_"We've hurt each other so much..." -Ander said, unable to hold back his tears any longer._

[ ](https://ibb.co/kczdt3r)

_"Yes... a lot," he nodded, trying to wipe his tears away to no avail. "I think it's better that we don't see each other anymore... and each tries to heal on their own. It's best for both of us..."_

_"Omar... -He murmured in a kind of plea. Ander knew Omar was right, and if he thought carefully, what Omar was telling him was exactly what he had planned to tell him. An honest conversation between them, right? But then, why did it hurt so much? Why did it feel like his chest was cracking in two? -He tried to suppress a sob, and then, looking at Omar, he confessed, "I love you..."_

_"And I love you too... more than you can imagine, but we don't do each other any good"._

*******

_-So, how have you been?_ -Omar asked, pulling him out of his memories. - _I saw you once from afar; you had just come from playing tennis... Well, I can imagine it because you were carrying your tennis bag and were dressed in your uniform._

Ander raised his eyebrows when he heard this but said nothing. In these seven months, he had only seen Omar once, and just like Omar, he had done nothing to get close to him either.

_-Yes, I'm still on the team. It seems I haven't done so badly because the coach hasn't threatened to kick me out again_. -He smiled weakly. - _How are you doing?_

It felt so strange talking to Omar again... having a civil conversation; like they were two good friends who had stopped seeing each other for a long time and were catching up. But he knew that was far from being true. Because if Omar were his friend, he wouldn't feel that twinge in his stomach or that urgent need to hold him between his arms.

_-Well, I'm not complaining, tío._ -He responded by raising his shoulders. _-I quit my job because it wasn't fun anymore, and even though I have some money saved up, I need to find something else... so I'm working on it._

_-I see... Well, I'm sure you'll find something soon. You're good, so you shouldn't worry._

_-Yes... that's what Keith says, so I guess you're right._

When he heard Keith's name, he felt like he'd been punched in the stomach, but he pulled himself together.

_-Keith, huh? Are you with him?_ -He managed to ask.

Omar pursed his lips as if he had realized too late his indiscretion.

_-Kind of... It's not like what you and I had, but it's not so bad either. I guess not all relationships are so... intense._

_-Ah..._ -It was the only thing he could say, looking away.

Suddenly, he began to feel that he couldn't breathe, and all he wanted to do was get out of there. Knowing that Omar was with Keith had affected him much more than he would have liked to admit.

_-And you? Are you with someone? Is that for him?_ -Omar pointed to the jersey that Ander was holding.

Ander looked at the jersey as if he were seeing it for the first time. He had completely forgotten that he had the garment in his hands until he finally shook his head in denial.

_-No... I... am not with anyone. I've met some people, but no one worthwhile enough to want to start a relationship._

_-I see..._ -Omar mumbled. 

An uncomfortable silence began to grow between the two of them.

_-Well, I have to go... It's already late, and they are waiting for me. You know, New Year's Eve celebration with some friends._

_-It was good to see you, Ander. Listen, it would be good to meet one of these days and have a drink... I mean a coffee… I don't drink anymore._ -He clarified, blushing slightly.

_-I'm glad to hear that, Omar._ -He said. _-I mean it._

_-Yes, well... the first few months were bullshit, but now I'm much better... So, what do you say? I'd really wish us to catch up and..._

_-Of course, that would be cool... Do you still have the same number?_ -He asked, just to say something.

Omar nodded.

_-Okay... Well, then... I'll call you one of these days..._

Ander turned around, walking away. He had come a few feet forward when he heard Omar's voice again.

_-Ander..._

_-Yes?_

_-Happy New Year._

Ander tried to smile without much success. 

_-Happy New Year, Omar._

*******


	39. Time bomb

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was necessary to settle some things into the plot. I'm working on the next one, and I plan to update it in a few days.  
> So, enjoy it!  
> xoxo

*******

_-Well, I have to go... It's already late, and they are waiting for me. You know, New Year's Eve celebration with some friends._

_-It was good to see you, Ander. Listen, it would be good to meet one of these days and have a drink... I mean a coffee… I don't drink anymore._ -He clarified, blushing slightly.

_-I'm glad to hear that, Omar._ -He said. _-I mean it._

_-Yes, well... the first few months were bullshit, but now I'm much better... So, what do you say? I'd really wish us to catch up and..._

_-Of course, that would be cool... Do you still have the same number?_ -He asked, just to say something.

Omar nodded.

_-Okay... Well, then... I'll call you one of these days..._

Ander turned around, walking away. He had come a few feet forward when he heard Omar's voice again.

_-Ander..._

_-Yes?_

_-Happy New Year._

Ander tried to smile without much success. 

_-Happy New Year, Omar._

*******

**Chapter 39. Time bomb**

**_(Omar)_ **

****

_One day later_

_-“A penny for your thoughts,”_ -Keith mumbled, making Omar look at him. He gently took the cigarette Omar was holding between his fingers and gave it a deep puff. Seconds later, he threw the ashes inside the ashtray next to him and again gave it to him.

Both of them were naked and sweaty between the ruffled sheets. Omar kept smoking in silence. He wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to tell him that a day before, he had bumped into Ander because not even he had assimilated it yet. After so much time, talking to him had affected him in so many ways, and he wasn’t prepared to have that conversation with Keith, at least not at that moment.

_-I was thinking about how fast time passed by…_ -He mumbled, forcing a smile.

If he closed his eyes and concentrate enough, he could remember exactly how it had been the prior New Year’s Eve. That reunion between them in a hotel room, 365 days before, had marked him forever. It seemed an entire life would have passed since then, but he remembered it so vividly that it still hurt. The relationship with Ander was always intense from the beginning, not only the good things, but the bad things as well, and maybe, for that reason, neither of them had known how to handle it.

_-Are you sure it is only that? Because you look weird._ -Keith insisted, massaging Omar’s shoulders as he spoke.

_-I’m fine…_ -He lied, standing up from the bed. - _I’m gonna take a shower._

It was pleasant to feel the hot water pressure falling over the skin, and while he enjoyed that sensation, his mind traveled to the day before.

He had arranged to meet Keith near Grand Central to arrive together at Matt's house where they would celebrate the New Year's arrival, and it was while walking down 5th Avenue that he saw him. He could recognize him among thousands; those broad shoulders, the curly hair, the way he walked, everything about him, was unique. For a few seconds, he didn't know what to do; it seemed as if time and his heart had suddenly stopped, and he couldn't do anything but watch him.

When he saw him enter the store, he thought of nothing else but following him. It seemed as if Ander had a magnet that was irremediably attracting him. At first, he had been told that he would only be satisfied with seeing him from a distance, but he could not keep his word. He didn't know if his decision to approach him and talk to him was due to the surprise of meeting him on that very special day, or if it was something much deeper, which, at that moment, and until today, he had not been able to recognize. 

Those brief minutes in which they chatted as if they were two friends catching up were enough for Omar to realize that nothing had changed. At least as far as he was concerned. The love he felt for Ander remained intact; he had felt the same emotion he had experienced many years before when he saw him at that party at Samuel's house. His hands were sweating, his legs were barely holding him, and his heart was beating as fast as when they first kissed.

_-Omar? Do you want me to order food, or would you rather we go out to eat_? -Keith's voice forced him to open his eyes.

He sighed and turned off the tap. When he opened the door to get a towel, Keith was already leaning against the sink, looking at him with a carefree gesture.

_-Whatever you prefer is fine with me._

_-Are you sure?_

_-Yes, I'm not very hungry anyway..._ -He said, as he dried his hair with the towel.

_-I'll order Chinese food, then_. -And winking at him, he came out of the bathroom.

As he watched him head towards the kitchen, he thought about the kind of relationship that they had had for a few months and why he hadn't been able to give Ander a concrete answer when he asked him about it. Keith had been one of his friends who had helped him the most to get out of the abyss he was in, being a key part of his recovery. Omar knew this and would be eternally grateful to him for it. 

The first few days after he and Ander agreed not to see each other anymore had been little more than dark, and Keith had been there for him. He hadn't left him alone for a single moment, and when Omar was about to relapse, Keith had prevented that from happening. He had accompanied him to doctor's appointments and had even been by his side during the rehab sessions Dr. Kenner had recommended he attended.

He was very fond of him, but he knew he would never fall in love with him. It was also not clear to him that things had changed between them to the point of ending up back sleeping again. They had never talked about starting a relationship, but Keith had apparently thought it was that way, and Omar had done nothing to correct Keith's mistake. He didn't think it was necessary at the time, and until a few hours before, it wasn't something that would disturb his sleep; but after meeting Ander again, he had begun to question it.

On the other hand, his sex life was... how to describe it? Grey, and almost null? If someone were to ask him about it, that would be the most appropriate phrase to define it. Since the last time he had made love with Ander, he had never made love with anyone else, at least not like he used to with Ander, and that included Keith as well. And well, if he was honest, he hadn't been hooking up with many people these last few months either.

Maybe it was silly, but consciously or unconsciously, something inside him kept him from giving himself to someone else in that intimate way; it was something he didn't want to do until he was sure he had moved on. And the fact that he kept dreaming about Ander meant that he was far from achieving it. 

So, the few times he and Keith had hooked up, it was Omar who was fucking him, just like he had been a couple of hours before. They had never talked about it openly, but when Keith had once suggested changing roles, Omar had made it clear to him that that would not happen, and Keith had not tried it again either. Besides, he didn't seem to care much about it either.

_-Omar, the delivery is here!_ -Keith shouted from the kitchen.

_-I'm coming! -_ He dressed in sweatpants and a blue t-shirt and walked barefoot towards the kitchen.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

They sat down to eat in the living room while they watched a movie. Omar barely tasted the chop suey, and as for the movie, he didn't know anything about it until the final credits appeared. During all that time, he hadn't stopped thinking about Ander. It was supposed to be best for both of them to put some distance between them, but then why had he asked them to meet for coffee? 

_"You know the answer perfectly well."_ -Omar mentally recriminated himself, slowly releasing the air from his lungs.

- _What about that sigh? Did the film affect you that much?_ -Keith joked from the other side of the couch.

Omar looked at him for a few seconds before answering. Keith deserved to know the truth. Not only about his "accidental" encounter with Ander, but also about how he felt about it. He was sure he wouldn't jump out of his skin, but after all the things Keith had done for him, it was the least Omar could do. Being honest with him.

- _Keith... There's something I'd like to tell you_. -He muttered, looking away for a moment.

_-What is it? Why do you say it in that tone? Is it something bad?_ -He dropped one question after another.

_-Yesterday I bumped into Ander..._ -He answered. Directly and bluntly.

_-What do you say? With that asshole? And? I hope you told him to fuck off..._ -Not only had he changed his tone of voice, but also the upright posture he adopted against the sofa as he watched him waiting for an answer.

_-Keith..._ -Omar began, speaking quietly, making an effort not to startle.

_-What, Omar? Why are you looking at me like that? It's the least you should do, after all the bullshit he's done to you... Or are you going to tell me that you've forgotten what a hard time you had last year? Because if you do, I can remind you..._

Omar was listening to him, and although he partially understood Keith's position, he didn't feel comfortable hearing him talk about Ander like that. He knew that Keith's point of view would never be objective when it came to judging him. And Omar believed that what had happened between him and Ander had been their fault, not only Ander's.

_-Look, Keith... I know you care about me, and I appreciate it. I really do, but if I don't blame him for what happened to me, you shouldn't do it either_. -Omar said, trying to keep a cool head.

_-How nice, Omar! Very noble of you!_ -He mocked, clapping a couple of times before he continued talking. _-Well, so what? You saw him and... what did he say to you?_

_-Not much. We talked for a few minutes, and at the end, I told him that... it would be good to meet up and catch up..._

_-Wow... That's fucking great... So, what does that mean, Omar? Do you want to go back to the same shit you had with him? You're really fucked up... you know that, right?_

Omar was silent.

_-What about us? What about me? Where do I fit into all this?_ -Keith's face was red in rage, and by this time, he had gotten off the couch and was walking around like a caged lion.

Omar stood up too, and standing in his way, faced him.

_-I'm not saying I want to go back to him!_ -Omar raised his voice, feeling that everything was going to hell as every minute passed. _-I'm just telling you how things happened, or would you rather have me not telling you anything? Jodeeer! I don't even know if we're going to see each other or not, but... if I'm honest with you, I'd like to..._

_-You know what? Fuck you, Omar. You enjoy being treated like crap..._

_-Keith! Listen to me..._ -Omar took him by the arm.

Keith ran his hand across his eyelids in anger as his eyes filled with tears, and he let go with one swipe. Omar saw him take his stuff, and without saying anything else, he left his apartment, slamming the door. He knew that what just happened could mean the end of their relationship, but he had no idea what else he could have said to keep him from leaving like that.

His mouth was dry, and he felt like a big son of a bitch. Maybe if he had tried harder, he would have been able to appreciate what he had with him. He felt awful. Not just for Keith, but himself. Maybe Keith was right and wasn't thinking clearly. But unfortunately, there was nothing he could do to change how he felt. He couldn't rule over his heart and silence it with a snap of his fingers.

Was he pathetic? Most likely. Perhaps by this time, Ander had already forgotten about their encounter, while he could not think of anything else. But just remembering the way Ander had looked at him made him forget everything else.

*******

_Two weeks later_

_-And what do you plan to do? Because... the truth is you look like shit, Omar._ -Nadia blurted out, looking at him with a worried look through her cell phone screen.

It had been two weeks since he had seen Ander, and since then, Omar felt he was losing control of his emotions. Again, a feeling of sadness was taking hold of him, and there was nothing he could do about it. When Ander had told him that he would call him in the next few days, he had embraced that possibility with hope, but after two weeks of silence, he began to realize that maybe that wouldn't happen. 

His last option had been to call Nadia and try to find out from her if Ander had talked to Guzman about their encounter. But when his sister told him that, although Ander had called them to wish them a happy New Year, he had never mentioned him.

_-I'm pathetic, right?_ -He muttered, looking at his sister through the screen.

_-Don't say that, Omar._

_-After all those months apart and the way things ended between us, I don't know why I thought Ander would really call me. Really, Nadia, I don't know why I can't get over him..._

_-If it's any consolation, Ander sounded weird..._

_-Weird, how?_ -Omar looked up, fixing all his attention on Nadia.

_-I don't know... sad? He didn't sound like he was celebrating, you know?_

_-Nah, you're just saying that because you want to make me feel good, I know..._ -He grimaced as he said it.

_-Why don't you come, Omar?_ -She asked suddenly.

_-What?_

_-Yeah, I'm sure it would be good for you to spend a few days here. To see mama and baba; and Marina who always asks about you, our friends... Now you don't have a job, and you've already finished college... So, you could stay away for a few days, what do you think?_ -She encouraged him, showing a big smile.

Omar weighed up her proposal. Nadia was right; he had already accredited all the subjects and only had to complete some procedures at the university, so, if he wanted, he could travel to Madrid for a few days. Perhaps being with his family and friends was what he needed to clear his mind and feel better. Also, since Keith had left in a rage, he hadn't spoken to him again, although he had tried several times.

_-I'll think about it, okay?_

_-But really do it. I love you._ -She said goodbye to him. - _Oh, and don't disappear for so long, okay?_

*******

**_(Ander)_ **

_January 20th_

_-Ander, turn off the light! I wanna sleep_... -Tom complained, covering his eyes with his pillow.

Ander rolled his eyes when he heard him. Tom had become a very good friend, but sometimes he could be an ass.

_-Do you know how annoying you can be sometimes?_ -Ander replied. - _I need to finish my project because the deadline is today before 11:59 pm, so give me a few minutes, okay?_

_-I accept that sometimes I can be a pain in the ass, but are you aware that you are in a nasty mood lately?_ -Tom fought back.

_-You're out of your mind, of course, I'm not..._ -Ander muttered, without taking his eyes off the computer. 

_-Even if you deny it, you know I'm right, Ander_. -And giving up, Tom turned his back and covered his head with the blanket.

_-Fuck off..._ -Ander hissed very quietly so Tom wouldn't hear.

_-I heard you, you asshole!_ -Tom complained, sitting up on the bed. _-What you need is to have sex... maybe then you wouldn't be so bitter... Look at me, how happy I am_. -He scoffed.

When Ander showed him his finger in response, Tom laughed and went to bed again.

_-I'm just saying..._

Ander ignored him and continued to work. As the minutes passed, his stress level increased, and Tom's loud snoring echoing throughout the room didn't help. Almost forty minutes later, he was able to get his project on the platform and sent it off. He looked at the clock and breathed a sigh of relief. It was seven minutes to midnight.

He turned off the light and dropped down on his bed, exhausted. Lately, he had trouble falling asleep, and that night, despite the tiredness he felt, it was no exception. He knew Tom was right, but he would never accept it in front of him. Since he had run into Omar, his mood was shitty, and he knew exactly why. He kept tormenting himself by imagining him with Keith, and no matter how hard he tried to convince himself that it shouldn't affect him, it was useless.

Just when he thought things were getting better, and he was spending less time thinking about him, Omar had come back into his life, turning it upside down again. He had been tempted to call out to him more than once, but he had managed to restrain himself.

_"What was the point?"_ -He thought bitterly once again.

*******

Something vibrating against his hand made him open his eyes. He had fallen asleep with his cell phone in his hand, so as he could, he tried to focus on the screen to see who was calling him in the early morning hours. He felt a twinge in his stomach as he read Omar's name blinking over and over.

_-Omar?_ -He whispered so as not to wake Tom.

_-Hey..._ -Ander heard Omar's deep voice on the other side of the line.

_-What's wrong? Are you okay?_ -He asked, leaning against the headboard.

_-I'm fine. I'm sorry if I woke you up..._

_-What time is it?_ -He muttered, looking at his watch only to confirm that it had only been half an hour since he had gone to bed.

_-I don't know, but I'll call you another day if you want._

_-No, it's okay. I'm awake now anyway._

_-I see... Well... I called you because... it was nice to see you, and I don't know... maybe you deleted my number, and that's why you haven't called me..._ -He heard Omar laughing nervously. - _Although if so, I shouldn't call you, right?_

Ander closed his eyes. Omar was making it very difficult for him.

_-No, it's not that, it's just that I've been really busy and..._ -He kept silent, not knowing what else to say. 

Ander didn't want to tell him the truth; that he had lost count of the times, he had dialed him to hang up almost immediately.

- _Yes, I figured it out. Well... I wanted to know if you would like to have coffee with me tomorrow..._ -He stammered.

Ander couldn't help but smile. He felt that his heart would come out of his chest at any moment, and before he knew it, he heard himself muttering:

_-Yeah, it sounds good._ -He mumbled with a smile on his face.

_-Okay..._ -Omar muttered. Ander couldn't see him, but from the tone of his voice, he knew Omar was smiling too.

He didn't know why fate had brought them together again, or if by accepting to see him, he was making a huge mistake he would regret later, but he would enjoy what that call had made him feel... even if it was just for that night.

*******


	40. There's a light at the end of the tunnel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> We're reaching the end of this fic!
> 
> Thanks for accompanying me during these months...
> 
> xoxo 💙

*******

Ander didn't want to tell him the truth; that he had lost count of the times, he had dialed him to hang up almost immediately.

- _Yes, I figured it out. Well... I wanted to know if you would like to have coffee with me tomorrow..._ -He stammered.

Ander couldn't help but smile. He felt that his heart would come out of his chest at any moment, and before he knew it, he heard himself muttering:

_-Yeah, it sounds good._ -He mumbled with a smile on his face.

_-Okay..._ -Omar muttered. Ander couldn't see him, but from the tone of his voice, he knew Omar was smiling too.

He didn't know why fate had brought them together again, or if by accepting to see him, he was making a huge mistake he would regret later, but he would enjoy what that call had made him feel... even if it was just for that night.

*******

**Chapter 40. There's a light at the end of the tunnel**

**_(Omar)_ **

****

He looked at himself in the mirror once more, frowning. This was the fifth shirt he tried on, but he was not satisfied with it either. As he unbuttoned it, he let out a sigh of frustration, only to put back on the black shirt he had originally chosen.

He knew it was silly and that Ander might not even notice what he was wearing, but he wanted to look attractive to him without it being too obvious that he had tried too hard. He put on some lotion and looked at his watch; he had to hurry, or he would be late. He took one last look at his appearance and hurried out of his apartment, trying to control that tingling in his stomach that had not stopped tormenting him since he and Ander had talked the night before.

They had arranged to meet at _"Devoción,"_ a cozy cafeteria near the campus, where they used to go when Ander had just arrived in town. It was a very nice place; it was mostly decorated with plants of all kinds, which gave it an intimate touch. Also, the food was delicious, and they made the best cappuccinos Omar had ever tasted.

When he entered the place, it didn't take long to spot Ander. He was sitting in one of the booths located in the cafeteria's corner; he was dressed in pants, a black T-shirt, and a brown checkered beret. Ander was so immersed in checking his cell phone that he didn't notice him, so Omar allowed himself to observe him closely. He thought he would never get tired of it.

Ander was a handsome guy, that was undeniable, but beyond his physical appearance, in Omar's eyes, his attraction lay in many other qualities: in his confident and determined expression; in his pure look, in that frank smile, and in the unconditional way in which he gave himself to the people he loved; Omar had experienced it firsthand, and to this day, no one had been able to make him feel that way.

_-Have you been waiting for a long time?_ -Omar finally greeted him, trying to hide his nervousness.

_-Hey..._ -Ander replied by standing up, leaving his cell phone on the table.

The two looked at each other for what seemed like an eternity. Omar couldn't do anything but get lost in that smile he had missed so much. Ander smiled weakly at him, but it was enough to make him feel like he was floating. Suddenly, he didn't know what he should do; he wanted to hug him, but he knew it wouldn't be a good idea. Before he could decide, Ander held out his hand, and Omar finally shook it. It felt so strange to greet each other like that... as if they were two good friends and not the passionate lovers they once were.

_-I've been here less than ten minutes_. -Ander confessed, dropping back into the seat. _-I didn't know if you felt like eating something, but I ordered this one for you. I hope it's still your favorite._ -He muttered, handing him a steaming cup.

Omar looked at the beverage, unable to hide a grin. _-Chai Latte... Thanks, you still remember it..._

Ander blushed slightly but said nothing else. 

- _How have you been?_ -They said in unison.

_-Joder..._ -Ander chuckled, and Omar imitated him stirring on the seat.

_-This place hasn't changed much. I haven't been here since..._ \- Ander was silent.

_-Yes, neither have I..._ -Omar confessed. - _Ander... Thank you for agreeing to have a coffee with me._

- _Yes... Well..._ -Ander agreed, playing nervously with his cell phone. _-I'm glad to see you... really Omar._

_-I didn't know if I was doing the right thing by calling you, but I really wanted to talk to you and see how you were doing. I know things didn't end well between us, but when I saw you, and we talked, it was like nothing had changed..._

Ander grimaced, holding a hand to the back of his head.

_-But things have changed..._

_-Yes, you're probably right, but I don't know... if I'm honest, I didn't realize how much I'd missed you until I saw you in that store..._

_-I see..._ -Ander looked at him, biting his bottom lip.

Omar could see the sadness in Ander's eyes, but also something else he could not identify.

- _I have missed you too._ -Ander confessed. _-I don't know; I guess I was so used to having you in my life that it was hard not to hear from you all this time._

Omar couldn't hide his joy at hearing this.

_-Ander... Do you think we could try to be friends? It would be good to have you in my life again._

It was done. He had said it. He was being brutally honest, but he was tired of pretending or keeping his feelings to himself. All these months, he was focused on healing his wounds; he had learned to become mature too; talking to Ander again made him realize that he didn't want to lose him one more time. Maybe they couldn't be a couple again, but at least he would try to have his friendship.

_-Friends?_ -Ander muttered. _-We've never been friends, Omar..._

_-I see... I understand if you don't want to..._ -He answered in a shallow voice, feeling defeated.

_-I suppose we could try..._

Hearing him, his world lit up again, and smiling from ear to ear, he nodded. _-Vale..._

_-Although I don't know if that would please..._ -Ander fell silent for a few seconds, looking at him sideways. _-…your boyfriend..._

_-My boyfriend?_ -He repeated, feeling confused. Suddenly, he remembered what he had told Ander when they met in that store. _-Ah... that... No, I don't have a boyfriend, nor am I with anyone right now._

Ander arched his eyebrows, showing skepticism.

_-When we talked, you told me you were with him..._

_-Yeah, well, let's just say that Keith wasn't happy to hear that you and I bumped into each other again... much less when I told him I wanted to see you again._

Omar didn't want to go into Keith's subject. Even though things between him and Keith had become complicated, he didn't think he should talk about Keith with Ander. He felt that it would be a way of betraying him if he did so, and Keith didn't deserve it.

**_(Ander)_ **

A mixture of contradictory feelings overcame him when he learned that Omar was no longer with him. But, perhaps, hope was the feeling that prevailed among all the others. Hearing Omar telling him how much he had missed him had given him a warm feeling of well-being that was incomparable.

_-I don't know what to say... I'm sorry, I guess_. -And almost immediately, he corrected himself. - _No, that's not true... I'm not sorry at all._

Omar didn't say anything, he just looked at him like he used to when they were together, and for those few seconds, it made him feel like he was the most important person in Omar's life. He looked down and saw Omar playing nervously with the button of his shirt. 

_-You keep biting your nails..._ -he stated. And without thinking, he took Omar's right hand, and with his thumb, he caressed Omar's fingertips.

An electric current ran through his body. Feeling the warmth, the touch of Omar's skin against his, was enough to make him let go immediately. Not even half an hour had passed since Omar had arrived, and all he wanted was to hold him in his arms. It was an agony he was experiencing, and Omar's proposal to try to be friends seemed impossible to him right now.

The next hour they were chatting about their lives; little by little, the awkwardness of the first few minutes dissipated, and without realizing it, the familiarity between them returned as if all those months apart had never existed. That's how he found out that Omar had already accredited all his subjects and was just doing the final paperwork to get his degree. 

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig account_

Ander told him about the tennis tournaments and how he had earned a place on the team. He also told him that this would be his last semester since he had to take some subjects that had not been validated. Also, Omar told him that he was thinking of traveling to Madrid to spend a couple of weeks with his family.

_-Que guay! I miss Madrid so badly..._ -He murmured nostalgically. - _You'll see Marina! I miss her... I hope she hasn't forgotten me..._ -He joked.

_-What are you saying, tío? My niece loves you... I have to confess that I was a little jealous because of that..._ -Omar said to him jokingly as well.

Ander laughed as he heard him, shrugging.

_-Well... It's true; she loves me more than she loves you._

_-Gilipollas! You wish_... -Omar mumbled, unable to hide a smile.

Little by little, as Omar watched him, the smile disappeared until he made a serious gesture.

_-Ander... I want to say that I'm sorry for having hurt you. Now that I look back on it, I know I shouldn't have kept what happened with Keith from you. I'm really sorry_.

Ander wanted to hug him, but he held back. Instead, he just nodded weakly.

_-It's okay... I understand now, Omar. Besides, it wasn't all your fault. I didn't react as I should have either; I know that now. Maybe if I had listened to you, things would have been different between us, and you wouldn't have ended up in the hospital. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you and that he was the one who was there for you._

_-I guess we were both wrong..._ -Omar concluded sadly. - _I just want you to know that... I'm here now._

_-Thanks. You can count on me too, I mean it._ -He whispered as well. -Well, then... I think I should go. I have training in a little while.

Omar nodded and stood up. Ander imitated him, hanging his backpack over his shoulder, and he turned around to say goodbye. Omar held out his hand, and without thinking, Ander hugged him instead. When he felt Omar's warm arms around his back, he could only squeeze him tighter. It felt so good to be in Omar's arms that he wished that moment could last much longer.

*******


	41. If we were together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, chapter 41 is up.
> 
> Hope you like it!
> 
> xoxo

*******

Ander wanted to hug him, but he held back. Instead, he just nodded weakly.

_-It's okay... I understand now, Omar. Besides, it wasn't all your fault. I didn't react as I should have either; I know that now. Maybe if I had listened to you, things would have been different between us, and you wouldn't have ended up in the hospital. I'm sorry that I wasn't there for you and that he was the one who was there for you._

_-I guess we were both wrong..._ -Omar concluded sadly. - _I just want you to know that... I'm here now._

_-Thanks. You can count on me too, I mean it._ -He whispered as well. -Well, then... I think I should go. I have training in a little while.

Omar nodded and stood up. Ander imitated him, hanging his backpack over his shoulder, and he turned around to say goodbye. Omar held out his hand, and without thinking, Ander hugged him instead. When he felt Omar's warm arms around his torso, he could only squeeze him tighter. It felt so good to be in Omar's arms that he wished that moment could last much longer.

*******

**Chapter 41. If we were together**

**_(Keith)_ **

My cell phone is ringing again for the fifth day in a row, and this is the fourth time in the last hour. I don't even bother to check who's calling anymore because I know it in advance. I divert the call and look at Jules, trying to remember what we were talking about.

_-It's Omar, isn't it?_ -She mutters, looking at me with those big green eyes, and I'm pretty sure I can see the disappointment in them.

_-Uh-huh..._ -I reluctantly respond, taking a puff on the joint I'm holding between my fingers.

_-So? Are you not going to talk to him again?_ -I hear a certain disdain in her voice, which makes me even angrier.

_-I told you, I have nothing to talk to him about._ -I answer her a little more abruptly than I would have liked. 

I know that Jules is not to blame for what happened between Omar and me, but I am very annoyed that she tries to justify him. Over the past few years, she has witnessed what has happened between the two of us, and perhaps for that reason, I cannot understand why she is not completely on my side. Indeed, she has not said it out loud, but I know her so well that I know what she thinks about it.

It's Friday, and we've decided to spend the afternoon in Fort Green Park. Omar and I often used to come here, and then as now, we spent long hours talking and enjoying the tranquility that this park provides. I lean my head against the thick trunk of the tree and close my eyes for a moment. I can't stand her incisive gaze as she watches me. She is lying on the grass with her head resting on my lap, and even with her eyes closed, I can feel her disapproving look.

_-You know that sooner or later you will have to talk to him, don't you?_ -Jules challenges me. When I stop feeling the weight of her head on my legs, I force myself to open the eyes.

She sits down and looks at me, raising an eyebrow.

_-Jules, stop it..._ -I'm complaining, looking away.

_-Keith..._ -She insists, holding my chin to force me to look at her.

_-What? There's nothing to talk about. It's clear that Omar doesn't care about me, and he prefers to be with that jerk._ -I feel a lump in my throat as I say it aloud, and I need to make a great effort to hold myself back when I feel my eyes burn from the tears that threaten to come out.

_-You don't know that_... -Jules mumbles, taking the joint out of my hand to bring it to her lips.

_-I don't know that? You're kidding, right? He told me he wanted to see him again._ -I can't hide the bitterness in my voice.

It hurts me more than I want to admit, and I can't help but feel betrayed, even though I know I have no right to be. Deep down, I always feared something like this would happen because all this time, Omar never promised me anything, nor did he tell me he loved me; I took it for granted, and now I know that was my mistake. 

I held on to him so tightly that I couldn't or wouldn't see the obvious. When Omar broke up with Ander, I saw him so determined that I thought I might have a chance, but clearly, I was wrong. It was so easy to fall in love with him. Omar shines on his own. When I was with him, everything else paled in comparison, and the fact that we don't have that closeness again is what hurts me the most.

_-Keith, you always knew what Omar felt. You confessed it to me once._

_-Fuck, Jules! Whose side are you on, huh? You don't need to remind me that..._

_-I'm sorry... I'm just trying to help you_. -I hear her whispering. 

I know I'm acting like a complete asshole, but this whole Omar thing is beyond me.

_-I'm sorry..._ -I apologize after a while. _-I know you're right, but that doesn't mean it hurts any less._

Jules hugs me tightly, and then I hear her whispering:

_-You'll be fine eventually, and this pain you're feeling now will pass too. Take your time if that's what you need, but I think you should talk to him after that... Maybe he doesn't love you as you would like, but it's a fact that he cares about you._

I stir Jules' hair lovingly and give her my best smile.

_-I'll be fine._ -I whisper in her ear, trying to convince myself that I will be.

[ ](https://ibb.co/HKtzyKw)

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

He breathed a sigh of frustration as he slid his cell phone over the kitchen counter. It had been several days since Keith had left, and it was clear that his anger had not diminished one iota.

_-Jodeeer!_ -he hissed, bringing his hands to his head. 

He was sad by the way Keith had left. He understood perfectly well that Keith didn't want anything to do with him, but deep down, he wanted to find a way to keep his friendship. 

_"You can't have everything in this life,"_ Omar heard a little voice in his head, and he knew that sadly it was true.

The last few weeks had been by far the best Omar had ever had, and that was because he and Ander had found each other again, but he couldn't feel completely happy until he could talk to Keith.

In a fit of desperation, he put on his jacket and left his apartment. _"If the mountain doesn't go to Mohammed, Mohammed will go to the mountain,"_ he whispered, feeling a turn in his stomach.

By the time he reached Keith's apartment, the sun had already set. He looked at the window and noticed that no light was on. Still, he rang the bell a couple of times and waited. After five minutes without a response, he had to accept that Keith wasn't home. It was Friday, so the chances that he had gone out to party were high, but he sat on the building's entrance steps and decided to wait.

While he was doing so, he received a message from Nadia telling him that she and Guzman would pick him up at the airport. Both had agreed not to tell their parents because they wanted to surprise them with his visit. He had already bought his plane ticket, and everything was all set for him to travel to Madrid the next day.

After half an hour of waiting, he finally gave up and made his way back to his apartment. When he arrived at the subway station, his cell phone started ringing. A goofy smile settled on his face as he saw that it was Ander calling.

_-Hey..._ -He greeted him, slowing down.

Omar could hear laughter and reggaeton music on the other side of the line, and seconds later, he heard Ander's voice two tones louder to make himself heard:

_-What are you doing?_

_-Nothing really. I'm going to my place._

_-Ya... I called you because I'm at a party with some friends from college and... I thought maybe you'd like to come... You know, a typical frat party. Maybe it's not the best plan, but since you're flying to Madrid tomorrow, I thought we could see each other for a while._

Omar smiled as he heard him. Ander knew the date of his trip, but he thought he'd forgotten it and wouldn't see him again until he got back from Madrid, so Ander calling him had made him forget for a moment the disappointment of not finding Keith. Since their encounter in the cafeteria, he and Ander had been in constant communication; they saw each other or sent each other messages almost daily, which made him hopeful.

_-Vale, it sounds like fun_. -He muttered.

_-Perfect!_ -He heard Ander respond enthusiastically. _-I'm sending you the address; it's near your place, so I'll see you in a while, okay?_

_-Vale..._ -He was about to hang up when he heard Ander's voice again.

_-Omar?_

_-Yes?_

_-Don't take too long..._

Omar felt his pulse racing in anticipation of seeing him again. He hung up and checked the address. He got into the wagon, imagining all the possibilities that night might bring. On the way, he stared absently at the people around him, reminiscing about the last time they had seen each other.

Two days earlier, Ander had invited him to watch him train, and Omar had accepted gladly. By the time he arrived, Ander was already training, so Omar took a seat on a bench to watch him play. Ander had improved his game a lot and was by far superior to the rest of his teammates. Secretly, Omar felt proud, as if Ander's achievements were his own.

When the training was over, Ander had approached him with a big smile, holding the racket as if it were a trophy. He had won the match, and even though it was a training session, he couldn't hide the satisfaction in his eyes. On that occasion, Ander introduced Josh to him as one of his best friends. Omar fleetingly remembered the message Ander had received the night they had broken up, but he quickly put that thought behind him as he was unwilling to go down that road.

When the train's loudspeaker announced that they were arriving at Clark St., Omar stood up and left the car.

When he arrived at the party, the place was packed. There were motorcycles and cars parked on the main street, and as he approached the entrance, the music and laughter grew louder. He entered the house and took a look, but when he realized that it would take a while to find him, he chose to send a message telling Ander that he was there. After a few minutes, Ander went out to meet him. Ander looked a little tipsy from the alcohol, and when he managed to make eye contact with him, Ander's lips curled up in a frank smile.

_-Hey... you made it!_ -He muttered, reaching out to him for a brief hug _. -I'm glad you're here; come, I want you to meet my friends._ \- Ander said to him against his neck.

Before Omar could respond, Ander took him by the hand and began to make his way through the people. Omar was barely aware of what was going on around him; he felt as if his skin was burning because of Ander's fingers' pressure interlocking his. With his thumb, Omar gently caressed Ander's palm, feeling it rough to the touch from so many hours of tennis training. He would have liked that moment to last all night, but Ander released his hand when they found with his friends, leaving him with a sense of loss.

_-Hey, guys, this is Omar... a friend of mine._

_-Omar, these are my friends. Josh, who you already knew..._ -Ander said, as Omar shook Josh's hand. - _This is Tom, my roomie, and his girlfriend, Jenny. And these are Nate and Steph._

_-Nice to meet you, man._ -Tom greeted him with a big smile. - _Where do you know each other from? Do you go to NYU too?_

_-Yeah, I just graduated from Audiovisual Communication, but we've known each other for a long time ago._ -Omar answered without wanting to go into more detail. Ander would probably be uncomfortable if his friends knew they had been a couple. As he thought about it, Ander's comment confirmed his suspicions.

_-Omar is also from Madrid; we were classmates in the same school._

He didn't know why, but he was a little disappointed that Ander didn't say they had been a couple. He knew it was stupid, and knowing how private he could be about such things, it shouldn't have affected him, but he couldn't help it.

_-Would you like a beer, Omar?_ -Josh asked him, tossing him a Budweiser.

Omar shook his head as he lit a cigarette.

- _Thanks, but I’m ok…_

Since he'd stopped drinking, he'd rarely been to a party, partly to avoid the temptation of alcohol and partly because he didn't really want to go out. He hoped Ander's friends wouldn't insist on it because he didn't want to explain why he didn't drink to people he had just met.

_-Okay..._ -Josh shrugged off his refusal and continued to drink. 

Time flew by. Ander's friends turned out to be very nice and fun, especially Tom, who was by far the center of attention. He was a witty, friendly guy who had reminded him a little of Rebe. He had a biting sense of humor, and much of the night was spent telling jokes and anecdotes in which, in many of them, Ander was the protagonist. 

Omar had sat on one of the couches, and Ander had taken place on the couch in front of him. From time to time, their eyes met, and when that happened, he could see Ander smiling weakly at him and then focusing his attention again on the chit-chat. At some point, Ander stood up and squeezed his shoulder, bent down, and whispered in his ear: _-I'll be right back._

Omar nodded and kept an eye on him until he lost sight of him. He made a great effort not to lose the conversation thread while looking sideways, trying to locate him without success. Omar was about to get up to look for him when he saw him. Ander had a glass in his hand and was walking directly towards him. 

Instead of returning to the place where he had been sitting, Ander chose to sit next to him on the arm of the chair. He carelessly passed one hand over his shoulders as he handed him the glass.

_-It is for you. It's sparkling water._ -He muttered very close to his ear so that no one else would hear.

_-Thanks, nene..._ -His lips curled into a smile as he sipped the bubbly liquid. Under other circumstances, that wouldn't be a big deal, but it did mean a lot to him. That simple gesture made him feel a flutter in his stomach when he understood that Ander cared about him.

Omar lit a cigarette, inhaled a deep breath, and then expelled the smoke by making "rings" with his mouth. Ander took the cigar off his fingers as he used to do when they were together, while he chatted and laughed with his friends. He smoked a couple of times before returning the cigarette to him again. Ander looked happy and relaxed. And seeing him like that, having a good time with these new friends he had made, was something completely new to Omar.

Omar found himself laughing out loud more than once, enjoying himself like he hadn't for a long time. Of course, it had a lot to do with Ander being next to him, rubbing his leg against his, or casually resting his hand on his shoulders. Those innocent touches had him on edge, making him feel alive once again.

Omar looked at his watch and was surprised to realize how late it was. He was having such a good time that he didn't want to leave, but his flight was leaving the next day, and he still had to pack his suitcase and fix a couple of things first. Ander noticed this and asked him quietly:

_-Is everything all right?_

_-Yes. It's just that I think I should leave, as you know, my flight leaves tomorrow, and I still have a few things to do._

_-Yes, of course..._ -He nodded, but Omar did not overlook the disappointment he saw in Ander's eyes.

He was about to say that he could stay a little longer when he heard Tom's voice.

_-Hey, Ander... It looks like that guy has a crush on you! He's been staring at you for over five minutes. He's more your kind of guy!_

Omar felt an unpleasant sensation when he heard Tom, but as he could, he hid it. He looked in the direction Tom had pointed and was stunned. He was mentally grateful to be sitting; otherwise, he was sure his legs would not have held him.

About seven meters away, Keith was watching them without blinking, and next to him were Jules, Matt, and Jackson watching them as well. When Keith realized Omar was aware of his presence, he lowered his head and began to walk away. Almost immediately, he felt Ander remove his hand that had been resting on his shoulders for the last few minutes and move slightly away. Omar turned to look at him and what he saw in Ander's eyes made him shudder.

Ander's lips were tight, and the smile had completely disappeared from his face. He saw him take a sip of his beer before looking at him again. Omar felt between a rock and a hard place. On the one hand, he didn't want Ander to think that Keith could continue to be an obstacle in this budding friendship that they were rebuilding, but on the other hand, he couldn't let Keith leave like that after all he had done for him. It was his chance to talk to him and set things straight between them.

_-Ander... I need to talk to him._ -He mused, touching Ander's arm.

Ander let out a mocking smile that was imperceptible to the eyes of others, but not to Omar. He curled his lips down in a grimace as he nodded.

_-Aha..._ -he answered sharply. _-You don't have to give me any explanation... after all, we're just friends._

_-Jodeeer, Ander... please try to understand._

_-I'm going to the bathroom..._ -He muttered, standing up, and without looking back, he started to walk away.

Omar sighed, bringing his hands to his face. When he opened his eyes, he saw that Tom and Josh were looking at him curiously. They hadn't missed a single detail of what had just happened, but they didn't dare tell him anything.

_-I'll be right back..._ -He muttered, walking away from them.

It was time to make a decision. He stopped for a few seconds looking in both directions. He could follow Keith, who had headed for the exit, or head for the restrooms to go after Ander. He let go of the air he was holding and, clenching his jaw, began to walk away with steady steps.

*******


	42. It's always been you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!
> 
> Chapter 42 is ready. I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> As always, I wanna thank you for being here.
> 
> xoxo 💙🖤

*******

_-Ander... I need to talk to him._ -He mused, touching Ander's arm.

Ander let out a mocking smile that was imperceptible to the eyes of others, but not to Omar. He curled his lips down in a grimace as he nodded.

_-Aha..._ -he answered sharply. _-You don't have to give me any explanation... after all, we're just friends._

_-Jodeeer, Ander... please try to understand._

_-I'm going to the bathroom..._ -He muttered, standing up, and without looking back, he started to walk away.

Omar sighed, bringing his hands to his face. When he opened his eyes, he saw that Tom and Josh were looking at him curiously. They hadn't missed a single detail of what had just happened, but they didn't dare tell him anything.

_-I'll be right back..._ -He muttered, walking away from them.

It was time to make a decision. He stopped for a few seconds looking in both directions. He could follow Keith, who had headed for the exit, or head for the restrooms to go after Ander. He let go of the air he was holding and, clenching his jaw, began to walk away with steady steps.

*******

**Chapter 42. It** **'s always been you**

**_(Ander)_ **

Ander slammed the door and leaned against it. He held his hands up to his eyelids as he made a great effort to calm down. After a few seconds, he walked to the sink to pour cold water on his face and neck. As he looked at his reflection in the mirror, thinking about what he should do, he heard incessant banging against the door.

_-Occupied! Jodeeer!_ -he shouted, wiping his face with a paper towel.

The night had been perfect until that asshole had appeared. Of all the fucking college parties that night, he had to show up at this one. For a moment, he had managed to forget all the bad things that still hung between him and Omar, and during those hours, he had believed that there was a real possibility that they could try again. He was no fool, and he could see that Omar wanted the same thing as he did. He knew this from the way he had reacted to their closeness. He had felt that electricity growing between them, becoming more and more intense as the night wore on.

On purpose, he had taken Omar by the hand, dragging him among the people, and had imagined for a moment that they were a couple again, and perhaps, for that reason, he had unconsciously not been able to stop touching him the entire night. Since Omar had returned to his life, he repeatedly told himself that he should take it easy. That he should not allow himself to become hopeful again if he did not want to be hurt once more. 

But only one look was enough, for his determination had been shattered. Even after so many years, Omar still had the same effect on him, and he had the power to reduce him to nothing with one action. And today, more than ever, Omar had shown him again that he was not, and would not be his priority.

Once again, the knocks on the door were heard, this time with greater force. And at that moment, an idea crossed his mind.

_"Could there be a possibility that he was wrong?" "Could it be that Omar had chosen to go after him to let him know that he really wanted to try?"_

He smiled slightly as he felt something inside him stir. He released the air slowly with nervousness and threw the towel in the trash can before opening the door.

It wasn't Omar who had knocked. Outside there was a long line of people waiting to go into the bathroom, and when they saw him come out, they began to scold him because of the time he had been locked up. Ander ignored them because the last thing he wanted to do was start a stupid fight, so he merely glared at them, frowning. 

As he approached his friends, disappointment grew within him as he realized that Omar had left. He tried to show his best smile by suppressing the immense desire he had to run out and find him.

_-Are you okay, Ander?_ -Josh asked, approaching him.

_-Yes... Why?_ -He answered by playing dumb.

_-Are you sure? Because your expression says otherwise..._

_-Come on, don't be a pain and hand me a beer..._ \- He asked, grimacing.

Josh shrugged and did what Ander had asked. Ander opened it and sipped it while he scanned the place, trying uselessly to find Omar. 

_"Well, that's it. You just got your answer."_ -He mocked mentally, trying not to show how much it was affecting him.

_-Where's Omar?_ -Tom asked, ten minutes later.

_-Do I look like I'm his babysitter?_ -he replied reluctantly.

- _Oops! Someone here is pissed off.._. -Tom mocked. - _I thought he was with you, dude, because he left almost after you did._

_-Well, as you see, he's not._

He knew his friends weren't to blame for what happened and that he wasn't fair by behaving so rudely, but he wasn't in the mood to be questioned. He left the beer half-drunk and decided he'd had enough for that night.

He went over to Tom and ran his arm around his shoulders in an attempt to let him know he was sorry for his outburst.

_-Hey... I'm sorry._ -He mused.

Tom bumped his head gently against Ander's and nodded.

_-It's okay, I get it._

_-Okay... I'll see you later; I'm leaving._

_-I don't think I'll make it tonight..._ -Tom replied with a wink.

Even though his mood was gone, he couldn't help but smile when he heard his friend. 

_-Well, luckily, one of us will have a good time tonight._ -He mumbled with a hint of irony, bumping his fist into Tom's.

He said goodbye to the rest of his pals, who did not attempt to dissuade him because they knew him well and were aware that nothing they said would change his mind. 

When he left the party, and the cold air hit his face, he regretted his decision to leave on his own and not wait for Josh. It was late, so he would have to walk several blocks before finding an open subway station to take him to campus because taking a cab was not an option due to how expensive it was... besides, he had no rush to get there either. He needed some time alone to think.

He lit a cigarette and, discouraged, began to walk at a slow pace. There was no sign of Omar; he had simply vanished. He only checked his cell phone to confirm that he didn't have any calls or messages from him. _"Maybe he's fucking him right now,"_ he thought bitterly, feeling jealousy consuming him. _"You're an asshole... it seems like you'll never learn."_ He said to himself as he expelled the cigarette smoke.

He had barely gone a block and a half when he heard some quick steps coming up behind him. He stepped aside without turning around so that whoever it was could continue on his way. 

_-Ander! -Wait!_ -He heard Omar's deep voice.

Ander stopped short, clenching his jaw, but didn't turn around. He stood there, staring down, thinking of all the things he would like to say to him. He felt Omar's hand grabbing his arm, followed by a slight tug to force him to look at him. Ander released himself with some abruptness before facing him.

_-What do you want?_ -He replied with a tired gesture.

_-I want us to talk..._

_-Now you want to talk, really?_ -He mocked.

_-Ander... please, I want you to listen to what I have to say... I want to be honest with you once and for all..._ -Omar begged, dropping his hand on Ander's shoulder.

_-Aha... you want to talk to me now because I assume you've already gone after him, right?_

_-Jodeeer! Will you please listen to me? If you don't want to see me again after what I tell you, I won't look for you again._

_-I'm listening..._ -Ander snorted, dropping the cigarette butt to the ground and then stepping on it hard.

_-I needed to talk to him because I don't want to lose his friendship and because he deserved to know the truth._

_-I see... And what is that truth? Please enlighten me!_ -He sneered, hardening his gaze.

_-The truth is that I'm very fond of him because ever since I met him... Keith has always been there for me. In my darkest moments, it was he who made me see that I was capable of moving forward..._

Ander felt as if Omar had punched him in the pit of his stomach. Despite the time apart, Omar still had the power to hurt him. A mixture of emotions took hold of him, and all of them were negative. He felt anger, rage, almost sickly jealousy burning in his soul. 

Knowing that this asshole was someone so important to Omar made him feel sick. He was so jealous of him... he felt that he had taken away Omar's love; he could only think of all those smiles, those kisses, those caresses, that Omar had shared with someone other than himself.

He had never considered himself a violent guy, but at that moment, all he wanted to do was take Omar by the shirt and push him against the concrete wall. He needed to get out all that anger that was killing him. Instead, he clenched his fists and took a deep breath.

_-Terrific! I'm happy for you._ -He hissed, and with a snort, he started to walk away.

_-Ander!_ -Omar stood in his way, forcing him to stop.

_-Leave me alone, okay? I don't feel like listening to you anymore. Really, Omar, I don't give a shit._ -At that point, he was unable to show himself to be calm.

_-Well, you'll have to._ -He challenged him, looking into his eyes, and Ander could see the determination on Omar's face.

- _Finish up, then, so I can get out of here._ -He hissed, holding his gaze.

Ander saw the indecision in Omar's face, but almost immediately, he got himself together.

_-So, despite all Keith's efforts, I could never fall in love with him because it was always you in the end._

Ander took two steps backward when he heard that. 

_-What?_ -He babbled, not quite understanding.

_-That you always were, have been, and will be the man I love. You and no one else... in all this time, I haven't stopped loving you for a single day. And... I understand if you don't feel the same anymore... but I had to tell you, I couldn't keep it to myself anymore._

Ander looked at him in astonishment. He didn't expect Omar to tell him such a thing. He needed to process it... he wanted to make sure he had heard correctly... that he wasn't dreaming.

_-Don't you say anything?_ -Omar whispered, looking down.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

Finally, he had confessed it. Now it was all up to Ander, but the way he looked at him, fear began to take hold of him. Perhaps, because of all the bad things that had happened between them, Ander was no longer willing to try one more time.

_I see..._ -Omar mumbled after several seconds in which Ander remained motionless. - _It seems to me that your silence says everything._

Omar had sworn that Ander still had feelings for him. During the party and the previous weeks since they met again, he could feel it. He turned around and began to walk away, feeling devastated. He had believed that he would never feel this pain again, but apparently, he had been wrong. 

Suddenly, he felt Ander's hands encircling his torso and drawing him towards him. He felt Ander's breath against his neck, and the heat radiating from his body.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-Omar... I haven't stopped loving you either._

Omar turned to look at him in the eyes, and he could see Ander was telling the truth. The way he looked at him said it all.

Ander pushed him against the wall and began to kiss him. Omar couldn't think of anything but the magic that Ander's kisses were working on him; he could feel his pulse racing minute by minute under Ander's skillful touch. Ander's mouth was warm and demanding and tasted like a combination of alcohol and mint.

He could feel Ander's tongue pushing its way between his lips to claim his own. Ander's hands slipped through his hair, caressing the back of his neck, while he felt the strength of his hips rubbing against his own, making the pressure of the fabric of his pants against his cock frankly unbearable.

_-Joder! I love you... More than you can imagine..._ -Ander whispered against his mouth.

A spiral of pleasant sensations ran through his body; Ander still loved him... the arousal was taking over him with every caress Ander lavished on him, making him completely forget where they were; the dense and intoxicating smell of Ander's lotion combined with his skin clouded his senses. The firm pressure of Ander's body against his own was much more than he could bear. He did not realize how much he had missed hearing those three words and how vivid they made him feel.

Someone shouting, _"Hey! You two, get a room!"_ forced them to stop in their tracks. Both were breathing heavily; Omar opened his eyes and found Ander's penetrating gaze.

_-Ander..._ -He moaned against his lips. He wanted him; he wanted Ander so much that it hurt. His flat was relatively close, so without thinking twice, he asked, _"Would you like to go to my place?_ -Ander nodded, reluctantly letting him go. 

They arrived in record time. They had barely spoken the whole way; it seemed neither of them wanted to spoil that moment with words. As soon as they entered and Omar closed the door, Ander was on top of him. Omar's back hit the door while the two smothered each other with kisses. He had wanted so badly to feel Ander's lips again that he was no longer able to contain himself.

Their caresses were urgent and needy; Ander's hands went through his body, trying to undress him. Omar did the same. Within seconds, both were naked from the torso and unable to keep their hands off each other. Their tongues played with each other; kisses were careless and hungry. Unable to restrain himself for another second, Omar's hand went down to Ander's belt buckle. With nimble fingers, he unbuckled his pants and slid his hand inside.

Feeling Ander's hard cock against his fingers again was the best aphrodisiac that could exist. Ander groaned as he felt Omar's firm fist clamped him between his fingers. With his thumb, Omar began to caress Ander's tip, sliding the precum. Omar could feel the moisture in his own underwear and could only think of feeling Ander inside him again.

Omar was going crazy, so, making a huge effort, he separated from him; he took Ander by the hand and dragged him to his room. There, he took off his pants and underwear in one movement and saw Ander imitating him. Now there was no barrier between them, and for some seconds, he allowed himself to contemplate Ander's naked body. He was so fucking perfect that he could spend the whole night admiring him.

Ander walked the three steps that separated them and pushed him slightly to make him fall against the bed. Omar pulled on him as he approached, hugging his neck and raising his head to meet his lips. 

_-I missed you so much._ -Omar whispered before Ander started kissing him again.

This time, Ander's kiss was slow and deep, making him feel a growing urge in every pore of his skin. They were both so fucking hard that they enjoyed the feeling of rubbing against each other. As the two kissed and moved to stimulate each other, Omar thought of the perfect synchronicity between them. They knew each other so well that it didn't matter how long they had been apart, as their caresses and movements were as spontaneous and natural as breathing. 

Omar stroked Ander's back along his spine, concentrating on certain points. He knew Ander's erogenous zones perfectly, so he smiled, satisfied, feeling how he reacted under his hands. Then, he grabbed his ass and, opening his legs wider, pressed Ander against him in an attempt to make him see how much he needed him. No one had ever made him feel what Ander made him feel; no one knew his body as Ander did, and for that reason, he had never desired any other guy with the intensity with which he desired Ander.

Ander's eyes were clouded with desire, and with his teeth and tongue, he began to run across his chest. Omar knew he would leave marks, and just imagining it made him even hornier.

_-Nene, fuck me, please..._ -He hissed. - _I need to feel you inside me now._

Ander paused for a few seconds, and Omar thought he saw a hint of hesitation in his gaze but quickly pushed the thought away. Ander leaned up, holding himself with his arms, and that allowed Omar to open the drawer of the bedside table to take out a condom and the tube of lube. Omar handed them to him and continued to kiss Ander's neck as he opened his legs to receive him. He heard the "click" of the lube lid as it opened and saw Ander tear the aluminum condom wrapper with his teeth.

Involuntarily, his cock began to drip and throb in anticipation, so, unable to contain himself, he began to gently jerk off while waiting anxiously to feel Ander's cock slip inside him. When he felt the contrast of the cold gel and Ander's warm fingers caressing him, he let out a moan of pleasure. It had been so long since the last time that he was afraid he would not be able to control himself and cum as soon as Ander sank into him.

_-Mierda!_ -Ander mumbled in a shallow voice.

Omar's senses were numb with excitement, so he could barely register what Ander had said. When he felt the absence of Ander's fingers inside him, the emptiness he experienced forced him to open his eyes. Ander was on his knees in front of him with the condom in his hand, unable to hide the frustration on his face. Omar looked down at Ander's cock, and saw that it was losing firmness.

_-I'm sorry…_ -Ander whispered, walking away from him.

Ander sat down on the edge of the bed with his back to him. Something was wrong, so wrong, but Omar's mind could not understand what was happening. The sex between them had always been spectacular, so seeing Ander like that had left him speechless. He approached him, and touching him on the shoulder, managed to formulate the question:

_-Ander... What's going on?_

Ander remained silent for a few seconds before turning slowly to look at him. He had an indecipherable expression and letting out a sigh, Omar heard him whisper:

_-Forgive me, Omar, but I can't... can we try some other time?_

*******


	43. Ghost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,
> 
> Chapter 43 is here. This is my Christmas gift; I hope you enjoy it!
> 
> Thank you for all the encouraging feedback throughout this rough year.
> 
> Merry Christmas to you all! I hope you're safe and happy! 🎄
> 
> Much love and gratitude! My best wishes to all of you!
> 
> xoxo 🖤💙

*******

_-I'm sorry…_ -Ander whispered, walking away from him.

Ander sat down on the edge of the bed with his back to him. Something was wrong, so wrong, but Omar's mind could not understand what was happening. The sex between them had always been spectacular, so seeing Ander like that had left him speechless. He approached him, and touching him on the shoulder, managed to formulate the question:

_-Ander... What's going on?_

Ander remained silent for a few seconds before turning slowly to look at him. He had an indecipherable expression and letting out a sigh, Omar heard him whisper:

_-Forgive me, Omar, but I can't... can we try some other time?_

*******

**Chapter 43. Ghost**

**_(Ander)_ **

Nothing like this had ever happened to him, especially not with Omar. If there was one thing he was sure of, it was the love he felt for him and how much he turned on just kissing him. For that reason, he had no idea how to deal with the frustration he was experiencing at the time. Since Omar had confessed to him that he had not stopped loving him for a single moment, something inside him had been released.

It took a few minutes for him to process it, but he was sure about what he wanted to do once he understood the scope of those words. He remembered the feeling of well-being he experienced when he held Omar in his arms again and the feeling of fullness when he confessed in a whisper how much he loved him too.

From then on, everything had gone downhill. It had been a flood of emotions that was impossible to stop. The hungry kisses, the need to feel him close, the feeling of tasting Omar's naked skin again... everything had been fucking hot, until the exact moment when Omar asked him to fuck him.

The sight of Omar squirming with pleasure under his caresses, begging him to sink into him, was enough for his brain to betray him with grotesque images of Omar and Keith in countless different positions, fucking like maniacs. The mere thought that this asshole had stolen his place and that he had had Omar willing to give himself up to him was enough to block him. That thought acted like a bucket of cold water, torturing him in such a way that he had been unable to stay hard.

He knew that, like him, Omar had been with other guys before, and while it was not something he liked to remember, it had never been an issue between them. But this time, it was different because it wasn't a random fuck; what had existed between Omar and that asshole involved feelings. And if he was honest with himself, he wasn't clear about what hurt him the most, whether his ego was hurt by knowing that Omar had enjoyed with another guy who wasn't him or the pain of feeling displaced. But whatever the reason, he was insanely jealous.

_-Ander..._ -Omar's voice distracted him from his speculations.

Ander knew he had to tell Omar what was happening to him, but he didn't feel able to do so at the time. He didn't want to start an argument when not an hour had passed since they had confessed that they still loved each other. Maybe if he would just try a little harder and left behind those ridiculous dramas, he could move on and wouldn't have to worry that something like this would happen to him again.

Now he wanted to seize that moment alone with Omar, and if he couldn't get a hard-on, he could at least hug him like in the old days until they both fell asleep.

_-Hey..._ -He smiled halfheartedly before speaking. _-Will you forgive me? I'm just a little tired, and I think I drank a little too much._

_-I have nothing to forgive you.._. -Omar mused. 

Ander felt awful, and he could notice how affected Omar was too, but he needed to get his thoughts not to let them get to him anymore.

- _Could we just lie on the bed for a while?_ -He asked quietly. 

He saw Omar look down before nodding.

Ander lay down on the bed, and opening his arms, waved for him to curl up between them. Omar didn't hesitate and walked over to him. Ander wrapped his torso around him, and with his fingertips, began to trace soft caresses over his skin. For several minutes neither of them said anything until after a while, Ander mumbled:

_-I know your flight leaves in a few hours, but if you don't mind, I'd like to spend the night here with you. I can leave very early tomorrow morning..._

_-That would be nice... And you don't need to go; you can stay here..._ -Omar muttered, kissing him on the arm.

_-Vale..._ -Ander whispered, closing his eyes. He felt so cozy with Omar in his arms that he allowed himself to enjoy that moment until Omar's worried voice made him open his eyes.

_-Ander... What's wrong? Tell me the truth..._ -He turned to look at him. - _Do I no longer turn you on? Is that it? Did you realize you don't feel the same way about me as you used to?_

Omar couldn't hide the anguish reflected in his eyes, so Ander rushed to get him out of his mistake.

_-Come on... Don't say that! Of course not._

_-If it's not that, then what's wrong with you? Sex between us has always been awesome, and it's been months since we last fucked... So, are you really going to tell me it's because you're tired?_

Ander bit his lips, looking away.

_-If it's really true that your feelings towards me haven't changed, and if we want to do things right this time, you should tell me what's really going on with you..._

Ander took a deep breath. Omar was right. If he wanted things to work out between them, he needed to be honest with him. He needed to tell him what was troubling him. He leaned against the headboard and began playing nervously with the pillow he was holding in his lap.

_-You're right... that's not what happens to me_. -He muttered after a while.

_-What is it then?_ -Omar was sitting in front of him and had started biting his nails without realizing it.

Ander looked him in the eye and confessed:

_-That I'm crazy with jealousy... jodeeer! That I can't get it out of my head that that asshole fucked you._

Omar's face reflected surprise. It was a fact that he hadn't considered it; Ander saw him clenching his jaw tightly and biting his bottom lip.

_-Ander... I didn't know it would hurt you..._ -Omar whispered, holding Ander's hand. _-And maybe what I'm about to tell you won't help much, but... during all this time we were together, he never fucked me._

Ander let go of Omar's hand and started rubbing his eyelids, trying to process what Omar had just told him. A few seconds later, he looked at him, studying his features. He wanted to believe him, but what Omar was saying seemed implausible. Perhaps he had said it because he knew that was what he wanted to hear. After all, he couldn't believe that, during all that time, it hadn't happened.

_-Ander, look at me_. -Omar whispered. _-I'm telling you the truth. I could never give myself to him because something was holding me back from doing it. And those were my feelings for you._

_-Are you serious?_ -Ander whispered, losing himself in the depths of Omar's gaze.

_-I couldn't do it... That's the truth._

- _Are you saying that during all these months, you two never had sex? I'm sorry, but I don't believe you..._

_-Hey! Listen to me... That's not what I said. I'm not going to lie to you; we did have sex, yes... but not as often as you imagine. And the few times we did, he never fucked me._

Ander had a dry mouth. He wanted to end that talk because it was still painful to hear even if it were true. 

_-Ya..._ -He mumbled. - _You probably think this is all bullshit... And even more so because when you first came to live in this city, and I stayed in Madrid, we both had an open relationship... but this time it's different. With him, it's different, Omar..._

_-I know... and I'm sorry._ -Omar mumbled. _-I just want you to know that now that I know what's wrong with you, we can get through it together._

_-Really? How?_

Omar shrugged his shoulders and smiled, causing the atmosphere to relax a bit.

_-Well, I don't care if we have to wait... I mean, you know I'm crazy about having sex with you, but that's not the most important thing to me... If you just hold me and tell me you love me, that's enough for me..._

_-Are you sure, Omar?_

_-I am... Besides, it won't be like that forever, right?_ -Omar joked, making Ander laugh too. - _Although... we can always find the way... you know how much I like it when we swap roles... and you too if I remember correctly._

- _You asshole..._ -Ander grinned, patting him on the head, and then he drew him and kissing him briefly on the lips. - _That would be nice..._

_-What?_ -Omar smiled against Ander's lips. - _Waiting or swapping roles?_

_-Both._ -Ander smiled, settling into his arms. 

They lay down again, and this time it was Omar who snuggled him in his arms. 

He was falling asleep when he heard Omar's voice calling him.

_-Nene..._

_-Huh?_ -He hummed.

_-Were you already asleep?_ -Omar asked against his earlobe.

_-I was..._

_-I'm sorry, go back to sleep_. -Omar mused, hugging him again.

_-Omar, spit it out now. I know you won't sleep if you don't tell me_. -He reasoned, breaking out of Omar's embrace as he drowned out a yawn.

_-I guess you know me well._

_-You still doubted it?_

_-I was thinking... eh... how do you want us to continue from now on?_

Listening to him, Ander couldn't stop his pulse from racing. Of course, he had thought about it, but he hadn't dared to say it out loud. And the fact that Omar asked about it warmed his heart. However, he pretended not to understand.

- _I don't get it, Omar. What do you mean?_

_-Well, that... I want to know where we stand._ _Are we together now... or...?_

Ander curved his lips in a frank smile as he saw Omar struggling to find the words. When he couldn't hold back any longer, he burst out laughing.

_-You are an asshole! Of course, you knew what I was talking about..._ -Omar complained, pretending to be upset.

Ander stopped laughing, adopting a serious gesture, and then, he said in a low voice, _-I want to be your boyfriend, Omar. That's the only thing I'm sure of._

Omar was silent, looking at him without blinking.

_-I want us to be together..._ -Ander emphasized, suddenly feeling nervous. - _I hope that it's what you..._

Omar cut him short by kissing him.

_-I want that too_. -Omar mumbled against his lips. _-That's all I ever wanted._

_-Joder... For a moment, I thought you were going to tell me to take it easy._ -Ander opened up.

_-No fucking way, nene. We've already wasted too much time apart. Now what I want is for us to get it back._

Ander smiled as Omar pulled him towards him to kiss him gently on the lips. Ander fell asleep in Omar's arms, turning over and over a single thought. 

_"Boyfriends... We are dating again."_

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_From @piper_ayuso Ig Account_

*******


	44. A long wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, everyone!
> 
> Chapter 44 is here. Hope you like it. 
> 
> Thanks as always for reading, commenting, and/or leaving Kudos! That makes my day!
> 
> @Angel2912 Happy Birthday, dear!!! 
> 
> xoxo

*******

Ander stopped laughing, adopting a serious gesture, and then, he said in a low voice, _-I want to be your boyfriend, Omar. That's the only thing I'm sure of._

Omar was silent, looking at him without blinking.

_-I want us to be together..._ -Ander emphasized, suddenly feeling nervous. - _I hope that it's what you..._

Omar cut him short by kissing him.

_-I want that too_. -Omar mumbled against his lips. _-That's all I ever wanted._

_-Joder... For a moment, I thought you were going to tell me to take it easy._ -Ander opened up.

_-No fucking way, nene. We've already wasted too much time apart. Now what I want is for us to get it back._

Ander smiled as Omar pulled him towards him to kiss him gently on the lips. Ander fell asleep in Omar's arms, turning over and over a single thought. 

_"Boyfriends... We are dating again."_

*******

**Chapter 44. A long wait**

**_(Ander)_ **

He woke up because of the sun's rays that were filtering through the large window. In the past, Omar's old custom of leaving the curtains open had been the cause of heated discussions between them. Not only when Omar moved in with him and his mother, but also when, months later, Ander stayed overnight with Omar in his small apartment in Madrid. When Ander reproached him about it -covering his head with a pillow-, Omar always ended up saying that he should thank him since that way they could make better use of the day by not sleeping more than necessary.

Ander had to admit that Omar had always been a wonderful boyfriend; he was the sweetest and most loving of the two and was almost always willing to please him. When he wanted to get his way, all it took was a kiss or a pouting glance to make Omar sigh and give in to whatever Ander asked. 

But when it came to the curtains, Omar had been relentless from the beginning. So, after countless arguments, Ander had given up. The only thing he had managed to negotiate was that on Saturday nights, the curtains remain closed so that on Sundays, both of them could stay up frolicking in bed almost until noon.

He left that memory behind, and for a few seconds, he allowed himself to enjoy that warm feeling of the sun's rays caressing his skin. Still, with his eyes closed, he stretched out his arm looking for Omar but instead, he found the sheets wrinkled and an empty space beside him. He opened one eye, but the blinding light forced him to close it again, causing him to grunt.

He hadn't slept as long and as well as that night, and he knew exactly why. Just remembering the talk he and Omar had the night before was enough to put a dumb smile on his face. He stood very still, trying to hear any sound that indicated Omar had not yet left, but he could only recognize the typical sounds coming from the street.

The apartment was completely silent. The only trace Omar had left was the delicate aroma of coffee coming from the kitchen. He put one hand to his head, trying to comb out his messy curls, while with the other hand, he began to caress his cock absently. After a few jolts, he was totally hard and frustrated because of what had happened the night before. When his stomach started to growl, reminding him that many hours had passed since he had last eaten, he put that annoying memory out of his mind and sat up in bed.

He stretched out his arms to wake up completely as he yawned in drowsiness. Once his eyes got used to the bright light, he quickly scanned the floor to find his boxers, but couldn't see them anywhere. It was not until he looked over the dresser that he found not only his boxers but also the rest of his carefully folded clothes. He smiled as he imagined Omar lifting them off the floor and folding them neatly as he watched him sleep. 

He jumped to his feet and walked lazily to get dressed. He put on the boxers he had worn the night before, and as he was about to grab his T-shirt, an idea crossed his mind. He opened the dresser drawer, and right in front of him were all of Omar's perfectly folded T-shirts. He giggled, imagining the look on Omar's face when he mocked him by comparing him to Marie Kondo. He picked out a light blue cotton shirt, and before passing it over his head, he held it up to his nose. It smelled like soap, but it also smelled like Omar. He picked up his cell phone, and as he sighed, left the room, heading for the kitchen.

It was past noon, which meant that Omar would be crossing the Atlantic by now. He grimaced at the thought that it would be two weeks before they could see each other again. He went straight to the cupboard and picked out a huge white mug with the phrase _"Kiss me, I'll explain later."_ He filled it almost flush, and then he dropped on one of the stools in front of the kitchen counter.

He took a sip of the steaming coffee, letting the heat of the drink flood his body. He was thinking about the events of the last few hours when a perfectly folded sheet of paper, along with a key clipped to that keychain he knew so well, caught his attention. He put the mug aside and unfolded the sheet, smiling as he recognized Omar's handwriting.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

During all the time he read the note, Ander did not stop smiling for a single moment. He took the keychain in the shape of a lock, and playing with it between his fingers, he stood up to warm up the toast. He hadn't felt this happy in a long time, and he hoped that this happiness would last a long time. He was aware there were still a couple of things they would have to work out, but he hoped that the love they had for each other would be strong enough to overcome anything.

Fifteen minutes later, he finished his breakfast; he washed the plate and poured himself another cup of coffee. He laid down on the couch and called Omar. After three ring tones, he heard Omar's voice through the voice mail, _"I'm busy right now, and I can't answer you, so you know what to do..."_ -Ander shook his head slightly, curving his lips in a smile, and began recording a message.

_"Hey... I wanted to tell you that I read the note you left me and... I miss you too, Omar. It seems these two weeks will take forever. Call me when you hear my message, vale? Te quiero..."_

He spent some time on the couch enjoying the view, admiring the Brooklyn Bridge, and reminiscing about the times he walked there with Omar. He also remembered the lock they put on the bridge and the disappointment he experienced when he saw it had been removed. Time flew by, and when he realized it, the coffee had already cooled.

He got up from the couch and decided it was time to leave. As for Omar's suggestion to stay in his apartment for those two weeks, the truth is that he wasn't sure it was a good idea since Keith's ghost was always present. He went back to the room, and as he looked at the bed with the sheets scramble, the image of Omar fucking Keith in that same bed assaulted him again. 

_“Mierdaaa ... Get over it, jodeeer!"_ -He mumbled angrily, dismissing the thought.

He undressed and went into the bathroom. The first thing he saw was the toothbrush Omar had left him, and without being able to help it, a bitter thought crossed his mind.

_"I'm sure that asshole had a toothbrush too here."_ -He mumbled something unintelligible and went into the shower, letting the water pressure massage his body. When he came out, he felt much calmer. He dried up and began to dress without rushing.

_"It doesn't matter... he's gone, and now it's you who is with Omar_... -Ander said to his reflection in the mirror. 

Once he finished brushing his teeth, he dropped his toothbrush in the container next to Omar's. A smile spread across his lips as he saw the two toothbrushes stacked side by side. It was silly, but for some strange reason, that image made him believe that there could be a future where the two of them would be together.

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

The flight was practically packed, but it seemed that luck was in his favor since the two seats next to him were empty. So once the pilot announced that they had reached ten thousand feet, Omar unbuckled his belt and stretched his legs more comfortably. 

The last twenty-four hours had been madness, and he was sure he would need a little more time to process everything that had happened. He still found it hard to believe that he and Ander had made up, and although it seemed like a dream come true, he knew that it wouldn't be all that simple. 

Omar just had to remember the frustration and fear he experienced when Ander stopped at the horniest moment. The minutes that went by without him knowing why Ander had stopped had been fucking distressing, thinking that Ander was no longer in love with him like he used to be. But once Omar knew the reason, the truth is that it wasn't any more liberating either.

He never thought that his relationship with Keith would affect Ander to the extent that he didn't want to or couldn't fuck him -depending on how he wanted to see it-, but the truth is that it made him feel awful. Probably in other circumstances, Ander's jealousy would have seemed adorable to him, but today it wasn't even fucking funny.

The image of Keith appeared in his mind, making him feel a twinge of guilt. The conversation with Keith had not gone the way he would have liked, but at least Omar had managed to tell him how sorry he was for the way things had ended between them.

_"Leave me alone! Can't you see I'm not interested in talking to you? -Keith had yelled at him without hesitation when he realized that Omar had followed him._

_"Keith... Please, I'm just asking you to give me a chance to explain..."_

_"What, Omar? That you don't feel about me the way, I feel about you? I got it... It is enough to see how you look at him... you never looked at me that way."_

_"I'm so sorry..."_

_"Believe me, so do I..."_

_"I wanted to, but I couldn't...and I don't want you to think that I used you or that I took advantage of you..."_

_"I'll get over it... It's not the first or the last time something like this will happen._

_"Keith, I don't want to lose your friendship. You're someone important to me, and I'm hurt by what's happening._

_"And what do you want me to say, Omar? I can't stand seeing you with him... I can't be your friend right now... even if I wanted to."_

_Keith was right. He couldn't be so fucking selfish asking him to be friends when he knew exactly how he felt._

_"Forgive me."_

_"Good luck, Omar."_

_Omar had stood there, unable to say anything else. As he watched Keith walk away, he only wished that in time they would be able to find their way back to that friendship they had originally forged._

Omar closed his eyes and tried to leave that memory behind because he felt a twist in his stomach every time he thought of Keith. The voice of the flight attendant, asking him if he wanted something to drink, made him open his eyes. Thanking her, he shook his head and closed his eyes to fall into a deep sleep.

The Madrid-Barajas Airport was bursting at the seams. People going and coming back and forth, pulling suitcases or just waiting to catch their flight. He picked up his luggage and headed for the exit to meet Guzman and Nadia. As he had arrived a little earlier, he lit a cigarette and sat down to wait for them. He was about to send a WhatsApp to Ander when he noticed that he had a voice message. He smiled broadly when he heard Ander's voice telling him how much he missed him too.

_< <Hey! I've already landed... I'm waiting for Nadia and Guzmán to come and pick me up. I'll call you when I get to my parents' house. <3 >>_

He sent it off and put his cell phone in his pocket when he saw Guzman's car parked a few meters away from where he was.

_-Hey, Macho! How's my favorite brother-in-law?_ -Guzman greeted him warmly by smiling.

_-I'm the only one you've got, Guzmán.._. -He replied jokingly, hugging him affectionately.

Nadia approached them, with Marina holding her hand, and before Omar could say hello, the girl ran up to him, hugging him by the leg. Nadia smiled at the scene and joined in the group hug.

_-We've missed you so much, Omar._ -Nadia mused against his neck.

The next few hours passed in the blink of an eye. He was happy to be back home after so many months. He had not realized how much he had missed Madrid until he was among his loved ones. Nadia had kept her promise and said nothing about his arrival, so the look on his parents' faces when they saw him was priceless.

His mother hugged him tightly, as she said in Arabic how much she had missed him, and his father - even with his severe appearance - had moistened his eyes when he saw him in front of his door.

They dinned as a family, with Guzmán, Nadia, and his little niece, who was getting bigger and more beautiful. The happy grandparents devoted themselves to Marina, spoiling her in everything that the girl asked of them. Omar smiled as he watched his father transform himself into a loving grandfather with Marina in his arms, and only for a fraction of a second did he imagine what it would be like if he decided to have children in the future.

When they finished dinner, his sister and Guzman said goodbye, promising to pick him up the next day since Rebe had arranged a party at her home to welcome him.

After helping his mother clear the table, Omar went to his old room to unpack and call Ander. Being at his parents' house felt strange but comforting at the same time because even though he had left home many years ago, that feeling of wellness from being with them remained intact. He could remember as if it were yesterday when he shared that same room with Nadia when both were kids who had no idea what the future would bring.

He plopped down on his old bed and stared around him. Everything was as he remembered it. Even some of his old books were there, untouched on the bookshelves. He was about to call Ander when his old man came into the room, so he put his cell phone aside and looked at him expectantly.

_-Baba... I'm glad to see you looking so good._ -He mumbled, feeling a little self-conscious. His father had always imposed on him—a lot.

_-Omar..._ -Yusef said Omar's name with that characteristic accent. _-I'm so happy you came to visit us._

Omar looked at him, pulling the old wooden chair that Nadia usually used when studying for long hours, and sat down in front of him.

_-Look at you..._ -His father whispered after a few seconds _. -You're a man now. How are you doing in the United States? Nadia told me that you are not working now..._

_-Yes, well... Lately, my work was taking up a lot of my time, and the pay wasn't that good. So, I decided to quit and look for something better. I have some money saved up, so... I'm okay, Baba._

His father nodded as he listened to him. And almost immediately, he added:

_-I'm very proud of you, Omar. For all that you have achieved on your own. You completed your degree with a scholarship to one of the best universities, and now you're an independent young man._

_-Thank you, Baba..._

His father grinned as he listened to him, and once again, Omar was surprised when his father spoke again.

_-And tell me... is there someone in your life?_

Omar lowered his head, looking at his feet. What was going on was so surreal that he had to pinch his arm to make sure he wasn't dreaming. _"Was his father asking him about his love life, seriously?"_

_-Baba..._ -He mused, feeling uncomfortable. 

_-Omar, it's been a long time since I left behind all my stupid prejudices. And I know I've never told you this before, but I want you to know that I understood that it doesn't matter which person you choose, as long as that person makes you happy._

By then, Omar was unable to hold back his tears. They ran freely down his cheeks, but they were not tears of sadness; on the contrary, he felt so happy that he simply couldn't stop crying. 

_-Well..._ -Omar stammered, wiping the tears with one hand. _-I'm with Ander again..._ -He whispered very softly. _-I don't know if you remember him... he's the guy who..._

_-I do remember him_. -Yusef interrupted him, drawing a smile. - _And how is he?_

_-He's fine, baba... He's studying architecture and is one semester away from graduating._

_-I see... I'm glad to hear that you two are together... When he comes to Madrid, bring him to the house. Your mother and I will be happy to greet him._

Omar nodded, not knowing what else to say.

_-Omar... I feel very blessed that you are my son._ -His father got up from the chair, and surprisingly, hugged him. - _Good night, son, it has been a long trip, and you will surely be tired._

He never imagined that the first person he would talk about his relationship with Ander would be his father. A few years ago, he would have dismissed that idea in the blink of an eye, but seeing how his father looked at him, made everything different now, and he wanted to share all his dreams with him. Gone was that harsh and punishing father, the one who had once beaten him up for being different. Today, he could look at his father and see the pride reflected on his face.

*******


	45. A bump in the road

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 45 is ready. 
> 
> The truth is this chapter wasn't planned like this (at least the second part), still... hope you like it.
> 
> xoxo 😙

*******

_-Omar... I feel very blessed that you are my son._ -His father got up from the chair, and surprisingly, hugged him. - _Good night son, it has been a long trip, and you will surely be tired._

He never imagined that the first person he would talk about his relationship with Ander would be his father. A few years ago, he would have dismissed that idea in the blink of an eye, but seeing how his father looked at him, made everything different now, and he wanted to share all his dreams with him. Gone was that harsh and punishing father, the one who had once beaten him up for being different. Today, he could look at his father and see the pride reflected on his face.

*******

**Chapter 45. A bump in the road**

**_(Omar)_ **

Those days back home had been a gift. He still couldn't believe that he would be flying back to New York in two more days. Those two weeks in Madrid had gone like water between his fingers, and if it hadn't been for his immense desire to see Ander, he would have stayed another two weeks without hesitation.

It had been incredible to see not only his family but also his friends again. Being able to hug them tightly and not having to settle for talking to them through a screen had made him realize how much he had missed them. To hear Rebe's crazy talk again, to spend time with Samuel talking for long hours, that special complicity he had with Lu... It had been wonderful days by their side, making him feel nostalgic without him being able to avoid it.

He arrived at his parents' house, trying to make as little noise as possible not to wake them up. That night Lu had organized an outing to go to dinner together. Although it was originally a quiet plan, things had gone from bad to worse, and they had ended up at the Barceló Theatre, dancing, drinking, and enjoying themselves to the fullest. When he entered his room, he closed the door behind him and dropped onto the bed.

He didn't know exactly what time it was, but he was sure it was almost dawn. He was slightly dizzy but at the exact limit to feel happy without being drunk. He had been drinking, but in moderation, as he knew he should not overdo it with alcohol because of what had happened to him in the past.

He looked at his cell phone, and when he realized that it was almost five o'clock in the morning, he decided to call Ander. The time difference had been a problem for them to coincide since, between classes and training, Ander had very little time to talk, and when he finished, it was already dawn for Omar. So, the number of times they had spoken was limited, and they had to conform to sending messages to each other daily.

He put on his AirPods and dropped his head on the fluffy pillow, calling him. As soon as he heard Ander's voice greeting him, he closed his eyes and smiled.

_-Hey... What are you doing up at this hour?_

_-Arriving home... Lu organized a group dinner, and after several drinks, we ended up at the Barceló Theatre. What were you doing?_

_-Me? I was reading... Jodeeer, I'd like to be there..._

_-Does that mean you miss me?_ -Omar hummed without being able to hide a smile.

_-You know I do. I want to see you and kiss you..._

_-Really? And what else will you do when you see me?_ -He asked, feeling the adrenaline rush through his body. Ander had the ability to turn him on with just one word.

In response, he only heard him laugh. So, insisting, he asked again.

_-Don't you tell me? I'm getting a hard-on just imagining you... -_ He whispered, taking his hand inside the boxers to start caressing his cock. The idea of having phone sex with Ander made him gasp slightly _. -What do you say we jerk off, nene?_

- _I'd like to... but I can't right now._ -He heard him say it quietly.

_-Why not?_ -Omar asked, stopping his wrist movement.

Ander cleared his throat before speaking.

- _Tom says, hello_. -He said by way of explanation.

_-Joder... Are you staying in the dorms? I thought you were staying in my place_. -He muttered grimacing.

_-Yes, I... I just... I preferred to stay here in the end. There was no point in staying in your apartment alone and taking the subway ride to campus every day._

_-Ya..._ -He reasoned, taking his hand out of his boxers. - _I guess I'll have to wait until I see you then._

-Only two more days to go. -Ander mumbled.

_-Is that a promise?_ -Omar ventured to ask, knowing that Keith's issue was not entirely resolved between them.

_-You bet..._ -Ander answered confidently, making Omar feel butterflies fluttering in his stomach.

_-Hey, tío, I thought it would be cool to see your mom. Do you think that's a good idea?_

_-Yeah, definitely. I'm sure she'd be thrilled to see you._

_-Okay, that's it. Tomorrow I'll stop by your house to say hello._

_-Okay, tell me how it goes. I've to go because Tom wants me to help him with something._

_-Right... Good night._

_-You too. Omar?_

_-Mmh?_

_-I love you..._

Omar smiled as he heard him.

_-And I love you too, nene -He muttered before hanging up._

*******

That night it was a week since he had returned from Madrid, and it was the time they still hadn't fucked. The relationship between the two was a little tense, and it was clear that both he and Ander were doing their best to avoid "that minefield" they were in.

They each had different reasons for feeling bad, and although they had talked about it a couple of times, they hadn't managed to get anywhere. The only thing that could be rescued from the situation was how they had handled it this time with much more maturity and temperance, instead of childish outbursts or hasty decisions as used to happen in the past.

Omar knew that only time would set things right, but since patience was not one of his main virtues, he decided that he would try to solve at least one of those problems that night. From his perspective, the other was much more complex, and he was not in a position to decide it. At least not now.

He took a sip of his beer and leaned against the bar, turning his back on the bartender who had been flirting shamelessly with him since he had arrived. Although he hadn't played along, he had to admit that it was pleasing to know that other guys found him hot. He had texted Ander to meet at _"The Monster,"_ a gay bar near Christopher Street - the quintessential gay area of New York. He looked at his watch and smiled, thinking that Ander would be there soon. As he waited for him, his mind transported him to the afternoon when he returned from Madrid.

_Ander had wanted to go to the airport to meet him, but Omar had dissuaded him from meeting_ _directly at his apartment. When he arrived, Ander was already waiting for him, and as soon as he crossed the threshold of the door, Ander hugged him._

_"Hey... How was your flight?"_

_"It was okay..."_

_Ander had smiled at him by wrapping his arms around his neck before he started kissing him. As soon as their lips made contact, Omar allowed himself to forget for a moment all his worries, even if it was for a moment._

_"You have no idea how much I missed you..." -Ander had whispered against his lips._

_Omar had made an effort to smile back, but it seemed that he had not been convincing enough, as Ander immediately questioned him, taking two steps backward._

_"What's wrong with you?"_

_"We need to talk..." -He had answered him, sitting on the couch. -Come..._

_Ander's face had decomposed when he heard him, and as he sat next to him, Omar had heard him muttering:_

_"You changed your mind..."_

_"What are you saying?" -Ander's words had completely thrown him off balance._

_"That you regret that we are together again..."_

_"Come on, Ander. Don't talk nonsense..."_

_"If that is not it, what is wrong with you?"_

_"I had breakfast with Azucena..."_

_“And? You already told me that you would see her; I don't get the problem..."_

_"She was happy to know that we are together again. And she asked me if that meant that I would also return to Madrid at the end of this year..."_

_As soon as he finished saying those words, he had seen the change in Ander's expression. Ander had looked him straight in the eye for a moment before looking away._

_"Omar... Listen. I would have liked to be the one to tell you, but we didn't have enough time to talk about it. A lot happened that night, and then the next morning, you traveled to Madrid, so I was waiting for you to come back so we could talk._

_"Ya... Well, I'm sure you can imagine what I felt when your mother told me. And now you'll understand why I'm pissed off._

_"I get it, but can we talk about it now, please?"_

_"I guess we could, but I'm not sure I'd like to hear what you're going to say._

_"Omar... Please."_

_"What, Ander? Just tell me something. The decision you made ... is it final?"_

_Ander had been silent for a few seconds before answering._

_"I think so..."_

_"So... What's the point? Nothing I say will change your mind ... Tell me something, why did you tell me you wanted to be my boyfriend if you knew you would be leaving town in a few months?"_

_"Because being your boyfriend is what I want the most, jodeeer! And because I thought maybe you could consider coming back to Madrid with me ..."_

_"What are you saying, tío?"_

_"Omar ... please. Don't say no now. I'm just asking you to think about it. Don't you miss your family, our friends, our country? Do you really see yourself living here for the rest of your life? I mean, this is a cool city; and yes, it's probably a dream of many people, but it's not my dream. I made this decision before you came back into my life._

_"And what if I told you that I am one of those people? That it is my dream to live here._

_"Omar..."_

_"Well, clearly, a long-distance relationship is not an option. You've seen what happened to us last time._

_"I know, and I wouldn't ask. Omar, listen... There's a long way to go this year, and a lot could happen in the meantime, so why don't we stop for now and concentrate on living in the present?_

_"Living in the present, you say..." -He had let out a bitter laugh when he heard Ander._

_"Omar, I only ask you to consider what I have told you..."_

_"Can we just not talk about this anymore, please?_

_He had not known how to react. He had expected to hear Ander say that his mother was wrong, that he had no intention of leaving New York. That he had no intention of leaving him... But he hadn't._

_Return to Madrid? That was something that he hadn't considered, and even if he did, he knew beforehand the answer and the implication it would have on his relationship with Ander. Of course, it was needless to say that that talk had been like a cold-water bucket, killing all the desire he had had to fuck with Ander._

_He left that memory behind when he felt the familiar touch of Ander's hand on his naked shoulder._

_-Hey... -Ander greeted him, raising his voice to make himself heard. -What are we doing here?_

**_(Ander)_ **

_Thirty minutes before_

It was Friday night, so among the people who were leaving work to go home, and so many others, including him, who were going out to party, the subway was a little crowded. He spotted a space and headed there, dodging some passengers. He leaned against the wall of the carriage and pulled out his cell phone. He reread Omar's message, wondering why he had asked to meet him there.

After googling the address, he had a vague idea of Omar's reasons but found it odd that he had chosen precisely a gay bar after the kinda complicated week they had had. Not only had Omar's message been brief, but he had not answered his questions.

_< <Do u have plans for tonight?_

_< <Nope, why?_

_< <Good. See you at 9 pm at 80 Grove St, West Village>>_

_< Why not in your place? _

_< <Get dress sexy...>> _

_< <Why? What's in that place?_

_< <Omar?_

_< <Omar, why the fuck don't you answer me?_

He snorted and put his cell phone back in his pocket. He looked up and caught the exact moment when two girls were looking at him and whispering amusingly to each other, so he buttoned up his coat and covered the black belly shirt he was wearing, cursing the moment when he had listened to Omar by dressing "sexy."

He closed his eyes for a moment remembering the events of that week. 

_As soon as Omar had arrived, Ander had approached him to kiss him, but he noticed something was wrong. When he heard Omar say in that low tone, he knew so well, "we have to talk," the first thing that came to his mind was that Omar would leave him. Within seconds, he'd made a whole movie about Omar telling him that Keith was the guy he wanted to be with._

_So, when he knew that what was wrong with him was the indiscretion his mother had committed and not that he was sorry to be with him, he was able to breathe again. Even so, he was annoyed that he didn't see it coming because even though his mother was not to blame, he would have liked Omar to hear from him about his decision to return to Spain._

_Needless to say, as a result of that talk, Omar had been quiet and taciturn all week. Although Ander had stayed with Omar that night, nothing had happened between them for obvious reasons. That promise of what he would do to him once he returned from Madrid had magically disappeared. And if he was honest, he hadn't felt like fucking either._

_He had always considered himself a confident guy, and even though he kept saying that he shouldn't be affected by what happened between Omar and Keith and that he should believe what Omar had told him, something inside him kept holding him back._

_Even as the days went by, things between them remained pretty much the same. Every time Ander tried to talk about moving to Madrid, Omar would change the subject. One of those days when Ander had the afternoon off, he had taken the keys that Omar had left for him and set off for his apartment. When he arrived, he noticed Omar's surprised face when he saw him there, but he hadn't made any further comment._

_"Hey... You're not happy to see me or what?" -Ander had come up to him and put his arms around Omar's neck._

_"It's not that, tío... It's just that I was surprised that you came. I thought you had practice today." -Omar had responded, giving him a brief kiss as he walked away from him._

_"Yes, the coach canceled the practice, and I thought we could spend the afternoon together._

_"Ya... Que guay..." -Omar had answered him, barely smiling. "Well, what do you want to do?_

_"I don't know whatever you want for me is fine..._

_"Vale, we can watch something on Netflix...."_

_Ander had nodded as he dropped onto the couch. Omar sat down next to him, and Ander circled his back to hug him. Omar had leaned his head against his chest and occasionally stroked his arm with his fingertips, giving him goosebumps. Halfway through the movie, he noticed that Omar wasn't paying attention, so he turned to him and kissed him on the temple, he had asked:_

_"What are you thinking about?"_

_"Do you really want to know?"_

_"Tell me..."_

_"I was thinking about what you told me the day I came back. That we should focus on the present because many things could happen during this year... What did you mean, Ander?_

_"Well, nothing special. I was trying to smooth over the moment..."_

_"It was that, or do you think we might break up again? And for that reason, it's not worth talking about?"_

_"Come on... What are you saying, Omar? Of course, I don't think that. In fact, I thought that if you don't want to move from here, I could stay..."_

_Omar had taken off from him to look him in the eye._

_"What?"_

_Ander had shrugged off the issue._

_"What? I want to be with you, and if you don't want to move now, I could stay here..._

_"For how long? One more year? No, no... I can't accept that you stay just for me when what you want is to return to Madrid..."_

_"Okay, Omar. Forget what I said... I don't want to start an argument over something that hasn't happened yet... I'm sure we'll find a way..."_

The voice coming out of the loudspeaker, indicating that they were arriving at Christopher Street Station, brought him back to the present. He took a deep breath and got off the train. As he stepped out onto the street, he looked at the GPS and started to walk across West 4th. Street until he reached Grove Street. Five minutes later, he stopped in front of the bar entrance. He looked around and saw several guys dressed much more extravagantly than he had considered their clothes, so, shrugging, he walked straight into the place.

Even though the place was practically packed, he didn't take long to find Omar. He only had to look around to know where he would find him. Leaning against the bar, Omar was drinking a beer. He looked fucking sexy, dressed only in dark jeans and a black tank top. Ander felt his body react to that sight, and without hesitation, he approached him.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-Hey..._ -Ander greeted him, raising his voice to make himself heard. _-What are we doing here?_ -When he touched Omar, he felt his skin warm and slightly slippery from sweat against his fingers, making the arousal he was feeling more acute.

When Omar turned around, the first thing he did was to look at Ander's hand, which was resting on his shoulder at that moment. Although the light was low, Ander could feel the strange look Omar gave him; and then what he said left him speechless.

_-Do I know you?_

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m genuinely intrigued by what you think about this chapter. I’d like to read your thoughts! 💙🖤


	46. Seduction Games

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> Chapter 46 is ready. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did in writing it.
> 
> After so much drama and angst, it seems to me that a chapter like this was just what we needed.
> 
> As Soda Stereo song says: "Juegos de seducción." Enjoy!
> 
> xoxo 💙🖤

*******

Even though the place was practically packed, he didn't take long to find Omar. He only had to look around to know where he would find him. Leaning against the bar, Omar was drinking a beer. He looked fucking sexy, dressed only in dark jeans and a black tank top. Ander felt his body react to that sight, and without hesitation, he approached him.

_-Hey..._ -Ander greeted him, raising his voice to make himself heard. _-What are we doing here?_ -When he touched Omar, he felt his skin warm and slightly slippery from sweat against his fingers, making the arousal he was feeling more acute.

When Omar turned around, the first thing he did was to look at Ander's hand, which was resting on his shoulder at that moment. Although the light was low, Ander could feel the strange look Omar gave him; and then what he said left him speechless.

_-Do I know you?_

*******

**Chapter 46. Seduction Games**

**_(Ander)_ **

Ander raised his hands to his face for a few seconds before answering.

_-Jodeeer, Omar... Qué coño haces?_

Omar wet his bottom lip with the tip of his tongue, intending to provoke him, and he had succeeded.

_-I think you're mistaken, tío. My name is Roman._

_-Stop fucking around with me..._

Omar curled his lips in a naughty smile, and getting close enough to touch his earlobe, he whispered to him:

_-And you are...?_

Ander looked at him for a moment, weighing his options. Those last few days had been like walking a tightrope; one false step, and everything could go to shit for good.

It was clear to him that this would not fix the problems between them, so he could stop him in his tracks and tell him that they were not up for these games, or he could forget all their problems and agree to what Omar intended. He knew that this was Omar's way of telling him that he was trying too, so he knew what he would do next without hesitation.

_-Andrés, my name is Andrés..._ -He finally replied, biting his lips to hide a smile.

The look of approval Omar gave him was all Ander needed to know he had done the right thing. It seemed that night would be worth it, after all. If Omar wanted to play, Ander would be sure to give him what he wanted.

_-So... Are you alone?_ -He asked, holding both hands on either side of Omar's body, cornering him against the bar.

- _Apparently, my boyfriend has dumped me..._ -Omar muttered, shrugging.

_-Well, your boyfriend is an asshole, so... What do you say if you and I have some fun?_ -Ander whispered a few inches from his mouth.

_-Vale..._

_-Well, then what... Buy me a drink?_

A few minutes later, Ander was drinking a vodka tonic while swaying slightly to the music. Omar was standing next to him facing the dance floor when he heard him ask:

_-Let's dance?_

Ander turned and looked at his lips.

_-Or we could kiss..._ -He mumbled until the space between them was closed. He had barely touched his bottom lip when Omar threw his head back.

_-You're going a little fast, don't you think, tío?_

Letting out a snort of incredulity, Ander lowered his hand to Omar's crotch and began to caress him over the jeans, feeling how Omar reacted to his caress.

_-Do you think so?_ -He fought back, taunting him.

_-Joder..._ -Omar muttered, and taking him by the hand, dragged him to the dance floor.

Ander felt euphoric. He did not know for sure the exact reason; he simply wished to extend this feeling as much as possible. The music playing loudly, the lights, the people dancing around him, and Omar rubbing up against him, was unbearable. Omar was playing that game, and he found so fucking morbid that he didn't want it to end.

For a fraction of a second, he stopped dancing to look him in the face. He couldn't hold it in any longer; he needed him more than he needed to breathe because he had the feeling that he wouldn't survive another minute if he didn't touch him. If he couldn't taste him. So, he took both hands to Omar's neck without further ado and began to kiss him, forcing his tongue to separate Omar's lips.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Omar tasted of alcohol, mint, and tobacco. They kissed until their lips swelled. Until he couldn't take it anymore. Ander moved against him at a rhythm that was not that of music but his own desire. He sank his hands into Omar's dense hair, pressing him against himself, letting that need that had been accumulating throughout those months flow uninhibitedly.

_-Let's get out of here..._ -Ander pressed against Omar's lips. _-Let's go to your place... I want you now._

It was not necessary to tell him anything else. Before Ander could realize it, Omar was dragging him off the dance floor, but instead of heading for the exit, Omar took him to the bathrooms. He just let him go until they were inside one of them, and he had locked the door. Omar pushed him against the wall and, grunting, kissed him. Both the gesture and the kiss were wild, demanding. Everything was perfect. Ander arched over Omar, pressing his hips against his so that he could feel how hard he was, trying to find some relief from the need to feel him. It all boiled down to that one moment.

_-Omar..._ -He pleaded with his eyes closed. -Let's go now.

Omar laughed and leaned his forehead against Ander's, breathing heavily.

_-Again?_ -He said, - _I'm not Omar, tío._

Omar pushed his body slightly against him so he could feel how hard he was, and within seconds, Omar opened his fly to slip his hand and release his cock. As he devoured his mouth, he moved his wrist with precise movements, making him moan with pleasure. Ander felt that he would lose control at any moment; his legs trembled, threatening to stop holding him. When he thought he would not last another second, Omar stopped and stroked Ander's cheek with his fingertips.

_-You get really naughty when you're horny, don't you?_

_-Jodeeer..._ -Ander hissed against Omar's neck.

Ander felt his temples throbbing with desire; being in a two-by-two space, just him and Omar, snogging and touching each other like two teenagers, was more than he could bear. Suddenly, the gleam of humor in Omar's eyes disappeared to make way for something dark, making Ander gulp. Omar gave him a strange smile before sliding his fingers down the waistband of his pants and pulling them down to free his cock completely. 

Ander saw him get down on his knees without saying another word and place himself between his thighs. Omar took him between his lips with unbridled lust and began to suck on him, using his tongue, teeth, and lips, until he covered him almost completely. Ander put a hand on Omar's head and, entangling his fingers between his hair, urged him to go deeper. When Omar grunted and slid his cock almost down his throat, Ander had to muster all his strength not to cum right there.

_-Please, Omar..._ -He involuntarily spread his legs a little further, as far as his pants would allow, but at that moment, Omar stopped.

Ander saw him stand up and look into his eyes. Ander could see how much fun he was having, so, closing the space between them, he bit Omar's lower lip, making him moan. As soon as he released him from the kiss, Omar put both hands on his chest and whispered very close to his ear:

_-Vale, I see you're horny. I'll see you later... Andrés_. -And without giving him time to react, Omar opened the door and left him there. Hard and frustrated.

_-Hey! Where are you going?_ -Ander called him. But it was too late since Omar had left.

Five minutes later, Ander came out of the bathrooms and started looking for him. He looked towards the dance floor where they had been moments before, but he couldn't find him, so he headed for the bar. Omar was not there either. He ran his tongue over his lips and felt them still swollen. He pulled out his cell phone and called him as he headed for the exit. After a couple of tone-rings, he heard Omar's voice.

_-Ander?_

_-Where are you_? -He asked, trying to sound calm, though he was far from calm.

_-I'm on my way to my apartment. Where are you?_ -Omar asked in an innocent voice.

_-Omar, don't fuck with me! I'm out here... looking for you._

_-What are you talking about, Ander? Outside where?_

Ander snorted when he heard him. He couldn't believe how far Omar was taking that game.

_-You're an asshole... Did you leave me here? Really?_

Ander heard Omar's laughter from the other side of the line, and almost immediately, Omar asked him:

_-Do you wanna come over to my place, nene?_

_-You're an asshole, you know that? But you'll see... I'm on my way._

*******

**_(Omar)_ **

During the whole time they were in the bar, Omar did nothing but provoke Ander. It was a need so primitive and elemental that he could not contain himself. He had to admit that the game had gotten a little out of hand since locking him up in a bathroom stall was not in his original plan. So, when he realized what he had done, he decided to turn back.

Leaving his boyfriend there and running to his apartment had been a desperate action, but he didn't want their first time after so many months to be like that, in a bar bathroom. He knew that Ander would soon be looking for him, and he didn't want to be around when that happened. So, as soon as he left the bathrooms, he walked fast to the exit. 

He was entering the subway station when his cell phone started vibrating. Once Ander hung up on him - _not before assuring him that what he had done would have consequences_ \- he knew he had to hurry to get to the apartment before him. 

All the way back, he kept reminiscing about what happened in that bar and imagining what would happen once they met again. As soon as the elevator doors opened, he ran to the door and, with trembling fingers, inserted the key into the lock. He undressed on the way to his room, opened the bathroom door, and took a shower. He did so in record time, and when he came out, he dried off the excess water and, naked, dropped himself on the bed.

A few minutes later, he heard the front door open, followed by Ander's unmistakable steps. 

_-Omar? Where are you?_

_-In here..._ -He managed to answer. His heart was beating so hard, while he felt hundreds of butterflies fluttering in his stomach because of the anticipation.

A few seconds later, Ander appeared in the doorway. His nose was red, and his cheeks pinkish. Omar didn't know if it was because he was cold or because he was so angry. When their eyes met, Ander's words died on his lips as he saw what Omar was doing.

Omar was lying buck naked on his back and slowly teasing his cock. He licked his bottom lip and grinned when he saw Ander gulp before asking with a hoarse voice. 

- _What are you doing?_

_-What do you think am I doing?_ -Omar challenged him, fixing his gaze on Ander's body.

_-You're a dickhead..._

Omar looked at him, biting his nails in a reflex action. _-It was part of the game..._

_-Well, now you're going to find out..._ -Omar could see the desire, but also a playful smile on Ander's face, which reassured him.

Ander dropped the keychain on the dresser and began to undress in a hurry. By the time he got down his jeans, his boxers were showed a big tenting in the front. Ander was so fucking hard that it made him exhaled a slight whisper.

_-It was fun, wasn't it?_ -Omar mumbled.

Ander shook his head as if he still couldn't believe what Omar had done, and straddling him, he whispered:

_-I can only assure you that this will be a very long night._

They both smiled at that promise.

_-Te quiero, capullo. And I want us to make it work because I don't want to be separated from you again._ -Omar whispered against his lips.

_-I love you too, and I know we'll work it out... But I don't want to talk about it now._

**_(Ander)_ **

Ander let out a warm sigh and dropped onto Omar's body. When their cocks met, he could only utter a moan of pleasure. He felt like he was in heaven and was pretty sure that he and Omar would find a way to be together. At that moment, when Omar caught his lips between his and deepened the kiss, he gave up. If Omar wanted to stay in New York, he'd stay with him because there was no way he could live without him.

Ander cupped Omar's face in his hands and responded to the kiss with hunger. _-I love you. You have no idea how much._ -Ander said between kisses.

As he watched Omar melt under his touch, Keith's ghost reappeared in his mind, making him whisper:

_-I want to watch your face when I make you cum... I need to be sure that you don't think of anybody other than me._ -On a reedy moan, Ander dove deeper into Omar's mouth, making him groan.

_-Please, Ander... I really want you so badly._ -Omar rasped. _-But it is more important that you know that it has always been you. I can never give myself to anybody else than you. I never could and never will._

That was all that he needed to hear for the last barrier came down. He loved Omar so badly that he didn't give a shit whatever would have happened between him and Keith. He was so fucking sure about Omar's love that nothing else mattered.

Omar was so responsive, so fucking handsome, that he couldn't think of anything but sink on him. He wanted to believe with all his might that he belonged to him... That they both belonged to each other.

Ander rolled him into his side so that they were facing each other and then slipped a hand between their bodies and palmed Omar's cock, giving him one firm jolt. 

_-I want you._ -Ander mumbled.

_-You've got me. And I have no intention of ever changing that, nene._ -Omar answered, looking into his eyes.

Ander couldn't help but smile at him, and as he did so, he lifted Omar's leg slightly to gain better access to him. He cupped Omar's balls, and because it was so open to him, he began to play with one of his fingers against Omar's butt, making him tingle.

- _Do you like that?_ -Ander asked.

As an answer, Omar gave him a deep kiss.

_-Hold on..._ -Ander said, letting go.

_-What?_ -Omar groaned at the loss of contact.

_-Where's the lube?_

_-Over there, inside the drawer..._ -Omar could barely answer.

Ander took it and dripped some of it onto his fingers. _-I'm gonna make you cum hard all over me._

Omar groaned in response, and Ander smiled, thinking that he could turn Omar on with just one sentence. Then, he put his lubed fingers between Omar's legs and slid just one finger inside him.

_-Joder, Ander... don't stop, please._ -Omar shivered against him.

_-Now it's my turn to play..._ -Ander whispered, making Omar shudder.

Ander pressed the tip of his finger inside him, and immediately, Omar's breathing hitched. Omar was so fucking tight, even tighter than he could remember...

- _Should I stop?_ -Ander asked with a malicious grin.

_-Don't you dare..._ -Omar shook his head, plunging his face into the hollow of Ander's shoulder.

_-Do you want more, huh? I see how pleasing it is to be in control..._ -He mused in a hoarse voice.

Omar nodded against his neck, unable to utter a single word. Slowly, Ander pushed his finger into Omar's body, while with the other hand, he slowly stroked his boyfriend's cock. He could feel Omar's chest rise and fall with a deep breath, and then Omar seemed to squeeze Ander's finger. Ander moved his finger a little more, reaching for the spot he wanted to find, and when his finger brushed that sweet spot, Omar shuddered in his arms. It seemed as if it was the first time they do so, and Ander could only feel that this moment was magical.

_-Do you like it?_

Omar moaned so loudly that it made Ander wanted to kiss him. So, he stroked him again, loving Omar's reaction; his breathing became shallow and quick. Ander kissed his temple, his jaw, his lips, everything he could reach. Pleasuring Omar was his favorite thing to do in the world. Because when Omar was between his arms, there was nothing more important than that.

Then, he tucked a second finger in with the first one, and he could notice how Omar winced in pain.

_-Are you okay?_ -Ander couldn't help but ask.

_-I've never been better._.. -Omar sighed and squirmed against him.

Ander's cock was throbbing, and he could only think that he might cum from just listening to the impatient noises Omar made.

- _Hey... Do you have a condom?_ -Ander had to ask.

_-In the same place where the lube was, but... Ander... we don't need to use it unless you want to._

Ander knew what Omar's words meant, and that was enough to feel his balls tighten.

_-I don't want to... It would be fucking awesome to feel your skin against mine without any barrier between us. I want you so badly..._

Omar began to trace a series of wet kisses along Ander's chest, urging him not to stop. And almost immediately, Omar's fingers closed around his cock to pump him with his hand.

_-Ander, fuck me now..._

_-Come, sit on me.._. -Ander mumbled as he hauled Omar upright until they both were seated on the bed. Ander closed his legs and leaned his back against the pillows.

Omar looked drunk with lust; his face was flushed, and his eyes became darker as he straddled him. Omar held both hands at the headboard to let Ander took the lube and drizzled a generous amount on his cock. Seconds later, he grabbed Ander's cock and, lining himself up on top of him, began to be sunk on him.

Omar remained motionless for a few seconds, and Ander was aware of two things; the first one was the incredible tightness Omar was exerting on his cock, and the second was the slight discomfort on Omar's face. It was only for a moment, but it was enough that it didn't go unnoticed. The sensation of entering Omar's body was so overwhelming that he had to close his eyes tightly. Making love with Omar was all he needed. And it felt as good as he remembered... or even better.

Ander dropped his head until it hit Omar's chest, and he took a deep breath. He wrapped his arms around Omar's back, trying to control a wave of emotions. Just being there with him was enough to make him feel complete. When he realized that Omar was not moving, he forced himself to open his eyes to find an answer in his gaze. Omar curved his lips in an attempt to smile, but as soon as Ander moved, he inhaled sharply, as if in pain.

_-What's going on? Are you okay?_

_-I'm fine... It's just that I need to get used... It's been a long time..._

Ander said nothing. He didn't need to because he had realized that Omar had been sincere with him. So, he could only say in a whisper:

_-Let me kiss you, come here..._ -He reached up and cupped Omar's face, bringing his mouth to his own.

Ander kissed him tenderly, but with hunger; at first, he brushed Omar's lips very gently, and then, when Omar responded much more intensely, Ander licked Omar's mouth, savoring his taste. At the same time, he rubbed first Omar's arms and then his chest with soft hands, letting his fingers slide down until they brushed his cock.

_-Joder! You have no idea how much I missed you..._ -Omar mumbled against his mouth as Ander continued to caress him gently.

_-Te quiero. Never forget it._ -Ander whispered against his lips.

As if he had said the magic words, Omar began to move slowly. He adjusted the angle of his hips, and that made Ander let out a groan. He missed those feelings a lot; he missed Omar a lot. He missed so much his warmth, the softness of his skin, the sounds he made when they made love. The way their bodies connected as if they were made for each other. Ander's senses were numb because Omar's body was sliding up and down the length of his cock, tipping his hips over and over again.

_-Omar..._ -Ander groaned. That was the only thing he could say because every fiber of his body was beyond his own limits. That was Omar could make him.

As a response, Omar pushed slowly over and over again. Each time Omar moved, Ander felt that he could die from pleasure. Omar's body squeezed his cock in an unthinkable way; he didn't know if it was because it had been so long since they had been together, but he was so tight that it was almost torture.

_-This... This is so..._ -Ander struggled to find the right words as the two of them shared sloppy kisses, their tongues brushing and playing against each other. It had always been amazing to make love to Omar, but this time it felt different... - _This is so fucking hot, Omar._

_-You are... I can feel you so deeply inside of me... you make me feel alive again_. -Omar breathed heavily. And then, he tilted his hips once more to make Ander's cock brushed that sweet spot.

_-Right there..._ -Omar gasped. - _There's nothing like it._

Seeing Omar's gesture, Ander pushed deeper, making Omar moaned louder. He saw that Omar was biting the corner of his lip, picking up the pace. Everything was perfect, and being aware that Omar was riding him to taking pleasure from his body was simply overwhelming.

_-Do that again..._ -Ander groaned.

Omar obeyed by putting more weight on the headboard and groaned as well. By that time, he moved his hips faster, fucking himself against Ander's cock, more urgently, looking for his own pleasure. Ander slipped his hands to grab Omar's ass to urge him not to stop because he was sure he couldn't last much longer.

Then he grabbed Omar's cock and started to jerk him off. Ander tipped his head back, making an effort not to cum yet. Panting, he slid his thumb tip over Omar's cleft.

_-I need you to cum for me because I can't hold it any longer. I'm gonna cum inside you now... let's do it together..._ -He pleaded.

Omar's moans grew louder, and Ander stroked him harder. Omar's face transformed because the pleasure was more than he could bear.

_-I'm gonna cum..._ -Ander grunted, reaching orgasm.

His whole body trembled, enjoying the pleasant sensations Omar gave him, feeling the strength abandoned his body. Just a few seconds later, he heard Omar moaning and could feel Omar's warm semen squirting onto his abdomen and part of his chest.

For the next minute, neither of them said anything. Both were exhausted, trying to get back into the rhythm of their breathing. Omar leaned his head against his chest, and Ander hugged him tightly. Both were sweating, and he was unsure if the powerful heartbeat he heard was his or Omar's. They were slowly descending from the sky, enjoying that wonderful numbness after a spectacular fuck.

If Ander could have, he would have lengthened that moment forever; still inside Omar, he could feel his cock slowly losing its hardness until it finally slipped off with a slight movement Omar made.

_-Do you want us to shower together?_ -Omar asked in a whisper.

_-Five more minutes, please. Could you hug me in the meantime?_ -Ander hummed against his temple.

Omar simply grinned, doing what Ander had asked him to do, snuggling against his chest.

Neither of them cared that they were sticky from sweat and semen. They had reconnected in the most incredible way, making that feeling of complicity they were sharing give them the certainty that there was no barrier they could not overcome together.

*******


	47. An unforgettable night

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!  
> Chapter 47 is ready! Enjoy it!
> 
> As always, thanks for reading, leaving a comment, and/or leaving a Kudo. It means a lot to me!
> 
> xoxo 💙🖤

*******

For the next minute, neither of them said anything. Both were exhausted, trying to get back into the rhythm of their breathing. Omar leaned his head against his chest, and Ander hugged him tightly. Both were sweating, and he was unsure if the powerful heartbeat he heard was his or Omar's. They were slowly descending from the sky, enjoying that wonderful numbness after a spectacular fuck.

If Ander could have, he would have lengthened that moment forever; still inside Omar, he could feel his cock slowly losing its hardness until it finally slipped off with a slight movement Omar made.

_-Do you want us to shower together?_ -Omar asked in a whisper.

_-Five more minutes, please. Could you hug me in the meantime?_ -Ander hummed against his temple.

Omar simply grinned, doing what Ander had asked him to do, snuggling against his chest.

Neither of them cared that they were sticky from sweat and semen. They had reconnected in the most incredible way, making that feeling of complicity they were sharing, give them the certainty that there was no barrier they could not overcome together.

*******

**Chapter 47. An unforgettable night**

**_(Omar)_ **

He woke up feeling Ander's warm fingers running down his back. Slowly, he opened his eyes and blinked a couple of times, reluctant to leave his arms. He had fallen asleep against his chest after making love, and it was so pleasant that he had no intention of moving.

_-Hey, sleepyhead..._ -Ander muttered while caressing him.

_-Mmh..._ -Omar hummed in a raspy voice because of the sleep.

_-I'd love to stay lying in this position, but believe it or not, you weigh a lot, and my legs are already numb._ -He joked.

Omar wrapped his arms around Ander's neck leaned in just enough to look at him. Ander looked stunning; his eyes glowed as he dedicated a knowing smile to him. Omar let out a sigh, and Ander took advantage of the moment to kiss him gently. As soon as Ander's tongue began to work its way between his lips, Omar felt that air was trapped in his lungs, and the need to extend the kiss became urgent. Ander seemed to read his mind because he pressed himself more against him.

The memory of what happened in the bar made him giggle, causing Ander to look at him with an eyebrow raised.

_-What's going on? Why are you laughing?_

- _I remembered the look on your face when I left you in that bathroom._

- _You asshole..._ -Ander hissed, but he didn't stop smiling.

- _We could do that more often..._ -Omar suggested, rubbing his chin against Ander's cheek.

_-Hmm..._ -Ander grunted as the only answer. - _Do you want to take a shower?_ -he asked with a playful smile.

_-Vale..._ -He whispered, stepping aside to release him.

Ander kissed him on the temple before he stood up. Omar looked up at his ass, and a pang of desire ran through his body. When he heard flowing water, he jumped to his feet. Ander was in the shower, leaning both hands against the wet tiles so the water pressure would massage his body. The toned back, the perfect butt, and those legs that had been exercised by so many hours of training made Omar bite his lower lip as he felt his cock coming alive again. Ander was so fucking perfect that he would never get tired of looking at him. 

_-Hey... Come on in_. - Ander reached out a hand when he saw him.

Omar obeyed without objection. As soon as he entered the shower, Ander cradled him in his arms, letting the hot water caress their bodies. For a few seconds, they stayed like this. Immobile, one in the arms of the other. Ander rested his chin on his shoulder, and Omar wrapped both hands around his waist. When Ander finally released him, it was to take the bath gel and pour a generous amount on his palm. 

He began to rub Omar's chest gently with soapy hands as he looked into his eyes. Ander's thoughtful look as he soaped Omar's body did not go unnoticed by him. Ander had never bathed him before, but he felt so damn good, so intimate, that Omar allowed him to do so.

Omar closed his eyes and his mind transported him to the past. It seemed like another lifetime when Ander's body was devastated by cancer. Ander had lost so much weight and looked so weak that panic had taken hold of him at the thought of losing him. He remembered when he had helped Ander bathe and how difficult it had been for both of them to handle that situation.

_-What do you say we put the tub in instead of taking a shower? You'd be more comfortable..._

_-I don't care. -Ander had responded sullenly._

_-Well, the bathtub, then._

_Five minutes later, Omar had come out with a bathrobe in his hands._

_-It is already filled. Come on; I'll help you take off your clothes and put on your bathrobe. -He had told him with a smile as he bent down to undo Ander's tennis shoes._

_-No, I can do it myself._

_-All right, then. -He had responded without protest. -I'll go downstairs and see if your mother has any bubbles, and I'll be right back._

_When he returned with the bubble bottle, he had seen Ander in his robe trying to stand up. He looked sweaty and paler because of the effort he had put into undressing._

_He had approached him, and without saying anything about his pallor, he had told him:_

_-Come on, let me help you. -He had run a hand around his waist, and before Ander could protest, they had gone to the bathroom._

_-Take off your robe and hold onto my neck so you can sit in the bath. -He had told him in a tone that didn't admit of any discussion._

_Omar had seen him hesitate, but finally, Ander had lowered his head and dropped the bathrobe on the floor._

_It was obvious how much weight he had lost due to the illness, but seeing him with no clothes on, Omar had been alarmed. He had hugged him by closing the space between them so that Ander would not realize how much seeing him had affected him. He didn't want to look him in the eyes because he didn't want him to misunderstand his expression, but the truth was shitting himself as he realized how sick he was; so, once Ander was sitting in the tub, Omar had turned his back on him for a moment to pull himself together._

_-Is the water temperature okay? -Omar had flashed a smile before turning to look at him._

_-I'm disgusting, no? -He had said, hardening his expression, but with his eyes shining from the un-shed tears._

_-What are you saying, Ander? Don't talk nonsense._

_-Go away. I don't want you to see me like this. I don't need your pity, Omar._

_-Pity? What are you talking about?_

_-Go away! Jodeeer!_

_For a moment, he had thought of obeying him and leaving the bathroom, but seeing him so fragile and about to crumble, he had moved towards him with determination._

_-No! I'm not going anywhere! Is that clear? I'm here to help you, and the last feeling you provoke in me is pity... -He had told him as he sat on the edge of the tub._

_He had expected a violent reaction from him and was prepared for it, but to his amazement, he had seen Ander take his arms around his knees and begin to sob. His whole body trembled, convulsing because of the crying, while he tried uselessly to control himself._

_Omar's heart had been broken, and helplessly, tears had begun to roll down his cheeks as he embraced him tightly, not caring about anything but comfort him. He had remained like that, kneeling on the tiles, hugging Ander until little by little, the crying had stopped. Omar had wiped away his tears before whispering to him:_

_-Never again think that I feel sorry for you. Do you get it?_

_Ander had looked at him, whispering:_

_-I'm fucking scared, Omar. I don't want to die._

_-You are not going to die, Ander. That's not going to happen... -He had whispered, trying to convince Ander and himself._

_He had taken a sponge and moistened it with the soapy water, bathing him, rubbing first on his back and then on the rest of his body._

Omar shook his head to put away that dark memory and opened his eyes again only to find Ander's look of tenderness.

_-What are you thinking about?_ -Ander said, shampooing Omar's hair now.

Omar smiled at the sight of him healthy and full of life.

_-I thought that... feeling your hands on my body is practically all I want in life._ -He confessed.

_-Joder...._ -Ander groaned, dropping his hands without hiding his surprise. _-What do I need to do to hear this more often?_

_-Come here, asshole_. -Omar let out a slight sigh that was lost under the shower's spray, and rinsing off the shampoo, pulled Ander's slippery body against his chest.

_-You don't need to do anything. You're perfect..._ -He grumbled against Ander's wet skin.

Seconds later, he reached for the shampoo bottle. Ander closed his eyes when Omar swirled sudsy hands began to soap his soft curls just as Ander had done with him seconds before.

_-Joder... That feels good_... -Ander mused as Omar massaged his head. 

_-Omar.._. -Ander opened his eyes. _-I... I wanted to tell you that... I'm sorry I didn't believe you before._

_-What do you mean?_ -Omar questioned him without understanding what he was talking about.

Ander didn't answer right away; it seemed like he was looking for the right words. _-I realized that I am the only one for you._

_-Ah... that._ -Although Omar had tried to hide it, he knew that Ander was not stupid and that he had realized it. _-So, can we put all that behind us?_ -This whole Keith thing had been a barrier between them, and he didn't want Keith or anybody else to come between them anymore.

Ander nodded. 

_-I just want to tell you that I realize now that even if it didn't, it wouldn't change the way I feel about you. We weren't together after all... and you had the right to be with him and do what..._

Omar looked at him in surprise. He couldn't believe that Ander was serious.

_-Shush. It's always been you, and that's never going to change. I love you, asshole._

Ander smiled at him. _-I love you too, Omar._ -And without saying anything else, he went over to kiss him. 

_-Can we go back to the room?_ -Without waiting for an answer, Ander turned off the tap and opened the door to get a couple of towels. He laid one out for Omar and toweled off with the other.

Omar was the first to enter the room. He looked at the bed, and the sight made him grin. The crumpled sheets were a reminder of the incredible moment they had shared before, and he was so engrossed in those sweet memories, he didn't hear Ander approaching. When he felt his boyfriend’s warm lips brushing against his shoulder and his hands wrapped around him from behind, he leaned against his chest. When he felt Ander’s hand go down his abdomen, he let out a choked moan. The moment Ander caught his cock, his body reacted to the touch, making him shiver.

Omar turned to look at him and put his arms around his neck. Ander looked at him as if he was the most important person in his life, and he couldn't be happier.

_-What?_ -He grunted; his lips a few inches away from Ander's.

_-Nothing... That you look very handsome_. -Ander mused, shrugging as if he were playing down the matter.

Omar rolled his eyes when he heard him, but he couldn't help but smirk.

_-So what? Do you want to fuck again, or do you prefer to sleep?_ -Ander brushed Omar's lips lightly before rubbing the tip of his nose on Omar's cheek.

Omar wanted to do it, but this time he wanted to be the one to fuck him. It had been too long since he had been inside Ander, and although he generally preferred Ander make love to him, that night, he wanted Ander to enjoy as much as he did.

_-I was thinking that... maybe we could switch..._ -Omar gently licked Ander's upper lip and could feel a burst of energy near his crotch. - _What do you say? It's been a long time since I made love to you..._ -He whispered, rubbing himself gently against his cock.

Ander let out a soft moan, and when Omar looked up to see him, he saw that Ander was looking at him in a way that drove him crazy.

_-That would be very, very hot..._ -Ander whispered as his cock continued to grow between his legs.

_-I want you to enjoy it just like I did before. I want it to be perfect_... -Omar confessed.

_-If you touch me like only you know, I'm sure it will be_. -Ander mused against his lips.

A gleam of fun appeared in Ander's eyes as his fingers found their way to Omar's cock. Immediately, Omar felt a wave of fire in his lower abdomen and exhaled hard.

_-It turns me on to see you like this_. -Omar admitted, kissing his neck. - _Come..._

When they got to bed, they dropped each other, kissing and hugging as if life was in it. Omar stood back for a second to see Ander's face, who was keeping his eyes closed. He was so handsome and sexy, dominant and sweet at the same time... He was thankful to have him by his side again, putting aside the thought that this might change if they couldn't come to some agreement about where they would live. He would worry about that later.

He stroked Ander's face with his fingertips, sliding them along the eyebrows and the bridge of his nose and then down to his lips. Ander caught a finger between his teeth and then began to suck it off.

A few seconds later, Omar followed his path along Ander's torso, caressing him with his lips, kissing every inch of his skin. He stopped at one of his nipples by licking it and pinching it slightly with his teeth, bringing him out a kind of moan. He loved to see how Ander surrendered to him; without reservation, abandoned to what he made him feel, oblivious to everything that was not their bodies.

Omar continued his journey through Ander's body until he stopped at his cock. He gave him a couple of wet kisses on the tip, delighting in his taste, but without putting it in his mouth. Ander's cock dripped every time Omar ran his tongue over it; Omar did that over and over again, making Ander impatient to feel him more deeply. He heard him let out a desperate grunt, and seconds later, he felt Ander's hand pushing him slightly to urge him to continue. Omar ran his tongue all the way down to his balls, alternately placing them into his mouth, making him shiver.

_-Jodeeer... I love what you are doing to me..._ -Ander moaned, arching his back, waiting for Omar's next move.

Omar grinned and stopped to rise. Ander grunted and opened his eyes; the frustration reflected on his face.

_-Just wait... I needed this._ -Omar explained, taking a fluffy pillow. - _Come on, lift your hips._ -He asked him as he placed it under his butt.

_-Spread your legs, nene_. -Omar demanded in a muffled voice, enjoying the rubbing of the sheets against his own erection. 

Ander did what Omar asked him to do, while with one hand, he looked for the tube of lube that had been left on the bed. When he found it, he handed it to Omar by biting his lower lip.

- _What?_ -Omar asked with a hint of mockery when he picked it up. - _Don't tell me you don't want me to go on..._

_-Joder... I need you now, Omar..._

_-Be patient..._ -He mused in response.

Omar put the lube aside and spread Ander's legs wider, leaving him exposed. Once he had him the way he wanted it, he started torturing him with his lips and tongue, brushing him over and over on his inner thighs, on his balls; with every caress that he lavished on him, he was getting closer to his goal. When Omar pressed his tongue against his ass, Ander gasped, closing his legs in a reflex action. He had never kissed him like that before, so intimately, but it was something he desired to do more than anything else in the world.

_-Just relax and trust me_. -Omar begged him, spreading his legs again, but this time he used both arms to immobilize him. He wanted to give Ander all the pleasure he was capable of; he wanted to show him with every kiss and every caress how important he was to him. He approached his lips again and started moving his tongue around him with slow movements, provoking him, and then, he forced his tongue against Ander's tense muscles to make his way inside him, sinking his tongue again and again. Ander twisted against the mattress, groaning.

_-Omar..._ -He gasped once more. 

_-Do you like it?_ -He asked in a raspy voice, giving him a little pause.

_-Aha..._ -It was the only thing Ander could whisper as he arched, begging for more.

He had never seen Ander so horny. His cheeks were rosy, and his lips were swollen; his totally hard cock swayed every time he moved his hips in search of that hitherto unknown pleasure. 

Omar leaned up slightly and pressed two fingers against him, forcing them in. Ander groaned in response by raising his hips to give him better access to his body. Once he had sunk them completely into Ander, he began to trace scissors movements to dilate him further, and then he stroked him again with his tongue. Everything that happened was so hot... Ander was so fucking tight, Omar thought he would cum right away. The only thing that could be heard in the room was Ander's hoarse moans begging for more.

When he found that sweet spot that he knew would take him to heaven, Ander pushed his ass in, begging him with that movement to fuck him harder with his fingers.

_-I want your cock inside me now_... -And that request was enough for Omar to feel a squirt of precum coming out of him. He stopped for a few seconds, making an effort to hold himself back, breathing deeply, until he succeeded.

- _Joder, Ander... you almost made me cum._ -Omar groaned. 

He took the lube and spread it on his cock and into Ander. He pulled out his fingers and slid slowly into him with some ease. He didn't move for a few seconds because the pleasure was almost unbearable and because he needed Ander to adapt to him.

_-Are you okay?_ -Omar muttered, stroking his thighs.

Ander nodded between light breaths. 

_-I'm going to move slowly, okay? Otherwise, I don't think I can last much longer..._

He had no words to express what he was feeling. Nothing could compare to making love to Ander. Seeing how he enjoyed being caressed and knowing for sure that what they were doing, Ander only allowed it to him, was one reason he wanted to be the best lover. Omar wanted Ander to enjoy every second. He moved to sink into him, and then, he pulled out his cock thoroughly. He kept doing that over and over again, seeing the pleasure reflected in Ander's pupils.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)  
  


- _Omar... this is fucking awesome..._ -He grunted, visibly aroused.

_-Te quiero nene... if you could see what I'm seeing... You are so fucking gorgeous..._

As he entered faster and deeper, Omar had to bite his lips to keep from screaming. Every time Ander moaned, was torture. He felt that he had never experienced such pleasure. It was not the first time he had made love to Ander, but he was sure he had never experienced such intense pleasure. When he saw Ander jerking off, he knew the two of them were close.

_-Cum for me, Ander..._ -Omar asked with a gasp, and almost immediately, Ander did so.

It was incredible the image he had in front of him. Ander clenched his teeth and gasped as the last spurt of semen shot out at his chest. With a raspy moan, Omar finally surrendered to the pleasure, spilling over inside him.

His head was spinning from the effort as he tried to catch his breath. He came out of him to drop onto Ander's body, breathing heavily. He gave him a slobby kiss, which Ander responded to, and then he held him in his arms.

_-We should do this more often. I had forgotten how good it feels._ -Ander whispered, stroking his back with his fingertips.

Omar rolled on his stomach and relaxed by Ander's side. Both were lying on their sides, looking at each other. Ander had some curls stuck to his forehead due to sweat, so Omar reached in and pulled them out, smiling in the process. 

_-Te quiero... You can't imagine how much_. -Omar muttered, closing his eyes. 

Omar began to think about the future, and without being able to avoid it, the fear reappeared. His love for Ander was so great that he didn't know what he would do if they broke up again. Omar was clear that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Ander, but he was not sure that his boyfriend felt the same way.

_"What would happen if he went to live in Madrid and after a while, things didn't work out between them? Was he willing to leave behind the life he had built up over the past few years without being sure that this relationship would work out in the long run?"_

_-What do you think? I know you're not asleep..._ -Ander whispered.

He opened his eyes and forced himself to smile. - _Things..._ -He mumbled in a shallow voice.

_-What kind of things?_

Omar looked at him for a few seconds, struggling with what he really wanted to ask him.

_-Tell me something, how do you see yourself in five years?_ -He spat, holding his breath.

_-Whoa! What kind of question is that?_ -Ander asked, clearly surprised, as he settled down better against the pillow.

_-I don't know... I'm curious._

Ander was silent for a moment. He seemed to be meditating on his answer. 

_-I see myself working on my own. Maybe by then, I'll have my own architecture firm..._

_-Ya..._ -Omar replied in a shallow voice, trying not to feel disappointed since that was not the answer he expected to hear.

- _And you?_ -Ander asked, interested.

_-Me? I don't know, maybe producing my first film..._

- _I'm sure it will be like that, Omar._ -He smiled, dropping one hand over his.

They remained silent until finally, Omar took courage and asked without looking at him:

_-Ander... Would you like to move in with me?_

Omar looked up, fearful of his answer, but Ander was sound asleep. Minutes before, Ander had put one arm around his waist, and now he was breathing steadily. Omar smiled with a hint of concern as he watched him sleep. 

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry if it was too cheesy, but I needed to write something like this after all the suffering they have been through. 😅😈
> 
> xoxo 💙🖤


	48. Be my Valentine...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi,
> 
> Chapter 48 is ready. We're almost reaching the end, so I hope you like it.
> 
> As always, thanks for being here... reading, commenting, and leaving a Kudo. It means a lot to me!
> 
> xoxo

*******

They remained silent until finally, Omar took courage and asked without looking at him:

_-Ander... Would you like to move in with me?_

Omar looked up, fearful of his answer, but Ander was sound asleep. Minutes before, Ander had put one arm around his waist, and now he was breathing steadily. Omar smiled with a hint of concern as he watched him sleep. 

*******

**Chapter 48. Be My Valentine…**

**_(Ander)_ **

_-Hey!_ -Ander moved his hand up and down to attract Omar's attention, who was sitting on Tom's bed, staring blankly.

_-I'm sorry, what?_ -Omar responded by looking at him in confusion.

From his expression, it was evident that he hadn't heard anything he'd said to him in the last five minutes. Omar seemed... thoughtful, as if something was bothering him. Physically, he was with him, but his mind was far away.

_From @piper_ayuso Ig account_

Omar had accompanied him to campus to pick up some clothes since it was Friday, and they had agreed to spend the weekend at his apartment.

_-I was asking if I should take anything other than sneakers and sweatpants. Just in case you felt like going out somewhere._

_-I'm sorry. Yeah, sure, that's fine_. -He answered quietly, biting his nails.

The last few days had been wonderful. Since Omar had started that game in that bar, the relationship between the two had become stronger than ever. Gone were the insecurities, the jealousy, or the fear that what they were building could fall apart with just one word. Ander felt that things couldn't get any better. He had Omar, who was the most important thing; he was the best in his class and, as if that wasn't enough, he had won the last singles tournament he had just played.

They had established a kind of pleasant routine very soon, at least that's how he considered it. The nights he spent in the university dorms were becoming fewer because he preferred to stay with Omar, even if he had to get up an hour earlier to take the subway ride to campus. In the mornings, they both got up early, and while he took a shower, Omar took care of making the coffee. They would have breakfast together, and then he would head off to college while Omar stayed home to check out new job offers from NYU's job board for its recent graduates. 

When classes were over, if he had training, he would sleep on campus, but he would run back to Omar's apartment when he didn't. Usually, when he arrived, Omar would already be there; between the two of them, they would prepare some dinner, or if they were too tired, they would ask for take-out and lie on the couch and talk about their day until they were tired enough to go to bed. And the sex... Pfff... the sex between them was getting better if that was possible. Sometimes passionate, sometimes slow and tender, but always connecting in such a deep way that sometimes he was afraid. Afraid of the intensity of his love for him.

They had not discussed the possibility of staying in New York or moving to Madrid again, but that issue was settled for him. If Omar did not want to move, he had no issue staying in the city, although from the short talk they had had, he knew that Omar disagreed with that decision.

It was true that he had declined an outstanding job offer, but with the grades he had, he was sure he could get something just as good. And yes, if he was honest, he missed Madrid and everything it stood for. He missed his parents, friends, and life there, but he was willing to sacrifice it to be with Omar. So, he had planned to tell him that weekend and had prepared something special to do so. It was silly, but he hoped Omar would like it. It had always been Omar who was the sweetest and most loving of the two, so at least for once, he wanted the roles to be reversed.

He finished packing the rest of his clothes in the small cotton suitcase, and shouldering it, he walked to the door. 

_-Come on, let's go._ -He mumbled, trying not to worry too much about seeing Omar so quiet.

Omar nodded and stood up. As soon as Ander opened the door, he bumped into Tom, who was now entering the room carrying a large basket of clothes.

_-Whoa! Watch out, man..._ -said Ander, holding his friend when he stumbled.

He took the basket out of his hands, and once he left it on the bed, they warmly greeted each other. Tom smiled when he realized that Omar was with him.

_-Omar! It's great to see you here!_ -He greeted him by bumping his fist into Omar's.

- _Hey, Tom... How you doing?_ -Omar greeted him, smiling openly. 

_-Mmh... Surviving._ -He responded by dropping onto the bed. 

_-How's that?_ -Omar chuckled when he saw Tom's cheeky face.

_-The classes are killing me... And the few free hours I have left, I have to use them to do my laundry..._ -He complained, nodding at the big basket of clothes Ander had put aside. _-Pathetic, isn't it?_

_-Stop complaining. That wouldn't happen to you if you didn't let a whole month's worth of clothes pile up..._ -Ander intervened, making fun.

_-Of course, look who's talking. Surely Omar helps you... You should be thankful for the incredible boyfriend you have... instead, me with Jenny... Sometimes she can be a bitch..._

_-Shut up... I don't know what you would do without her. Besides, she has her merit for the simple fact of putting up with you_. -Ander spat, unable to hide a smile.

Tom showed him the middle finger and turning to Omar; he blurted out:

_-So, you're the reason Ander's so happy lately, aren't you?_

Omar smiled, and looking at Ander, he replied:

_-I don't know... Ask him._

Ander smiled back before addressing Tom. _-What are you saying, you dick? I'm always happy... You couldn't have had a better roomie than me..._

_-If you say so..._ -Tom sighed.

He hadn't finished the sentence when Ander threw him a small rubber ball that they sometimes used to play with when boredom consumed them, causing Tom to whine.

_-You're a dickhead!_ -he moaned as he rubbed himself where the ball had landed. - _Seriously, Omar... -How can you stand him? Hey, couldn't you take him to live with you for good?_

_-If he wants to..._ -Omar replied, glancing sideways at Ander.

_-You know, if I left, you'd miss me because you can't live without me... so don't get your hopes up, Tom._ -Ander replied, picking up his suitcase again.

_-Well, I had to try._ -Tom shrugged as he listened.

Omar approached Tom to say goodbye, and Tom winked at him:

_-I guess you both will be spending this weekend at your place, though, right? To celebrate Valentine's Day..._ -He waved his hands as if he were pretending to have sex.

Ander rolled his eyes. _-If you're asking to know if Jenny can stay here... The answer is yes. I'm staying with Omar this weekend, and what he and I do is none of your business. Goodbye, asshole! -_ He winked goodbye. 

They were both leaving the room when they heard him scream:

_-I know you love me, Ander!_

*******

Omar barely spoke the entire way back; he was serious and self-absorbed, and no matter how hard Ander tried, he had barely managed to tear him out a few monosyllables. When he realized that it would be useless to continue insisting, he closed his eyes, put his head on his shoulder, and fell asleep.

_-Hey... Ander, we have arrived_. -Omar moved him slightly, taking the suitcase that was on the side, before standing up.

He blinked a couple of times until he could focus on Omar's face, who smiled at him fleetingly. Ander nodded and followed him out of the carriage.

By the time they got to Omar's place, Ander was on the verge of hysteria, making a thousand guesses as to why he was doing this, but he decided he would wait for Omar to tell him what was wrong.

_-What do you feel like doing?_ -Ander approached Omar from behind and wrapped his arms around his waist while resting his chin on his shoulder.

Omar caressed his hands, remaining silent for a few seconds until after what seemed like an eternity to Ander, he muttered:

_-I don't know... whatever you want, I guess._

Ander took a deep breath. _"Patience,"_ he reminded himself. 

_-We could go to that bar where we were last time and celebrate Valentine's Day, what do you say, Roman?_

Omar turned around to face him. He had overlooked the joke, and instead, his face was perplexed.

_-Valentine's Day? Why do you want to celebrate Valentine's Day? You hate all those cheesy stuff..._

Ander cringed before answering.

_-Well, maybe now I like all that cheesy stuff._

_-Right..._ -Omar mumbled, although it was obvious his answer did not convince him _. -I don't know, tío... I don't feel like partying tonight. Maybe tomorrow night._

Omar gave him a brief kiss on the lips before releasing him from his embrace. Ander glanced at him all the way to the kitchen as he racked his brains, trying to guess what was happening to him. Omar opened the fridge to get a bottle of sparkling water.

He snorted and walked over to Omar. He grabbed him by the wrist and gave him a gentle tug to force him to look at him.

_-Can you tell me what the fuck is wrong with you? And don't tell me shit because you've been acting weird._

Omar lowered his head for a moment before looking at him again, and Ander could see the concern in his eyes.

_-Let's go for a walk_... -It was his only answer.

When they left the building, it was already dark, and the cold winter air was sneaking through his jacket. They walked silently down the cobblestone street, and without Omar telling him, Ander knew where they were going. Ten minutes later, they arrived at the Brooklyn Bridge. Ander had thought of bringing him to this very spot to tell him what he had decided, but from Omar's expression, he was no longer so sure that it was a good idea.

_-Can you tell me what's wrong with you? You're making me nervous. I did something wrong, and you're angry, is that it?_

_-You haven't done anything wrong, Ander. And I'm not angry._ -Omar reassured him.

_-So, what the hell is going on? You got a face as somebody died..._

_-This afternoon, I received a proposal to work at Netflix_. -He murmured.

_-What? -_ He whispered, assimilating Omar's words. It was fabulous news, so he didn't understand why Omar was saying it as if it were a tragedy. _-That's cool! That's amazing, Omar!_ -He walked up to him and grabbed him by the chin, forcing him to look at him.

_-Yes... It is. I didn't think they were going to call me. It's not an important position... it's like a production assistant, but..._

_-What are you saying? That's the least of it._ -Ander mumbled. _-The important thing is that they chose you, and it's a great opportunity. I'm happy for you... but I don't get it. Why you look worried, Omar?_

Omar smiled sadly before looking away.

_-Ander, the truth is... I'm scared shitless._

_-Why? You're very good at what you do, and you shouldn't feel that way..._

_-No, it's not that, tío. I'm afraid for us. I don't want to lose you and..._

_-What do you say, Omar? You're not going to lose me. I know we haven't talked about it again, but I want to tell you that I've made a decision. I'm going to stay here with you._

Omar looked at him, opening his eyes wide as he shook his head.

_-No. I can't allow that, Ander. I know you want to go back to Madrid, and it would be very selfish if I force you to stay here for me._

- _Omar..._ -Ander raised his voice. - _Listen. You are not forcing me to do anything. I am the one who has decided, and if I do so, it's because I prefer a thousand times to be here with you, rather than be there without you._

_-Ander... I'm not going to accept that job offer._

_-What are you saying?_

_-Well, I've thought about it a lot and... you've already done enough. Coming here to finish college, take up tennis again, the scholarship... I think that... it's my turn to do something for you. And I think that once you finish your degree, we could return to Madrid._

_-Are you serious? But you said that you don't want to go back..._ -Ander felt very confused and didn't know what to think.

_-I know what I said, but being with you weighs more than anything else... Besides, Madrid is cool..._ -He concluded with a smile.

Ander hugged him tightly. He knew what it meant for Omar to make that decision, and the fact that he put him before all else, made him feel fully confident that things would work out between them this time. 

At that moment, he remembered what he had put in his pants pocket, so, smiling, he reached in until his fingers caressed the small silver object. 

_-Hey...Close your eyes_. -He asked Omar while biting his lip.

_-Why?_ -Omar frowned, clearly confused.

_-Just do it._ -He ordered him, trying to look serious.

When Omar finally obeyed, Ander pulled the silver necklace with the small padlock out of his pocket. Carefully he reached over and clasped it around Omar's neck. When the necklace was securely fastened, Ander rested his hand on Omar's chest above the pendant.

_-Open your eyes_. -He muttered.

Omar did so and immediately lower his head to look at Ander's hand on his chest. Ander took the little padlock and holding it between his fingers, showed it to him. 

_-We don't need to put a padlock on this bridge when we can bring it with us._

Omar curved his lips little by little until they turned into a frank smile. He took the little silver lock and looked at it carefully. Before he could say anything, Ander stepped forward.

_-Yes, it has our initials on it. And yes, if you ask me, I had another one made._ -He opened the palm of his hand, and there, another one padlock the same, shone against the light emanating from the lanterns. 

_-Do you want to put it on me?_ -Ander looked at him, studying his reaction.

_-Jodeeer..._ -Omar muttered almost in his whisper. 

After Omar hung the necklace with the little padlock around Ander's neck, he looked into his eyes.

_-Well, it seems that this thing about you, liking cheesy stuff isn't entirely untrue..._

_-Dickhead... I love you_. -Ander murmured against his lips.

Omar kissed him briefly, and once they parted, he heard Omar ask:

_-Ander... Would you like to move in with me?_

Ander felt a turn in his stomach when he heard Omar. He didn't expect Omar to ask him that, so for a moment, he was silent. Omar looked... nervous, and that made him smile.

_-Mmh... I don't know Omar. If I'm honest, I don't know if it's a good idea..._

Omar suddenly became serious as he nodded almost imperceptibly.

_-Right... It's okay. It's just that I thought that now that we're back together and that in a few months we'll be moving to Madrid... well... I thought that..._

_-Omar..._ -Ander interrupted him.

_-Mmh?_ -Omar answered, his eyes showed sadness, and Ander bit his cheeks on the inside to not laugh.

_-Do you want to know why I'm not sure this is a good idea?_

_-Why?_ -Omar asked reluctantly.

_-Because you have a bad habit of sleeping with the curtains open, and I don't know if I can live with that._

- _Gilipollas!_ -Omar giggled, shaking his head. - _Okay... we can keep the curtains closed..._

Ander closed his eyes, cradling him in his arms. The icy wind made them shiver, making them embrace each other even more strongly. Feeling the warmth radiating from Omar's body, he smiled as he brushed his neck with his lips, inhaling his scent. On that same bridge several years earlier, they had made a promise, and that night they were reaffirming it again. This time, being two completely different guys; much more mature and aware that not everything would be easy, but sure that the love they felt for each other was strong enough to overcome any obstacle.

*******


	49. I love you, asshole

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there!  
> The penultimate chapter is ready!  
> I decided to use some iconic phrases from Ander and Omar that they have said throughout these three seasons. It's a kind of tribute to those who created these two amazing characters, telling a beautiful story and giving us a lot of bittersweet moments. I hope you can enjoy this chapter as much as I did.
> 
> As always, I want to thank those who still follow this story and share a comment or a Kudo. It means a lot to me.
> 
> xoxo 🖤💙

*******

_-Ander... Would you like to move in with me?_

Ander felt a turn in his stomach when he heard Omar. He didn't expect Omar to ask him that, so for a moment, he was silent. Omar looked... nervous, and that made him smile.

_-Mmh... I don't know Omar. If I'm honest, I don't know if it's a good idea..._

Omar suddenly became serious as he nodded almost imperceptibly.

_-Right... It's okay. It's just that I thought that now that we're back together and that in a few months we'll be moving to Madrid... well... I thought that..._

_-Omar..._ -Ander interrupted him.

_-Mmh?_ -Omar answered, his eyes showed sadness, and Ander bit his cheeks on the inside to not laugh.

_-Do you want to know why I'm not sure this is a good idea?_

_-Why?_ -Omar asked reluctantly.

_-Because you have a bad habit of sleeping with the curtains open, and I don't know if I can live with that._

- _Gilipollas!_ -Omar giggled, shaking his head. - _Okay... we can keep the curtains closed..._

Ander closed his eyes, cradling him in his arms. The icy wind made them shiver, making them embrace each other even more strongly. Feeling the warmth radiating from Omar's body, he smiled as he brushed his neck with his lips, inhaling his scent. On that same bridge several years earlier, they had made a promise, and that night they were reaffirming it again. This time, being two completely different guys; much more mature and aware that not everything would be easy, but sure that the love they felt for each other was strong enough to overcome any obstacle.

*******

**Chapter 49. I love you, asshole**

**_(Omar)_ **

_Nine months later_

_-Hey, you're home early!_ -Ander smiled warmly as soon as he walked in the door. He was lying on the couch, dressed only in sweatpants, watching TV.

Ander had turned on the heater, so Omar left his jacket and scarf on the coat rack, and taking off his shoes, he plopped down next to him, exhaling a sigh. 

_-A tough day?_ \- Ander pulled him to gave him a brief kiss on the lips. - _You're freezing..._ -He whispered, caressing his cheek.

Omar closed his eyes and ran his hand to his head, massaging his temples. He had had a complicated day and was happy to be back home.

Ander had convinced him to accept the job offer from Netflix, and although he was glad because of everything he had learned in such a short time, there were days like today when the only thing he felt like doing was forgetting about work and spending time with his boyfriend.

_-You have no idea... some actors are a pain in the ass._

_-I bet... although there are a lot of good-looking guys too, huh?_

_-Mmh... A few, but none like you... You're not an actor, but you're definitely the most handsome._

Ander leaned up to massage his shoulders while he let out a chuckle. 

_-Come on, relax, it's already Friday; we have the whole weekend to forget everything... Besides, you should be happy that you will continue working for the same company in Madrid..._

_-Well, that's not a fact yet. They only got me an interview..._

_-Well, yes, one interview, but I'm sure that as soon as they get to know you, they won't hesitate to hire you. You are very good at what you do, and you know it._

Omar smiled as he listened to him and gave him a sloppy kiss on the neck. 

_-By the way, that's not entirely true about relaxing either. Have you already forgotten that first thing tomorrow morning they'll come to take the things we sold?_ -Omar grimaced, pointing with his head to the stacked boxes at the entrance. - _I swear I never thought how exhausting this whole moving process would be._

_-Not to mention that the apartment was furnished... I don't want to imagine if it hadn't been_. -He scoffed. - _But think that in less than a month we will be in Madrid._

_-Speaking of that..._ -Omar turned to see him. - _Lu called me today. She has found a small house that, according to her, is perfect for us; she says it is a bit far from the downtown, but it is worth it. She told me she would send us the pictures to see the house, and if we like it, she'll help us with the paperwork to rent it._

_-A house? Didn't we tell her we were looking for an apartment? I don't think we can afford to rent a house, Omar._ -Ander mumbled, leaning back against the back of the couch.

_-Besides, although I've been sending out resumes, no one has answered me yet, so it might take me a while to get a job, and I don't think what I have saved is enough, you know I don't want you to bear all the expenses._ -He explained, showing a serious look on his face.

- _Calm down, nene... That's exactly what I told her... But she insists that the place is perfect and that, if we like it, she will negotiate with the owner to fit our budget. And knowing Lu, I don't doubt that she will get it. So, we shouldn't worry about that now. Let's see the pics, and if it's as amazing as she says, we'll leave it in her hands_. -Omar reassured him.

_-You're right; Lu can get water from the rocks if she sets her mind to it._ -Ander grimaced before continuing speaking. _-I swear I can't believe it, Omar. Next week I get the university papers, and in a few more days, we'll be ready to move in._

_-These months went by in the blink of an eye_. -Omar confessed, a bit melancholic.

_-Can you believe that we could already have a place to live when we get to Madrid? It sounds too perfect..._

Omar relaxed as soon as he heard that. The next few weeks would probably be a challenge, but once they got to Madrid, everything would be just as Ander said: perfect.

_-I hope so..._ -He smiled.

_-Listen, let's do something. We should go out for dinner, chill... I need it as well... come home and fool around in bed until we fall asleep. How does that sound?_

Omar smiled and leaned forward to kiss him.

_-Hmm... That's a yes, then._ -Ander chuckled against his lips.

*******

They chose to go to _Rabbithole,_ a very cozy industrial-style restaurant that had become one of their favorite places. The prices were quite affordable, and the food was spectacular. It was located on Bedford Avenue, so, due to the proximity, they preferred to walk there, and so Omar was delighted to listen to Ander as he told him about Dumbo's history as a fundamental jewel of Brooklyn, about the historic architecture of the place, the lighting design, as well as the urban planning. It was like having his own guided tour with an expert architect showing him around the neighborhood, and he could only smile at how much Ander was passionate about talking about it.

They were never bored for a single moment, always had a topic of conversation, or, if they preferred, enjoyed each other's company without the need to fill awkward silences between them; their connection had reached such a point that they understood each other with just a glance.

Next spring, it would be nine years since they had seen each other on that bridge for the first time, and it was fascinating when he discovered some new facet of Ander hitherto unknown to him. Such as the weakness he had for apple pie with vanilla ice cream.

Dinner was spent among laughter, good food, and endless talks planning their future. A couple of hours later, they set off on their way back home. When they reached their apartment, Ander plopped down on the couch, stifling a yawn.

_-We shouldn't have ordered that dessert!_ -He complained, running his hand over his belly. _-I'm so full..._

- _You always say the same thing, but when we're there, you can't hold back_... -Omar rebutted, kissing him on his curls. - _I'm going to take a shower._

_-Okay..._ -He mumbled distractedly while looking at Instagram.

Ten minutes later, he was about to get out of the shower when he heard Ander entering the bathroom to brush his teeth.

_-Omar, your cell phone has been ringing. I'll leave it here, okay?_

He had barely finished speaking when the cell phone rang again. Omar opened the door and, grabbing a towel to dry himself, asked Ander to answer.

_-Who is it?_ -he murmured.

_-No idea..._ -Ander replied, looking at the screen. - _Someone named Todrick._

_-Can you put it on speaker? My hands are wet..._

Ander did so, and immediately a husky voice was heard:

_"Omar?"_

_-Yes?_

_"This is Todrick; how are you?_

_-I'm fine, how are you?_

Ander finished brushing his teeth and went to the bedroom. As Omar dried off, he saw out of the corner of his eye that Ander was undressing, then plopping down on the bed. Todrick he knew only slightly, as he was one of the production techs on the new shoot, so it was strange to him that he'd dialed him in on a Friday night.

_"I'm okay, thanks, Omar. Hey, I'm calling because you forgot the shooting plan on your desk..."_

_-Jodeeer!_ -He hissed, putting a hand to his neck. _-Really?_

_"Yeah, but don't worry, I've got it. I'd like to hand it over to you... and also I was wondering if... would you like to have a drink with me, what do you say?"_

As soon as he heard that, he looked into the room and saw Ander looking at him with a gesture of disbelief. Of course, he had overheard the conversation, and his face said it all. His colleague's proposal had surprised him because he had never given him cause to believe that he was interested in him. The only thing he had done was being kind. He was silent for a few seconds, not knowing what to answer.

_"Omar? Are you still there?"_

_-Eh... yes, I'm here._

_"So? Would you like to?"_

_-Eh... I can't. I'm sorry, man._

_"Are you sure? It's Friday... we could have a good time and get to know each other better... You know what I mean…"_

_-I really can't_. -He mumbled, feeling his heart pounding hard against his chest. _"What the hell was wrong with this guy?"_

_"Okay. It seems I misunderstood the signs... rest. Ah! And don't worry about the document, I'll give it to you on Monday when I see you."_

Omar hung up and stood there looking at his cell phone. That had been weird as fuck, and he had a clear idea of how Ander would take it after seeing his face. He adjusted the towel around his waist and walked out of the bathroom, feeling an unpleasant sensation in his stomach. As soon as he reached the room and made eye contact with Ander, he confirmed that he was in trouble.

_-Ander... I don't know what you're thinking, but it's not what it looks like._ -He mumbled, approaching him.

Ander was pissed off and didn't attempt to hide it.

_-Who the fuck is that asshole?_ -He hissed.

Ander clenched his jaw tightly as he looked at him expectantly. The serious look on his face was enough for Omar to decide not to go any further.

_-He's a colleague from work... And before you ask me more, I don't know why he asked me out. I've barely crossed a couple of words with him, and evidently, I've never given him cause to think I'm into him._

_-Aha... He misread the signs, no?_

_-Ander, he's wrong. I was kind, that's all._

_-Well… He thinks you like him. I can't imagine why. -_ He hissed with disdain.

_-Ander... Look at me. I don't like the tone you're using._

_-What tone, Omar? What tone?_ -Ander grunted, bringing his hands to his face to rub his eyelids hard.

_-That tone. As if you doubt what I'm telling you_. -Without realizing it, he put a hand to his mouth and began biting his nails.

_-Never mind, forget it_... -Ander whispered, closing his eyes.

_-No. I don't want to... Come on, say what's on your mind._

Ander was silent for a few seconds before standing up and moving closer to him to the point where he could feel Ander's breath just inches from his face.

_-Well, it's not fucking funny that an asshole is hitting on you, and you don't stop him! -_ As he spoke, he raised his voice higher and higher. - _That's what's wrong with me, dammit!_

_-Ander, I didn't know what to say... He took me by surprise._ -He whispered, still looking him in the eyes.

_-How about something as simple as: "I'm not interested in going out with you because I have a boyfriend?"_ -He replied in a mocking tone.

_-Ander..._

Ander let out a sort of snort, and seconds later, he muttered: _-You know what? Forget it._

Ander reluctantly pushed aside the sheets and lay down with his back to him, leaving him there like a jerk, looking at him and not knowing what else to say. Since they had been back, they had never fought about anything like this. They'd had a few arguments like any couple over inconsequential issues, but it had been a long time since he'd seen him this pissed off.

He let out the air he had been holding in, and, shaking his head slightly from side to side, he walked back to the bathroom. He brushed his teeth, put on the boxers he had left there, and looked at himself in the mirror. He couldn't believe the night would end like this, and even more so when he knew he wasn't to blame for what had happened.

When he returned to the room again, Ander was no longer there. He got that he was pissed off because if things had been the other way around, he would be too. But unlike Ander, he would listen to him and believe him. Quietly, he lay on his back and let out a long sigh. Maybe he should wait until his anger passed; he could talk to him the next day and make him realize that what had happened wasn't his fault, but he didn't want to go to sleep knowing that Ander was pissed at him. So, ignoring that voice in his head telling him it wasn't the wisest decision, he stood up and left the room to find him. 

Ander was lying on the couch. His eyes were closed, but thanks to the moonlight filtering through the large window, Omar could see him clench his jaw tightly. He reached over to him and touched him gently on the shoulder. Immediately, he felt Ander's body tense up, but still, he didn't open his eyes.

_-Ander..._

_-I don't want to talk anymore, Omar. Let me sleep._

_-Ander, please... You're irrational._ -He insisted, grabbing him by the arm to force him to look at him.

_-I've already told you I don't want to talk now. Please don't make things worse._ -He hissed, reluctantly pulling out of his grip.

Omar took a deep breath and, without thinking twice, straddled him and, grabbing him by the wrists, tried to immobilize him.

_-You're going to listen to me even if I have to force you, do you hear me?_

_-Let go of me..._ -Ander whispered hoarsely, staring at him.

Omar could see the anger in his face, and for a moment, he felt shivers.

_-No!_ -Omar yelled, grabbing him tighter as soon as he felt Ander trying to free himself. _-Hey, listen to me, for fuck's sake! You're the man I love and the one I've decided to be with. You know that..._

Ander bit his lower lip so hard that for a moment, Omar thought he would bleed it. Ander was stronger than him, so the next thing happened so fast, he couldn't do anything when Ander broke free of his grip and turning his body, he was on top of him on the wide couch, gripping him by the wrists just as he had done moments before.

They were both breathing raggedly from the struggle, staring unblinkingly at each other. His gaze shifted from Omar's eyes to his mouth, and before he could say anything else, Ander kissed him furiously. 

His kisses were hard and demanding, and Omar soon surrendered to him. Ander dropped the weight of his body on top of his and, releasing him by the wrists, brought both hands to each side of his face to kiss him without giving him a breath. It seemed that Ander wanted to show him that Omar belonged to him with every kiss, and far from annoying him, he could only turn him on. Ander broke the contact only to start tracing a series of wet kisses along his neck and chest; he used his teeth, lips, and tongue, and Omar knew from the intensity with which he kissed him that it would leave marks.

[ ](https://ibb.co/LrJyG0Z)

When he stopped feeling Ander's weight on his body, he opened his eyes, only to meet the look of determination on his face. Ander removed Omar's boxers and, hooking his arms around his legs, settled him somewhat roughly on the edge of the couch. Neither of them said anything; only the ragged breaths of both could be heard mingling with each other. Omar saw him kneel on the wooden floor to get in front of him on the edge of the couch. Then, Ander spread Omar's legs and spat against his ass. By this time, he was already so hard that he cared about nothing but feeling him inside him.

Without warning, Ander pushed hard against his ass, and Omar let out a groan, grabbing onto him; Ander let out a gasp as he fucked into him, forcing Omar to close his eyes and press his lips tightly to hold back the next moan that threatened to come from his throat. He could feel the pain, the burning of his skin from the thrust, but a few seconds later, that pain transformed into a sensation so pleasurable that he thought he might die right then and there. Ander kept moving rhythmically, thrusting in and out of him with increasing ease, repeatedly stimulating that sensitive spot. 

Nothing more was needed. He didn't even have to jerk off, because almost without warning, that spiral of sensations was growing inside him until he exploded. His body began to tremble from the intense spasms he was experiencing, and almost immediately, he cum on his belly. His heart pounded hard against his chest as he tried to catch his breath. When he felt Ander come completely out of him, Omar opened his eyes, and the next thing he saw turned him on so much that for a moment, he thought he might get hard again. 

Ander had not yet cum; on the contrary, he was still so hard that, upon seeing him, Omar reflexively ran his tongue over his lips. He tried to lean up to take Ander's cock in his mouth, but Ander prevented him from doing so. With one hand, he pushed him gently against the couch, and immediately, Omar saw him run his fingers across his abdomen to gather the warm semen. Once he got almost all of it, Ander slipped his fingers inside him to lube him with his own sperm, and afterward, he slipped back into him a couple more times before standing up.

_-Come here..._ -He heard Ander huskily whisper, placing him face down along the length of the couch.

Omar obeyed without hesitation, and once he had him in the position Ander wanted, he laid down over his back. Omar felt Ander's fingers spurring him on for a few seconds before slipping back inside him. Once he got it, he began to move slowly this time. He slipped both arms under Omar's chest to let his hands wrap around his neck, pressing him just hard enough not to hurt him but to show him a sensation hitherto unknown.

As he felt Ander move gently but deeply inside him, his own body began to awaken again; his cock began to gather hardness against the soft fabric of the couch once more. The friction was pleasant torture, as well as Ander's breathing and moaning against his skin as he moved, and the tight feeling against his neck was enough for him to cum like a horny teenager again. 

This time, Ander spurted at the same time; a bit inside him, and then he felt the rest of his cum spurting out of his body to drip onto his cheeks. With a final moan, he dropped down on top of him, still hugging him. Both struggling to regain control of their breathing and waiting for their heartbeats to return to a normal rhythm. 

Omar didn't know at what moment he fell asleep; he only felt Ander's warm hands, moving him slightly to wake him up. It was still early morning when he opened his eyes, and for a moment, he felt disoriented until the memories of what they had done flashed into his mind.

_-Come on, let's go to bed._ -Ander hummed, holding out a hand to him.

Omar said nothing; he just nodded, and taking Ander's offered hand, he let himself be dragged into the bedroom. When they reached the bed, neither of them spoke. Ander plopped down on the bed, and Omar mimicked him by lying down next to him. He didn't know what to say... his mind was spinning, thinking of the right words, but before he could find them, he felt Ander's arms wrap around his body to drag him against him. They stayed like that, silent, as Ander gently caressed his body until finally, sleep overcame him.

*******

The smell of bacon and freshly brewed coffee woke him up. Omar inhaled deeply, still with his eyes closed, letting that pleasant aroma slowly invade his senses, and in response, his stomach began to protest with hunger. As he stretched his arms and legs, he felt a slight ache, a reminder of what he and Ander had shared the night before. He opened his eyes and rolled over on his side, only to find that the bed was empty beside him.

He got out of bed and opened the dresser to find some boxers and a clean t-shirt. Once he was ready, he took a deep breath and let the air out a bit at a time in an attempt to calm himself. Despite what had happened a few hours earlier, he was slightly nervous about running into Ander. 

Barefoot, he walked on the wooden stave, but he stopped a couple of meters before reaching the kitchen. Ander was sitting with his back to him on one of the stools in front of the kitchen island, drinking coffee. Apparently, he hadn't been as quiet as he had thought since Ander turned the stool to face him. For a few seconds, neither of them said anything, Ander's gaze was indecipherable, and as much as Omar wanted to read him, it was in vain.

_-Hey... Good morning..._ -Ander mumbled; barely an attempt of a smile was drawn on his face.

_-Morning..._ -Omar replied, trying to smile as well.

_-Come, sit down. I made you breakfast._ -He hummed, standing up.

It was at that moment that Omar noticed that, on the kitchen counter, there was fruit, coffee, bread, and a couple of plates arranged one in front of the other.

_-Why?_ -He asked, unable to hide his surprise.

_-Well, that's my way of saying I'm sorry._ -Ander answered, approaching him.

Omar said nothing. He couldn't. He felt a lump in his throat due to the tears that threatened to come out. Ander took him by the chin and looked him in the eyes.

_-I don't know what happened to me yesterday. Jealousy clouded my mind, Omar. I trust you, but when you didn't make it clear to that jerk why you couldn't go out with him... I don't know; I lost my mind... Forgive me, please._

_-Ander, I love you... never doubt that what I want is to be by your side._

_-I know, and I also want you to be by my side... always._ -Ander kissed him gently for a moment and then wrapped his arms around his waist.

_-And... I also want you to forgive me because last night I behaved like a fucking caveman... I... I was rough with you. Did I hurt you?_ -he asked in a whisper.

Omar hugged him tightly as he heard him. He loved this man more than he could have ever imagined being able to love, and he couldn't conceive of his life without him.

_-You didn't hurt me..._ -He whispered against Ander's neck. 

Ander moved away to look him in the eyes. His gaze showed concern and regret.

_-Really? I promise it won't happen again..._

_-What are you saying, dickhead?_ -Omar smiled. _-Last night, I had one of the most intense orgasms I've experienced in a long time. So as long as it happens again without you being pissed off at me, believe me, I'm going to enjoy it._

_-Vale... So, will you forgive me?_ -Ander grinned in response, not hiding the love he felt for him.

Omar closed his eyes and kissed him gently. Seconds later, he curved his lips in a soft smile and joked: _-Mmh… No._

Ander grinned and kissed him back. Then, he took him by the hand and dragged him to the bar to serve him breakfast.

_-What about the boxes?_ -Omar asked as he noticed that the corridor was clear and there was no sign of the boxes.

_-The buyers already came for them. You were sound asleep, and I didn't want to wake you up. I helped them take them down and left the money in the dresser drawer in the hallway._ He explained matter-of-factly.

_-Right, thank you._ -Omar nodded, taking a sip of his coffee.

As they had breakfast, Omar glanced sideways at him and couldn't help but let his smile widen as he did so. There was no doubt that he still had many facets of Ander to discover; he also knew that this would be neither the first nor the last fight they would have, but what he was sure of was that together, they would be able to solve any problem that would come their way in the future.

*******


	50. There is no love like ours (Part one)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> First of all, I want to thank everyone who follows this fic. It means a lot to me.
> 
> The final chapter is here. It's just that when I finished it, I realized it was very long (more than 8K words), that's why I decided to split it into two final chapters. Here is the first one. 
> 
> This time the whole chapter has Ander's and Omar's POV simultaneously.
> 
> I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
> 
> xoxo 🖤💙

*******

_-Vale... So, will you forgive me?_ -Ander grinned in response, not hiding the love he felt for him.

Omar closed his eyes and kissed him gently. Seconds later, he curved his lips in a soft smile and joked: _-Mmh… No._

Ander grinned and kissed him back. Then, he took him by the hand and dragged him to the bar to serve him breakfast.

As they had breakfast, Omar glanced sideways at him and couldn't help but let his smile widen as he did so. There was no doubt that he still had many facets of Ander to discover; he also knew that this would be neither the first nor the last fight they would have, but what he was sure of was that together, they would be able to solve any problem that would come their way in the future.

*******

**Chapter 50. There is no love like ours**

** (Part one) **

**_(Ander / Omar)_ **

_Three weeks later_

_-Ander, come on, give me a hand to close the suitcase, tío!_ -Omar groaned as he sat on it once again to try to close it.

Leaning against the doorjamb and with his arms crossed against his chest, Ander watched him in amusement. It looked as if Omar was fighting a battle of death against the huge suitcase.

_-You know they're going to charge you overweight luggage anyway, don't you?_ -He laughed, unable to contain himself when he saw the steely determination on Omar's face.

_-Stop mocking me and get your cute ass over here_. -Omar growled in a tone that brooked no argument. Deep down, he knew Ander was right, but he didn't want to give up yet.

Ander rolled his eyes, shaking his head, but still, he decided to please his boyfriend, just so he could say, _"I told you so."_

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

_-Come on, you try._ -He teased, sitting on the suitcase and pushing him lightly so that he would stand up and try to close it. - _But I want you to be aware that if you break the zipper, you'll have to buy not one but two suitcases._

Omar gave him a pointed look, and biting his lip, began to pull the zipper. When he saw that all his efforts were useless and that, if he kept pulling, the only thing he would achieve would be to break it, he let out a sigh and dropped onto the bed.

_-Jodeeer! What can I do about it? I've already gotten rid of a lot of stuff... I refuse to give away my clothes too._

_-Omar, I don't want to say it, but... I told you so._ -He chuckled when he saw Omar's annoyed face.

_-It was obvious that the suitcase was not going to close._ -He spoke again, this time in a condescending tone as if he were trying to explain to a small child why one plus one added up to two.

_-Look, I still have some space in mine. Hand me some of your clothes and let's buy another suitcase to pack the rest._ -He proposed without making the slightest attempt to hide a smug look.

_-Aghhh! Please remind me why it's all worth it..._ -He whined, moving closer towards Ander so he could hug him.

Ander grinned with a shrug. _-Do you want me to list all the reasons? Or is it enough to remind you how much I love you?_ -He hummed, kissing Omar softly on the forehead.

Omar felt his heart melt as he felt Ander's warm lips against his skin. He would never get tired of hearing him say how much he loved him. 

_-Okay... Let's buy the fucking suitcase..._ -He sighed, but still not releasing himself from Ander's arms.

*******

Two hours later, they arrived back at the apartment with his new acquisition. Omar had a smile almost as huge as the new suitcase he had chosen, and as he was packing, Ander decided to sit next to him to keep him company. This would be their last weekend in New York, and their friends -led by Tom-, had organized a party to give them a proper farewell.

_-Joder, Omar!_ -He whistled, seeing the millimetric way in which Omar folded each garment until it was super compact. - _I'm not trying to pressure you, but we have to be at the party in less than two hours. We can't be late..._ -He mumbled.

_-Well, I feel pressured, tío. So, it would be nice if you could help me out instead of just sitting there. That way, we'd finish faster..._ -Omar barked, as he rolled up one of his t-shirts like he had seen Marie Kondo do on her TV show.

_-And listen to you complaining because I don't know how to fold clothes properly? No... No way._ -Ander refused, dropping his head back on the pillow. This whole issue really amused him, as he had never thought how intense Omar could be about such things.

_-Okay, it's not a big deal anyway..._ -He hissed, pretending to feel hurt.

_-Or… You could pack tomorrow and take a shower with me now. How does it sound to you?_ -He winked, hoping to be convincing enough to dissuade him.

Hearing him, he dropped the shirt and turned to look at him. Lying on his side, Ander watched him with that cocky smile he usually used when he wanted to get his way, and once again, he had succeeded. 

_-Why am I so weak?_ -He growled, leaving the suitcase wide open as he jumped to his feet to drag him into the bathroom.

After making love in the shower, Omar came out feeling much more relaxed. That night seemed to promise a lot. It would be the last time he would be spending time with his pals and with Ander's pals, who in the end, had become good friends of his as well. And although it caused him a bit of melancholy, he knew it was worth it for the simple fact that he and Ander would be together.

His phone started ringing, and he quickly left the bathroom to pick it up. As soon as he heard Lu's familiar voice, he cracked a smile.

_"Hi, handsome, how are you?"_

_-Fine, Lu. And you? What news do you have for us?_

When Ander realized that Lu was speaking, he approached Omar without being able to hide his nervousness. The moment they had seen the pics Lu had mailed them, he and Omar instantly fell in love with the house, so they had given her the go-ahead to negotiate.

_"I'm doing great, Omar. Is Ander with you?_

_-Yes, he's here by my side..._ -He mumbled, glancing at his boyfriend.

_"Put me on speaker..."_ -Lu asked.

_-Hey Lu..._ -Ander greeted and immediately shouted: - _Tell us that you made it!_

They both looked at each other expectantly, waiting for her answer.

_"Ander Muñoz, did you really doubt my persuasiveness at some point?_

_-Does that mean we already have a house?_ -Omar asked, widening his smile with each passing second.

_"You have to promise me that as soon as you are settled in, I will be in charge of organizing the open house party."_

_-Jodeeer, Lu! You are amazing!_ -Omar yelled, leaning his head on Ander's shoulder.

_-We have the house!_ -Ander whispered against Omar's hair, still not believing it.

The original price was way over their budget, but Lu had insisted that she could get it, and she did so. Ander had no idea how she had pulled it off, but he felt so happy that nothing else mattered to him.

_"Well, guys... I'm glad you're happy, but... there's just one little thing..."_

As soon as they heard her, they both looked at each other, wiping the smile off their faces.

_"I got the owner to lower the rent as promised, but... he's handing over the keys in a month."_

_-You're kidding, right Lu?_ -Omar asked incredulously.

_"No, sorry, I'm not kidding, but it's only a month, so it's not a big deal either. But you guys can stay at my place meanwhile."_

_-No, Lu... You've done enough, and we're very grateful for it. As you say, it's only a month, so we'll see how we'll manage._ -Ander thanked her.

_"Okay, so I'll see you on Sunday then. I'll go with Nadia and Guzman to pick you up at the airport. Love you both!"_

_-We'll see you then, gorgeous!_ -Omar grinned before hanging up.

_-Well... it's not a big deal, right? We can talk about it tomorrow and plan where we'll stay in the meantime._ -Ander suggested, trying to sound optimistic.

- _Sure, let's talk about it later._ -Omar agreed, kissing him on the cheek before getting dressed.

*******

_-It was supposed to be a party with our closest friends, wasn't it?_ -Omar raised his voice to make himself heard over the music as he stared in astonishment at the bunch of people inside the house.

_-What can I tell you? You know how Tom is..._

Ander lifted his shoulders as he made his way through the crowd. Few faces looked familiar, but knowing Tom, he wasn't surprised that his friend had invited almost half the college's students either. Omar was walking beside him, and he seemed to have read Ander's mind, as he approached him again, mumbling in his ear:

_-You don't say... By the way, whose house is this?_

_-I have no idea... Tom just sent me the location. Let's try to find out._

A while later, they succeeded. Tom was in the kitchen with Josh and the rest of their friends drinking shots, and as soon as he saw them appear, he threw his arms up in the air in excitement. The next few minutes, both Ander and Omar spent greeting their friends and toasting with them. 

The night was turning out better than Omar expected. Not only were Ander's friends there but his friends as well. Apparently, Tom was the best _PR_ there could be, as he had talked to them and invited them to the party. They soon discovered that the house belonged to a friend of a friend of Tom's girlfriend, and he had been responsible for inviting the rest of the people that neither Ander nor Omar knew.

When Omar ran into Matt and Jules, he hugged them warmly. While he hadn't lost touch with them since he had finished college, they had rarely met again, and much of it was because he hadn't wanted to bump into Keith.

_-Ander, this is Matt and Jules, my friends from college. I don't know if you remember them.._. -He said aloud as Ander approached them.

_-Of course, I do. -_ Ander replied, grinning as he greeted them.

- _Guys, this is Ander, my boyfriend._

They were chatting for a while until Matt and Jules left for a drink. Omar moved a little to face him, and placing his arms around Ander's neck, asked him:

[ ](https://ibb.co/GpdgnVh)

- _Are you having a good time, nene?_

_-Better than I expected, indeed._ -Ander slipped a hand around his neck and pulled him close to brush his lips briefly. 

When they stepped apart, Ander noticed someone approaching them, and when he fixed his eyes on the newcomer, he couldn't help but feel a flip in the stomach. As best he could, he tried to appear calm before turning to Omar.

- _Look who's here..._ -Ander whispered in his ear.

Omar noticed that Ander's expression turned serious, and before he could ask him what he meant, he heard Keith's unmistakable voice behind him.

_-Hello..._

As soon as Omar made eye contact with Keith, he felt his mouth go dry, and his hands began to sweat. He hadn't expected Keith to show up that night, let alone approach them after the last talk they had had months ago.

He glanced sideways at Ander, worried about his reaction, but his boyfriend looked calm; anyone else seeing them would think they had run into an old friend, but Omar knew Ander so well, he knew the effort he was making to remain even-tempered. The only thing that gave him away was the tightness with which Ander clenched his jaw and the somewhat possessive way in which he had dropped his hand around his waist.

_-Keith..._ -He babbled. - _It is quite a surprise to see you here._ -They were the only words he managed to say.

At that moment, he would have liked the earth to open up and swallow him. Everything had been flowing so well, the last thing he wanted was to argue with Ander because of Keith. 

_-Hey..._ -Ander grumbled, turning to Keith. 

Omar looked at Ander for a few seconds and then turned his attention to Keith. As he did so, his mind began to project a series of rather unpleasant images; in each one of them, Ander and Keith ended up punching each other.

_-Hey.._. -Keith nodded, without looking away from Ander.

_-I heard you're leaving_. -Keith muttered, turning to Omar.

_-Yes...-_ Omar barely managed to answer in a whisper. - _Ander and I are going back to Madrid. We're together now._

_-I see..._ -He nodded, looking at them. - _Well, I came to wish you the best... To wish you both the best_. -He corrected himself, turning to Ander.

_-Thanks._ -Ander growled in a calm tone but without smiling. Omar was looking for the right words when Ander mumbled.

_-I'm going to get something to drink; I'll be right back._ -Then Ander looked at Keith, nodded slightly in farewell, and left without giving Omar time to say anything else.

Omar didn't know what to do, whether to stay there or go after Ander, but deep down, he wanted to talk to Keith and find out how he was doing. As he decided what to do next, he began to bite his nails without realizing it.

_-It seems that Ander still doesn't like me, and I don't blame him._ -Keith blurted out with a hint of sarcasm.

Omar ignored his comment and asked instead:

_-How have you been?_

- _Well, I can't complain. I'm working on a couple of projects with a local TV station and doing some stuff here and there... you know._

_-Right..._ -Omar mumbled, shifting uncomfortably in his place, as he looked out of the corner of his eye towards the crowd to see if he could spot Ander.

_-So... When are you leaving?_

_-On Sunday._

_-Wow..._ -He muttered, unable to hide the sadness on his face. - _So, I guess this will be the last time we see each other then?_

Omar said nothing.

_-When Jules told me, I was a bit surprised, if I'm honest. And I was very hesitant to come, but I know that if I hadn't, I would have regretted it, Omar._

Omar smirked with a certain melancholy as he listened to him. After so many months of not hearing from him, he was glad to see him. He hadn't been able to shake off the guilt about the way he had behaved towards him. He knew he had been cruel, and although he had tried to talk to him to make things right, he hadn't blamed him because Keith hadn't wanted to hear him at that time.

_-Keith... I'm really sorry_. - He blurted out suddenly. He needed to tell him how he felt. - _I'm sorry I wasn't able to fall in love with you... because I'm sure any guy or girl would have killed to be in my place._

_-Hey..._ -He cut him off. - _Don't go that way, Omar... It's been a long time, and I'm fine now. And for that reason, I wanted to come and say goodbye to you. Because before anything else, you and I have always been good friends. And I want you to know that, for me, you will always be... Even if you live on the other side of the world._

_-Joder..._ -Omar hissed, letting out a sigh. - _You don't know what it means to me to hear you talk like that. -_ He was sincere.

Keith shrugged. - _Now I realize I never had a chance. It was always Ander, wasn't it?_

- _I'm sorry._ -Omar nodded, biting his lower lip.

_-Come on, don't be. Come here, you idiot._ -Keith urged him, holding out his arms.

_-I wish you both the best; I really do. And I hope that this time, that dickhead is aware of the incredible human being he has by his side_... -Keith whispered in his ear.

Ander came out of the kitchen with a beer in his hand and immediately looked in their direction. He paused for a moment, thinking about what he should do. Keith was talking, and Omar was listening attentively. A few seconds later, he witnessed Keith approach Omar and pull him into his arms, only for Omar to return the embrace.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Ander ran a hand to the back of his neck, massaging it, then took a big sip of his beer. He pressed his lips tightly and, with firm steps, headed for the garden.

He felt slightly dazed because he had never expected to meet him again. And for that very reason, he hadn't known how to react. He lit a cigarette and started to walk away from the people. He needed to think and clear his head. He knew perfectly well what Keith had meant to Omar, and that was why he had decided to leave them alone.

He took the last drag and dropped the cigarette on the grass to extinguish it with the sneaker. When he looked up, he spotted Omar walking toward him with some hesitation. When they were a couple of meters away, he heard him say in a low voice:

_-I was looking for you. I thought you just went to get something to drink._

_-I'm sorry... I just wanted to get some fresh air._ -He muffled, taking a sip of his beer.

_-Ander... Are you upset?_

Ander could see uncertainty in Omar's eyes, so, without hesitation, he shook his head in denial.

_-Come..._

Omar took a deep breath and stepped forward until he was face to face with him. He wanted to know what Ander was thinking, but most of all, he wanted to tell him how important it had been for him to have that conversation with Keith to bring closure to that part of his life, and that, regardless, it changed absolutely nothing between the two of them.

_-Ander... I..._

_-Shhh..._ -Ander hummed as he opened his arms to cradle him between them.

As soon as he had Omar against his chest, realizing the intensity of his love for him, shook him. Today more than ever, it was clear to him what Omar meant in his life, and nothing and no one could change that. Not now, not ever.

_-I love you..._ -Ander whispered.

_-Does that mean you're not pissed off?_ -Omar had to ask.

The way Ander was behaving was so unusual, he needed to look him in the eyes to make sure everything was okay between the two of them.

- _No, I'm not upset... Should I be?_ -he asked, raising an eyebrow.

_-No... It's just that I'm surprised by your attitude. I was afraid you might think that..._

_-Omar..._ -He interrupted him. - _I'm glad you were able to talk to him. Even if you don't tell me, I know that he was someone important in your life, and I also know that he was there for you in one of the toughest moments. Now I can see it from another perspective, and even though I don't like the guy at all, I thank him for what he did for you._

- _Joder…_ -Omar hissed. - _You're really changing, you asshole..._ -He muttered without being able to hide a smile.

_-I hope you make it up to me tonight_ … -Ander joked. _-Come on, let's go inside to say goodbye to everyone._

That night they didn't make love. Both were exhausted from chatting and dancing with their friends until almost dawn. It was a party full of surprises and mixed emotions that they both enjoyed intensely. So, when they got home, they just hugged each other until they fell fast asleep in each other's arms.

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you like both POV at the same time?


	51. There is no love like ours (Part two)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi!
> 
> The final chapter is here... And I have to say I have mixed feelings. There were 5K words left in theory, but I decided to add a few more scenes when I reread the chapter, so there are 8K (Maybe it's because I refuse to let them go... 😏)
> 
> I'm both very excited and very sad as I share this last chapter with you guys.
> 
> When I wrote the last paragraph, I realized that I won't update this fic anymore, but I guess it is time.
> 
> Thank you all for staying with me for so long (a little over a year and a half since I started this series), especially those of you for always leaving such lovely comments or leaving a Kudo.
> 
> What started as a crazy idea turned into a story full of emotions, and it was all thanks to the incredible response I received from all of you. So, in the end, it became something exceptional and dear to me.
> 
> I hope that you love this ending as much as I do.
> 
> Thank you!
> 
> xoxo 🖤💙

*******

- _Joder…_ -Omar hissed. - _You're really changing, you asshole..._ -He muttered without being able to hide a smile.

_-I hope you make it up to me tonight_ … -Ander joked. _-Come on, let's go inside to say goodbye to everyone._

That night they didn't make love. Both were exhausted from chatting and dancing with their friends until almost dawn. It was a party full of surprises and mixed emotions that they both enjoyed intensely. So, when they got home, they just hugged each other until they fell fast asleep in each other's arms.

*******

**Chapter 51. There is no love like ours**

** (Part two) **

**_(Ander / Omar)_ **

Madrid in December was beautiful. Not only because of the Christmas decorations but also because of the festive atmosphere everywhere. But unlike other years, this time the whole city was covered in snow. After several years, it had snowed, making them feel like they had arrived in Switzerland and not Spain.

_-Holy shit! I can't believe it..._ -Omar whistled, getting into Guzman's van once everyone had said hello. - _This storm blew in hard, didn't it?_ -He rubbed his hands, grateful for the warmth radiating from the heating.

_-Yeah!_ -Lu giggled as if she were a little girl excited about the snow, making everyone burst out laughing. _-Isn't it great? We could organize something and go out and have fun!_

_-You're more excited than our daughter. Who would say so, Lu_... -Guzman chuckled not hiding the amusement in his eyes.

As Lu had promised, she had gone with Nadia and Guzman to pick them up at the airport. It had been quite a challenge since the streets were practically covered with snow, but in the end, they had managed to arrive on time.

_-Welcome, you are finally here!_ -Nadia shouted excitedly from the front seat.

_-How was the flight?_ -Guzman asked almost at the same time, looking at them through the rear-view mirror, unable to hide his joy for having them back.

_-It was fine..._ -Ander smiled briefly.

_-We're finally home..._ -Omar hummed against Ander's neck so that only he could hear him.

Ander looked at him sideways and mumbled something akin to a yes. Of course, that fact did not go unnoticed by Lu, who was sitting next to Omar, so, looking at Ander with a raised eyebrow, she asked with her characteristic Mexican accent:

_-What's wrong, Ander? You don't look well, honey..._

Omar let out a sigh and, pushing Ander's head gently, answered for him:

_-He's pissed off because I won't stay with him and Azucena while they give us the house's keys._

_-Oops..._ -Lu muttered, amused.

Ander rolled his eyes and looked at the window without saying a word. He knew it was foolish, but just thinking that he would be sleeping alone for a whole month made him sick. When he had suggested Omar that they could stay at his mother's house and he had told him that he preferred to stay with his parents, his answer had hit him like a bucket of cold water. As much as he had tried to convince Omar the best way he knew, Omar had not given in, arguing that he wanted to spend time with them and although he understood that it really pissed him off.

_-So that's the reason why you're in a bad mood, macho?_ -Guzman laughed. - _Be patient, Ander! You both will have all the time to do whatever you please._

_-That's not funny at all._ -He grunted, sulking.

Omar smiled, looking at him with affection, and wrapped an arm around his neck, kissed him on the cheek.

_-It's only a few days, Ander. Besides, your mother has invited me to spend Christmas with you -you know it's not celebrated in my house-, so I'll stay with you that night._

_-A night of thirty... Wow..._ -He hissed reluctantly, making everyone burst into laughter.

- _Okay, you'll sort it out later. My parents are expecting us for dinner tonight._ -Nadia intervened with a smile. - _By the way, Marina is with them, and she is anxious to see you both._

Listening to Nadia, Ander could not suppress a smile. He missed Marina very much, that girl had stolen his heart, and he was looking forward to seeing her. He would try to convince Omar later to at least stay with him on weekends.

When they arrived at Omar's parents' house, they were already waiting for them with the table set, and dinner served. The Shanna home was small, but Ander had always found it cozy. Omar ran to hug Marina while he fidgeted nervously, watching Guzman greet his in-laws. 

When it was his turn, he extended a hesitant hand toward Omar's father and gave his mother a fleeting smile. He felt somewhat out of place seeing the camaraderie that existed between Guzman and Yusef. Even Lu seemed like another daughter because of the natural way she addressed them. So, when Marina came up to him and hugged him excitedly, Ander hugged her back tightly, feeling grateful that at least the little girl saw him as part of the family.

When they all sat down to dinner, Ander was silently grateful that Omar took the empty place next to him. Although Omar had assured him that his parents approved their relationship, he couldn't help but feel like an intruder. He thought that, deep down, Omar's parents would have liked their son to have married any of the Muslim girls who lived nearby, not to be in a relationship with a man, and that, to top it off, he was a Christian. What they didn't know was that none of those girls would be able to love their son with the devotion with which he did.

That had been one reason he had asked Omar to stay with him in the first place. Because unlike Omar's parents, Ander knew that his mother saw Omar as if he were another son, and being in her house, he felt free to kiss or hug him if he felt like it, even in front of her. Omar's hand on his made him put aside his thoughts. He quickly looked around, feeling nervous about Omar touching him in front of them.

_-Are you okay, Ander?_ -Omar whispered, giving him a loving look.

_-Yes, everything's fine..._ -He murmured in response, picking up his fork to subtly break the contact with his hand.

Omar noticed how uncomfortable Ander felt, and the attentive look his parents were giving them didn't help at all. So, he had tried to let him know that everything was fine but realized too late that touching him had only made him more nervous. He was grateful that his boyfriend was making an effort to spend time with his family, as he knew it wasn't easy for him. 

After the talk he had had with his father months ago, he felt much more relaxed, even happy, to spend time with his family and Ander at the same table. And even though on more than one occasion he had assured Ander that his parents were okay with their relationship, Ander had been reluctant to believe him. He knew it would take time, but he was sure that, in the future, Ander would fit in the same way as Guzman had done long ago.

Yusef's insistent gaze forced Ander to look up. Somewhat self-consciously, he looked at him and met sympathetic eyes.

_-Ander, we are glad to know that you are also back. Omar has told us that both of you will receive the house's keys you have rented in just under a month._

Yusef's words, along with the warm smile he gave him, caught him off guard, so, swallowing his mouthful, he looked around for Omar to rescue him. It was not Omar but Lu who finally spoke, and as soon as he heard her, Ander wished she had not.

_-The house is beautiful. From the moment I saw it, I knew it would be perfect for them. It has a great garden, and I'm sure that when you and your wife come to see it, you'll love it too_. -She said without any qualms.

_-Yes, Lu is right..._ -He agreed when he could find his voice. - _The spaces are vast, and the large windows let the light in from several angles, giving it a lot of brightness._

_-The architect has spoken..._ -Omar intervened, with a proud smile on his face. - _Seriously, when we are settled in, we would love for you to come and see it, right, Ander?_

_-Of course._ -Ander nodded, feeling himself blushing.

_-Well, let's take it easy; we're making Ander nervous..._ -Iman mumbled, smiling warmly at him.

Ander smiled back gratefully, and from that moment on, it seemed as if time went by much faster. He stopped feeling isolated, and when Omar's father asked him about his degree, he was surprised to realize that, for almost ten minutes, he had been giving them a lecture on why Spanish architecture was a world reference. Everyone listened to him attentively, and when he finished his explanation, he looked sideways at Omar, who was looking at him fascinated, making him blush again.

When they finished dinner, they both got up to take their plate to the kitchen, but Ander took it out of his hands.

_-I'll take it..._

_-You know you're my favorite architect?_ -Omar hummed with a huge smile as he handed him the plate.

_-You asshole..._ -He whispered without hiding his smile when he saw the way Omar was looking at him.

When he entered the kitchen, Omar's mother was there, so, clearing his throat, he muttered:

_-Where should I leave this?_

_-Here is fine, thank you_. -She replied, pointing to the empty spot next to her. 

She was throwing the leftovers in the trash, and when she finished, she turned to look at him. Ander let the air out slowly, smiling briefly at her.

_-Ander, welcome to the family._ -She said suddenly. _-I want you to know that it makes me very happy that you and Omar are together, really._

Her words made him feel a deep warmth in his heart. He had never expected Omar's mother to open up to him like that, so for a moment, he was speechless. Before he could thank her, she came up to him and hugged him gently. 

_-You don't need to say anything, boy. It was enough for me to see the way you look at my son, for you to win my heart._

When they left the kitchen, the rest of the family was in the living room chatting animatedly, and when his eyes met Omar's, he motioned for him to sit next to him. Ander did so, dropping gently onto the arm of the sofa, trying to join in the conversation, but once Nadia had finished speaking, several pairs of eyes looked at him as Yusef addressed him.

_-And where will you stay during these days, Ander?_

_-With my mother. Omar and I have agreed to do it this way while we receive the house's keys._ -He explained, stirring in the armchair without being able to help it.

_-I see..._ -Yusef nodded. - _It's good that you spend time with your mother; she'll be happy to have you for a few days with her._

Ander nodded as he listened to him, and Yusef continued:

_-But it's already very late today. She'll probably be asleep by now. You can stay here without any problem. In Omar's room, there is the bed that used to belong to Nadia..._

As soon as Yusef finished speaking, he felt Omar gently run his hand over his back, while Guzmán tried to stifle a giggle. Ander looked at him with the desire to want to kill him, but he realized that it was not only Guzman but also Lu, Nadia, and even Omar, who were holding back a laugh.

_-Yes... I think it's an excellent idea_. -Lu agreed, looking at him amused. - _They're both probably super tired from the long flight. So, I think we'd better go and let them rest. Nadia, Guzmán, could you take me home?_ -She asked, winking at them, an action that did not go unnoticed by Ander. 

_-Of course, Lu_. -Nadia sighed, giving her a knowing smile. - _I'm sure you'll sleep like a baby, Ander. My bed is very comfortable._

Ander looked at Nadia and curved his lips into a fake smile before turning to Omar's father.

_-Thank you, that's very kind of you_... -He mumbled, looking at Yusef, who had not noticed the joke that his suggestion had caused.

_-We are going to sleep too..._ -Omar's mother said goodbye a few seconds later.

When Omar closed the door to his room, he wrapped both arms around Ander's neck to look at him lovingly. 

_-Was it as bad as you expected?_ -He asked with a grin, pressing his forehead against Ander's.

Wearily, Ander arched his eyebrows. - _It was better than I expected, actually. But that doesn't mean it was easy, especially when everyone was laughing at my expense after your father's suggestion... including you, you dickhead..._ -He said the latter, softening his features.

_-I told you... My parents are happy for us. However, if I'm honest, I was surprised when my father suggested that you sleep here tonight._

_-Yes... in separate beds._ -He whispered, making them both laugh.

Ander looked around the small room curiously. Two single beds were arranged side by side. In the middle was a small bureau with a lamp, a clock, and Nadia and Omar's picture as children being hugged by another slightly older girl with dark curly hair that he immediately recognized as May; the older sister Omar had once told him about. 

It was the first time he had been there, but it was just as he had imagined it would be. It wasn't luxurious, but it had a very special homey warmth. Everything around him seemed so familiar... the place was permeated with Omar's essence. He immediately guessed which was Omar's bed because, on one side, attached to the wall, there was a wooden shelf with some books and movies perfectly arranged, and a pic of Omar and Samuel completed the decoration. 

_-Okay, I ask for this bed._ -He grumbled, plopping down on Nadia's bed as he hugged one of the fluffy pillows.

Omar looked at him, raising an eyebrow.

_-What are you saying, asshole? If we sleep cuddled, we'll fit perfectly in my bed._

_-And risk your father catching us sleeping together? No way! I don't want to lose the ground I've gained with him._

_-Andeeerrr!_ -Omar groaned, looking at him in disbelief.

- _Good night, cari..._ -He hummed, unable to hide a smile.

*******

**_December 24th_ **

Omar arrived early at Ander's house. He had promised Azucena that he would help her prepare dinner and had taken the opportunity to bring some groceries and vegetables from his parents' store. It was Ander's mother who opened the door a few seconds later, greeting him effusively.

_-Hi, honey! It's so good to see you! Come on in... How have you been_? -She took one of the bags Omar was carrying and hugged him tightly, giving him a resounding kiss on the cheek.

_-I'm ready to help you cook!_ -He answered happily as he followed her into the kitchen.

_-Where's Ander?_ -He asked when he didn't see him.

Azucena rolled her eyes as she shook her head.

- _He's still sleeping... Can you believe it? Now that you're here let's see if you can wake him up._

_-Okay, I'll go up to see him, and I'll be right down to help you._

The room looked like a cave. The curtains were completely closed, so they didn't let in even the slightest ray of sunlight. So as not to trip, Omar left the door ajar to let some light in, and without making a sound, he approached Ander. He curved his lips when he saw him as he sat on the edge of the bed, being careful not to wake him up.

Ander was lying on his side with a pillow between his legs, snoring softly. For a few minutes, he allowed himself to watch him with pleasure. Thick eyelashes rested on his high cheekbones, and that mole that he loved so much looked beautiful before his eyes; his mouth was relaxed, reminding him of the hundreds of kisses they had already shared by now; and his tousled brown curls cried out to be caressed. 

Letting out a sigh, he decided he would never get tired of watching him while dreaming of being able to wake up next to him every day of his life. First, Omar lightly brushed Ander's lower lip with the tip of his finger, tickling him, and then, he caressed his cheek, barely grazing his skin, feeling it a little rough from the incipient beard.

Ander woke up little by little, and when he opened his eyes and saw Omar sitting in front of him, a lazy smile came to his mouth.

_-Hello, stranger..._ -He hummed in a husky voice.

_-Stranger?_ -Omar echoed, amused.

_-Are you sure you're my boyfriend? Because I don't remember what it's like to sleep next to you anymore..._ -He mumbled, unable to hide a sleepy smirk.

_-Well, we'll fix that soon. Lu has managed to get the keys delivered to us in a couple of days... So, we'll be able to spend New Year's in our new house. Although... she's already threatened that we'll all celebrate in our house together._

_-Really?_ -He asked immediately, sitting up like a spring on the bed.

_-Aha..._ -He hummed, smiling at him with his eyes. - _So, enjoy now because when we're there, I won't let you close the curtains._ -He threatened him, waggling both eyebrows a couple of times.

- _Joder... Are we going to start arguing so early?_ -Ander whispered as he drew him to kiss him on the lips.

Ander was thrilled about the news, so he let himself fall back on the mattress, dragging Omar in turn, making him land on top of him.

_-I'd love nothing more than to stay here with you, but I promised to help your mother prepare dinner, so don't distract me._ -Omar said, kissing him on the tip of his nose before getting out of bed. 

_-Bah! Party pooper..._ -Ander grumbled.

_-Come on, come down. We'll need extra help._ -Omar asked him as he headed downstairs. 

Before leaving, he turned to Ander and shouted:

_-Ander?_

_-Mmh?_

_-I wasn't kidding about the curtains..._

_-Asshole!_ -Ander mused with a grin as he stuck his head under the pillow feeling like the happiest man in the world.

The dinner turned out very different from what Ander had imagined, and it was because, in addition to his mother, Omar, and himself, three unexpected guests arrived. At least for Omar and him.

_-So, you are Omar... my grandson's boyfriend?_ -Ander's grandmother asked, looking at him curiously, while she took a sip from her glass of wine.

_-That's right, it's nice to meet you, ma'am_. -Omar mumbled, fidgeting nervously in his seat as he looked sideways at Ander.

Ander made a sign with his eyes as if to say, _"don't look at me,"_ while he pressed his lips tightly to keep from laughing. If he had planned it, it wouldn't have gone any better. Now it was Omar's turn to deal with his family.

A few minutes before they arrived, his mother had dropped the news that his father and grandparents were coming to have dinner with them. 

Ander knew that his father had been trying to win his mother back for quite some time, and if she was okay with it, it was fine for him as well. Besides, he had to admit that his father had changed a lot in the last few years. If it hadn't been for him, he probably wouldn't have gotten the athletic scholarship in the first place. On the other hand, his maternal grandparents were so fucking cool. Although he rarely saw them, when he did so, he enjoyed their company immensely. Just like at that moment...

_-Don't call me ma'am. You're making me feel older than I really am, boy. Call me Bertha._

_-Okay, Bertha._ -Omar nodded, smiling willingly.

-Well, let's toast to that! -His grandfather laughed, raising his glass.

_-Ander, I want to tell you that you have very good taste. Omar is gorgeous. Ever since you were a kid, I knew you'd end up with a handsome boy, and you haven't disappointed me._

His father rolled his eyes at her. - _Now it turns out you always knew, Bertha..._

_-Yes, Antonio... Believe it or not, I have an unerring sixth sense. Like with you, for example... I knew that you would do your best to win my daughter back... And as you can see, I wasn't wrong._

_-Mom..._ -Azucena smiled.

_-That's enough, woman_! -His grandfather scolded her, although, by the affectionate look he gave her, Ander knew that the old man was also enjoying the moment immensely.

_-Okay... Okay, Martin, I get it!_ -The old woman complained, looking at her husband while she drank the rest of the glass in one go. - _Come on, honey, pour me another one_. -She asked Ander, winking at him.

Ander laughed as he obeyed his grandmother.

As the dinner went on, Omar began to feel much more relaxed. The reality was that, once the initial shock wore off, he realized that Ander's grandparents rocked. And as for Ander's father, he seemed much more cheerful than he initially remembered him.

_-So... I can see that this is serious._ -Antonio asked, looking at Omar.

_-It is._ -Omar replied firmly.

_-Well, I'm glad, boy. I hope you make my son happy._

_-Dad... Come on!_ -Ander groaned, feeling embarrassed. - _You say it as if Omar was asking me to marry him. Besides, I remind you that we already lived together in New York, so it's not a big deal. And to answer your question, yes, of course, this is for real._ -Ander winked at Omar. 

_-Well, who wants dessert?_ -Azucena asked, standing up. - _Omar baked it, and it's delicious._

That night, lying side by side, they watched the stars through the skylight. He had kept his promise by sleeping over, and as he looked up at the sky, a feeling of nostalgia came over him as he remembered the first night, he and Ander slept in that same bed almost nine years ago. They had changed a lot since then. He felt Ander's long fingers entwine his own, and he turned to see his face in the darkness.

It had been a pleasant night, after all. Ander let out a laugh as he remembered the look on Omar's face when his grandmother had begun to question him about his intentions for her grandson.

_-What's the matter?_ -He heard Omar whisper.

_-I was thinking about my grandmother_. -He answered, holding back his laughter.

_-Jodeeer! She's one of a kind! And you were complaining about my father?_ -He joked, kissing him on the temple.

_-Yeah, for sure, but she's right about one thing..._ -Ander whispered.

_-About what?_

Ander leaned over to face Omar, and looking him in the eyes, he confessed:

_-Well, that I have chosen the most handsome guy._

[ ](https://ibb.co/5x2XPb1)

Omar smirked as he listened to him, and lightly leaning in, sought his lips to deepen the kiss.

_-Merry Christmas, nene._ -Omar hummed, resting his head on Ander's chest.

*******

**_December 31st_ **

True to her word, Lu had organized the best _"open house"_ of the year, which, after all, had coincided with New Year's Eve. So, there they were, celebrating the start of a new cycle with all their friends. Lu had been able to transform a still empty house into an exquisite reception.

She had hired an agency to work magic on the place, following her instructions. Hundreds of small lights were scattered throughout the house, and several small tables with their respective stools filled the room, and lounge-type sofas completed the decoration. Of course, there was music, drinks, and good food. Everything looked impeccable.

Everyone had made an effort to be there, not only those who still lived in Madrid but also those whose life had led them to change residence. For example, Valerio had made the trip from Chile, and Carla returned from Paris just to celebrate their return. Although if someone would ask Omar, he was sure that a lot had to do with the fact that Samuel was still single.

Of course, there was also Nadia and Guzman, Samu, Lu, Rebe, Christian, and even Cayetana. There was a cheerful atmosphere all around; some were singing and dancing, and others were toasting excitedly. Ander and Omar were sitting at one of the tables looking at their friends, unable to hide their happiness.

_-So, what? Do you like our new house?_ -Ander smiled without missing a beat in his answer.

_-You have no idea how much. Now we just need to furnish it._ -Omar smiled.

_-Well..._ -Ander shrugged. - _We've already bought the most important thing_. -He grinned as he remembered that a day before, he and Omar had gone to buy a king-size bed.

At that moment, the music stopped, and immediately, Lu's voice was heard.

_-Are you ready? Start the countdown! Ten, nine, eight..._

Everyone chanted the countdown in unison while Omar was lost in the depths of Ander's eyes. Everything around him ceased to exist, and the only thing he was aware of was the man sitting in front of him.

_-...Three, two, one! Happy New Year!_

_-Happy New Year, nene!_ -Omar mumbled, unable to hide his happiness.

_-Happy New Year, Omar._ -Ander replied to him at the same time. And bringing his hand to the back of Omar's head, he drew him to kiss him deeply. 

Omar closed his eyes as he felt the warmth of Ander's tongue making its way across his lips and grabbing him by the nape of his neck as well, kissed him back with the same urgency. Unlike other years, Omar was sure that the happiness they both felt would be permanent this time.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Rebe's thunderous voice forced them to separate.

_-Happy New Year, maricón!_ -Rebe shouted, filling Omar with kisses, only to release him a few seconds later to hug Ander as well.

_-Happy New Year, handsome!_ -She shouted excitedly, throwing herself into his arms to continue hugging the rest of her buddies.

That night, like many others, was magical. They both flowed in the same tune, and Ander could only feel grateful for this new opportunity that life was giving them.

When the party ended several hours later, Omar approached Ander, who was sitting on one of the small sofas. Without needing to speak, he rested on the arm of the couch and wrapped his arm around Ander's neck, and placed a kiss on his temple. Ander closed his eyes, and smiling, brought his hand to close it over Omar's. 

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

They stayed like that for a few seconds until Omar whispered in his ear:

_-Do you feel like celebrating properly?_

Ander chuckled as he listened to him, and without further ado, stood up and drew him into their new bed.

*******

**_A year and a half later_ **

Omar came out of the shower feeling more relaxed. He'd had a tough day, and the only thing he had been looking forward, was getting home. As he pulled on an old t-shirt and a pair of boxers to sleep in, he glanced sideways at Ander.

_-What are you doing?_

He was sitting on the bed leaning against the headboard, with his laptop on his lap. Hearing him, he closed the computer and, leaving it on the bedside table, rubbed his eyelids.

_-I'm working..._ -He mumbled, stifling a yawn.

_-Are you tired?_

Ander nodded, craning his neck in circles until he heard a crack.

_-So much so that you can't make love?_

When he saw Ander grin shyly, Omar shook his head, dropping down beside him. Ander looked exhausted and even a little thinner. Six months ago, he had teamed up with a friend, and between the two of them, they had opened their own architectural firm. It had been a huge step toward the financial independence they were both seeking, but it also meant that he now had much less free time. He was working more hours a week, and although Omar understood the importance, he hated Ander being sucked into work like that.

_-What did you eat today?_ -Omar asked, looking at him suspiciously.

_-A sandwich and coffee._ -Ander grimaced because he already knew what Omar would say next.

_-Ander, you have to start setting boundaries and schedules. I'm serious._ -He blurted out in a tone that brooked no argument.

_-You smell so good..._ -Ander inhaled deeply against Omar's neck, tickling him, and then began to nibble Omar's skin gently.

_-I know what you're doing..._ -Omar moaned, kissing him briefly before continuing to speak. - _Don't try to distract me, asshole._

Ander broke away reluctantly, snapping his tongue.

_-Omar, we've already talked about this... Don't overdo it. We've won an outstanding tender, and I can't fail._

_-I'm not overreacting tío, I'm worried because you're not eating well, and you're not sleeping as you should._

_-Look who's talking. You've been traveling so much lately that we hardly see each other._ -He grumbled, leaning his head against Omar's shoulder. - _I miss you, jodeeer..._

Ander knew Omar was right, but today more than ever, he couldn't slow down. He was sure that once he delivered the final mockups, he would have time to relax a bit. On the other hand, since Omar was working on that new series, he had started to travel so much that sometimes they only saw each other a couple of days a week, and although he tried to psych himself up so it wouldn't affect him, it was useless. He was lonely wandering around the empty house, missing him terribly. It was a fact how unhappy he felt when Omar was not by his side.

_-I miss you too, nene, but in two months, we'll finish shooting, and everything will go back to the way it was before._ -Omar raised his arm to make Ander feel more comfortable, and while he spoke, he caressed his curls absentmindedly.

_-Until you start the next project..._ -he blurted out helplessly. 

Omar had gotten a job at Netflix Spain as a production assistant. Still, after a few months, the executives had realized how talented he was, and very soon, they allowed him to be part of the main team of directors of a new series they were about to launch.

Ander was very proud of him, but sometimes he longed for the life they had before. When they lived in New York and had fewer obligations; when all they cared about was finishing their degree and deciding what they would do on the weekend.

_-Ander... you know this is important, and it won't be like this forever. It's just that now I need to take advantage of this opportunity and save enough money to become independent._

_-I know, and I get it, Omar. It's just that sometimes it's hard to come home and not find you. That's why I take refuge at work... so I don't miss you so much._

Omar let the air out slowly and moved a little so he could look him in the eye.

_-Let's do something. Let's plan a vacation. What do you say?_

Ander looked at him as if he was losing his mind, but still, he wasn't able to suppress the silly grin that began to form on his face.

_-What? We can't; we're swamped with work, Omar._

_-So what? Let's escape for a week_. -Omar mumbled against his temple.

_-When?_

_-Next month... To celebrate our birthdays._

He had been so absorbed with work that he had almost forgotten that it would soon be their respective birthdays. Omar was a year older than him, but they both had birthdays in July. First, his and then Omar's a week later. The idea of sending everything to hell even if it was just for a week was too tempting to ignore, so rising slightly to lay on top of Omar, he asked him curiously:

_-Where do you want to go?_

_-With you? Pfff... To the end of the world._

Ander would have laughed if he hadn't been too busy kissing his boyfriend. He knew that the next few months would be complicated, but he was sure that all the sacrifices they were both making would be rewarded in the near future.

When Omar deepened the kiss and began to caress his torso, the last coherent thought that crossed his mind was that he wasn't so tired after all.

*******

**_Three months later_ **

It was after 9 pm when Ander arrived home. He had told Omar he would prepare dinner, but a last-minute meeting with his partner had spoiled his plans. So, when he opened the door, and the smell of food invaded him, he couldn't help but feel guilty. He walked into the kitchen, and as soon as he saw Omar with an apron on preparing dinner, he put a hand to the back of his neck and gently massaged it.

_-Joder... I'm sorry._ -He came up behind him and rested his chin on Omar's shoulder as he wrapped his arms around his waist.

_-Hey..._ -Omar whispered by way of greeting, tilting his head enjoying Ander's kisses.

_-I'm late, I know... Something came up last minute, and I didn't have time to let you know. Do you forgive me?_ -He whispered.

_-Only if you set the table and wash the dishes_. -Omar mocked. 

_-That's fair enough._ -Ander agreed, reluctantly releasing him to start setting the table.

_-Ander! Wash your hands first._

_-Joder Omar, you're worse than my mother._ -He grumbled, but still, he did what Omar asked him to do.

A while later, they sat down to dinner chatting animatedly. Omar told him about the details of the last shoot, and Ander, in turn, told him about the progress of his new project. As he listened to him, Omar watched him closely. It was amazing to see the passion Ander put into everything he did, and that only made him fall more in love with him, if that was even possible.

Halfway through dinner, Omar looked at him, studying his features, thinking about the best way to tell him what he had been thinking.

_-What's wrong with you? Why are you looking at me like that? -_ Ander asked, raising an eyebrow. 

_-What?_ -Omar leaned back against the back of the chair as he took a sip of his beer, trying not to laugh.

_-Omar, I know you. Something is wrong with you._

Ander stirred nervously, trying to figure it out, but seeing Omar's relaxed attitude, he calmed down a bit.

_-You're wrong... Nothing's up with me. It's just that I wanted to talk to you about something._

_-About what?_

Omar pulled out his cell phone, reached out his hand, and motioned for him to take it.

_-Look... Isn't it adorable?_

Ander looked at the pics for a few seconds and then looked up to meet Omar's playful gaze.

_-What? I don't get it._

_-He's up for adoption. A friend of Rebe's found him and is looking for a home for him. And well... we have a big backyard, and I thought we could..._

_-Omar, no. There's no way we're adopting a dog._

_-Ander! Why not?_ -He groaned with a sort of pout.

Ander had to admit that, just as Omar had said, the mutt was adorable, but just thinking about all the care and attention a dog required, he knew it wasn't a good idea. 

_-Because we both work a lot and are away most of the day. We can't take care of a dog. And even less of such a big one. Jodeeer, he even looks like a fucking sheep!_ -He concluded, trying to bring Omar to his senses.

Omar loved animals and had always wanted to have a dog, but his parents had never allowed them to have one, so when Rebe showed him the pictures, he immediately fell in love with the furry one. He knew Ander would refuse at first, but he was sure he could convince him. So, without further ado, he stood up and, approaching the chair where Ander was sitting, wrapped his arms around his neck.

_-Don't say no._ -Omar hummed against his ear. - _Look, let's do something... let's see him first, and once we know him, we could make a decision. If we see that it's not feasible, I promise I won't insist anymore._

Ander shook his head, leaving Omar's cell phone on the table.

_-No, no way, Omar. I don't want to go because I know that we will end up adopting him once we are there. A dog implies a lot of responsibility, and you frequently travel, so you are perfectly aware of who will end up taking care of him._

Omar let out a snort and, releasing him, headed towards the room.

_-Omar, don't be childish!_ -Ander yelled, trying to talk to him, but Omar just looked at him and, twisting his mouth, continued on his way.

Fifteen minutes later, Ander got into bed. Omar was lying checking his phone, his back to him. Ander crawled over to him and noticed that Omar was still looking at the dog's pictures. 

[ ](https://ibb.co/wCfgwB3)

_-Are you pissed off?_ -He whispered in his ear while he placed an arm around his waist.

_-Leave me alone._ -He hissed.

_-Omar, do you know you're behaving like a child? Even if you don't admit it, you know I'm right. I've given you valid reasons why we can't adopt that mutt._

_-Aha... Whatever you say._ -Omar mumbled. 

He was disappointed by Ander's refusal, and although deep down he knew he had a point, he believed that if Ander had the will, they could both take care of the dog.

Ander rolled his eyes and decided it would be useless to insist any longer. He knew Omar and knew that the anger would last a couple of days, so the only thing he could do was hug him and hope that it would soon pass.

_-Don't hug me; I'm hot._ -He grumbled, letting go of his embrace.

Ander sat on the mattress and waited silently for Omar to look at him. When he finally did so, Ander spat:

_-Omar Shanaa, I'm not going to let you go to sleep being angry. Let alone not letting me hug you. Is that clear to you?_

Omar looked at him and rolled his eyes. It always made him laugh when Ander used his first and last name when they were in the middle of an argument, and the simple fact of seeing him trying to fix things between them had been enough for the annoyance he felt to vanish as if by magic. Still, he grumbled, lying down again:

_-If you really loved me, you'd at least think about it._

_-You're an asshole. That's called blackmail, and I'm not going to fall into your game._

Ander lay down next to him again, and wrapping his arm around Omar's waist, dragged Omar closer to him.

_-I love you even with your childish outbursts. In fact, you make me very horny when you get like this_. -Ander whispered in his ear.

Omar didn't answer him, but he grinned because he knew Ander couldn't see him. He loved Ander even if he behaved like a real asshole.

_-Dickhead..._ -He mumbled, making Ander chuckle and hug him tighter as a result.

_-I love you... You can't imagine how much._

_-Yeah, right…_

Ander grimaced and closed his eyes.

_"A dog? Pfff... No way,"_ -He thought before falling fast asleep with Omar in his arms.

*******

**_One week later_ **

Omar looked once more at the brief message Ander had sent him and let out a snort. During the whole week, Ander had been behaving rather strangely, and regarding him, he had been somewhat distant because of Ander's refusal to adopt the dog, but at this point, he was no longer interested in arguing with Ander.

Omar turned his attention back to the GPS and shook his head. Ander had summoned him to a place near the forest, and he had no idea why. Ander had told him that it was important and that he needed to talk to him.

He wanted to think that it wasn't about anything wrong since things between them were fine. They had both adjusted to their busy schedules and had found a way to spend more time together, so he wasn't clear on why Ander wanted to talk to him in a place so far away from their home. 

When the GPS showed he was close, he slowed down and looked carefully, trying to spot Ander's car. When the road started to get narrower, he parked and got out of the vehicle. He pulled out his phone and dialed him.

_-Ander? Where are you?_

_-Hey... I'm almost there. I'll see you soon_. -And without further ado, he cut the call.

Omar looked around and, letting out a sigh, leaned back against the car to wait for him. He lit a cigarette and inhaled a deep puff trying to mitigate the nervousness that had begun to take hold of him. Ander was acting fucking weird, and every minute that passed only made his mood worse.

_-Jodeeer, I can't believe it!_ -Ander chuckled, glancing sideways towards the passenger seat where the mutt was watching him nonchalantly.

_-I just hope you behave yourself and be a good dog_. -The dog immediately turned his head and raised his ears as if he knew Ander was talking to him.

Ander was talking to the mutt while he was driving. The dog let out a bark and immediately gave him a couple of licks on the cheek, making him laugh.

_-Jodeeer... Don't do that; behave yourself._ -He scolded him, but deep down, he felt joyful. Every time he thought about his plan, he felt his stomach flip. He could only imagine the look on Omar's face when he realized everything.

A few minutes later, Ander arrived at the meeting point. He stopped the car at a considerable distance from where Omar was. Omar was smoking and looked nervous. Ander inhaled deeply and wiped his sweaty hands against the fabric of his jeans. He turned to the fluffy dog and uttered to him:

_-Be a good dog and behave yourself. Don't bark and don't move._

The dog looked at him with his big black eyes like marbles, and seconds later, he lay down on the seat without making a sound.

_-Good dog..._ -He whispered, smiling, closing the door.

_-Hey..._

When he was in front of Omar, he kissed him briefly on the lips and then took a couple of steps back.

_-Why the hell are we here?_ -Omar looked at him suspiciously.

Ander smiled and shrugged, looking around.

_-What do you see?_

_-Really? What are you playing at, Ander?_

_-Answer me._ -He smiled without being able to help it.

Omar sighed, knowing Ander wouldn't tell him anything else. He looked around once more and then, turning to his boyfriend, he reluctantly replied:

_-Trees? Bugs? There are probably wild animals too... Seriously Ander, why did you bring me here?_

_-My grandparents left me this land. And do you know what I see?_ -He questioned him, raising an eyebrow, while he handed him his phone so Omar could see the pic he had there.

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

Omar stared at the pic for several seconds without saying anything. Gradually, he began to feel his pulse quicken as he understood what Ander was trying to tell him. Still, he wanted to make sure he followed him, so he looked him into the eyes, trying to read him.

_-Omar... I want to build our own house here. I've started working on the house plans._

Omar looked at him in disbelief. He opened his mouth only to close it seconds later without uttering a word.

_-You don't say anything?_ -Ander urged him to speak as he approached him to wrap both arms around his waist.

_-Our house here? What are you saying? We already have a house..._ -He tried to reason.

_-A house we are renting. I know this will take time and a lot of money, but that's why I wanted to bring you here before making any decisions. We would have to save at least a couple of years, and then we could start building it. What do you say?_

Omar looked at him as if he had lost his mind but slowly began to curve his lips into a frank smile. He felt as if a thousand butterflies were fluttering inside his guts. 

_-Joder..._ -Omar only managed to whisper, not knowing what else to say. 

Before he could ask anything else, Ander released him from his arms and looked at him expectantly.

_-So? Is that a yes?_

Omar laughed as he nodded. 

_-Fuck yeah!_ -he hissed. - _I'm freaking out, Ander! It's beautiful!_

_-Did you notice that the windows are floor to ceiling? That means there won't be curtains_. -He raised both eyebrows, making Omar laugh.

_-I can't believe it, tío..._

Ander looked at him, amused.

_-Omar, can I ask you a favor? I left the plans in the car. Could you get them while I do a little walk around inspection?_

_-Okay..._ -He whispered excitedly. 

As he walked to Ander's car, his mind seemed like a whirlwind trying to assimilate what was happening. He was so focused that he didn't notice the dog staring at him through the glass. It wasn't until he heard a bark that he lifted his face, and that's when he saw it. He opened his mouth and ran to open the door, and immediately, the furry one jumped into his arms.

_-Andeeeerr! -_ He shouted excitedly as he hugged the dog.

He turned around and spotted Ander smiling at him a few meters away. Omar ran towards him to hug him tightly, causing them to lose their balance and fall on the grass.

_-You asshole!_ -Omar panted against his lips, unable to hide his happiness. _-How, when, why?_

_-I assume that means you're happy, right? Do you already know what you're going to name him?_

The mutt looked at them curiously as he sniffed around.

_-Jodeeer! You're the best boyfriend in the world._

Ander bit his bottom lip, and looking at the dog, mumbled:

_-Hey, what's the mutt got hanging around his neck?_

Omar frowned and then looked at the dog. He moved his hand towards the furry dog, and it was when he noticed a blue ribbon with a small box tied to it hanging around his neck. With trembling fingers, he undid the knot and held the small box without daring to open it. He felt as if his heart would jump out of his chest at any moment, so he gulped and turned to look at Ander, who was looking at him as if he was the most important person in the world.

_-Aren't you going to open it?_ -Ander whispered, biting his lips.

When he saw that Omar was still hypnotized looking at the box in his hand, he smiled and took it from him. Seconds later, he opened it, and there, there was a pair of gleaming platinum rings inside. Ander cleared his throat, and taking one of them, looked Omar in the eye.

_-You know, I don't want to be the best boyfriend in the world anymore. I'd like to be the best husband. Omar, will you marry me?_

Omar couldn't speak. He felt a lump in his throat from emotion, while tears of happiness streamed down his face. Never in his whole life had he experienced such absolute happiness as in that instant, and he could almost feel himself floating.

_-If you don't give me an answer now, I'll start to get nervous..._ -Ander whispered, running his thumb across Omar's cheek to wipe away a tear.

_-Jodeeer... YES! Of course, I want to marry you, asshole!_

Ander couldn't, and wouldn't, contain the deep emotion he experienced as he slipped the platinum ring onto Omar's left finger. 

Omar took the twin ring, and mimicking Ander, slipped it on his ring finger. Omar stared at him as the rings glittered proudly on their hands. He felt as if a lump was squeezing his throat, preventing him from finding the words that were crowding his mind. So, dropping his body over Ander's, he did what he did best.

With each kiss and with each caress, Omar showed Ander the deep love he felt for him. Ander was everything he could ever want in life, and that feeling of belonging made him feel fulfilled.

As soon as he felt Omar deepen the kiss, he half-opened his lips, enjoying that pleasant sensation. He was sure he would never get tired of feeling the warmth of Omar's tongue exploring his mouth.

Every time Omar touched him, he experienced the same thrill he felt the first time, but today with the absolute certainty that it would be forever. He closed his eyes and got carried away, daydreaming, imagining what it would be like to share the rest of his life with the man he loved.

The mutt -who watched them wagging his tail back and forth-, was the only witness to the unbreakable love that existed between the two of them.

**_The end._ **

[ ](https://imgbb.com/)

*******

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you got to this last part, I want to thank you so much! So, did you like it? 👀
> 
> ***
> 
> I'd love to know your thoughts about a possible continuation of this series. I have some ideas: 
> 
> The first one could be the third part of this fic. (with a lot of drama, angst, and sweet moments as well).
> 
> The second one could be an epilogue of this fic a few years later.
> 
> The third, a totally brand-new story about Omander (trying to guess what might happen in season 4)
> 
> Or the last option could be, do nothing. Haha! Maybe, it's time to let them go and take a break ...
> 
> I would love to know your opinion.
> 
> Anyway, thank you for being here all this time. It was a pleasure to read your feedback!
> 
> PS. WHAT NAME WOULD YOU GIVE THE DOG? 🐶
> 
> xoxo 🖤💙


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